Keep It Simple, Sweetheart

This Christmas season, like many people, I am trying to stay on top of my to-do list. At times, it is a little overwhelming, and yes, I could use more sleep! šŸ™‚

But all things considered, this year feels different.

Instead of my heart feeling heavy with grief, I’m excited and coping well. Praise God!

Perhaps all those years of intense grief have been helpful after all because I have learned the art of doing less.

This year, I’ve been doing more of what makes me glad. With so many possibilities, I’ve decided to simplify.

When possible, I’ve opted out of stressful activities that don’t add to the holiday spirit. At the same time, I’ve tried new things, such as putting up outdoor Christmas lights!

Lydia and I have been enjoying Christmas music and holiday movies, decorating our tree, and sampling yummy treats! She has played in the mounds of snow with her friends, while I’ve enjoyed coffee dates with mine.

I’ve also opened my house to a handful of people who don’t have family nearby.

We have a list of fun winter activities that we would like to do, such as sledding and seeing holiday lights. As usual, Lydia’s excitement is contagious!

Thankfully, I’ve learned to appreciate rest and don’t have crazy expectations. I know my limitations and try not to overextend myself. I’m grateful for how far God has brought me and Lydia!

With all the hustle and bustle, it could be easy to forget Jesus, the reason we are celebrating in the first place! By staying present with Him, I can enjoy the true gift He is:

Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, and Prince of Peace

Friend, if you are going through a tough season of grief, let me remind you of the KISS principle: Keep It Simple, Sweetheart. šŸ™‚ There is no need to ā€œfake brave.ā€

Grief looks different for all of us, and each year brings unique challenges. It does improve eventually, but all those emotions need to run their course so you can keep moving forward.

For now, do what you need to do—no more and no less. Whether that means showing up or staying home, ask God to direct your path and show you His goodness.

Look for the gift of God’s grace…. Jesus!! He is a wonderful savior and friend.

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Heavenly Father, thank You for Jesus. What a precious gift! Be with those who are hurting this season. Show them just how much you love them and bring them peace. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: What are your favorite Christmas traditions?

Tasks: Do something special for someone who needs encouragement this season. Pray with them, invite them over for dinner, help them decorate (or clean!), or listen to them talk of their loved one. Even a small act of kindness can mean so much to someone who is hurting.

Finding Grace #143

I love giving God a shout out for what He has done. We don’t do that nearly enough!

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

This week was quite eventful. We started off in Florida, flew home with no travel delays (thank you, Lord!), and ended with work, school, and friends. We had a great time on vacation, but it’s also good to be home. God and our neighbors graciously watched over our house while we were gone… and I’m glad they didn’t have to shovel my driveway! šŸ™‚

On Wednesday, I was able to stay home and get ahead for the remainder of the week. It snowed a little, and I enjoyed spending time with God over coffee. I also appreciated the quiet space to reflect on our trip and plan ahead. Later that evening, we went to church for our JBQ practice. It was fun to see the kids after the holiday!

On Thursday and Friday, I went back to work. I appreciate having a flexible schedule! I also enjoyed talking with a coworker on the phone whom I haven’t seen since I switched offices earlier this year. I’m looking forward to catching up with her in person soon!

Today has been fairly relaxing. Our neighbor boys came over to play for a couple hours, and so we had fun with them. Then, I did some routine Saturday chores, paid some bills, and opened some mail. Lydia received a belated birthday package, so she happily opened that while we FaceTimed with family. We might finish the evening with a movie!

The picture above shows ā€˜the Star from Afar,’ our advent countdown. I hide the Star, then Lydia finds it each morning. We read a simple version of the nativity story. Each day, there is a new Bible verse to go with that part of the story. Lydia loves it and has even hid the star for me when I have forgotten. šŸ˜‰ I’d recommend it! (no affiliate links)

God is good!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

A Caution on Countdowns

This has been an interesting autumn so far! First, we had snow on October 10th which melted away. Then, we had flurries a few days last week, followed by drifting from the wind. I’ve had to shovel snow several times already. It could be a long season…

In Fargo, the potential for snow lasts from October until early May some years. Even if the calendar says spring, it can feel like winter! It’s important to manage expectations, ha!

