Category: Perfectionism

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Perseverance, Personality, Pivot, Wisdom

A Few Good Quotes

I usually finish writing my Wednesday post on Tuesday evening, and I usually make it my main priority. But, occasionally, I need to focus on other things. Sometimes, it is just good to take a break and rest. This week has been busy, so it’s a bit of both!

So, for this week’s post, I am keeping it simple. I decided to share a few quotes I have been collecting and just give a few insights and let you mull on them as well! I do not remember all the sources, sorry, but if I find them, I will link them.

The first three are from some excellent sermons on the Armor of God (Ephesians 6:10-18). This is the first in the series, but they have all been good!

Our shield of faith is not just for protection; it is also for advancement. We don’t just hold it up when attacks come, but we can “hide” behind it while taking ground in Jesus’ Name. For me, this is a mental game-changer. It reminds me I have the responsibility to take action.

Faith is acting like God is telling the truth.  Essentially, our enemy’s strategy is to use anything – good or bad – to make us distrust God. (God can use those to bring Him glory and us good.)  So, when we believe God and do what He says, we fight against the lies.

Free Fat Chicken Stonecrop photo and picture

Hope is when your present borrows strength and hope from you future. No matter how grand, the things of this world will always disappoint us. But, Jesus is our Living Hope and our future is secure!

God did not redeem us only to abandon us. I don’t recall the source, but it does remind me of the line, “God did not bring you this far, only to bring you this far.” Lies can creep in and make us doubt God’s love and presence. But, He is with us and for us!

Preach the gospel to yourself daily. Remind yourself that apart from King Jesus, you are dust. Not to be outdone, check out this line, attributed to Jonathan Edwards: “You contribute nothing to your salvation except the sin that made it necessary.” Well, that’s enough to keep me humble!

Slow days still count. I have been staying up late to get things done, and as you know, you can’t do that for long without feeling it. For the last week or so, I have felt a little run-down and have been intentionally trying to rest. I took a nap on Sunday and am being kind to myself by ending my post… here. 😉 Thanks for reading!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for giving us wisdom and guidance. May we live out our faith with boldness. Help us to know when to move forward and when to rest. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: Have you heard any other good quotes lately?

Task: Think about the quotes above and how you might apply them to your life. I’d love to know your thoughts!

Posted on in Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perfectionism, Perseverance, Personality, Pivot, Wisdom, Words

The Heart of the Matter

The week before she died, Lydia and I visited Mom and Dad in Florida. I’ll be forever grateful to the Lord for those four days together. One day, in a brief moment of reflection, Mom mentioned how each of her kids is like her in certain ways.

Her words felt somewhat like a blessing, so I committed them to memory: Mom looked at me and said, “Livi, is bold and strong, but kind. Patrick, he’s got my sense of humor. Now, Micah is the most like me. Not much gets in his way. But you, you have my heart.”

It is cool to see how my parents’ traits are spread across each of us. We all love learning and are uniquely creative. We all rise to the occasion and use our strengths to help people. Let me explain… I’m the second oldest, but I’ll write about myself last.

To start, the picture above is one of my favorites. It was taken right before Dave and I (right) moved to Fargo in 2010. We were so young, lol! Up top is Patrick, then Olivia, and Micah, next to me.

Olivia is the firstborn and a great leader. Livi always went before us and prepared the way. Even now, she can pull the ‘big sister’ card, and we all fall in line. She also didn’t balk too much when I tagged along. She has always been gracious and patient with me!

Coming in third, Patrick is so funny. He clearly has my mom’s quick wit and way with words. Pat is full of one-liners and movie quotes. Pat is super smart but humble. He can be serious and deep, but we all appreciate his lighthearted joy. 

My youngest brother, Micah, has the best mix of Mom’s fire and Dad’s drive. As a classic strong-willed child, he most certainly required the most discipline—perhaps more than the three of us older kids combined! Yet, this has served him well, as he is very responsible, playful, and a good friend. I love seeing how God has matured Micah over time.

