Category: Words

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Miscellaneous, Words

A Gentle Hello

Years ago, when Dave was sick in the hospital on any given Sunday, it bothered me to sit in the church service on my own. It was a reminder of all our pain.

After he died, I had to learn a whole new way of living. Sitting alone has gotten easier with practice, and now, I don’t mind.

These days, if certain friends are there, we will sit together. Still, we don’t always coordinate our schedules between the two services, so it may be hit or miss.

A couple of weeks ago at church, I sat in my usual area and waited for the service to begin. Sometimes, I catch up with emails or texts. But generally, I look for others who may need a friendly face to sit with. Not for my sake, but to encourage them.

That Sunday, I saw a young woman sitting alone in the pew in front of me. I leaned forward and introduced myself with a gentle hello.

To my surprise, I got a gruff ‘hey’ back. I asked a few more questions about herself, including her name. (Let’s call her Anna.) Mostly one-word answers. I could tell she didn’t want to talk with me. So, I silently prayed for her and left her alone.

The service ended, and by that time, one of my friends had come to sit with me. My friend and I started talking while I kept my eye on Anna. She quickly gathered her belongings and walked away. I noticed she lingered about fifteen feet away, but I couldn’t tell if she was needing prayer up in front or wanted to talk with me.

I decided to pray for her that following week, that God would soften her heart and meet her needs. I didn’t know what was going on, but I am glad He knows exactly what we need!

Then last week, I missed church because I was working. My mother-in-law was able to take Lydia to church for me, and thankfully, I can watch the service online! 

So, this week, I started off the service by sitting alone. I texted a couple of friends, but they had gone to the other service. Before I sat down, I greeted a couple of guests behind me and explained a few things about our church. They were very friendly.

Then, as the first song began, we stood up and started to worship God. That’s when I saw Anna make her way to the pew in front of me. Before she sat down, she saw me and quickly came over asking if I was the person that greeted her two weeks ago.

Of course, I said yes and invited her to sit with me. Anna apologized for her bad attitude from before and admitted she has been on the “wrong path” and that she is trying to make better life decisions now.

Apparently, she had been grumpy with me because she didn’t really want to be in church that day! She had been wrestling with God about her choices.

It was so cool to see the change in Anna’s attitude and on her face. We talked for a few minutes and I learned more about her background. After the service ended, we talked a little more.

I mentioned how difficult it is to do the Christian life on our own. Then, I introduced her to one of my friends as they have a few things in common. I’m hoping Anna will continue to come and get more involved.

As followers of Jesus, we often want to see Him do something BIG, or we wait around for a sign overlooking the small opportunities in front of us. Sometimes, God does give us a significant responsibility or task.

But how often does He just want us to say a gentle hello, or invite someone to sit with us? A kind word, smile, or prayer can go a long way in reaching people for the Kingdom of God. Don’t underestimate the power of being friendly!

Serving others may cost more than mere acknowledgment, however, so don’t stop at hello. It might mean picking someone up for an event or taking them to get groceries. In other words, God’s love is practical.

Let’s be open to all the possibilities and see what He does through us!

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God, thanks for the ways You use us. You can move large mountains, or work through a still, small voice. Help me not overlook simple opportunities to reach people for You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: Do you have a specific seat or pew at church, or do you like to move around? Do you enjoy greeting others or minding your own business?

Task: Wherever you are today, at church, work, school, or even the mall, take a few moments to get off your phone and look around for someone to encourage. Say hello or offer a compliment. Maybe it will be the start of a new friendship!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Wisdom, Words

Word Up!

Life gets so busy and it seems my brain is always on the go. I’m sure you understand! Sometimes, I take a break and let my mind wander in silence, listening and waiting on the Lord. This week, while I was sitting still, I was reminded of my ThinkUp app, which is a running list of personal affirmations.

I have written about it before, though it’s been awhile since I have used it. Still, listening to my own voice and recordings was moving. Over the course of a few minutes, I was struck by statements of faith and hard won victories. Rather than just a bunch of feel-good messages, each affirmation was really a declaration of God’s faithfulness. I could see how much I have grown and how far the Lord has brought me.

It was like years of random sticky notes and ideas were in one place, and I was able to review the memories attached to them. I teared up as I heard myself speak of trust, hope, and perseverance. Instead of affirming how strong I am or want to be, I was declaring God’s power and plan over my life. He has awesome things in store for me!

