Category: Parenting

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Wisdom

Finding Grace #548

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was a pretty good week, a mix of slower days with some important decisions!

Work was busy but fun. I brought some no bake cookies for a coworker’s birthday treat. I even took a few walks with my coworkers in between patients. I made sure to take them through the healing garden to count the Monarch butterflies. I introduced four of my coworkers to them this week, and at one point, we counted fifteen!

Lydia had a good week of school and likes her classes. She is learning to balance the block scheduling with one easier day and one that is more difficult. So far, the homework has been manageable.

This week, Lydia and I had to work through a situation where she disobeyed me. What she did was not the end of the world. However, I wanted to make sure she realized that sin always comes to light in the end. If we hide it, it will fester and then likely become a bigger issue when the truth comes out. Typically, Lydia doesn’t need me to discipline her much since she has a sensitive conscience and usually autocorrects. In this situation, she had already ‘fixed’ the problem, but failed to mention it to me in a timely manner… So, I enforced some real world consequences, and I hope she learned a lesson she won’t soon forget. We ended on a good note, and I am grateful for God’s help in parenting!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Miscellaneous, Parenting

Finding Grace #547

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

We had a good week easing into our next season!

Work was a little lighter this week. I was still fairly busy but had a few open spots, which let me catch up and work on some projects. It felt good!

The weather was perfect this week as we move closer to Autumn. I have enjoyed watching all the Monarch butterflies in the healing garden at work. Every day there seems to be a couple more, though I am sure they will soon start their great migration south.

Lydia had a great start to her Freshman year on Thursday. We went to the back-to-school night on Tuesday, which helped her feel more prepared. She likes her classes, and I think she will do well!

Today, Lydia worked on some homework, and I did my usual Saturday things. I’m trying to soak up the quiet, calmer pace before things really pick up in the next week or so!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Prayer, Wisdom, Worship

Quiet Confidence and Great Joy

When I was thinking of today’s blog post, I thought, “This is the calm before the storm.” Lydia starts high school this week, and I was thinking ahead about how crazy the school year can feel sometimes.

Beyond that, Lydia and I have already each committed to an extra activity outside work and school. For me, work is always a little bit of a wild card, so I anticipate that won’t slow down either.

Indeed, for the last three years or so, I have purposely held off on overcommitting to have margin and avoid feeling overwhelmed. I wanted to make sure I was available to help Lydia get through middle school.

Still, it struck me that school is not a storm to hunker down and get through. It is a normal part of life, and we are doing fairly well at the moment. Just as the Lord has been with us thus far, so He will be faithful still.

I am reminded of Isaiah 30:15 (NLT), in part, which says, “In quietness and confidence is your strength.” Now, the rest of that verse in context is pretty intense! It challenges the people of Judah: they did not listen to God’s prophets or turn their hearts to Him, so they deserved His punishment. It is a worthwhile verse to consider, but that’s not my focus here today!

Instead, I want to focus on that key part and also include a verse from Nehemiah 8:10. Quiet confidence, expectant hope, and great joy come from God’s Almighty strength. The word quiet makes me think of calmness, but also of sitting still, not trying to busybody my way through a challenge. Confidence in the Lord is trusting that He is enough and can accomplish what needs to be done. Joy comes from His steady presence amidst our trials. It is not about performance or perfection, but resting in the finished work of Jesus!

This school year, our strength and endurance will come from the Lord. I already know we will need His help to get through it. It would be foolish to think we can do it all on our own, or in our own strength. History shows… I need to prioritize coming to Jesus daily to get His input and help… resting in His finished work and His unspeakable joy.

Last night, we went to the back-to-school night at the High School. We spent almost two hours walking around the large school! Lydia is both excited and a little nervous. I reminded her the Lord is with her, and of Isaiah 26:3 (NIV), which states, “You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in You.” Thankfully, we have both been there for a few of her previous school activities.

Lydia is looking forward to more extracurricular opportunities. She is quite capable, but I am encouraging her to pace herself! Though if she needs to learn a lesson about signing up for “too much,” I’d rather have it happen sooner rather than later. The stakes only go up from here!

So, if you think of us, we’d appreciate your prayers for a smooth transition. We know there will be some bumps along the way, but God is good. With quiet confidence and great joy, we can rest in His unfailing love and strength.