I am perhaps Mom and Dad’s most compliant one on the surface. Cheerful, quiet, and patient, I’m go-with-the-flow… more cerebral, like Dad. However, internally, I can also be equally stubborn and “particular.” I want to do what is right and will stand on principle! As a child, I was fairly emotional, but I learned to hide my feelings at times. Somehow, I thought showing emotions was a weakness, and I did not fully realize the error until years later when God went to war against all my fears.

Through my grief journey, Mom was impressed by my resilience. Our weaknesses can become great strengths if we let God work in our lives. In my case, I dug deep and clung to Jesus as He remade me! During this time, He graciously showed Mom and me some problems in understanding each other. Our differences were getting the best of us.

God challenged us to get to the heart of the matter. Moving past our annoyances and personality quirks, we soon discovered that we shared the same passion for those in need! Our hearts were one regarding compassion and serving others. We might go about doing things differently, but we often arrived at the same conclusions! Isn’t God good?!

Mom was always quick to tell us how proud she was of us. In the same way, make sure you tell your loved ones how much you appreciate them. Spend time together and challenge each other to grow. Focus on the good, and don’t take your time for granted.

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Father God, thanks for all Your blessings. Thanks for challenging us and infusing our weaknesses with Your strength. Give us wisdom and courage as we share Your heart with the World. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Are you more like your mom or your dad… Or, are you a really good blend of their traits? How do you resolve conflicts with others who are different than you?

Tasks: Listen to this song. Thank God for His blessings and favor!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fear, Faith, and Moving Forward book, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Fruit, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perfectionism, Pivot, Prayer, Travel, Words, Worship

Finding Grace #455

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Free Forest Path photo and picture

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This week was thankfully less busy than the last two.

Sundays have been more relaxing since we’ve been attending the early church service. We’ve had time to prepare for the next week at a slower pace. It feels like a longer day and I feel more refreshed!

Work was a bit slower, though still steady. I simply had less patients scheduled but still got a lot of things done. It was nice to have a lighter load. As such, I had time to call some extra patients and finish a few small projects.

We received a few inches of snow on Tuesday night and Wednesday. I did a little shoveling but left the main part for the snow service. It is nice to have them come help me, though I still do a fair amount of work throughout the season!

Lydia’s birthday was on Thursday, and she was tickled by the special letter I wrote for her! She wanted to go to dinner and then watch a movie at home with some ice cream. In a way, we have already been celebrating for a week or two. That’s becaue she received various gifts when my mother-in-law visited and through the mail from family.

Friday after work, I ran a few errands and then called my mom to catch up. We had a great time chatting and it is always so encouraging. Later, my dad called to say hi, too. I always appreciate those calls!

Today, we saw Wicked (part 1) at the movie theater. I saw the Broadway production years ago, but it was fun to introduce Lydia to it. In fact, I like Wicked better than the Wizard of Oz! The movie version had some fun cameos and great music. The flying monkeys were still a little scary, though!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Perseverance, Personality, Pivot, Wisdom

Goals Are Only a Guide

Yesterday, we had our annual goals meeting at work. We do this every year, focusing on national and departmental VA goals. The funny thing is, I never really have any goals that match my manager’s expectations. It’s almost a running joke at this point!

This level of goal setting is above and beyond our normal work duties, which are already immense! So, it’s good to challenge ourselves but it’s not the end of the world. I usually offer to help others with their goals, and that is good enough.

It’s not that I don’t have goals – I have lots! I love learning, but not all of my interests are transferrable at work or a good fit for my patients. For instance, I am interested in plant-based diets and would love to promote them more often. Yet, it’s not for everyone, especially a population that is often rural, mostly male, and meat-loving. These guys tend to rely on microwave meals or let their wives do all the cooking.