Later that same day, Lydia told me about a song she had heard from one of her friends. She thought it was a lighthearted and fun summer song, and she wanted to share it with me.

Based on the title, I was guessing what the first few lyrics confirmed. It was a modern tune by a popular artist, but it was a much different song than Lydia anticipated. Nonetheless, I turned this into a learning experience!

Lydia was horrified when I interpreted the song in mostly kid-friendly terms. She was horrified, and thanked me for catching it before she embarrassed herself. (Side note: I love that she can receive gentle correction with gratitude!)

I simply explained the World has different standards than we do. This is one reason we often listen to Christian radio, but I cannot control what happens when we’re not together.

We talked for a long time about popular culture compared to God’s loving expectations for us. Or, as Lydia put it, “Following God is like having GPS in your heart. If we ask Him for help and direction, He will never lead us astray.”

I confirmed my job as a parent is to protect her, teach her, and help her navigate these situations. We reviewed critical thinking skills and the importance of searching for God’s wisdom in daily life.

We discussed guarding our heart and minds, so only good things come in and go out. We role played how to speak up or walk away from ungodly influences. I also planted a seed so the future Lydia remembers she can come to me with all her questions and concerns. It’s never too early!

Our words matter, and we cannot take them back once spoken. We also can’t forget mean or vulgar things that we hear. So, we need to be wise!

We can bring life through speaking with Truth, grace, and encouragement. Conversely, we can also tear down and discourage others. We can plant seeds of hope or seeds of doubt. 

God’s words are still having impact today. What He set in motion at Creation is still happening! His Word will endure forever, so it make sense to put more value  on, or magnify, what He says than what the World tells us. Yes, we better… Word up!

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God, thanks for the power of Your Word. Help me be responsible with the words I say. Keep me accountable with what I put into my mind so that what pours out of my mouth is honoring to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: If you don’t know all the lyrics to a particular song, do you make up your own words?

Tasks: Tune your heart to God’s Word. Memorize Scripture and meditate on it. Be wise with your words (in person and online) today!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Words

Lessons in Miscommunication

On Monday night, Lydia and I started a movie that was based on Malta, an island in the Mediterranean. She had never heard of this before, so I had her look it up online. We found the flag and other pertinent details about the country.

I also told her that’s where (the Apostle) Paul was shipwrecked on his way to be tried in Rome. He was bitten by a poisonous snake, and the natives were surprised when he was unharmed. Paul was invited to winter there, and he healed several people and discussed Jesus with those in charge. (See Acts 27-28)

So, last night, we went to the store and bought blueberries, among other items. At home, Lydia noticed they were from Chile and asked where that is.

L: Is that near Italy?

N: No, Chile is in South America. Italy is in the Mediterranean… Oh, let’s finish that movie tonight, if we can.

L: Ok, sure! Was Paul born in Italy?

N: No, he was born in Tarsus (modern day Turkey?). He was a Roman citizen, but he was also Jewish, from the tribe of Benjamin. He ended up in Jerusalem and persecuted those who first believed in Jesus. But, then he had a lifechanging encounter with Jesus! 🤓

L: Oh, so does that mean Aunt Livi is Jewish?

N: 🤔 … ??  Oh! I thought you meant the Apostle Paul because we were talking about the Mediterranean! But, you were talking about Uncle Paul. No, his family is Italian, but he was born in the US. And, no, he’s not Jewish and neither is Aunt Livi!

L, cracking up: Mom!! Oh my gosh!

Ah, lessons in communication… or is that miscommunication?! 😆

Perhaps I went a little overkill with Lydia. But, I try to take advantage of all the opportunities I can! Plus, I sincerely thought we were on the same page!

Lydia and I laughed so much at how one thing lead to another. Though, I wonder how many times we make assumptions about someone means. This example is funny, but sometimes, there is more at stake!

This was a good reminder for me to make sure to pay attention to what Lydia is saying and what she actually wants to know. I don’t need to overexplain, and I don’t want to be insensitive to her needs. It pays to pause and listen!

