Category: Being Gracious

Posted on in Being Gracious, Food and Nutrition, Gratitude, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting

Let Us Salad

On Sunday, Lydia and I served at church during a lunch gathering for the Older Adults Still In Service (OASIS) ministry. This is for seniors to enjoy fellowship and implies that although they likely have retired, they are not done living, giving, serving, etc. God still has a good plan and purpose for each person until He calls them Home.

Lydia has a heart for the elderly, so I arranged a time for us to help out. My goal is to let her experience various ways to serve. We really enjoyed it! We set up tables and chairs, then added place settings, and more. Later, we picked up garbage, cleaned the tables, put away the chairs, swept, and so on. We did not do it for recognition, but many people thanked us. I think we will do it again!

Free Appetizer Background photo and picture

The potluck meal’s theme was “salads,” and people brought a variety of dishes. I recognized a retired NDSU nutrition professor, and we agreed that some were definitely from an old church cookbook somewhere! 🙂 We sat with her and enjoyed talking with all the seniors around us. We met some new people but also saw several we knew, including a few who have watched Lydia grow over the years.

In the Midwest, it seems just about anything can pass for a salad. We had taco salad, potato salad, macaroni salad, cucumber salad, multiple jello-type salads, fruit salad (with whipped cream, of course), a couple more dessert salads, and one token green salad. Many of the older adults took home leftovers, which made me happy as a Registered Dietitian.

After everyone ate, there was some worship time followed by a short sermon. We sang several hymns, and then the pastor asked us if we wanted another salad. We were all pleasantly full, but he went on to talk about the “let us salads” of Scripture.

Free Salad Fruit photo and picture

Here a few:

Romans 13:12 (NIV) says, “The night is nearly over; the day is almost here. So let us put aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light.”

2 Corinthians 7:1 (NIV) says, “Therefore, since we have these promises, dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God.”

Hebrews 4:16 (NIV) says, “Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”

Galatians 5:25-26 (NIV) says, “Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.”

There are even some “let us nots!”

Galatians 6:9-10 (NIV) says, “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.”

1 Thessalonians 5:6 (NIV) says, “So then, let us not be like others, who are asleep, but let us be awake and sober.

Well, I will never look at the phrase “let us” the same way again. It was a creative tie-in and pun, as well as a fun memory for us while we helped others. Let us spur each other on to good works!

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God, thanks for helping us spread Your lovingkindness to others. May we serve with joy and a grateful heart. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What is your favorite type of salad? Where do you like to volunteer?

Task: Read through more “let us” phrases. Some are just part of the narrative, but some of them are very applicable to us today!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Personality, Pivot, Wisdom, Worship

Becoming Like Jesus

“I have found that trying to become more like Jesus yields far better results than trying to become a better me.”

I came across the quote above last week on Substack, and it has stuck with me since. (I could not find the original source.) The process of becoming more like Jesus is a work of the Holy Spirit, commonly referred to as sanctification. It is not always fun or easy, but it is really the main work of God in our lives.

Our Heavenly Father wants us to come to Him just as we are; we don’t need to do a bunch of good things to earn His favor (that’s grace). At the same time, He also loves us enough not to leave us the way we are. So, God transforms us into the character likeness of Jesus and makes us holy, as He is holy. (Holy does not mean perfect, but set apart.) He is fitting us for Heaven!

Sanctification occurs when the Holy Spirit checks our heart and prompts us to do something different than we would in our own human power. This might be giving money or a favorite belonging when you’re feeling stingy. This might be biting your tongue instead of letting someone know what’s really on your mind. You know you are on the right track when something doesn’t seem fair, but you listen and follow God’s lead anyway.

Free Mountain National Park photo and picture

Slowly but surely, we start to think and act like Jesus. Our hearts become more aligned with His, and we are able to see things from a Heavenly perspective. The Holy Spirit is patient but diligent. If we make a mistake, no worries, He can convict us and set us straight. He is not condemning, but gracious with us if we are humble and repent (Romans 8:1).