Also, focusing on my own mobility exercises has been key for me lately, but that’s a bit out of my current scope of practice. Even if I decide to train in this area (a fitness or pain certification to complement my foodie side), I may not be able to apply it as well as I would like. But it’s something I am considering!

Free goal target success illustration

For me, it’s a good sign I don’t want to set excessive goals. I want to do exactly what God is calling me to do. No more and no less. I don’t have to be perfect or overachieve. My top goals are to stay close to Jesus, listen to the Holy Spirit, and bring my Heavenly Father glory through serving and loving others. Everything else is just a bonus! 

God is good at showing me when I need to make a change, personally or professionally. He leads me and is patient with me until I get where I need to be. Therefore, if God Himself is not telling me anything different, I can be at peace. I don’t need to apologize or explain anything. I trust I am on track!

Goals are good, but they are only a guide. They don’t override God’s plan for me!

I always aim to go above and beyond to meet the needs of my patients, even when it is inconvenient. I don’t see that changing any time soon! But, God has given me a lot to do outside of work, too! As a single mom, I need to use my energy wisely.

Free Road Curve photo and picture

Prayerfully, my long-term work goals are fairly simple and have worked well so far!

  1. Eat a good breakfast since I don’t know when I will get to eat my lunch. I always manage to eat, but it’s not always predictable due to patient care.

  2. Show up. There are gonna be days I just don’t “feel” like going to work. Do it anyway. (As it is, I find I am always happier when I go and see people. I hate to miss something important!)

  3. Have a good attitude. Be a team player. Smile! I can encourage those around me, and not complain or drag them down.

  4. Have patience with my patients. Every day is different, and I work with a wide variety of personalities and problems. There are similarities, but there are still so many nuances. I have to bust myths and break through barriers daily!

  5. Do my best and minimize “late notes.” This is more of a behind-the-scenes billing thing, but I can only do my best!

I am beyond grateful for where God has me right now. This time, this space, this routine. My coworkers and family and responsibilities. I know things will change someday, but I am content going at His pace and walking in His peace.

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Heavenly Father, thanks for taking such good care of me. You are so gracious and kind to provide for me and lead me. Help me stay close to You so I can move when You do! In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Do you like setting goals? What goals are you working toward right now?

Task: When setting goals, pray first, then make them SMART! That stands for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-based.

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Kindness, Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Perseverance, Personality, Wisdom

Signs and Signals

I love to shop online, as it is often faster and easier. The items come right to my door! However, I also want to promote local businesses when I can. It is fun to see products in person and pick out the best option. Then, I can decide in the moment if it’s right for me.

Recently, I went to a few stores looking for specific things. I have to admit, I was a little annoyed when I showed up and saw they had summer hours. I have no problem with changing their hours if it is less busy during this season. The issue was that I didn’t know until I showed up! Often, the stores are out of my way, and so it felt like I wasted my time.

I parked, got out of my car, and then walked up to the entrances four separate times (one store twice on different days). That’s when I saw the sign that the stores were closed. I was irked because I looked up their hours online, but they were incorrect.

One of the stores posted that its hours had changed due to a family illness. I understand that, but I hope they can update their website soon and/or find someone to help cover while they heal. Another store has such random hours that it will take me a week to get back there since I work during the day. I took a picture of their sign and could possibly order from them online. But, the shipping costs are more than I want to pay when I could just pick it up.

Free Phone Confused photo and picture

Unfortunately, the signs on the doors did not reflect what I expected when I looked online. This happened all last week, so I started to notice the pattern. It was rather frustrating, though not the worst thing in the world.

I also thought of the signs and signals we portray to others. If we ignore people, they may not want to confide in us. If we grumble and complain, we may not portray our gratitude or the hope we have in Jesus. If we swear and yell at people, we may not reflect the grace God has given us.

