Category: Journey of Grace

Perspective on our cancer journey

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Miscellaneous, Words

A Gentle Hello

Years ago, when Dave was sick in the hospital on any given Sunday, it bothered me to sit in the church service on my own. It was a reminder of all our pain.

After he died, I had to learn a whole new way of living. Sitting alone has gotten easier with practice, and now, I don’t mind.

These days, if certain friends are there, we will sit together. Still, we don’t always coordinate our schedules between the two services, so it may be hit or miss.

A couple of weeks ago at church, I sat in my usual area and waited for the service to begin. Sometimes, I catch up with emails or texts. But generally, I look for others who may need a friendly face to sit with. Not for my sake, but to encourage them.

That Sunday, I saw a young woman sitting alone in the pew in front of me. I leaned forward and introduced myself with a gentle hello.

To my surprise, I got a gruff ‘hey’ back. I asked a few more questions about herself, including her name. (Let’s call her Anna.) Mostly one-word answers. I could tell she didn’t want to talk with me. So, I silently prayed for her and left her alone.

The service ended, and by that time, one of my friends had come to sit with me. My friend and I started talking while I kept my eye on Anna. She quickly gathered her belongings and walked away. I noticed she lingered about fifteen feet away, but I couldn’t tell if she was needing prayer up in front or wanted to talk with me.

I decided to pray for her that following week, that God would soften her heart and meet her needs. I didn’t know what was going on, but I am glad He knows exactly what we need!

Then last week, I missed church because I was working. My mother-in-law was able to take Lydia to church for me, and thankfully, I can watch the service online! 

So, this week, I started off the service by sitting alone. I texted a couple of friends, but they had gone to the other service. Before I sat down, I greeted a couple of guests behind me and explained a few things about our church. They were very friendly.

Then, as the first song began, we stood up and started to worship God. That’s when I saw Anna make her way to the pew in front of me. Before she sat down, she saw me and quickly came over asking if I was the person that greeted her two weeks ago.

Of course, I said yes and invited her to sit with me. Anna apologized for her bad attitude from before and admitted she has been on the “wrong path” and that she is trying to make better life decisions now.

Apparently, she had been grumpy with me because she didn’t really want to be in church that day! She had been wrestling with God about her choices.

It was so cool to see the change in Anna’s attitude and on her face. We talked for a few minutes and I learned more about her background. After the service ended, we talked a little more.

I mentioned how difficult it is to do the Christian life on our own. Then, I introduced her to one of my friends as they have a few things in common. I’m hoping Anna will continue to come and get more involved.

As followers of Jesus, we often want to see Him do something BIG, or we wait around for a sign overlooking the small opportunities in front of us. Sometimes, God does give us a significant responsibility or task.

But how often does He just want us to say a gentle hello, or invite someone to sit with us? A kind word, smile, or prayer can go a long way in reaching people for the Kingdom of God. Don’t underestimate the power of being friendly!

Serving others may cost more than mere acknowledgment, however, so don’t stop at hello. It might mean picking someone up for an event or taking them to get groceries. In other words, God’s love is practical.

Let’s be open to all the possibilities and see what He does through us!

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God, thanks for the ways You use us. You can move large mountains, or work through a still, small voice. Help me not overlook simple opportunities to reach people for You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: Do you have a specific seat or pew at church, or do you like to move around? Do you enjoy greeting others or minding your own business?

Task: Wherever you are today, at church, work, school, or even the mall, take a few moments to get off your phone and look around for someone to encourage. Say hello or offer a compliment. Maybe it will be the start of a new friendship!

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Perseverance, Prayer, Wisdom, Worship

Symphony

The last few weeks have been full of decisions and solving problems. Most are completely low-key, but just are adding up and taking my brain space. Others are more weighty and have bigger consequences (that may affect my patients, for instance).

Still, that’s not really anything new either… just lately there have been situations I don’t see as often so I have to figure out creative ways to still jump through all the right hoops. All under pressure and time constraints.

I always do my best, but I’ve been feeling a little overwhelmed with all these decisions. There are so many things to remember and boxes to check, both at work and at home. I am generally very thorough, so I don’t like feeling like I’m forgetting something.

Can you say decision fatigue?!

Yesterday, I also had some errands to run after work. I was feeling a little anxious at work and even while I was leaving. Nothing was really wrong, and my day had gone well.  By God’s grace, I accomplished more than I thought I would!