Becoming like Jesus is never time wasted, even if it takes a while to come full circle. Often, we have to lay aside our desires and expectations to serve someone else. We can hold space for God to move when we want to rush ahead. We can submit our ideas and plans and take His on instead. We may not fully see the impact of obedience, but, it is always worth the sacrifice.

We will never be perfect on this side of Heaven, but we will receive an eternal reward if we don’t give up. We don’t have to be right or justified, we just need to follow Jesus.

Sanctification often involves serving other people, which helps refine us. It may include waking early to spend time with the Lord before a busy day at work. It may include tending to the kids and letting your spouse sleep in. Or, maybe it’s praying for that certain person who drives you a little crazy. 🙂

Even recently, I have been learning that I don’t have to figure out what I want to do next in life. I don’t have to worry or try to become a more ‘exciting’ person. This frees me up to let God shine in my life more than my own accomplishments. As John the Baptist said, “He must become greater; I must become less” (John 3:30).

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God, thanks for saving me and preparing me for Heaven. Change my heart, Lord, and make me like You. Holy Spirit, continue to move in my life. Thanks for not giving up on me. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: How are you becoming more like Jesus… today, this week, this month, so far this year?

Tasks: Read Romans 8 and also Romans 12. Instead of running after your dreams and goals, submit them to Jesus. Chase after Him and be transformed.

Posted on in Being Gracious, Kindness, Life is Short, Little Free Library, Miscellaneous, Worship

Everyday Kindness

These days, we find ourselves in a fast-paced, highly politicized world, and we must keep our eyes on Jesus, who is the Way, the Truth, and the Life (John 14:6). It can take a lot of discernment to see where He is working and how I should join Him. Many of the world’s “causes” are important, but I am not called to go and get involved in each one of them.

There are so many issues, and sometimes it feels like I am not doing enough. Have you ever felt that way? Time feels short, and problems accumulate faster than solutions. Often, I feel called to donate money and pray. However, I also keep my eyes and heart open to those who are in need of help and encouragement in my local community.

Every day, God gives us opportunities to share His love with others. Quite often, He does not require big or bold gestures, but simple acts of kindness…

Recently, at work, I heard about a special request. A hospice Veteran with ALS wanted to take a last ride in his son’s convertible. Our VA police helped the Veteran get into the vehicle. He had a look of pure joy. Over a hundred of us lined the front driveway of the VA to cheer and wave to him. It was also funny when people started cheering for the UPS and garbage trucks, too!

The Veteran also had another wish: to travel to Europe. This is a challenging task to accomplish, given his circumstances, but we were able to assist him by using a virtual reality headset. I’m sure it made a world of difference to this brave man.

Free Antique Car Mg photo and picture

On Sunday afternoon, my doorbell rang unexpectedly. I almost didn’t answer because I thought it was simply a routine package delivery. I’m glad I did because I met a family of four siblings. The kids asked to use my garden hose to fill up their water balloons. At first, I was skeptical, but then I realized they did not have access to a hose at their apartment building.

On the one hand, it is not my responsibility to provide for them, but a few gallons of water is not too much to pay to be a good neighbor. English might be their second language, so I want to make sure they feel safe and welcome. As we talked, I learned their ages range from second to ninth grade. I did not get many details, but I sent them home with their water balloons and some other water toys. If they come back, maybe I will offer them a popsicle!

Yesterday, I made Lydia and her friend frozen pizza and fruit for an impromptu dinner before loading her bike into my car and driving her home. An enterprising young neighbor also sold me a little bracelet to earn some money to fix up his bike.

Free Colorful Colourful photo and picture

For many years, I have had a Little Free Library in my front yard. On Monday, I chatted with a couple of ladies and pet their dog. One of them was happy that she had found a paperback of a book she has been listening to. I encouraged them to stop by anytime.

At work, I’ve had several “extra” patients who needed some help. One that stood out was a tube-feeding patient who has had several challenges. He called me with bad news; he is not long for this world. I offered encouragement, yet he is at total peace and is looking forward to seeing Jesus soon. I included that part in my chart note to inform others, per his request, but also to remind them of our eternal hope.

There are times when we need to take a firm stand for what is right. But with everyday kindness, little by little, we can change the world.

