Finding Grace #484

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Free Rose Geranium Pelargonium photo and picture

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This week flew by!

Work went well, and God helped me get everything done. Most of what I do with my time is out of my hands. I see patients and teach classes as scheduled, but I also answer calls and see walk-ins occasionally. So, any “downtime” is spent charting and catching up, unless I have meetings or other obligations. For the last month, I’ve had computer issues, and this week, I got a new work laptop. I’m very grateful and was able to complete my to-do list more quickly!!

Tuesday was a bit of a wild card. I woke up really dizzy and nauseous with a headache. I  needed to stay home from work, but still had to get Lydia to an afternoon orthodontic appointment. I was feeling about 80% better (and not dizzy) by then, so it turned out fine. That evening, she also went to volleyball camp, and I finally had full relief of my symptoms!

Today, I enjoyed chatting with my dad on the phone. He was doing little projects around the house to honor my mom’s memory. After that, Lydia and I mowed the lawn. It was a little cloudy, but it always feels good to get it done. Then, we did a few chores and read.

**********

These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Microwave Christians

I was reviewing some notes on my phone yesterday and found a few comments I saved for later. These were some things I discussed with my dad in February, when Lydia and I visited my parents one week before my mom died.

We were eating dinner one night at Cracker Barrel. We weren’t too hungry, but I wanted to make sure Dad had something good to eat. He was tired from weeks of being stretched, and we were trying to make sense of the situation. Over biscuits and cornbread, we talked about how we need to lean on God and trust Him during trials.

Dad mentioned how many Jesus followers are “microwave Christians” in that they have no patience and want life to go their way, right away. Ding! But we can’t get by just pressing buttons and hoping for the best. God calls us to go deeper with Him.

Free Marguerite Close Up photo and picture

Then, we compared other kitchen gadgets and how they take a long time to work, but accomplish much more satisfying results. A “pressure cooker Christian” develops an intensity during trials. It’s extreme but yields a tender heart, pliable for doing God’s work. A “rotisserie Christian” may face the same situation repeatedly, always coming back around. But, those trials also serve their purpose: a softened heart understands God’s grace and can nourish others in the Truth.

We could make other parallels, such as a “crockpot Christian” or an “oven-baked Christian.” Haha, maybe not! If anything, these are best seen as we marinate or stew in God’s goodness. In doing so, we let Him have His way in our lives, slowly and steadily waiting for Him.

Also, don’t get me started on a “deep-fat-fryer Christian!” As a Registered Dietitian, I’d recommend an air-fryer and using minimal oil, if any at all! 😉

Looking at this another way, we see that very few things in Nature happen quickly. Mammals tend to have a long gestation period before the baby is born. Flowers take days and weeks to grow leaves and stems before blooming. Trees grow only one ring each year. Good things take time!

Overall, we can see that in trials, we need to settle in for the long haul, becoming all God has for us. As Dad said, “How will you learn to wait upon the Lord, if you don’t ever have to wait upon the Lord? Or, how will you learn to persevere in faith, if your faith is never tested?”

We can’t run away or bypass trials. We can’t just push the “easy button.” With God’s help, we can bear up under the weight of our trials and choose to be cheerful in affliction…

Trials are a guaranteed part of life. Romans 5:3-5 (NIV) says, “…we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

I also love James 1:4-5 (NIV), which says,Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

Today, resist acting like a microwave Christian and settle into God’s mercy, grace, and provision. He is faithful and more than able to bring you through… until Christ is formed in you (Galatians 4:19).

**********

God, thanks for being with us in trials. May we grow in perseverance, character, and hope so we can be mature in Christ, lacking nothing. May we yield to the Holy Spirit as He refines us! In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Which kitchen tool do you identify with the most, based on the explanation above? How can you trust God more as you face trials?

Tasks: Consider how your current circumstances are growing you and making you more like Jesus. Pray for wisdom and strength, and be prepared to dig deep!

Introverts and Ice Cream

A few days ago, I watched a social media post for introverts about how to meet people. It was so funny, and I laughed when Kelsey Pomeroy said, “Stop trying to make the friends, and let the friends make you. Set yourself up to be claimed, adopted, and befriended by an extrovert…”

Her idea was that introverts can “advertise” their interests to find people with whom they can connect. For instance, you may carry a book on a topic you like; people who enjoy that book might want to talk about it. You could wear a shirt representing your favorite sports team or put stickers on your water bottle to find like-minded people.