Still, the fact that I almost pulled out in front of a car didn’t help my feeling of unease. The car was moving fast through the parking lot and came from an unexpected direction, but it worried me that I hadn’t noticed until the last minute. It could’ve been disastrous.

I was grateful for God’s protection and prayed He would keep me from making any dumb decisions. I couldn’t really describe what I was feeling, though. So, I turned on the radio, like I often do, and just soaked up God’s love.

I heard four songs in a row that seemed like special messages from the Lord. As I drove, I sang along to “You Say,” by Lauren Daigle. Then, Blanca’s “Even at My Worst” came on. After that, I heard “Good God Almighty,” by David Crowder, always a peppy song. And last, I heard “Symphony” by a band called Switch.

Each song had a specific message and it was as if God was speaking just to me. I hadn’t even realized I was feeling anxious, but the songs helped me bring it all to Jesus.

He knew just what I needed! Zephaniah 3:17

I am so glad God meets us where we are. He gently shows us what’s in our hearts and guides us back to the Truth. It is helpful to pause and listen.

That could mean taking a walk and letting my mind wander back to Jesus. I see His creation, listen to the birds, and sing a little melody of my own back to Him.

I love how God can use chaos and all kinds of circumstances to bring us to a point of peace. We can bring all our weaknesses to Him and take in His strength. Nothing is impossible or too much for God.

I don’t know what you are facing today, but I encourage you to listen to the SYMPHONY He is writing. You may not quite know how it all works out just yet, but it will be beautiful!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for Your peace and protection. You are so kind and gracious, Lord. Help me stay close to You. Keep me focused on You and redirect me when I need it. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How are you holding up this week? Are you anxious, overwhelmed, tired, or afraid? Do you need to take a step back and regroup?

Tasks: If you are anxious or overwhelmed, listen to one or all of the songs linked above. Let the lyrics wash over and draw you close to Jesus. Don’t forget to breathe!

Posted on in Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Perseverance, Wisdom

Mirror, Mirror

This week, I am celebrating another birthday! While I usually am a little contemplative beforehand, I have been so busy lately that my birthday kind of snuck up on me!

Not to worry… I still have time to reflect on the past year and decide what, if anything, I want to change for the coming year. Also, we have some company coming, so I am sure it will be a fun day! At the very least, there is a restaurant I have been wanting to try!

This year, I would like keep chipping away at small goals and tasks, such as organizing my house better. Also, I’d like to prioritize self-care (more than I do now) and finally get adequate sleep (more than just a few days of 7+ hours). Oh, and I’d like to have more unstructured free time with Lydia (not using it to focus on housework and such).

Ok, that sounds like a lot! One thing I have realized is that I can’t do all that without God’s help and leading. And really, none of those goals amount to much if He’s not a part of it.

Indeed, I came across the word inertia lately. It was being used to describe someone’s personality, as in it takes a lot to move the person to action. I thought it was an interesting connection, and I can see a little bit of that in me. It can be a good thing, but not always.

When God tells me to stay, I can handle that alright (though there can be challenges). But when God tells me to move, and I am slow to do so, I have to move past the inertia. So, you can imagine my own frustration when I also have a lot of personal goals! 😉

It has been said, “The more things change the more they stay the same.” Recently, I have been thinking back a few years to times when I met similar goals with more success. And, I noticed that I had the same struggle with inertia back then!

The difference was I had more energy (and desire) to make the changes required. Now, I have grown past the insecurities I had back then and don’t care as much! Haha!

In some ways, it has been like looking in a proverbial mirror. I am surprised, but also comforted to see more evidence of how God designed me just so. I am fearfully and wonderfully made, and I can trust He has a good plan for all my quirks! I don’t have to change everything… I am already loved perfectly.

While we have to take action and keep moving forward, we also need God’s direction and wisdom. Yes, growth requires stretching and a fair amount of grace and mercy.

Ultimately, I am so grateful for all God has done in my life this past year. As long as I am listening and going where He wants me, I will be fine. 😉

I know He has more good things in store for me!

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God, thanks for bringing me through another year.  Please continue to refine me and make me more like Jesus. Help me be a good reflection of Who You are. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: As we move closer to a new season, how have your goals changed? How have you seen God’s grace in your life lately?

Tasks: Meditate on James 1:22-24. Make changes accordingly.

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Wisdom, Words

Word Up!

Life gets so busy and it seems my brain is always on the go. I’m sure you understand! Sometimes, I take a break and let my mind wander in silence, listening and waiting on the Lord. This week, while I was sitting still, I was reminded of my ThinkUp app, which is a running list of personal affirmations.