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God, thanks for showing me that I am making a difference in the lives of those around me. Thanks for each person listed above and for all of my readers. Help me continue to live for You and share your grace and love with others. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How have you seen God at work this week? What can you do to join Him in blessing others?

Task: Don’t overthink kindness (like I sometimes do). Just start small and offer a smile, a listening ear, or a word of encouragement. It might be making a frozen pizza, contributing to a fundraiser, or offering a popsicle… it all counts!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Travel

Finding Grace #485

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Free Cranesbill Geranium photo and picture

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This week was a great week! We had a perfect mix of hard work and relaxation, rain and sunshine, cooler weather and heat.

On Tuesday, Lydia had volleyball camp and is feeling more comfortable.

I worked two days and then had the rest of the week off! I kept busy at the office but mostly helped my coworkers after I was done with my own patients.

On Wednesday, I was off to prepare for a trip. On Thursday, Juneteenth, I was off anyway, so we flew to Nashville for a family reunion (just a central spot we hadn’t been to yet).

Several people came to the reunion. This includes my dad’s family from all over the US, plus Greece and England. We also invited some sweet Florida friends who have been so kind to our family. The more the merrier! We went downtown, to the Zoo, ate lots of yummy food, played games, and so much more.

Before we left, my washing machine stopped working. I am hoping it is an easy fix, but I could not figure it out. My family offered ideas over the phone, but I ended up asking my neighbor to check it out. However, it will have to wait until next week due to the timing. Thankfully, I have plenty of clothes and towels, so it is not an emergency!

Yesterday, several parts of North Dakota had tornadoes. I don’t know all the details but there were some damages and a few deaths. So sad. I am grateful for my neighbors watching my house and glad we were safe (far away).

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Personality

Introverts and Ice Cream

A few days ago, I watched a social media post for introverts about how to meet people. It was so funny, and I laughed when Kelsey Pomeroy said, “Stop trying to make the friends, and let the friends make you. Set yourself up to be claimed, adopted, and befriended by an extrovert…”

Her idea was that introverts can “advertise” their interests to find people with whom they can connect. For instance, you may carry a book on a topic you like; people who enjoy that book might want to talk about it. You could wear a shirt representing your favorite sports team or put stickers on your water bottle to find like-minded people.

We all give off signals, but we may not be aware of what messages we are sending. Putting headphones in says you don’t want to talk, while making eye contact and smiling implies you are open and available.

Free Ice Cream Ice Cream Cone photo and picture

I am an introvert — I am not shy or socially awkward. I love getting to know people on a deeper level, but sadly, it can be difficult since people don’t take the time to have deeper conversations. I am quiet and appreciate calm places without excess noise or commotion (like really loud music, flashy lights, or crazy traffic). I am happy to be out of the spotlight, but the flip side is that I must guard against feeling unimportant, overlooked, or forgotten. 

Don’t feel sorry for me, I am okay with it! In fact, I have a deal with God. He directs my steps, and I go where He leads. If He has something for me to do, I don’t want to miss it. But, if He doesn’t tell me to get involved, I can do what I want… I can go home, lol!

I love solitude and can easily stay by myself for a couple of days. (I am totally fine when Lydia is at camp or out with others!) The key difference is that I also like being around people. Sometimes, I will go to the mall or bookstore to make sure I don’t isolate myself too much.

Because I am content to chill on my own without much fanfare, sometimes I have to push myself to join a group event. If I am excited for an activity, then nothing will stop me. But, if I am on the fence, a personal invitation is the golden ticket! I feel included and already have a friend! In some cases, I give myself an out: If no one invites me and I don’t really want to go, then I am off the hook!

Free Ice Dessert photo and picture

Still, there are plenty of times I need to go somewhere and don’t know anyone. In those situations, I make up my mind to get through it and find someone who may need some help or encouragement. I specifically make eye contact and smile to make sure I am approachable. I go with a servant heart and try to be the friend I’d like to have.

I also find if I am included in the planning of an event, then I feel more comfortable. This is probably because I know what to expect, but I also try to make others navigate the situation.