We all give off signals, but we may not be aware of what messages we are sending. Putting headphones in says you don’t want to talk, while making eye contact and smiling implies you are open and available.

Free Ice Cream Ice Cream Cone photo and picture

I am an introvert — I am not shy or socially awkward. I love getting to know people on a deeper level, but sadly, it can be difficult since people don’t take the time to have deeper conversations. I am quiet and appreciate calm places without excess noise or commotion (like really loud music, flashy lights, or crazy traffic). I am happy to be out of the spotlight, but the flip side is that I must guard against feeling unimportant, overlooked, or forgotten. 

Don’t feel sorry for me, I am okay with it! In fact, I have a deal with God. He directs my steps, and I go where He leads. If He has something for me to do, I don’t want to miss it. But, if He doesn’t tell me to get involved, I can do what I want… I can go home, lol!

I love solitude and can easily stay by myself for a couple of days. (I am totally fine when Lydia is at camp or out with others!) The key difference is that I also like being around people. Sometimes, I will go to the mall or bookstore to make sure I don’t isolate myself too much.

Because I am content to chill on my own without much fanfare, sometimes I have to push myself to join a group event. If I am excited for an activity, then nothing will stop me. But, if I am on the fence, a personal invitation is the golden ticket! I feel included and already have a friend! In some cases, I give myself an out: If no one invites me and I don’t really want to go, then I am off the hook!

Free Ice Dessert photo and picture

Still, there are plenty of times I need to go somewhere and don’t know anyone. In those situations, I make up my mind to get through it and find someone who may need some help or encouragement. I specifically make eye contact and smile to make sure I am approachable. I go with a servant heart and try to be the friend I’d like to have.

I also find if I am included in the planning of an event, then I feel more comfortable. This is probably because I know what to expect, but I also try to make others navigate the situation.

At work, I have no problems, as our culture is to greet each other in the halls. I meet new patients all throughout the week. We already have a set topic to discuss, but I invite them into my office and jump right in!

As you may guess, Lydia is a lot like me. As such, I can guide her on how to avoid some classic pitfalls. Last night, I dropped her off at a 1.5-hour volleyball camp, and she was so nervous! I prayed for her but knew exactly how she felt. Thankfully, she came home saying she was glad she went. We talked about being introverts while enjoying some ice cream. I’m so glad I could share more about how God made us. There are challenges, but pushing through the awkwardness is still important!

**********

Father God, thanks for making me according to Your purpose and plan. My identity is found in You. Thanks for helping me confidently move forward and serve others. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Do you find it easy or difficult to make friends?

Task: If you are an introvert, try subtly advertising your interests. Who knows, you might find a new bestie! Remember to make eye contact and smile. When in doubt, keep your eyes open to see if you can encourage someone. Most introverts are really good at that!

Finding Grace #481

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Free Pansy Purple photo and picture

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This went so well, and it was all because of Jesus. On Monday, I had a heart-to-heart chat with Him and asked Him for help. He came through like He always does!

All week, I was swamped with work. I had many patients, but I also needed to catch up on charting from last week. I also had to complete my Monday and Tuesday notes before the long holiday. Plus, I had three competencies and quizzes to finish. I kept checking in with God and didn’t let myself get too stressed. I was calm and expectant and tried not to panic as the week went on! I raced to finish before my tour ended on Friday, and I finally clicked the last thing just as my shift was done. It was amazing, and I am so grateful!

Lydia finished seventh grade on Thursday! She also found out she was chosen to be in the chamber orchestra again next year. I am so proud of her hard work. She celebrated with a friend by going to dinner and then watching a baseball game.

I spent the evening mowing. It was a gorgeous day after several days of rain, so it was great to spend the time outside! I was proud of myself for getting it done ahead of the long weekend.

On Friday after work, Lydia went to hang out with another friend, so I went to Barnes and Noble for a coffee and to work on some continuing education. I like going there sometimes to focus. It is quiet, but it also minimizes distractions. I actually sit still and work since I don’t want to leave all my stuff unattended!

Today, we decided to do some cleaning. I enjoy being able to clean without rushing, so I listened to some podcasts and got lost in my dusting and organizing! Lydia did some laundry and cleaned her room. Tonight, we can relax a bit!