If anything, we can take a cue from the Apostle Paul. We can speak up and speak clearly, pointing people back to Jesus. While I may not always do it perfectly, I am grateful He already knows what’s on my heart and mind. May we use our words to bring glory to God, trusting He will give us the right words when we need them.

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God, thanks for always communicating Your love for us clearly. Thanks for making Your love personal to each of us. Thanks for listening and leading us every day. May we listen and understand Your heart so we can translate that to others. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: Do you have a funny story of miscommunication?

Tasks: Tell me your favorite (funny) story of miscommunication… bonus points if it is with a kid! Remember to pause periodically to make sure you are communicating correctly.

 

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Words

Get A Grip!!

Last week, my coworkers and I received training on a device that measures grip strength. The tool is called a dynamometer (say that three times fast!). There are other types that measure torque for engines, but, in healthcare, they are much more simple.

Dietitians use dynamometers to measure changes in grip strength over the course of time. We had fun figuring out the devices and practicing our skills on each other.

Through assessing grip strength, we can see changes in overall functional status and assess a patient’s risk for malnutrition. If you have lost a lot of strength in your hands, you have most likely lost strength elsewhere. Not to mention balance and coordination of major muscle groups. Think… stairs and fall risks.

Plus, if you are having difficulty opening jars and cans, or spreading peanut butter, or carrying heavy pots and pans, you may not be getting much variety in your diet. So, this could lead to other nutrition concerns, as well. Needless to say, building and keeping our strength is important!

While we were learning, the phrase “get a grip” came to mind. This translated to thoughts about how it might pertain to both God and life!

“Get a grip!” is often said in regards to someone losing it. In this context, it is most likely said in reference to a mental or emotional battle. However, that’s not really a fair assessment, as our individual struggles can’t really be measured from the outside.

We each face life with different coping skills, too. If two people are facing the same challenge, one person may fly through it and the other person may crawl. Especially during the holidays, in pandemics, and in times of grief.

Fear, anxiety, or worry all can build up and make us lose our focus. Or, we can feel out of control when we let obstacles overwhelm us. If this cycle continues, it can keep us from making progress in life.

Thankfully, our weaknesses are no match for God’s strength!

The Bible is full of verses about the strength of God’s hand. He is quite formidable toward those who are against Him. But even amid conflict and trials, He never stops thinking about and protecting His loved ones.

Psalm 138:7 (NIV), says, “Though I walk in the midst of trouble, you preserve my life. You stretch out your hand against the anger of my foes; with your right hand you save me.”

When God gets a grip, He never lets go! From my limited human point of view, I imagine this looking like a REALLY BIG bear hug.

To anyone who messes with us: “Don’t you dare mess with her!! Get out of here!! She’s mine!!”

And to those He loves: “Come here, dear child. Rest easy. I’ve got you right here, protected. You are mine.”

Whatever you are dealing with today, or this season, or this year, you don’t have to handle it on your own. Give it to God. He will sort through the mess and give you rest and peace. He will hold you close and give you His strength.

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God, thanks for taking such good care of us! You go before us and fight our battles. Please give us wisdom and courage as we rest in your grace and peace. Surround us with Your love. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you ever used a dynamometer? For engines or hand grip?! What comes to mind when you hear “get a grip?” How can you bring your worries to God today?

Tasks: Remember the impact our words can have on others. “Get a grip” comes in many other flavors, such as “get over it” and “move on already.” Be gentle and gracious.

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Personality, Words

A Simple Hello

One thing I appreciate about my job is that people say hello to each other in the hallways. Not everyone does this, but most people I see do reciprocate.

It makes me feel welcome and like I am part of the team. It helps promote a culture of respect, but it’s also good for employee morale and customer service.

Yesterday, I had an interesting thing happen. Someone I have been greeting over the last year finally greeted me back for the first time! It helps that I wasn’t focused on my phone.

I said ‘good morning’ to a lady and was so pleased when she said good morning to me! Now, that may not seem like a big deal, but to me it was.

You see, I always notice people from other cultures and backgrounds. It may be the style of dress or accent, but I love learning about other cultures.

I always put myself in their shoes (as much as I can) and consider ways to include them so they don’t feel like an outsider. 

I do not know why this lady never responded before now… Perhaps it is simply her personality. Perhaps she is shy or quiet by nature, but I felt it was a breakthrough.