I have written about it before, though it’s been awhile since I have used it. Still, listening to my own voice and recordings was moving. Over the course of a few minutes, I was struck by statements of faith and hard won victories. Rather than just a bunch of feel-good messages, each affirmation was really a declaration of God’s faithfulness. I could see how much I have grown and how far the Lord has brought me.

It was like years of random sticky notes and ideas were in one place, and I was able to review the memories attached to them. I teared up as I heard myself speak of trust, hope, and perseverance. Instead of affirming how strong I am or want to be, I was declaring God’s power and plan over my life. He has awesome things in store for me!

Later that same day, Lydia told me about a song she had heard from one of her friends. She thought it was a lighthearted and fun summer song, and she wanted to share it with me.

Based on the title, I was guessing what the first few lyrics confirmed. It was a modern tune by a popular artist, but it was a much different song than Lydia anticipated. Nonetheless, I turned this into a learning experience!

Lydia was horrified when I interpreted the song in mostly kid-friendly terms. She was horrified, and thanked me for catching it before she embarrassed herself. (Side note: I love that she can receive gentle correction with gratitude!)

I simply explained the World has different standards than we do. This is one reason we often listen to Christian radio, but I cannot control what happens when we’re not together.

We talked for a long time about popular culture compared to God’s loving expectations for us. Or, as Lydia put it, “Following God is like having GPS in your heart. If we ask Him for help and direction, He will never lead us astray.”

I confirmed my job as a parent is to protect her, teach her, and help her navigate these situations. We reviewed critical thinking skills and the importance of searching for God’s wisdom in daily life.

We discussed guarding our heart and minds, so only good things come in and go out. We role played how to speak up or walk away from ungodly influences. I also planted a seed so the future Lydia remembers she can come to me with all her questions and concerns. It’s never too early!

Our words matter, and we cannot take them back once spoken. We also can’t forget mean or vulgar things that we hear. So, we need to be wise!

We can bring life through speaking with Truth, grace, and encouragement. Conversely, we can also tear down and discourage others. We can plant seeds of hope or seeds of doubt. 

God’s words are still having impact today. What He set in motion at Creation is still happening! His Word will endure forever, so it make sense to put more value  on, or magnify, what He says than what the World tells us. Yes, we better… Word up!

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God, thanks for the power of Your Word. Help me be responsible with the words I say. Keep me accountable with what I put into my mind so that what pours out of my mouth is honoring to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: If you don’t know all the lyrics to a particular song, do you make up your own words?

Tasks: Tune your heart to God’s Word. Memorize Scripture and meditate on it. Be wise with your words (in person and online) today!

Posted on in Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Miscellaneous, Travel

Tour de Fargo

I’ve been in Fargo for just about eleven years now. It’s always fun to see who God brings in our path. Case in point: This week, we had a blast from the past!

A friend, Julie and I met in Normal, Illinois, where we both worked as dietitians, but she is originally from South Dakota. When we first moved here, a dietitian named Julie gave me a bag of ‘Dakota Style’ potato chips. It was such a thoughtful gesture. She was the only person I knew who understood the brutal winters in the Dakotas!

Julie and her family still go back to her home state a few times each year to see her parents and sister. And on Sunday, she brought her husband and three kids a couple of hours to Fargo to see us! They got a kick out of a sign that said “Fargo… North of Normal.” Ironic! 😉

We were honored they reached out, especially since it has been a number of years since Julie and I have seen each other… I had never met the rest of her family. I’m glad we have kept up through social media, and it was fun to see the kids in real life!

We had a great time! We met downtown Fargo, on Broadway, and walked around town looking for several murals. We took some great photos and made some fun memories!

Then, we walked to Island Park enjoying the perfect weather. The kids had fun on their scooters, which conserved their energy and preserved their positive attitudes. 😉

Lydia loved leading the way for everyone, since she was familiar with the area! Thanks to COVID-19, she had gone there nearly every day last summer since it is next to a local Y. Future tour guide perhaps?

We soon made it to the Red River, where I shared with them some trivia about Fargo and the river. I enjoyed seeing our town through the eyes of our guests. We walked across a footbridge to Minnesota, too!

After that, we walked back downtown and had some ice cream at Silver Linings Creamery. Delish! Then, we piled in our cars and drove to the Red River Zoo. There was so much more we could have done… Scheels, Spitfire, Thunder Road to name a few… but it was a good overview!