Then again, people often make assumptions about each other anyway. We tend to judge and misjudge clothing, cars, lawns, and more! Someone who smiles often could be seen as joyful or like they have no problems! Someone who is quiet could come across as rude, socially awkward, or just shy. That’s why it’s good to try to understand and learn more about one another.

Clearly, we cannot live our lives to please every person we meet. That’s impossible and unnecessary. But, we can consider culture, circumstances, upbringing, personality, and other factors.

Overall, we need to do the best we can to please Jesus. However, it might be worth considering what signs and signals we are giving off. Perceptions are a two-way street! A negative vibe could turn away the very people God wants us to reach. While we can’t be true friends with everyone, we can be friendly and cheerful to anyone we see.

While it is not our job to save everyone, it is wise to connect with as many people as possible so they can meet Jesus, who does the saving! Ultimately, we can listen to the Holy Spirit’s signals and not worry about the rest!

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God, thanks for creating each of us uniquely. Help us grow in knowledge and understanding of those around us. Give us grace for one another. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you ever been misjudged? Was it all on the other person, or was there something in your control, too? Is there any situation you misread and need to reconsider? Is there someone to whom you could extend grace?

Tasks: Pray about your next steps this week. Consider how you can be more open with others and show them God’s grace, too! Forgive those who have misinterpreted your signals, as well!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fruit, Gratitude, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Perseverance, Personality, Pivot, Wisdom

A Secret Weapon

The last couple of weeks have been a bit…maddening. I’ve lost my temper once or twice and been a little grouchy. Some of it could be subconsciously being aware that the eleventh anniversary of Dave’s death is next week. But really, things have just built up.

At home, unexpected issues have popped up, including trouble replacing my screens after getting egged and picking up a ton of dog poop from my yard (though I don’t have a dog). Then, the fence at the edge of my property fell again (after a two-year fight to get it put back up). It’s just been a lot lately.

I’ve been tempted to have a little pity party, thinking things would be easier if Dave were still here. While that may be true, I know life is full of problems, so even then, something else would likely happen unexpectedly! I can be grateful my problems are not worse, and I know many people are facing greater trials.

Work has been busy as usual, too. Good, just not much downtime to think straight. LOL Thus, my patience has been a little short, but I have been trying to bring all these things to Jesus. I talked with my mom yesterday, and she reminded me that His joy is my strength!

“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” — 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, NIV

I recently heard Jesus was the most joyful person who has ever lived. In His presence is fullness of joy (Psalm 16:11)! But He also had a very difficult life. He was born to suffer and die at my expense (and yours!). If Jesus can have abundant joy despite His circumstances, so can I.

Joy is a fruit of the Holy Spirit, which means He wants to grow that in me. The seed has been planted, I just need to cultivate it. This goes for love, peace, patience, etc.

Fruit is meant to be shared with others, to refresh and encourage them, similar to grace. As my mom pointed out, God wants people to see Him in us, so how we display the fruits of the Spirit matters. This is a good reminder to keep looking for ways to serve others and take the focus off myself.

Here are some questions to consider: Do I show joy or grouchiness on my face? Do I bring love and peace to a situation or chaos? Am I loving, kind, and patient even when I don’t get my way? Do I call out the good in others? Do I speak gentle words or bring wrath? Am I faithful even when it costs me? Do I show self-control when life flings out of control?

While I don’t expect my house issues to suddenly disappear, I know they will all work out in time. And I can choose to enjoy life in the meantime. I can find fun and creative things to do, or at least look for ways to bring joy into small moments of my day. Joy is my secret weapon as I stay close to Jesus, for therein lies my strength (Nehemiah 8:10).

When things feel out of control, I will take them to the One who controls the Universe and cares for me infinitely (1 Peter 5:7).

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God, thanks for the fruits of Your Holy Spirit. Specifically, help me cultivate more peace, joy, and patience as I work through these challenges. Thanks for all You do for me. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Out of the nine fruits of the Holy Spirit, which ones do you need to cultivate the most right now?  (Galatians 5:22-23)

Task: Next time you feel bent out of shape, consider why. Do whatever it takes to protect your peace and joy. Remember, people are looking for Jesus in you!