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Heavenly Father, thanks for this new season! Thanks for walking with us, guiding us, and protecting us. Help us to keep our eyes and hearts focused steadily on You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What are you looking forward to this next season? What are you saying yes and no to right now?

Task: When signing up for a new activity or commitment, weigh out the decision before the Lord. If you have peace and a good attitude, it’s probably a good thing to do. If you feel dread or are doing it to please someone, it might be better to say no!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Food and Nutrition, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance

On Parenting Yourself

This week, I met with a patient for some of her chronic conditions. We have worked together for a few years, and she has slowly lowered her barriers to changing her eating habits. She is a Christian, and I see God working in her life to make her more like Jesus! Still, that doesn’t mean her challenges or post-traumatic stress are any easier.

She told me she has learned she sometimes has to ‘parent herself.’ She can have emotions like those of a little child, but as an adult, she realized she still has a certain level of responsibility. She said, “I can want to eat a pan of brownies when I am upset, but I have the responsibility to eat a balanced diet instead.”

She told me the formula she uses, in essence: “It is okay to feel something (insert an emotion), but I am still responsible for (fill in the action). I was so proud of her coming to this conclusion! She is more capable than she realizes, and I hope she keeps growing in that direction.

Soon, I started to think about how I could apply these “reparenting” principles in my own life. I don’t need to make huge changes, as I feel pretty confident in who I am and what I do. (I had great parents who kept us accountable!!)

Now I have always been very responsible when it comes to other people’s expectations. In fact, my first grade teacher wrote on my year-end report card that I was “very diligent,” and I still think about that today. Nonetheless, there are certainly days when I fail to meet my own goals. I know I am not the only one! 😉

Here are some examples I came up with! Feel free to adapt these for your own needs!

Financially, I can envision this working well. “I may want a new _________, but I have the responsibility to pay my bills on time and buy Lydia school supplies. So, I can be patient and save up for it.” Even just repeating the logic out loud could be a life changer for some people!

Physically, I thought of two situations related to rest and action. (Sleep)”I feel like watching another episode of this show, but I have the responsibility of getting up early for work tomorrow. So, I will push pause and go to bed now.” (Exercise) “I don’t feel like exercising today; I’m tired and don’t want to go jogging. But I have the responsibility to care for my body as a temple, so I will go for five or ten minutes.” Just keep it simple and listen to your body when it needs rest or movement!

Mentally,  we are called to renew our minds and to take every thought captive. So, if you are stewing on something, thinking about perceived injustices or revenge, STOP. Catch those thoughts, present them to Jesus, check them for Truth or lies, and change them. Think on these things instead!

Spiritually, sometimes we don’t feel like worshipping the Lord, praying, or reading our Bibles. Instead of skipping time with Jesus, we can just tell Him how we feel. He really wants our hearts, after all. “Lord, I don’t feel like sitting here with You, but You are so much better than anything else I can imagine. I want to know You more, so help me find delight in You, Lord.” Amen

Remember, God’s Holy Spirit works in us to make us more like Jesus. We can’t do anything to save ourselves or earn His favor. We already have it because of Jesus! Still, as the Apostle Paul wrote to the Corinthians, we must put away childish things and grow into Christ. It’s worth challenging our emotions from time to time and pushing ourselves a little bit!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for working in us and calling us higher! Continue to refine us so we can show others Your love and character. May we come to you expectantly and unhindered. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What is one area in your life that you can apply the basic formula above? How can the Lord help you through that challenge?

Task: You can read a little more about the concept of reparenting here. Regardless of your thoughts on it, it is still important to set good boundaries and regulate our emotions.

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Kindness, Miscellaneous, Parenting

Finding Grace #542

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was an interesting week! 

On Monday, I left work a few minutes early to deal with a washing machine issue at home. The repairman came on Wednesday, and as it turned out, a little facecloth had clogged and cracked a pump. So, that was a fairly easy fix and not too expensive. He said my toploader should last for a long time since it is well made and easy/cheap to fix. He implied I should keep it as long as I can since it “actually gets the clothes clean, unlike some of the newer models.”

On Wednesday, I worked a half day and then took off the rest to be available for the repairman. I used a “time off award” I earned last year. The repairs didn’t take very long, so I was going to do a couple of projects, but then I ended up taking a nap for almost two hours. I was still so exhausted from wringing out all those towels on Monday! It was glorious!