It was such a fun day, and it was a blessing to see someone from my pre-Fargo days. We hope to see these friends if we head to Illinois this summer.

It’s been interesting that God has been bringing so many people from the past back into my life lately! I am excited to see what else He has in store.

He always knows just what I need, but it does require a mindset of expectation and a certain level of availability. I have to be careful not to cram my schedule, so I have some flexibility.

Just like when we reached out to our friends in Grand Forks, it was nice to be thought of when these other friends came to Fargo. It’s cool to see the flip side! How refreshing!

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God, thanks for the blessing of friends, old and new. Help me be an encouragement to others, as they have been to me. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Where are the fun places in your town you take guests? Have you been on any road trips lately to see friends or family?

Task: Reach out to a friend or family member you haven’t seen lately. Good news from far away is a huge blessing! Even the sound of your voice can be an encouragement!

Posted on in Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Prayer, Travel, Wisdom, Worship

Grand Forks Getaway

As I previously mentioned, Lydia and I had a special getaway last weekend.

We had a great weekend about an hour north in Grand Forks, North Dakota! I had made a short list of potential activities and places to visit. But, as always, God took my loose plans and put His own spin on them!

On Friday evening, we visited dear friends at a park and were visited by the ice cream truck! My friends have three kids, ages 2 to almost 6, and they are all so cute. The little boy, the middle child, wanted to hold Lydia’s hand, sit right next to her, and have her carry him. It was fun seeing Lydia respond favorably to him and his sisters. As an only child, she’s not used to siblings!

Then, Lydia and I drove across the border to Cabela’s in East Grand Forks, Minnesota. She loved it and even came out with a new stuffed animal! Soon, we crossed the bridge back to the North Dakota side. We walked around downtown before heading back to Minnesota for our car. Later, Lydia lived it up at the hotel arcade. She even won first place in the racing game! Reminds me of her dad!

On Saturday morning we had breakfast with the same friends, this time the kids were left at home. The man was one of Dave’s Caterpillar coworkers and a pallbearer at his funeral. After Dave died, I gave him Dave’s Bible. It felt like the right thing to do to bless this ‘CAT guy.’ God has blessed that small act of faith, and it has been fun to see him lead his family toward Jesus.

This man was mourning the lost of his best friend, who had just died from COVID-19 complications earlier in the week. So on Saturday, we talked about faith, Dave, family, our Caterpillar connection, and more. He acknowledged that our visit seemed like God-ordained meeting. I am so grateful I could encourage this couple because they have been such an encouragement to me!

Then, Lydia and I drove around town, visiting Widman’s confectionery and the University of North Dakota/Ralph Engelstad Arena (known for intense ice hockey games!). Later, we went to the Blue Moose Restaurant and ate tapas, walked around the mall, and visited a local indie bookstore. Lydia also drew a crowd with her marksmanship skills at Scheels!

Saturday night, we spent a couple hours at the water park in our hotel. It was huge, and we had a blast on the water slides and practicing Lydia’s swimming skills. We even ran into another friend! Then, we relaxed and watched a movie while eating some snacks.

On Sunday, we drove about 20 miles west to Turtle River State Park. We had fun hiking around and were glad we went early to beat the heat. It was gorgeous! Then, we came back home and listened to an audiobook on the way. Lydia played with a friend while I did some yard work before family Zoom.

When making our plans, it took me awhile to decide what to do and where to stay. I was trying to decide about the water park and what other attractions to see. I was also uncertain if I should contact my friends since it had been a few years since we saw them. I didn’t want them to have to adjust their plans. Turns out, I contacted them on the same day they found out about the loss of their friend. Wow!

Our whole trip was covered by God’s grace. I’d like to take Lydia to Medora, ND sometime, too, but this was the best weekend we’ve had in awhile!

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God, You are so good and faithful! Thanks for leading us and for guiding our steps. Thanks for helping us encourage others as we honor Dave’s life and legacy. Help us continue to be a blessing. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you been to Grand Forks or Medora? What do you like to do on vacation? Do you like to relax or go sight-seeing? Do you make big plans or just meander?

Tasks: Next time you are considering a trip or step out of your normal routine, prayerfully go for it! Invite God to direct your path and see how He moves on your behalf! You never know just how He may use you to bless someone else.

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance

Finding Grace #271

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

This week was busy but fun!