Posted on in Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Personality, Pivot, Wisdom

Finding Grace #426

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Free Sparrow Flowering Branch photo and picture

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This week was a little humbling. It went well overall, like usual, but there were a few things that made me take a second look at my heart.

I won’t go into all the details right now, but let’s just say I lost my temper a couple of times. I spent several hours doing several house projects and yard work. I mowed the yard, set out my deck furniture, swept the garage, and more. I am capable, but this is really not my preferred area of expertise. It all takes a lot of effort and emotional energy.

I also had a challenging meeting at work. I faced a situation where I did my best and did it very well. But, it was suggested I do something else to go in a different direction, which I pointed out really made no difference. It seemed nit-picky, and I was frustrated because there are so many “actually important” things to focus on, like patient care. It turned out well, but afterward, I did a heart check anyway.

I questioned my motives and wondered if I was just having difficulty accepting feedback. But I don’t think that’s it. After some prayer, I realized why I was bothered: I am trying to move away from perfection. So, trying to improve something that really doesn’t need to be fixed seemed futile (there was nothing wrong to begin with!). In all, it was eye-opening for me, and I am glad I spoke up.

This week was also a big week for parenting. Just normal things, nothing too crazy. Lydia is a great kid, and I enforce good boundaries and respect. I am so proud of her and work to shaper her character, which sometimes takes some big discussions and discipline.

Today, Lydia and I put out a few items on the curb for “clean-up week.” A lot of it was good stuff but just not worth keeping or selling. It’s fun to see which items are already gone before garbage day next week! Lydia and I also threw some other items in the attic. She thought the space above the garage was so cool!

Needless to say, it feels like a long week. I took a nice bath and am watching a movie tonight. Thanks, Lord, for Your mercy and grace!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Books and Movies I Like, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Perseverance, Personality, Pivot, Prayer, Wisdom, Worship

Ducks In A Row

Spring means a lot of birds are arriving daily! I have noticed songbirds, geese, and ducks lately. Did you know there are over fifty types of ducks worldwide, including geese and swans? (This site reports 165, to be exact.)

Apparently, there are thirty-three different duck species in the United States. Some are friendly and some are territorial. As a side note, loons are not ducks. Now you know!

Not too long ago, I saw a picture of a duck with seventy-six ducklings following her! This article describes it as a ducky daycare of sorts. That makes me smile just thinking about it!

Just like God cares for the sparrows, he absolutely cares for the ducks, too!

Free Ducks Ducklings photo and picture

When life gets busy, we may say, “I need to get my ducks in row.” This expression suggests that we need to get organized or ensure all the details line up just so. It can be difficult because no one can keep all their ducks in a row for long! The ducks (or tasks) are constantly changing, even if they all cooperate and things go smoothly.

I definitely feel that way sometimes, and I am sure you do, too. I try to bend several ways to accomplish much more than I probably should. Lord help me!

I am listening to John Mark Comer’s book The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry. He writes how hurry and busyness lead to distraction and burnout. We tend to run, run, run, and leave little room for margin.

As Christians, this puts us in a dangerous position because if we are so busy all the time, we don’t take time to check in with God. Doing something FOR God is different than doing it WITH God.

King Saul learned that the difficult way in 1 Samuel 13. His soldiers were afraid and leaving the battle, and Saul got tired of waiting for God’s prophet to come. He took matters into his own hands, and because of his impatience and disobedience, Saul eventually lost everything.

Free Duck Ornithology photo and picture

God’s pace is SLOW compared to the world’s pace. We can only survive spiritually if we roll back the busyness and walk with God at the pace He sets. Not several steps ahead without checking in to see if we are actually supposed to go in that direction.