Today, I was on-call and had to go in for one patient. While I was gone, Lydia had a driving lesson. She is doing really well. We did a few Saturday things, and then we babysat a friend from work’s kids for a couple of hours. They invited us to stay for dinner, which included Asian-style salmon, veggies, and rice. It was delicious and very generous of them!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Parenting

Laundromat Lessons

Yesterday, Lydia and I checked out a new laundromat nearby!

On Sunday, Lydia washed a load of laundry at home, and I heard the washing machine make a weird noise. I chose to ignore it, but I did make a mental note to “keep an eye on it.” (That always seems to work well, right?!)

On Monday, Lydia texted me at work that her favorite hoodie had come back with some weird spots, perhaps not quite clean. I told her to rewash it, but I also mentioned staying next to the machine “in case something happens and you can stop it.” She did not hear me…

Instead, she took a shower before checking on her hoodie. 🙂 By then, the washing machine had overflowed, like it did last year. She called and texted me for help, but I was working with a patient and didn’t see her message for about two hours. At that point, I tried calling right away, but she did not answer. I called multiple times to no avail; her phone was on 4% and wouldn’t charge.

Then, I told my manager that I needed to leave right away to check on Lydia and make sure my house wasn’t flooded! I only had thirty minutes left on the clock anyway. I prayed that God would help me stay calm and help Lydia know what to do.

Thankfully, Lydia was fine, and she had put about five towels on the floor to soak up the water. She helped me clear out the items we have stored there, including the toilet paper I bought at Costco on Saturday. Almost everything was elevated off the ground, and I was very glad that nothing was ruined. A couple of boxes were wet, but the bottles inside were okay. Whew!!

Nonetheless, I spent about eight hours over that night and the following morning trying to soak up the water and wring out the towels. I turned off the water and also used a squeegee and a shop vac to help! Still, more water kept coming out from under the washing machine! On Tuesday morning, I called my manager to let her know I would be a little late. I was waiting to hear back from the repairman and needed to figure out a plan.

I went to work, but was also able to leave early to address the wet towels and laundry. Last year, we had a new laundromat down the block; I decided this was a good opportunity to try it out! I had Lydia come with me to learn how it works.

In fact, the machines were so fancy that I also had to figure them out, too! The machines accepted quarters, but there was an automated pay option via an app that was more convenient. The app synced with the washing machines and even gave us a countdown on when our laundry would be done!

While Lydia sat, I walked around to scout out the rest of the room. There were vending machines, beautiful bathrooms, a small play area and fish tank, a bookshelf, and several televisions throughout the seating areas. It was a better experience than I expected, and I told Lydia most laundromats are not like this one.

While Lydia should have stayed next to the washing machine at home, it wasn’t really her fault. Whatever the problem, it would have needed to be addressed at some point. As it is, the repairman should come today. I’m hoping it is just a clogged tube like last year and still worth keeping! Indeed, I’m pretty sure the Lord is singlehandedly keeping all my household appliances running for me! He is my Sustainer and Rock!

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God, thanks for always coming through for me and for protecting my house yesterday. It could have been much worse. Keep me focused on what really matters, not just what is convenient. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: When was the last time you were at a laundromat?! How is God sustaining you this week?

Task: Pay attention to the little noises and clues around you that something might be wrong. Don’t ignore them… or you might be spending time cleaning up more messes than you expected!

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Prayer

Finding Grace #540

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This week was full of activity but also full of God’s grace! We had a variety of activities each night. Some were planned, and some were spontaneous.

Work was wildly busy, which is about what I expected. I had a full schedule of planned patients, but I also needed to work on some projects and return some phone calls. It felt good to connect well with the Veterans and know God was helping me every step of the way.

On Monday, Lydia went to the county fair with friends. That night, I also had my monthly book club meeting. We had a great time discussing our book and sharing more about our lives! I have already started our next book!

On Tuesday, after work, Lydia had her third driving lesson. I prayed quite a bit because it was on the highway during a busy time. God came through for us, like He always does!

Wednesday night, I dropped off Lydia to watch a friend’s softball game. Then, I ran some errands. She got a ride home, which is good because I was deep into organizing around the house!

I mowed the lawn on Thursday, since the rest of the week would be hot. Lydia went to a sleepover with her friends, so I had the evening to myself otherwise!