Work went well, and there were many interesting things that happened. Besides patient care, we had various meetings and trainings that show just how capable my team is. I really appreciate the perspective each person brings to our field. We have a lot of fun, too!

Lydia had fun at swimming lessons and learned some new techniques. It’s fun watching her bop along with the other kids. I enjoy watching her learn and grow!

Thursday, I took Lydia for a quick health check-up before school. She had symptoms of a cold and I just wanted to make sure it wasn’t COVID. Thankfully test was negative. The provider thought it was just allergies and gave her some Claritin. Overall, that seems to have helped. As a side note, I am grateful that was our first go-around with any sort of symptoms during the pandemic. Praise God!

The weather was great this week, with a lot of sunny days. It finally felt warm enough to leave my jacket at home! Spring is later here than my home state of Illinois. But, I also noticed my tulips are starting to bloom!

Today, we met with old friends, ate out, and spent time at a local water park marking eight years of Dave in Heaven. It was fun to do something different as we celebrated his life and legacy. I’m thankful for how far God has brought us, and I know Dave would be so proud!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Worship

Good God Almighty

Singer/songwriter David Crowder has a new song, called ‘Good God Almighty.’ Every time I hear it, it makes me happy and I turn it up! For me, it is a celebratory song about Who God is and for all He has done. But, it’s also a prompt to keep moving forward.

Good God Almighty
I hope You’ll find me
Praising Your name no matter what comes

‘Cause I know where I’d be
Without Your mercy
So I keep praising Your name at the top of my lungs

Tell me is He good? (He’s good)
Tell me is He God? (He’s God)
He is, Good God Almighty

This weekend, as we ‘celebrate’ eight years of Dave being in Heaven, we will continue to honor his memory. How we do that has changed over time, but in years past, we would eat some of his favorite foods and/or I would give Lydia a special gift. Despite the sadness, we have tried to enjoy the day.

As Lydia continues to grow and learn, she has more questions and emotions. That’s normal, but these things have been coming up more in conversation these last few months. So, it seems appropriate to do something bigger this time, like visit a local indoor water park! We might even meet up with some friends who knew Dave. Lydia is so excited which is fun to see!

We will have fun and might even be a little sad. That’s okay because we can still move forward in the midst of mixed emotions! And, I know Dave would be so proud of us.

Besides, if I really believe God is God, then I need to trust Him and make sure I am representing Him well. I can set a good example of perseverance for Lydia (and others).

I can praise Him when things are going well and when they are not. He knows exactly what I need, and He can help me get through it with His grace.

He is Good God Almighty despite my feelings and circumstances!

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God, thanks for bringing us through the last eight years. You are so good and faithful, Lord. Help us keep praising You no matter what Life throws at us. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Do you find it difficult to keep moving forward when Life gets rough? (I understand how difficult it can be… don’t give up!) Will you let God help?

Tasks: Listen to the song, ‘Good God Almighty.’ Then, praise God for Who He is and for all He has done!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance

In Good Company

In about ten days, Lydia and I will celebrate Dave being in Heaven for eight years. I say “celebrate” but that does not mean we don’t miss him every day. I’m simply trying to keep an eternal perspective because that’s the only way to keep moving forward.

I mentioned this previously, but I continue to see God working all around me, especially in terms of grief and loss. I am alright with that.

For instance, at work, I once talked with a Veteran who lost her twin sister. She thanked me for acknowledging her grief, and we had a wonderful conversation. I’ve learned sometimes I have to reach someone’s heart before I can address the “work” that needs attention in their head (i.e. their mindset or habits).

Then, recently, I talked with a Veteran who has been in my care for about a year and a half. He has been through all sorts of health issues including cancer and multiple falls.

I called this man to check in with him, nutritionally, but I also wanted to offer my condolences. His wife of fifty years had suddenly died. She had been such a support for him, and now she is gone. I knew it would be a tough conversation, but he reminded me about the book, A Grief Observed, by CS Lewis. Suffice it to say we had a God connection.

It was a good conversation, and I briefly explained that I was a widow. Professionally, I don’t share my story often, but it made sense in the moment. I was simply following my heart, grateful that he knows the Lord, too. That made all the difference.

My very next patient was a Veteran whose sister recently died after a brief illness. I thought that was ironic, dealing with grief twice in the same day. For this man, I did not share my story because it wasn’t necessary. I was able to encourage him just by listening.