The author mentioned that God is love, and perfect love takes time. So do joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control. For example, we need to slow down to love people well, enjoy the present moment, and have peace of mind. Helping people or listening to them takes intention. When we are faced with temptation, we are at risk if we jump right in before weighing options.

Slowing down likely means having fewer ducks overall (tasks on my to-do list). I won’t shirk my responsibilities or give away my little duckies, but when it’s time for them to fledge (our time together is complete), I don’t have to get more ducks ‘just because.’ I trust God to help me know what I can handle and what that looks like.

After all, God cares for the ducks, and He cares for me, too. All the world’s ducks are His. And all circumstances and the tasks in my little world are under His guidance, too. Or, at least, they are if I ask for His help and go at His pace!

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God, thanks for the gift of ducks! Thanks for the new life they represent and the joy they bring. Help me submit my daily schedule to you. Give me just the right amount of tasks and help me stay focused on You. I want to walk with You, In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How many “ducks” are you in charge of right now? Is it too much or just enough? Are you trusting God?

Tasks: Let’s honor God by checking in with Him regarding our schedule. We can trust Him to give us just the right amount of ducks. Keep in mind chaos and overwhelm are NOT from Him… don’t beat yourself up if your ducks are running wild. Just bring them to Jesus and let Him help you!

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Perseverance, Personality, Pivot, Prayer, Procrastination, Wisdom, Worship

Living Redeemed

Spring is in the air, and I sense God doing something new! In some ways, I feel like this season has already been drawn out since we had hardly any winter snow. But, I also feel a little behind the game because it is easy to coast along when I am busy with other things. Sometimes, it is nice to have some urgency, and at different times, it is good just to relax. Either way, I am excited to see what God is doing.

On Easter Sunday, Psalm 103:1-5 was shared, and the sermon was about what it means to be redeemed. Essentially, redemption means that a ransom was paid (Jesus’ blood) so we can live freely with new purpose. Living under God’s grace has many benefits, as you can read below:

1 Praise the Lord, my soul;
    all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
2 Praise the Lord, my soul,
    and forget not all his benefits—
3 who forgives all your sins
    and heals all your diseases,
4 who redeems your life from the pit
    and crowns you with love and compassion,
5 who satisfies your desires with good things
    so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.

Free River Stream photo and picture

Below are a few of my notes. I certainly have some thinking to do, but this is a good place to start. I hope you find these points useful and can personalize them for your circumstances! 

As God’s children, we are redeemed from sin, death, and fear. We are given new life and have the freedom to walk it out in faith and Victory. Collectively, we are redeemed to participate in God’s Kingdom and do good works, which He has prepared in advance for us to do (Ephesians 2:10).

But what good works did Jesus redeem me for specifically? They will be unique to me. I have a special purpose and hidden potential. My life belongs to Jesus, and what I do matters, but it will likely look different from everyone else.

What are the consequences of not living my full purpose? What will I miss out on? Who is depending on me to be faithful? Whatever the answer, it affects me, my family, my community, and the Church in general. If I don’t do my part, everything suffers. Jesus already did the main work, but He still has a plan for me to complete. Get going!

Sooo… What am I waiting for? What is holding me back? This could be apathy, rebellion, fear, etc., depending on the situation! It’s definitely worth thinking through and dealing with the root causes. Otherwise, I’ll never get started.

Each of us will have different answers to the questions I listed above. But, it is worth praying about what God wants you to know and do. There is great blessing joy, and peace when we are on His path for us. That doesn’t mean we won’t have a struggle, though!

Living redeemed takes courage, but what an adventure it is! Do your best and focus on progress, not perfection. Remember, we live under God’s abundant grace! He is committed and more than able to complete the good work he started in you (Philippians 1:6).

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Heavenly Father, thanks for redemption, new life, and grace. You are good, and so are your plans for me! Help me understand Your work in my life and how You have equipped me for it. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What do you think God has redeemed you for specifically? Do you anticipate any changes, or are you already where you need to be?