**********

These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Twelve Years

This week, I am reflecting on God’s work in my life and how far He has brought me. Tomorrow, May 15th, marks twelve years since Dave went to be with Jesus. His death seems like yesterday, but also a lifetime ago. I have grown so much, but at the same time, I am still finding my way.
The picture below popped up in my memories last night. This was taken the day before Dave came home sick from work, starting our chaotic year (May 2012-May 2013). We both looked so calm, like we didn’t have a care in the world. How quickly that would change!
I’ll take the day off work tomorrow to give myself some space to feel and do whatever is needed. I don’t quite know what I will do yet, but I have some ideas. In the evening, Lydia and I will celebrate Dave’s life with a friend who knew him here. He loved tacos and pizza, so we are planning to get… taco pizza in his honor. 😉 I also have a pretty necklace to give Lydia, keeping up my tradition of making the day something to celebrate, not dread.
Naturally, it is a little bittersweet, but God has been so, so good to me. He has been my Rock and always sees to it that I have what I need. God has given me Lydia, and she is such a gift. He helps me parent her, sometimes in very creative ways! God has provided for me financially through work and other means, and He has given me a solid community of support, both near and far. Thank you!
This week is also tough as we celebrated the first Mother’s Day without my mom. Mom loved Dave as much as she loved my brothers. It brings me comfort knowing they are together again! I am inspired by how they never complained about their agonizing pain or struggle. In both cases, they sought Jesus right up until the end. Although their bodies gave out, they finished their races strong.
We can’t have great victories if we never have a battle, and we can’t celebrate a win if we don’t fight through something first. Life has many unexpected twists and turns, but we can always trust God. None of this is ever easy, but God is always with me. And, if you turn to Him, He will be with you, too!
Of course, we love and miss Dave and Mom so much. Grief is a long-term thing, but it’s hard to stay sad for long when I think about them in Heaven. They are safe, secure, and whole. More alive than ever before. And someday soon, all of God’s plans will fully come together. Those who belong to Jesus in Heaven and on Earth will be reunited. What joy that will be!
**********
Father in Heaven, You have been so, so good to me. Thanks for Your faithfulness and grace. May my life point others to You and bring You glory. Help me keep moving forward. In Jesus’ Name, Amen
Questions: How do you celebrate the memory of those you love who have died? Have you accepted God’s free gift of salvation through Jesus? (Don’t delay, do it today!)
Tasks: Listen to this song, Been So Good,” by Elevation Worship. Take some time to look back on how God has been so good to you. If interested, check out my book!

When You Feel Like An Appendix

Have you been ‘feeling like an appendix’ lately? Yes, the little organ we don’t quite understand! There is still a lot of scientific debate about the role of the appendix in the body. Spiritually, the Church is called the Body of Christ, and the ‘mouth’ and ‘hands’ often get a lot more attention, unlike those working behind the scenes.

Feeling like an appendix is my description for how it feels when it seems no one gets me. 😅 I may refer to it when I feel a little lost or forgotten. You, too, may feel like a footnote or an unread supplement at the end of a book (another appendix!). But take heart. God notices. He has a good plan and purpose for you!

Free Bread Baked photo and picture

Next time you feel like an appendix, check out the end of 1 Chronicles 23, which explains the Levites’ duties. Verses 28-31 are below.

“The duty of the Levites was to help Aaron’s descendants in the service of the temple of the Lord: to be in charge of the courtyards, the side rooms, the purification of all sacred things and the performance of other duties at the house of God. 29 They were in charge of the bread set out on the table, the special flour for the grain offerings, the thin loaves made without yeast, the baking and the mixing, and all measurements of quantity and size. 30 They were also to stand every morning to thank and praise the Lord. They were to do the same in the evening 31 and whenever burnt offerings were presented to the Lord on the Sabbaths, at the New Moon feasts and at the appointed festivals. They were to serve before the Lord regularly in the proper number and in the way prescribed for them.”

I have read (or skimmed?) these words before, but they stood out to me this time. I saw that basically, the Levites here, who helped their priestly relatives, were in charge of cleaning and baking for the Temple every day!

Sure, they also worshipped God, taught His word, and acted as guards, among other things, but many likely did rather mundane work. It was not always exciting or glamorous, but they were called and set apart for sacred things. It truly must have been an honor, but also a little boring sometimes. Still, their work was important and would have been missed if they stopped.

In fact, without the daily routines of cleaning and baking, the Temple sacrifices would not run smoothly, which would affect the entire nation’s worship and relationship with God!