At work, I have no problems, as our culture is to greet each other in the halls. I meet new patients all throughout the week. We already have a set topic to discuss, but I invite them into my office and jump right in!

As you may guess, Lydia is a lot like me. As such, I can guide her on how to avoid some classic pitfalls. Last night, I dropped her off at a 1.5-hour volleyball camp, and she was so nervous! I prayed for her but knew exactly how she felt. Thankfully, she came home saying she was glad she went. We talked about being introverts while enjoying some ice cream. I’m so glad I could share more about how God made us. There are challenges, but pushing through the awkwardness is still important!

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Father God, thanks for making me according to Your purpose and plan. My identity is found in You. Thanks for helping me confidently move forward and serve others. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Do you find it easy or difficult to make friends?

Task: If you are an introvert, try subtly advertising your interests. Who knows, you might find a new bestie! Remember to make eye contact and smile. When in doubt, keep your eyes open to see if you can encourage someone. Most introverts are really good at that!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Personality, Wisdom, Worship

When You Feel Like An Appendix

Have you been ‘feeling like an appendix’ lately? Yes, the little organ we don’t quite understand! There is still a lot of scientific debate about the role of the appendix in the body. Spiritually, the Church is called the Body of Christ, and the ‘mouth’ and ‘hands’ often get a lot more attention, unlike those working behind the scenes.

Feeling like an appendix is my description for how it feels when it seems no one gets me. 😅 I may refer to it when I feel a little lost or forgotten. You, too, may feel like a footnote or an unread supplement at the end of a book (another appendix!). But take heart. God notices. He has a good plan and purpose for you!

Free Bread Baked photo and picture

Next time you feel like an appendix, check out the end of 1 Chronicles 23, which explains the Levites’ duties. Verses 28-31 are below.

“The duty of the Levites was to help Aaron’s descendants in the service of the temple of the Lord: to be in charge of the courtyards, the side rooms, the purification of all sacred things and the performance of other duties at the house of God. 29 They were in charge of the bread set out on the table, the special flour for the grain offerings, the thin loaves made without yeast, the baking and the mixing, and all measurements of quantity and size. 30 They were also to stand every morning to thank and praise the Lord. They were to do the same in the evening 31 and whenever burnt offerings were presented to the Lord on the Sabbaths, at the New Moon feasts and at the appointed festivals. They were to serve before the Lord regularly in the proper number and in the way prescribed for them.”

I have read (or skimmed?) these words before, but they stood out to me this time. I saw that basically, the Levites here, who helped their priestly relatives, were in charge of cleaning and baking for the Temple every day!

Sure, they also worshipped God, taught His word, and acted as guards, among other things, but many likely did rather mundane work. It was not always exciting or glamorous, but they were called and set apart for sacred things. It truly must have been an honor, but also a little boring sometimes. Still, their work was important and would have been missed if they stopped.

In fact, without the daily routines of cleaning and baking, the Temple sacrifices would not run smoothly, which would affect the entire nation’s worship and relationship with God!

I find reading about the Levites’ work fascinating and even a little freeing. Surely, God noticed their work, and He notices yours and mine. That said, it is good for me to exhibit humility regardless of my actions. This has been described as not thinking less of myself, but thinking of myself less! It’s not all about me!

Today, you might feel like an appendix or an afterthought, overlooked and underwhelmed. You might be tasked with childcare, caring for elderly parents, making meals, mowing the lawn, paying bills, meeting deadlines, etc., not to mention keeping up with other commitments outside the home. 

Yet, we can humbly and cheerfully do our best and find joy in our tasks, knowing it all matters. God notices and loves you dearly! Indeed, we should work not for human praise, but to please Him. He is the One who calls us, sets us apart, and makes all things right.

So, let’s worship and serve God wholeheartedly and with joy. Our efforts sometimes feel thankless, but we can’t live by our feelings. God will reward your faithfulness one day. Don’t give up!

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God, thanks for Your love and grace! Thanks for seeing me and calling me to serve You. Help me not get stuck in self-pity. Help me do my best and keep moving forward. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: When did you last feel like an ‘appendix’? What did you do about it?