To me, it seemed she is more comfortable and willing to open up a bit. She may not want to be close friends, and that’s certainly okay. I just hope she feels like she belongs.

Of course, someone doesn’t have to be from another culture in order to honor them. Truthfully, there are plenty of people who feel like outsiders.

We don’t have to automatically agree with others, or buy into whatever makes them different, but we should prioritize being kind and friendly.

Often, we don’t know what someone else is going through. In this current season, there are so many variables! Especially when we are wearing masks, it could be enough just to see them and listen. Encourage them to be who they are.

Or, maybe you can spend more time together and by doing so, point them to Jesus. Either way, be open and willing to learn.

Yesterday, when the lady greeted me back, I was so pleased because it showed something so simple can brighten someone’s day. It also showed me the power of being kind.

Additionally, I was reminded that we should keep doing good even we do not see results. Persistence pays off and Jesus is glorified!

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God, thanks so much for creating us uniquely. Help us look for the good in others and find common ground. Help us be a blessing to those around us. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: How does the environment where you work affect your performance and job satisfaction? What can you do differently to change your work culture in a positive way?

Task: Try greeting everyone you see today! Look for ways to show God’s grace and goodness to them. It could be a simple smile or hello, or it could be going deeper and getting to know others. Whatever it is, pray for wisdom, put down your phone, and be brave!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Procrastination, Wisdom, Words

Everyday Encouragers

Last week, I imagined how it would be in Heaven if we one day have to apologize to every person we maligned with our words or actions, even if they were unaware of it at the time. Awkward!

I often think about things like that. I enjoy using my ‘mind’s eye’ to grow and reflect, which helps me appreciate my current experiences and consider other perspectives.

That said, what if the opposite also occurs? What if we get to track down and thank every single person in Heaven for anything kind or helpful they did that benefitted us, even in the tiniest of ways? This could include an unexpected gift, or opening a door, or praying for someone, not to mention all the many ways we bless those we know.

Can you imagine how long that would take us? Good thing we will be there for Eternity!

Or, to take it a step further, think about how it would feel if we one day have to go up to everyone and say, “Sorry I didn’t say this sooner, but I really appreciated it when you…” or “Well, I meant to send you a card, but I didn’t because I was busy…” Ouch.

Again, I don’t have any indication that will actually happen, but it might be worth thinking about. If it makes you squirm a little, now is your chance to do things differently.

I know it brings God great joy when we are grateful and treat each other well.

Either way, we don’t have to wait to apologize or say thank you! Even today, our lives, words, and actions can ooze grace toward others and win them to Jesus Christ.

Our words can bring life to a dying world. What a privilege!

We don’t need a special occasion or reason to be a blessing. As we go about our day, we can encourage others. We can apologize when needed and say thanks, too.

We can compliment each other and shout out any good we see.

Also, don’t wait to tell someone you love them. You may not get another chance.

Finally, don’t wait until life slows down… that may never happen! Just make it a habit to be generous and kind as you go throughout your day!

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Father, thanks for all You do for us. Help us grow in grace and gratitude, so we can share Your love with others. Help us be mindful of the impact of our words. May we use them to bring life and glorify You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Does this blog post comfort, convict, or challenge you? What changes will you make as a result?

Tasks: Look for ways to use your words and bless others today. Send a thank you note, praise someone for their efforts, compliment clothing or kindness toward others. Be generous when spreading grace and joy today!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Prayer, Wisdom, Words

Taming the Tongue

When my siblings and I were little, whenever we were mean to each other, our parents would make us apologize, ask for forgiveness, and then give each other a hug.

Did your parents do the same with you?

I practice something similar with Lydia, but since she is my only child, we often do this together. Yes, I have to model it if I want her to understand what to do!

Lydia also keeps me accountable in other ways, such as when I am driving.

“Grrr! Nice turn signal, Buddy!” Or, I may say some other variation of that. 😉

Then, Lydia will tell me, “Mom, you know they can’t hear you.”

“Thanks, Lydia. I’m just frustrated. They are driving really slow and not using their signals.” Or, maybe they pulled out in front of me, cutting me off. You get the idea.

Sometimes, I honk at the other car, too, though that doesn’t happen as often!