I find reading about the Levites’ work fascinating and even a little freeing. Surely, God noticed their work, and He notices yours and mine. That said, it is good for me to exhibit humility regardless of my actions. This has been described as not thinking less of myself, but thinking of myself less! It’s not all about me!

Today, you might feel like an appendix or an afterthought, overlooked and underwhelmed. You might be tasked with childcare, caring for elderly parents, making meals, mowing the lawn, paying bills, meeting deadlines, etc., not to mention keeping up with other commitments outside the home. 

Yet, we can humbly and cheerfully do our best and find joy in our tasks, knowing it all matters. God notices and loves you dearly! Indeed, we should work not for human praise, but to please Him. He is the One who calls us, sets us apart, and makes all things right.

So, let’s worship and serve God wholeheartedly and with joy. Our efforts sometimes feel thankless, but we can’t live by our feelings. God will reward your faithfulness one day. Don’t give up!

**********

God, thanks for Your love and grace! Thanks for seeing me and calling me to serve You. Help me not get stuck in self-pity. Help me do my best and keep moving forward. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: When did you last feel like an ‘appendix’? What did you do about it?

Tasks: Read more about the Levites and know you are not alone. Set realistic expectations and adjust your attitude, if needed. Give it all to God, and remember… His calling and purpose for your life are good!

Trusting When We Cannot See

This season is full of opportunities to trust God. Often, we have to make a decision when we don’t know the full picture of what He is doing. It seems God asks us to trust Him at a new level every so often (if not daily). Yet, we don’t have to lay aside our questions or logic. Trusting God does not mean ‘blind faith.’ We may not fully see what He is doing, but we can see that He has a good track record!

We can trust everything He does. Even when we can’t quite see the full picture in our own lives, we can trace His faithfulness through Scripture. The main thing is not to get stuck on our questions or logic… in order to trust, we still have to take action!

Free Building Porch photo and picture

When you can’t see God’s hand, trust His heart. — Emily P. Freeman

I came across this quote again recently, and it struck me a little differently than before. Previously, I focused on the word hand in terms of a physical body part. This time, however, I thought of a deck of cards, where hands are dealt. Depending on the game played, we may not see all the cards at once! God does not play games with our hearts, and we can trust His. 

God also doesn’t ask us to trust Him for no reason. He loves us and has the best things in store for us. As we see in Ephesians 2:10 (NIV), “…we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” We just have to walk them out. 

God continually shows me His faithfulness. Yesterday marked two months since my mom finished her race and entered Heaven. It has been difficult, but I am grateful that people are still encouraging us, especially my dad. Thank you!!

Free Door Building photo and picture

Lydia is going on a school trip to Washington, DC, next week, and although it was my idea to send her, I need to trust God for her safety, health, provision, etc. I know she will have a great time and will make many memories as she spreads her wings. Thankfully, she already has experience traveling and being apart from me, thanks to summer camp the last few years.

I am also trusting God with summer plans and some opportunities in the fall. Remember, I am a planner and like to get my ducks in a row! But, sometimes, I just have to wait and have faith. In time, I will know more details. God always provides them on time, though in my humanity, I like to know early! 🙂

This season, I am reminded of how God cares for all His birds. I have woken up to the robins, sparrows, purple house finches, and others singing their songs of praise. I have seen a Northern Flicker grace my yard for a few minutes, too. If they can trust God to provide for them amid the uncertain rain, wind, and various temperatures, then I can too!

While waiting for God, I can worship and keep praying for wisdom and discernment. I can take the first step without worrying about making a mistake. I can rest knowing He will redirect me as needed. I can even “borrow faith” from someone else’s journey until mine strengthens!

**********

God, thanks for all Your loving care and provision. You are so good to me. Help me trust You more, even in uncertain times. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Where are you in your faith journey? How can you trust God and keep moving forward?

Task: Listen to the song, “Sparrows,” by Cory Asbury. Think about how much God loves you and takes care of you!

Grace and Faith Alone

Today, I am back in Galatians, journibling’ my way through the book! It’s taken me longer than it should, but I am now in the first section of Chapter 3, where the theme is discussing faith in Jesus versus works. There’s something about writing God’s Word slowly and intentionally that makes you notice things more.