Tasks: Read more about the Levites and know you are not alone. Set realistic expectations and adjust your attitude, if needed. Give it all to God, and remember… His calling and purpose for your life are good!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Prayer, Travel, Wisdom, Worship

Trusting When We Cannot See

This season is full of opportunities to trust God. Often, we have to make a decision when we don’t know the full picture of what He is doing. It seems God asks us to trust Him at a new level every so often (if not daily). Yet, we don’t have to lay aside our questions or logic. Trusting God does not mean ‘blind faith.’ We may not fully see what He is doing, but we can see that He has a good track record!

We can trust everything He does. Even when we can’t quite see the full picture in our own lives, we can trace His faithfulness through Scripture. The main thing is not to get stuck on our questions or logic… in order to trust, we still have to take action!

Free Building Porch photo and picture

“When you can’t see God’s hand, trust His heart.” — Emily P. Freeman

I came across this quote again recently, and it struck me a little differently than before. Previously, I focused on the word hand in terms of a physical body part. This time, however, I thought of a deck of cards, where hands are dealt. Depending on the game played, we may not see all the cards at once! God does not play games with our hearts, and we can trust His. 

God also doesn’t ask us to trust Him for no reason. He loves us and has the best things in store for us. As we see in Ephesians 2:10 (NIV), “…we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” We just have to walk them out. 

God continually shows me His faithfulness. Yesterday marked two months since my mom finished her race and entered Heaven. It has been difficult, but I am grateful that people are still encouraging us, especially my dad. Thank you!!

Free Door Building photo and picture

Lydia is going on a school trip to Washington, DC, next week, and although it was my idea to send her, I need to trust God for her safety, health, provision, etc. I know she will have a great time and will make many memories as she spreads her wings. Thankfully, she already has experience traveling and being apart from me, thanks to summer camp the last few years.

I am also trusting God with summer plans and some opportunities in the fall. Remember, I am a planner and like to get my ducks in a row! But, sometimes, I just have to wait and have faith. In time, I will know more details. God always provides them on time, though in my humanity, I like to know early! 🙂

This season, I am reminded of how God cares for all His birds. I have woken up to the robins, sparrows, purple house finches, and others singing their songs of praise. I have seen a Northern Flicker grace my yard for a few minutes, too. If they can trust God to provide for them amid the uncertain rain, wind, and various temperatures, then I can too!

While waiting for God, I can worship and keep praying for wisdom and discernment. I can take the first step without worrying about making a mistake. I can rest knowing He will redirect me as needed. I can even “borrow faith” from someone else’s journey until mine strengthens!

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God, thanks for all Your loving care and provision. You are so good to me. Help me trust You more, even in uncertain times. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Where are you in your faith journey? How can you trust God and keep moving forward?

Task: Listen to the song, “Sparrows,” by Cory Asbury. Think about how much God loves you and takes care of you!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fruit, Gratitude, Kindness, Little Free Library, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Personality, Wisdom, Words

Be Kind, Not Just Nice

My mom, Debbie, had what some people have called the face of an angel. Funny, I know! But several people have told me that lately, and Mom also heard that often. 😀 I suppose people think “cherub” when considering the unique shape of her face combined with her cheerful, sunny side! She looked so sweet and nice.

That said, Mom was often vocal about things that mattered to her. Not content just to talk, she often got involved, too! She volunteered at various places, including women’s shelters and pregnancy centers. She loved being hands-on.

For instance, Mom volunteered at our local schools for many years as a “mother helper,” even after her kids were out of those grades. Perhaps she was most passionate about listening to kids practice their reading. She patiently would help them “sound it out,” and she would call out their other strengths. In some ways, she was the parent they needed at the time. One boy struggled throughout school and did not seem to have much support at home. But, he always reminded himself that Mrs. Yeagle believed in him. As an adult, he later tracked Mom down to thank her for the difference she made in his life. He didn’t know how he would’ve made it otherwise.

Volunteering is good and nice—absolutely. Being community-focused is vital. But there is a difference between being nice and being kind.