After that, I met with still yet another Veteran. I was supposed to educate him about one illness, but then he mentioned he is receiving treatment for colon cancer. (He actually was wearing his chemo pouch, just like Dave had to do.) He mentioned one of Dave’s doctors, and his chemo regimen was the same, too. I almost couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

To my surprise, this Veteran has been dealing with his cancer for a few years and has almost zero side effects. He does not feel overly weak and still has good appetite. He is still able to be active remodeling old buildings! That made me so happy. I did not explain my background, but inwardly, I was celebrating and thanking God for giving this man good quality time with his family.

I don’t know why God has me talk with all these people (besides for work reasons), but I am grateful He can use my pain to relate to and serve others. No matter who we talk with each day, we can look for similarities and ways to connect.

Perhaps we discuss something funny, or perhaps it’s something sad. Either way, chances are God can use it to bring comfort. Each of us has pain that only He can heal. Once we understand that, we will see that we’re in good company.

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God, thanks for Your redemption and for using me to bless others. Thanks that my story can bring comfort and healing to others. You don’t waste my pain or my tears. All glory and honor to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Do you see God at work in you story? Will you let Him use you to bless others and bring healing?

Tasks: Next time you sense an opportunity where God can work, don’t resist. Just pray and trust that it’s His timing. Your job is simply to be obedient, not worry about the outcome. Let Jesus bring the SUPER to your natural abilities!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Prayer

Tenderhearted

As we go through April, I have been reminded that the 8th anniversary of Dave’s death is drawing near. May 15th will be here before we know it! Overall, I am doing well.

But, I’ve noticed a few issues steering me toward elements of grief. First, I’ve seen a few memories pop up on my phone or online. One was a video of a four-month-old Lydia “talking” to me. This was a few weeks before Dave’s sudden cancer diagnosis, so it is quite poignant. Sweet little Lydia babbling away, while none of us realized what was coming.

Second, I’ve received several prayers for health concerns. It may be entire families dealing with COVID (parents and children), or others receiving heartbreaking news or diagnoses. Some of these issues are acute and some are chronic.

One family, who I’ve known (loosely) for many years, is not dealing with cancer but other long-term health issues, which came on suddenly after a recent accident. The doctors are hopeful, but they have a long road ahead of them.

Online, the family shares the realities of their hardships, but they also shares songs and words of hope. It reminds me of when Dave was so sick and it felt like I was trying to run the race of faith for both of us. It was exhausting, but feeling everyone’s love made all the difference. Thanks for your prayers!

I do not see these memories and issues as mere coincidences. They aren’t just popping up though it feels that way at times. Instead, I sense God drawing me close and leading me to stay sensitive to His Holy Spirit. I’m grateful for these gentle reminders.

In addition to memories and prayer requests, I have been reading my NLT Chronological Bible and am learning some new things! Also, I am watching the Chosen television series. I downloaded the app and usually watch it on my tablet.

This series is powerful and it helps me see the Bible come alive. I love the character development, and it’s a great way to draw close to God’s Truth. From portraying the generosity of Jesus’ Mother to Matthew’s history and behaviors, which set him at odds with the other Disciples, the show has a lot of plausibility.

While there is no substitute for Scripture, I like to look up the Bible passages that are seen in each episode. Still, I really appreciate the creativity. It opens my imagination and helps me see God at work in my life, too.

There are some very moving moments, and I find myself thinking about the show for days. I even get a little choked up when I consider that millions of people all over the world are also watching… and learning… more of Who Jesus Is.

Those who know me best will tell you I tend to get teary-eyed when the Holy Spirit gets ahold of my heart. Sometimes it is a little embarrassing to cry easily, but I am calling it a win for being tenderhearted!

I don’t normally describe myself as such, and I used to try to be more stoic (in order to appear strong, perhaps?). Keep it together, Natalie! 😉 Yet, pain and the heartbreak of grief brings a new level of emotional acuity.

So, I don’t apologize for my feelings anymore. We don’t live by our emotions, but they can help us see Jesus more clearly…. and the needs around us.

If anything, I hope other people are encouraged to be themselves and sit with their feelings. Stay tenderhearted before the Lord and see what He will do in your life and through you to bless others.

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God, I praise You for using all my circumstances to make me more like Jesus. You are so good. Help me trust You and keep my heart pliable before You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Do you describe yourself as more stoic or tenderhearted? (I can be both, depending on the situation!) How can I be praying for you today?

Tasks: Listen to the song, “Jesus I Believe,” by Big Daddy Weave. Instead of running from pain, let it turn your heart to Jesus. He loves you so much!!