I appreciate the bigger picture and see how it ties into daily life. For instance, I have been watching many short videos about Jewish believers in Jesus (Messianic Jews) sharing their testimonies of faith. They are physical descendants of Abraham, but now they share his spiritual inheritance, too. We Gentiles (non-Jews) are also invited and grafted into God’s family through faith in Jesus. Thank You, Lord!

Truly, no amount of works (things we do) can earn us salvation. It is only because of Jesus’ bloody death on the Cross that we can come to God! Our hope is in Jesus Christ alone, by grace alone, through faith alone.

Free Stone Stairs Medieval photo and picture

Recently, I was reminded yet again of the back-and-forth we feel when it comes to faith versus fear. I know I am not alone in this!

A few weeks ago at church, someone announced a special training opportunity. The concept has been on my heart for a while, but I was unsure about the details. I found a friend who knew more and asked her about it, but her answer was not definitive. I put it out of my mind, thinking I would let it pass.

For some time, God has been telling me NOT to put more on my schedule. I’ve said ‘no’ to a lot of things so I can have some flexibility. I thought it was just for Lydia, but perhaps it was for my Mom, too. And maybe now, it is so I can say ‘yes’ to this new thing…

Free Stairs Stages photo and picture

Well, I got a personal invitation yesterday and signed up for the informational meeting. It is not a full commitment, but I hope to learn more and see if it is a good fit. On my way home after work, I prayed about it more. I simply reminded the Lord of what was on my heart, but that it could be more involved than I have the time or capacity for. As I was talking it out, surprisingly, I answered my own doubts with solutions. “But, God, You already know all this. My time is Yours, my life is Yours. If this is from You, You will help me do it.”

I shared this with Lydia when I got home, and she was really proud of me! She told me she wanted me to go through with it and thought she already told me! I don’t recall that, lol! It might just be more confirmation; either way, it feels good to see God moving, and I just want to stay in tune with Him.

Now, instead of being nervous, I am excited! I don’t know how it will turn out, but I will just take the next step. Indeed, living by faith is the only way to live. We cannot do anything on our own, nor were we created to do it all solo. God came up with the plan, Jesus showed us how to do it, and the Holy Spirit empowers us. We aren’t responsible for results, but just showing up and bringing our best. What a relief!

**********

Heavenly Father, thanks for calling us with purpose! Help us to listen and honor You with everything we do. Give us wisdom to know what to do and the courage to do it. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Are you on the fence about doing something God has called you to do? How can you take the first step?

Task: Read more about writing God’s Word and my other experiences with Journibles in John (here) and Ruth (here).

 

The Heart of the Matter

The week before she died, Lydia and I visited Mom and Dad in Florida. I’ll be forever grateful to the Lord for those four days together. One day, in a brief moment of reflection, Mom mentioned how each of her kids is like her in certain ways.

Her words felt somewhat like a blessing, so I committed them to memory: Mom looked at me and said, “Livi, is bold and strong, but kind. Patrick, he’s got my sense of humor. Now, Micah is the most like me. Not much gets in his way. But you, you have my heart.”

It is cool to see how my parents’ traits are spread across each of us. We all love learning and are uniquely creative. We all rise to the occasion and use our strengths to help people. Let me explain… I’m the second oldest, but I’ll write about myself last.

To start, the picture above is one of my favorites. It was taken right before Dave and I (right) moved to Fargo in 2010. We were so young, lol! Up top is Patrick, then Olivia, and Micah, next to me.

Olivia is the firstborn and a great leader. Livi always went before us and prepared the way. Even now, she can pull the ‘big sister’ card, and we all fall in line. She also didn’t balk too much when I tagged along. She has always been gracious and patient with me!

Coming in third, Patrick is so funny. He clearly has my mom’s quick wit and way with words. Pat is full of one-liners and movie quotes. Pat is super smart but humble. He can be serious and deep, but we all appreciate his lighthearted joy. 

My youngest brother, Micah, has the best mix of Mom’s fire and Dad’s drive. As a classic strong-willed child, he most certainly required the most discipline—perhaps more than the three of us older kids combined! Yet, this has served him well, as he is very responsible, playful, and a good friend. I love seeing how God has matured Micah over time.

I am perhaps Mom and Dad’s most compliant one on the surface. Cheerful, quiet, and patient, I’m go-with-the-flow… more cerebral, like Dad. However, internally, I can also be equally stubborn and “particular.” I want to do what is right and will stand on principle! As a child, I was fairly emotional, but I learned to hide my feelings at times. Somehow, I thought showing emotions was a weakness, and I did not fully realize the error until years later when God went to war against all my fears.