Romans 2:4 explains that “the kindness of God leads us to repentance.” Mom demonstrated this whenever “Debbie Torpedo” came around. She wasn’t just nice, she was also kind. She spoke the truth in love so people would change. (Change doesn’t usually occur with badgering and belittling!)

Being nice is not a fruit of the Spirit, but kindness is! An example of being nice is complimenting someone. Kindness is letting them know they have a piece of spinach in their teeth. It is nice to greet someone on a hike. Kindness means telling them they are walking directly toward a tricky drop-off. They may still choose to proceed, but you warned them. More importantly, telling people about Jesus’ love and the consequences of sin can impact their eternity. It is worth the risk!

Mom often influenced other women as they parented their young children. When a mom caved at her child’s whining or temper tantrum, my mom would say, “You wouldn’t let me treat you that way. Why are you letting your three-year-old act like that? Be the parent.” Usually, the woman caught on and learned how to correct her child. Mom would coach her until she was confident, explaining that it is good for children to have boundaries.

The tough love approach can be intimidating sometimes. It takes a lot of courage to speak up! But Mom empowered these ladies to do what was needed. She showed them what they could be, and many of them thanked her later.

As a mother myself, I appreciate good advice. Thankfully, Mom didn’t have to tell me to “be the parent” specifically, but I have seen these situations fester. Over time, a child might stop being invited somewhere if they don’t behave well. This affects their future friendships and opportunities. A child that lacks discipline becomes a hindrance and a liability of sorts. Frankly, they are not fun to be around! So, my mom was doing a kindness in pointing that out to those who would listen.

Bottom line: Being nice is a good start. But niceness is not enough. We must also accept the challenge of being kind.

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God, thanks for Your lovingkindness. Thanks for loving us enough to correct us when we need it. Help us be wise with our words so we may be kind and draw people to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What would it look like for you to speak with kindness today? What if God was only nice to us, not kind? (I find that to be a little scary!)

Tasks: Consider your words before speaking. Think through whether the situation calls for being nice or being kind. If you don’t know, ask the Lord to show you!

 

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Personality, Wisdom, Worship

Defiant Joy

My mom loved a good party! With her magnetic personality, she usually became the social director wherever she went, lol. Like her mother, she enjoyed organizing anything from casual events to formal affairs. But mostly, she enjoyed having fun!

Mom spread joy through classy decor, delicious food, and laughter with her sense of humor. She bought colored tablecloths before they were even a thing. Her centerpieces might include candles, colored gems, marbles, balloons, and/or beautiful floral bouquets. She taught us to wrap up silverware and added a little flare with colored curling ribbon. Music typically set the mood, at least for home parties.

Mom knew how to elevate basic, everyday foods. She was known for her spaghetti sauce, beef stew, potato leek soup, barbecue, egg rolls, and chicken salad. Her infamous relish tray with celery, baby carrots, red grapes, sweet pickles, and olives was a standard we still replicate. She would even “doctor up” mundane foods with fresh ingredients, like fruits or vegetables—anything to add color, flavor, and nutrition.

Everyone was welcome at mom’s events. She wanted to include everyone because she saw their inherent God-given value. She had her own opinions and convictions, but she looked past differences to see the individual.

Mom was bold and generous toward others. She loved shopping for good deals, partly, so she could give away what she bought. She had a little stockpile of things at home and was always prepared with a gift. Mom often interacted with total strangers at the grocery store, gas station, airport, bank, etc. She would notice something special about them and mention it. She asked good questions and connected them with resources, if warranted. 

Mom loved a good outfit accessory. She loved jewelry, sunglasses, hats, scarves, and purses. But, she didn’t hold onto anything too tightly. She often gave away personal items as she felt led in the moment. For example, if you told her you liked her necklace or bracelet, chances were she might just give it to you.

For someone who just met her, it would be easy to assume my mom was only surface-level or light-hearted all the time. Nothing could be further from the truth. While Mom attracted people with her bubbly personality, she could go deep.

Free Cookie Cookies photo and picture

Mom’s personal motto was “Never a dull moment.” She faced many personal challenges, losses, and pain, but she learned to trust God’s goodness and provision through the messiness of life. She knew He would continue fighting for her, so she didn’t have to win every battle.