Task: When praying for specific next steps, consider your personality, talents, passion areas, and life experiences. All of these can help determine if you are on the right path.

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perfectionism, Perseverance, Personality, Pivot, Wisdom, Worship

Cornerstone

Lately, I have noticed a subtle shift in my house. It is a good and natural thing, but it has surprised me. I recognized it this week, which helped deal with it. At least for now!

Basically, I have been a little short with Lydia, and it bothered me. She’s a great kid and doesn’t deserve that. I couldn’t figure out the issues until I prayed about it on the way to work Monday.

I think my feelings of frustration were related to a few factors. First, Lydia is growing more independent. So, she wants to have some say in what we do. I also want this for her, but to do that, I need to let go and let her. And that’s complicated sometimes. 🙂

Part of this is related to “puberty brain.” Normally, Lydia is obedient and reliable. But now, she “forgets” to complete tasks or wants to negotiate. That’s fine sometimes, but I put my foot down this past weekend and reset some boundaries. I know this is just the beginning, and communication will morph over the next few years. Again, this is all normal!

Another factor is that I have been the only adult at home for over a decade, which is a lot of responsibility. And, I have expectations about my house and space! Over time, I have taught Lydia to do various household tasks, but if she doesn’t follow through or moves like a sloth, I either have to do it or reinforce it… again. Both take more time and dilegence.

Free Medieval Castle Detail photo and picture

On Monday, I was also nervous about the timing of things at work. I had two complex patients coming on top of my regular patient load. They were expected to come back to back and had a lot of similarities which I needed to keep straight. I lost a little sleep about this, and so I was just a little grumpy with all that on my mind. 😉

Then, before work, I had to remind Lydia to move her shoes after I tripped on them. She knows not to leave them in the middle of the floor. I yelled out of exasperation and had to apologize. It all worked out, but on my way to work, I prayed and asked God to help me readjust… and as soon as I did, He did a little heart work!

On the radio, I heard a few songs, like Tasha Layton’s “Look What You’ve Done.” There’s a line about God tearing all the roots up from our hearts, getting rid of lies and replacing them with His Truth. I envisioned God taking my fears and grumpiness as I soaked up His love for me.

Then, I heard the song, “Cornerstone” by TobyMac. It was a great reminder of what really matters: Jesus. My identity is found in Christ alone, not in if the dishes get done (or if Lydia remembers them or not).

Jesus is my cornerstone, the perfect foundation. My security is found in Him. He is my hope, my joy, my peace. Jesus encompasses all I am, and His expectation is that I walk with Him. His mercy and grace cover all I do. No more, no less.

As Psalm 73:26 says, “My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” Life can quickly change, and no two days are alike. If we let our circumstances or emotions run the show, we’ll keep spiraling out of control. One minute, we are “happy” when things go our way, and the next, we are losing our temper over towels left in the dryer. Ahem.

We can’t always predict how things will go, but we can run to God, who is our Rock. He is strong and steady, a sure place to land. He is the only thing that matters in the end.

I know the Lord will keep working in my heart and household. I have invited Him in and give Him full reign (sometimes hour by hour!). I am excited to see what Jesus does in me and who Lydia becomes in Him.

So today, instead of getting bent out of shape, I will let God shape me. He is the beginning and the end and knows all things. His plans for me are good and trustworthy! He can use any challenge for His purposes. Nothing is impossible for Him!

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God, thanks for being my foundation, my cornerstone. Thanks for the reminder that I am not in control and don’t need to be! Help me trust You more and let You direct my path. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: Are you relying on God to steady you this week? How has He come through for you lately?

Task: Let God strip away everything that is not of Him. It is painful at times, but worth it! Check out this final song I heard on the radio, which helped tie everything together, “One Thing Remains” by Passion ft Kristian Stanfill.