Through my grief journey, Mom was impressed by my resilience. Our weaknesses can become great strengths if we let God work in our lives. In my case, I dug deep and clung to Jesus as He remade me! During this time, He graciously showed Mom and me some problems in understanding each other. Our differences were getting the best of us.

God challenged us to get to the heart of the matter. Moving past our annoyances and personality quirks, we soon discovered that we shared the same passion for those in need! Our hearts were one regarding compassion and serving others. We might go about doing things differently, but we often arrived at the same conclusions! Isn’t God good?!

Mom was always quick to tell us how proud she was of us. In the same way, make sure you tell your loved ones how much you appreciate them. Spend time together and challenge each other to grow. Focus on the good, and don’t take your time for granted.

**********

Father God, thanks for all Your blessings. Thanks for challenging us and infusing our weaknesses with Your strength. Give us wisdom and courage as we share Your heart with the World. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Are you more like your mom or your dad… Or, are you a really good blend of their traits? How do you resolve conflicts with others who are different than you?

Tasks: Listen to this song. Thank God for His blessings and favor!

Be Kind, Not Just Nice

My mom, Debbie, had what some people have called the face of an angel. Funny, I know! But several people have told me that lately, and Mom also heard that often. 😀 I suppose people think “cherub” when considering the unique shape of her face combined with her cheerful, sunny side! She looked so sweet and nice.

That said, Mom was often vocal about things that mattered to her. Not content just to talk, she often got involved, too! She volunteered at various places, including women’s shelters and pregnancy centers. She loved being hands-on.

For instance, Mom volunteered at our local schools for many years as a “mother helper,” even after her kids were out of those grades. Perhaps she was most passionate about listening to kids practice their reading. She patiently would help them “sound it out,” and she would call out their other strengths. In some ways, she was the parent they needed at the time. One boy struggled throughout school and did not seem to have much support at home. But, he always reminded himself that Mrs. Yeagle believed in him. As an adult, he later tracked Mom down to thank her for the difference she made in his life. He didn’t know how he would’ve made it otherwise.

Volunteering is good and nice—absolutely. Being community-focused is vital. But there is a difference between being nice and being kind.

Romans 2:4 explains that “the kindness of God leads us to repentance.” Mom demonstrated this whenever “Debbie Torpedo” came around. She wasn’t just nice, she was also kind. She spoke the truth in love so people would change. (Change doesn’t usually occur with badgering and belittling!)

Being nice is not a fruit of the Spirit, but kindness is! An example of being nice is complimenting someone. Kindness is letting them know they have a piece of spinach in their teeth. It is nice to greet someone on a hike. Kindness means telling them they are walking directly toward a tricky drop-off. They may still choose to proceed, but you warned them. More importantly, telling people about Jesus’ love and the consequences of sin can impact their eternity. It is worth the risk!

Mom often influenced other women as they parented their young children. When a mom caved at her child’s whining or temper tantrum, my mom would say, “You wouldn’t let me treat you that way. Why are you letting your three-year-old act like that? Be the parent.” Usually, the woman caught on and learned how to correct her child. Mom would coach her until she was confident, explaining that it is good for children to have boundaries.

The tough love approach can be intimidating sometimes. It takes a lot of courage to speak up! But Mom empowered these ladies to do what was needed. She showed them what they could be, and many of them thanked her later.

As a mother myself, I appreciate good advice. Thankfully, Mom didn’t have to tell me to “be the parent” specifically, but I have seen these situations fester. Over time, a child might stop being invited somewhere if they don’t behave well. This affects their future friendships and opportunities. A child that lacks discipline becomes a hindrance and a liability of sorts. Frankly, they are not fun to be around! So, my mom was doing a kindness in pointing that out to those who would listen.

Bottom line: Being nice is a good start. But niceness is not enough. We must also accept the challenge of being kind.

**********

God, thanks for Your lovingkindness. Thanks for loving us enough to correct us when we need it. Help us be wise with our words so we may be kind and draw people to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What would it look like for you to speak with kindness today? What if God was only nice to us, not kind? (I find that to be a little scary!)

Tasks: Consider your words before speaking. Think through whether the situation calls for being nice or being kind. If you don’t know, ask the Lord to show you!