Instead, my mom used her energy and influence to point people to God. Mom knew joy is not based on circumstances, like happiness often is. Joy is based on knowing the contagious, steadfast love of Jesus. Indeed, He was the most joyful person ever!

This week, I came across a funny video of my mom. It was from her last birthday in October, and I loved hearing her joy and laughter. I imagine her experiencing Heaven the same way. Although I am grieving, I don’t want to miss the chance to celebrate God’s goodness. Indeed, I don’t have to have all the answers to trust Jesus and walk in faith.

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Heavenly Father, thanks for the beauty and joy You instill into our daily lives. Show us Your glory! Help us take advantage of the opportunities You give us and draw closer to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How can you live with defiant joy today, however trying your circumstances? What are you grateful for?

Tasks: Join me in carrying on my mom’s legacy of defiant joy. There is always a reason to be grateful and celebrate! Nice weather, all green traffic lights, met a goal, received a compliment, ate delicious food? Buy yourself some flowers or dance around while praising God! Read this fun throwback about my mom’s epic 60th birthday party.

Posted on in Being Gracious, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Personality, Wisdom, Words

Debbie Torpedo

Well, it’s been about a week and a half since my mom, Debbie, went to Heaven. I miss her so much and know I’m not the only one. She was like a mother figure to many people. Mom took many people under her wing and encouraged them. She was gifted at identifying their strengths and helping them grow into who God made them to be.

My family has received many messages from people about how Mom changed the course of their family’s life. She taught a friend to pray in public; now that friend’s son is a pastor. Mom challenged another woman to love her husband by making time for him. That marriage has never been stronger. Mom mentored many and called us all a little higher.

Mom knew how to get right to the heart of the matter. Although she sometimes spoke harsh truths, she did it with love and grace. Her conviction was always mixed with witty charm. I don’t know anyone else who could do that like she did!


Most of us would just keep quiet despite seeing a glaringly obvious problem in someone else. Not Mom. If she loved you, she would not let it go. She would speak up so you could make it right. She was a force, but came from a place of love. Mom wanted the best for and expected the best from her friends and family.

Mom did not worry whether someone liked her. She gave tons of compliments but would also risk telling someone the truth. She did not do it to demean or gloat, but to correct an error. In essence, she loved you too much to leave you that way.

Mom looked sweet, but she could pack a wallop when needed. One of her favorite lines was, “Don’t let the freckles fool you!” Similarly, a dear family friend called her “Debbie Torpedo”—because you never saw it coming!

If you’ve experienced “being laid flat” as I like to say, I’m happy to report that God really refined my Mom over many decades of walking with Him. When I was little, she was still working on controlling her fiery temper… So, I know how it feels! But, as my parents and siblings often discussed later as adults, it was just the forge we needed.

Mom and Dad didn’t set out to raise weak kids who would flounder in the real world. My parents have been through some tough circumstances, and they wanted to prepare us. So they taught us first about Jesus and second about showing up and doing hard things. They promoted independence and standing on our own two feet.


My parents held us to high standards and expected us to rise to that level. For every gift we received, we wrote a thank you note. She would tear it up if it weren’t “thankful enough” or legible, and we would have to start over. We can laugh about it now, but there were many tears. 😉

Mom and Dad didn’t ask us to do anything they weren’t already doing. They lead by example. Mom was well known for writing cards to people. She cultivated this discipline over decades. When her arthritis flared up and she was in so much pain (often daily), she would reach out and bless others.

Indeed, I have learned so much from my mom. At the end of her life (though we did not see it coming), Mom, aka “Debbie Torpedo” still had some of that fire, yet her faith in Jesus tempered it. She was born a fighter, but He made her into a warrior. She did not blame Jesus for the pain or complain about it. She praised Him and blessed others. That’s an example worth following!

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God, You are so good and wise. Thanks for working in each of our lives and transforming us. May we submit to You and use our strengths for Your glory. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions:  Have you ever had someone speak a harsh truth to you? Was it done in love or spite? Did you resist change or did you grow through the process?

Task: If you want to read my mom’s obituary but haven’t, here it is.