Recently, someone cut across traffic into my lane without any signals, and then moved slowly ahead. But, then I heard Lydia’s gentle reminder and calmed down. We were safe and… maybe they were lost. I took the cue to enjoy the slower pace and pray.

Soon this thought entered my mind: What if someday in Heaven, we each have to track down every person we hurt or offended… then apologize and ask them to forgive us?!

That includes every word, thought, or action. Even if they were unaware of what happened. That would cover yelling at other drivers, gossiping about other people, our written words, or even turning the odds in our favor instead of benefitting someone else.

Imagine walking up to someone and saying, “Um, you don’t know me, but I owe you an apology. I’m sorry I said those things about you…”

I’m sure several people would be “eating crow!”

Our words are so important. They have creative or destructive power.

This week, I fielded a crazy trolling comment on social media. The person didn’t really want to discuss or learn anyting. He just wanted to spout off angry sentiments that had nothing to do with my original, encouraging post.

The man kept implying that my life is all ‘hearts and flowers,’ as if I don’t have much depth or the experience to understand all he was talking about. Ironically, he said, “I might hurt your feelings, but…” not even realizing that he was justifying his own hurtful actions.

Yet, instead of becoming offended or escalating the issues, I simply diffused them. I knew it was useless to chat with a complete stranger online. The best thing I could do was pray for him. Plus, I was conscious of the impact of my words, even if he was not!

To be clear, I have not read anything in the Bible that says we will someday have to apologize to one another for our hurtful or careless words. Not that we shouldn’t apologize, rather because of Jesus’ death and blood, we are forgiven and God doesn’t punish us.

However, Proverbs 18:21 does point out that Death and Life are in the power of the tongue. We are accountable to God, and He will reward us for every good deed someday. So, I want my focus to be on doing things that honor Him.

Today, let’s pick our battles. Know when to speak up and when to remain silent. We don’t need to have the last word, but we can always choose to be godly. Let’s tame our tongues!

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God, You are so gracious. Thanks for Your forgiveness even before we blow it. Put a guard over our mouths and help us tame our tongues. May all we say and do bring You glory. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: Have you been building others up or tearing them down with your words?

Tasks: Read James 3:1-12. Pray about your words and repent/apologize if needed.

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fruit, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Personality, Prayer, Wisdom, Words

Dearest, THINK

Like most people, I receive many emails everyday. Recently, I received an email that stood out. The email itself was of little importance, but what surprised me was that it started off with, “Dear Natalie.” I would expect that greeting in a thank you note, but even those are somewhat rare these days.

The email was professional in nature but it struck me as personal, friendly, and surprisingly refreshing. Just those two words, “Dear Natalie,” left me with a positive feeling about the situation.

It has been awhile since I have received an email that stayed with me like that. Perhaps that’s because much of what I (or we?) have seen and heard lately is bickering. We seem to have lost cordiality and common sense!

These days, what we say and do carries big impact. That’s always true, but now it seems there is even more at stake. Our interactions could affect someone else for eternity, either bringing them to Jesus or turning them off.

Yes, we all have opinions, and we have the ‘right’ to share them. However, we need to remember to hold these conversations in the proper time, place, and context so that others can receive them well. Otherwise, we are just a resounding gong or clanging cymbal!

There are opinions, and then there are facts. We tend to confuse the two and elevate the importance of opinions and preferences. Let’s take every thought captive and subject it to God’s Truth (2 Corinthians 10:4-5).

We can all quote the golden rule: Do unto others as you would have them to unto you.

Then there’s also the adage: If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.

Needless to say, we could all communicate better! Let’s see others as God sees them. Treat them with kindness, respect, and generosity. We are all in this together.

That may mean sending a kind note to someone who has been rude. Or, going out of your way to be generous to someone who took advantage of you. Or, just simply respecting the person enough not to argue back.

You may not agree on issues, and that is okay. But consider each person as if they were your own dearest family member. Your parent, your child, your sibling, your grandparent. Treat people well.

Lately, I have seen Christians belittling others in person and online for their choices regarding masks, school, social events, etc. That doesn’t bring God glory in any way!

Dear friends, let’s pray and think carefully think before we speak. Peacemakers.

Discussion is good, and action is even better. But, what we really need right now is God’s mercy and grace. He alone is the Solution we need. 