Yesterday and today were a mix of organizing and relaxing. I ran some errands, did Saturday things, and watched a movie with Lydia. A good way to end a busy week!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Personality, Prayer, Wisdom, Worship

Parenting and Proverbs 3:5-6

The last several months have been great with Lydia. It is fun to see her spread her wings with her friends and make decisions apart from me. I have coached her through some challenges and at times bankrolled her, but it is good to see her thriving. And it has made me lean on the Lord even more!

Yesterday, Lydia had her third official driving lesson with her teacher! She has been doing well so far; however, I was a little nervous. You see, I had heard the teacher was taking Lydia on the highway for this lesson.

I have had Lydia driving on both I-29 and I-94 a handful of times, but not during Fargo’s “rush hour.” Obviously, the traffic is nothing like that in Chicago or Atlanta, but it can still be quite fast and busy. There are some crazy drivers at times!

So, over the last week, I had been praying that God would keep Lydia safe. After all, He loves Lydia even more than I do. And, when I saw it might rain, I asked my coworker, Natalie, to pray as well!

On Sunday, I took Lydia out for a quick highway lesson. We practiced merging onto the highway and exiting. I reminded her to be aware of her surroundings and to get up to speed as soon as she could. Then, yesterday, before I left for work, I coached Lydia to speak up if she was in over her head. She is typically pretty calm, but I wanted to remind her she had a voice.

I also reminded Lydia to have a snack before she walked to the school to meet the driving teacher. She admitted she was a little nervous, but I kept my own thoughts to myself! Now, I still deal with fear from time to time, but I am aware and working on giving it to God. I don’t want my fear or concerns to negatively influence Lydia.

All day, while Lydia waited to drive, I prayed during my work breaks. I had read Proverbs 3:5-6 that morning, which says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” (ESV)

I tried not to worry or overthink it, while praying that the teacher would have wisdom and that Lydia would have confidence. The weather forecast predicted rain, but I asked God to hold it off.

And you know what? He did! Lydia did a great job, and traffic was backed up due to road construction, which helped people drive more slowly in those sections. Even the teacher was surprised that they spent more time sitting in traffic, even though it normally flows quickly. However, he told Lydia she did well and passed the lesson.

Lydia texted me on her walk home, and I heard thunder just as she made it into our yard. Less than a minute after she walked inside the door, the rain let loose. It poured on and off for the rest of the night, and I praised God for answering my prayers!

When we trust God with all our hearts, we acknowledge He is in control as we submit our plans, thoughts, and feelings to Him. We remember His love for us and rest in Him, as we let God work on our behalf and do for us what we cannot. Thanks, Lord Jesus!

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God, thanks so much for protecting Lydia yesterday. Our Victory is in You! Thanks for covering us with Your mercy and grace. You are so good and faithful, Lord. Help us trust You more and more. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: How are you trusting God this week?

Task: As 1 Peter 5:7 says, “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”

Posted on in Fear, Faith, and Moving Forward book, Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Miscellaneous, Parenting

Finding Grace #536

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was a red-letter week for me, and I saw Jesus work in very personal ways. That said, all week I stayed up late and was groggy in the morning since I had extra activities. Plus, it is easy to lose track of time when it stays light until 10 p.m. in Summer! 😉

On Sunday, Lydia had her first official driving lesson with a professional. She has about 28 hours of driving with me, but I wanted someone else to fill in the gaps of things I might not think to teach her. She passed the first lesson with flying colors!

While she was driving, I had a meeting at church with one of our lead pastors. She’s in charge of the leadership program I finished, and we talked about next steps. I got to tell her about my previous experiences in teaching others, and there’s a possibility I could do more of the same. For now, we are going to have me step into a current system to see whether we can either provide support there or develop it further. I am grateful to serve and feel like God has me right where He wants me.

On Monday after work, I went to the chiropractor and then to a new book club at church. I am excited to share more later, perhaps, but I am excited for several reasons. It is a small group, and everyone there loves to read. We may have others join (men or women), but for now, there are just four of us. We plan to read one book a month, including a couple of suggestions I brought off my shelf at home. It ticked a lot of boxes for me on a personal level and I was praising God after. I am glad to make new friends, read several genres and discuss them, and actually tackle my stack of books!

Tuesday was my blog writing night, and Wednesday was church for Lydia. Pretty normal for us. But being busy every night made me not get around to mowing until Friday night. It was super windy and I got a lot of small dust and grass particles in my face, but I am glad I got it done.