If we want to be angry, fine. But, let’s seek God’s righteous anger. We, as humans, clearly don’t exhibit anger very well! Let God’s love, care, and compassion lead the way.

If we seek justice, we need to seek Jesus. He is our Peace. If we make plans, let’s first discuss them with the Master Planner. He is our only Hope.

These are tough times in American culture and around the world. Prayer is our first step, not a last resort. After that, let’s listen to each other, walk wisely, and love like Jesus.

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Dear God, thanks for loving us so dearly. Thanks for taking such good care of us. God, we need Your mercy to deal with all our challenges. We cannot do this without You. Please give us wisdom and grace. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: If the Bible says we are to submit to the government and be obedient, don’t you think He will help us as we honor His word? What is at stake if we don’t? (That does NOT mean we follow blindly. We pray, vote, trust and obey God first. Fear God; honor the King.)

Tasks: Before you speak (or write) your thoughts, THINK. Is is True? Is it Helpful? Is it Inspiring? Is it Necessary? Is it Kind?

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom, Words

Discussion, Not Division

Well, here we are about halfway through 2020. I don’t think any of us expected it to be like this! So many wildcards… though, I am grateful God can take everything bad and work it for good in His time and in His way. He is faithful!

Lately, I have seen a few posts about how we need to ‘get angry’ and if we don’t speak up, we are part of the problem. On the one hand, I agree. Much of what has happened this year is upsetting and should absolutely be discussed.

But, I don’t make great decisions when I am angry or emotional. “Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires” (James 1:20). Besides, we don’t just need words, we need action. We have to make changes that will last.

Sadly, I have seen a number of my Christian friends flat-out argue with each other online about what needs to happen. Some of those are heavy topics, sure, but I hate seeing such division. I’m sure it breaks God’s heart, too.

It’s alright if we disagree! None of us is perfect is or has it all figured out. But we need to take better care of each other… be kind, be patient, listen. A house divided will never stand.

In many ways, it seems we are playing right into our Enemy’s hand, stirring up strife and hatred. Yet, Jesus said the world will know us by our love, not by our arguing.

Ironically, I have also seen several people tell others exactly how they should think or feel, march or protest, vote or use their voice. They have strongly stated it is unChristian or unAmerican to do this or that. This assumes the person agrees and shares their perspective.

This happened to me recently. I was rebuked online for pointing out facts in a news article that was clearly biased. The person said they “just did a quick Google search” to learn about the topic but then posted the article anyway. The topic had nothing to do with this person or where they live, and there is much more to the story than the one article suggested. I gently suggested looking at all the sides before making conclusions, but I received an eyeroll emoji and a strong rebuke.

I’ve come to the conclusion that this is one reason why people stay silent and don’t speak up in public. Yes, that needs to change to some degree. But, it seems we are damned if we do and damned if we don’t!

There are a variety of ways to tackle injustice or use your influence for good. Based on your personality and life experiences, perhaps you are comfortable leading the charge and voicing your opinions. You might have a quick ‘reaction time’ while others have a much slower fuse. That’s great! Just give others time to catch up.

Or, perhaps you prefer to have face-to-face conversations over coffee, volunteer locally, or write to Congress. If you like to work behind the scenes, thank you! We may never see the contribution you are making. I challenge you to speak up in your own way, and don’t let anyone tell you it’s not good enough!

Either way, there are many ways to serve, and each person can make a difference.

It’s okay if you don’t know how to think or feel on a topic. But do your own research.

Consider all angles before making decisions. It is wise to have as many details, pros/cons, and facts as possible. Don’t ask advice from random people on the internet, but do ask people who have experienced what you need to know.

The method may vary depending on the topic. Read your Bible and pray. Research key points through trusted resources, and/or study the science behind whatever you are thinking about. Have a good understanding of the issues at hand. Challenge your own opinions with facts!

Unfortunately, the public tendency to second-guess experts combined with the noise of social media doesn’t help. We can’t rely on easy answers for complex topics.

I have seen differences arise when one person is holding fast to principle while the other person is touting a different perspective. It is quite possible both people are right… Still, we can be compassionate as we seek to learn from each other. Discuss, but don’t divide!

For me, the bottom line is this: We represent Jesus to a world in desperate need of healing. Don’t stand in the way of anyone coming to Him!

Don’t let your behavior (online or in person) prevent anyone from meeting the One who died for them, the One who makes all things right. Find common ground. Use your gifts, talents, and platform wisely. Be an example, don’t turn people off!

Thankfully, in any situation, there is a right way that honors God. Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and Life (see John 14:6). Therefore, our goal as Christians is to always find the best path forward (the one that pleases God) knowing He will help us!

This includes a path of humility and open-mindedness. We may have to admit we were wrong, but growth means change is coming! Therefore, let’s embrace the discomfort knowing God is with us and for us.

The path forward ALWAYS promotes peace, justice, love, grace, and mercy.

Anything worth doing is worth doing well. Each of us has different goals and plans, but we can support one another and move forward together.

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Heavenly Father, thanks for holding us all together. You are sovereign, and we praise You! Please help us use our words to build each other up and not tear each other down. May we stand firm in what You have called each of us to do. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: As you speak with other people, are you letting your emotions get ahead of you? After you leave, are you still telling yourself you are in the right? Or are you able to let it go and praise God?

Tasks: Meditate on these verses: James 1:20; Ephesians 4:29; and Romans 14:1. Consider what you post on social media. Is it to gently inform or encourage? Is it truthful and helpful? Have you fact-checked your sources?

Posted on in Being Gracious, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Personality, Wisdom, Words

Love Moved First

I love how God always prompts us to move out of our comfort zone. He often guides us by placing several “markers” around us. For me, this most noticeable when sermons, songs, conversations, and circumstances all line up.

Being a mom also has a way of bringing up certain topics! It is important for me to set a good example for Lydia, so I can coach her through her own issues.

God’s timing and Lydia’s questions about friendship got me thinking!

Good relationships take time to cultivate. Friendships are an investment.

Over time, I’ve learned to take responsibility to preserve my friendships if I value them.

Then again, not every relationship needs to be salvaged. This can be especially difficult when feelings have been hurt and the other person doesn’t seem to care. Sometimes growth means growing apart instead of closer together. And that’s okay.

We live. We learn. We move on.

However, as long as it is up to me (Romans 12:18), I need to do everything God is asking me to do when things go wrong. I can forgive, even if the other person does not apologize.

Besides, forgiveness is not really about the other person. It sets me free and makes me right with God. Then, I can move forward with peace. Thank You, Jesus.

The true test of a good friend is that they point me to Jesus and bring out my best traits. They pray for me, call me out, and lift me higher. I do the same for them. 

We won’t always agree, but we will allow for each other’s differences. We will give each other the benefit of the doubt (instead of presuming the worst).

There will be both give and take in a healthy relationship. If it is a good fit, it will stand under pressure. But, I may need to prayerfully reconsider how close someone is (or should be) if it is always a one-sided relationship.

Thankfully, I can follow Jesus’ example. He did the right thing, even when it cost Him greatly. He made the first step while we were still unaware of the problem (Romans 5:8).

I can also take the first steps of obedience, even if what happened isn’t my fault or my problem. I can extend grace, even when it feels unfair. Grace, by definition, is undeserved. 

If I want to be like Jesus and live for Him, I have to be willing to go the extra mile and turn the other cheek. Ultimately, it’s not about me, but what God is doing through me.

Similarly, I don’t have to let someone’s stubbornness harden my heart, too. I don’t have to accept their behavior or abandon my convictions, but I can always be gracious.

In fact, the person may never change… but I can keep praying for them anyway.

Reaching out may mean calling or sending a card to let someone know I care. It could mean inviting them over to hang out, but that may not always be possible. In some cases, the best thing I can do is give the person space. Often, time and distance bring clarity.

Of course, each decision requires a certain measure of prayer and wisdom. Indeed, it can be challenging to be supportive yet not get sucked into someone else’s drama! A true friend will show up and be willing to have difficult conversations.

As long as I set solid boundaries, I am able to let God direct my path, knowing He will bring the right people in my life. And while it is sad when people choose to leave, I can continue being kind and trust God will be good to them as well. He loves us all so much!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for Your unconditional love. Help me love people like You do, with hope, grace, and perseverance. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Is there a relationship in your life that needs a little extra TLC? How is God leading you? Is there something specific you should do to reach out?

Tasks: Listen to the song, “Love Moved First,” by Casting Crowns.