On Thursday, a coworker convinced me to go with her to a dietitian social event at a local winery. It was a beautiful day, and I was feeling pumped with all that had already happened this week. I am so glad I went. It has been about thirteen years (since Dave died) that I have been involved with that group. I met five or six ladies, and we talked all about dietitian things and life in general. They were very welcoming, and I am sure I will go to more events!

Today, we went to Panera for lunch. Lydia was craving a Caesar salad, and we haven’t been in forever! Otherwise, I started my book for book club, started another class for church (on my own), and did other Saturday things. It was a perfect end to a great week!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fear, Faith, and Moving Forward book, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Personality, Prayer, Wisdom

Priceless

I was reading in Acts 19 recently, which talks about the Apostle Paul in Ephesus. He spent a lot of time there and grew to know those believers well. Through an interesting series of events, the believers began to radically change how they lived. They threw away resources related to idol worship and sorcery, a value of “50,000 drachmas,” when one drachma was worth a day laborer’s wage.

At one point, the local silversmiths and tradesmen resented Paul’s influence on their businesses. So, they gathered a bunch of ruffians and sparked a riot. The local amphitheater, seating around 25,000 people, was full of arguing and confusion. Eventually, after two hours, they were dismissed by the city clerk. If they didn’t disperse, the Roman officials would come to enforce their rule.

The crowd never did lay their hands on Paul, but they did rough up some of his companions. After that, in Acts 20, Paul left Ephesus (modern Turkiye) for other towns to encourage more believers. What stuck with me, though, was the 50,000 drachmas…

I had Lydia help me try to wrap our minds around this. It could be 10 days’ worth of money for 5,000 people, or any other combination. The amount is worth around $6 million dollars in today’s value!

I imagine it would take several of my neighbors and me selling our modest homes together to raise that much cash. The Ephesian believers, at least at that point in time, had their priorities straight. You can read more about them in Ephesians and Revelation 2.

Jesus is greater and more worthy. Following Him is costly, but the rewards are priceless. He is our Lord and King, but He takes good care of us, too. Similarly, we buy good things for our children and sometimes bless them as God has blessed us.

On Saturday, I bought Lydia a brand-new viola. I rented for the last three years and had a store credit to put towards buying one for her. She had some concerns with her rental viola, showing she knows the difference between what is working and what is broken.

I knew it was a matter of time before I had to make a decision, since many high schoolers transition to their own instruments. With it being summer, our schedule is a little more open, and it’s a good time to get comfortable with a new instrument before school starts up again.

We spent two hours at the store, and Lydia tried out five violas! We took notes on each one, and she played each one a couple of times. The last one literally came alive when she played, and she was all smiles. Of course, it happened to be the most expensive!

Still, I learned so much and considered the cost as an investment in her. She has a good ear for music, and she understands things more intuitively than some of her peers. It seems that some students cannot discern the subtleties among notes, problems, instrument quality, and the like, but Lydia can.

Oddly, choosing the right viola felt like a personal test for me. I have faced times where spending a little more money was the wise thing to do, but I went back and forth over whether it was worth it (and if I was worth it). Can you relate?

For example, thirteen years ago, when I was buying my new Subaru, I was unsure whether paying extra for a better backup camera was worth it. In my grief, I wondered if I could get by on the lesser one. But, through prayer, reflection, and some wise advice, I made the better choice. Now, I use my car’s backup camera daily!

When I realized what God wanted me to do on Saturday, I welled up with gratitude. I have learned a lot about how much God values me. I wanted to emphasize that to Lydia, too. She is a priceless treasure and worth way more than the cost of the new viola!

The amount was close to what I expected and planned for, just a little stretch. And I know there will be days when Lydia does not want to practice. I told her that if she decides to quit later in high school, then I get to keep the viola for myself. I don’t have much musical talent, so the thought of me screeching on it is enough for Lydia to take me seriously!

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God, thanks for showing us how precious we are to You. You are worthy of all our praise and adoration. Help us reflect all Your goodness and give You all the glory. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How has God been stretching you lately? What stood out to you in the post above?

Task: Next time you are faced with a costly decision, think through what is really at stake and how you can trust God to make the best choice. Also, watch this insightful archaeology documentary on the seven churches of Revelation, including Ephesus (17 minutes in)!