Honestly, shoveling snow makes my shoulders ache. I do use my snowblower when necessary, but sometimes shoveling is the best option. Let’s just say that for me, snow removal is still a good opportunity for ā€œcharacter refinement.ā€

As such, I choose to reframe the situation from time-to-time… On those early, blustery mornings, I remind myself to be grateful. For instance, I am thankful for the tools and warm clothes I have acquired over the years to make the process easier. I’m also grateful for my physical health and the ability to take care of all God has given me.

I am thankful for yoga and shoulder stretches which help to somewhat ease the pain. And, I am really grateful for a reliable vehicle with all-wheel-drive to help me get around.

To my surprise, on social media, I’ve already seen a few people counting down the days until spring! But it’s not even Thanksgiving yet!

Apparently, there are around 126 days until March 20th of 2019 (the first day of spring). Perhaps I am the only person to feel this way, but I don’t appreciate these types of countdowns… they tend to mess with my attitude, if I let them.

Don’t get me wrong—I respect that some people love the heat and hate the cold. I get it… To each their own! Even in our differences, I hope we can still be friends! šŸ™‚

In my case, I like spring and summer, but I also enjoy autumn and winter. For me, it is important to celebrate—instead of complain about—each season as God brings it.

(PLEASE remind me of this in late February when my shoulders have had it! Deal?!)

My feeling is that if we were to skip ahead to our ā€˜favorite seasons,’ we would miss so much. Sure, the grass is always greener in someone else’s yard, but for me the solution is not to countdown to spring. Wishful thinking won’t make winter pass any faster. And, I don’t want discontent to sidetrack me from what God is doing in my own yard or life.

Before we go much further, let me fully disclose that I have already been watching Christmas movies on Netflix! LOL, to each their own, right?

Getting into the ā€˜holiday spirit’ is full of meaning for me this year, because while this is our 6th holiday season without Dave, it is the first one where I don’t have mixed emotions.

Truthfully, for several years after Dave died, I dreaded the holidays. I really did want to skip the entire season. The holidays were just too painful.

But, I am so glad I didn’t rush through the pain. From a grief perspective, I needed to go through each stage of processing my emotions. I couldn’t ā€˜skip it’ and still be healthy…

Through each difficult and unpleasant season of life and grief, I have understood a new level of God’s grace and faithfulness. He has brought me through it all with His love and strength! I’m eternally grateful for His kindness to me!

There is a big difference between anticipation and apprehension. One fills me with eagerness and the other expects the worst. One fills me with hope and joy and the other fills me with a sense of dread. It has to do with attitude…

To clarify, not all countdowns are bad. Planning is important, and if a countdown truly brings you joy, great! Technically, a timer on an oven is a type of countdown that may bring you joy… yum!

Rocket ships need a countdown before launching into space. Also, parents of young children may benefit from counting down the minutes before bed time.

In my house… Lydia has been counting down her birthday for several weeks. She hasn’t counted the days, but she does cross the days off her calendar each night. She is SO excited!

My point is to consider the reason for the countdown and your attitude. The takeaway is this: Does it fill you with a sense of God’s grace or a sense of grrr?? šŸ˜‰

Don’t take for granted what God has given you: time with loved ones, peace in the moment, His presence. His grace is sufficient for this day, so let’s be grateful!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for being so generous and gracious. Don’t let me get ahead of you or be ungrateful. Help me rely on You each day. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: If you are always racing to the next moment or event, what might you be missing? What other countdowns do you find helpful?

Tasks: Looking ahead can be either helpful or harmful. Consider whether it brings you anticipation or apprehension. Then, readjust. Go with God!

Finding Grace #139

I love giving God a shout out for what He has done. We don’t do that nearly enough!

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

This week had some interesting surprises, but I saw God at work all around me!

On Sunday, Lydia went to play with the neighbor boys across the street. She ended up going inside with them for a movie and dinner! I was grateful to have that unexpected time to myself. I called my sister, worked on a project and prepped food for our week.

Monday was a good day to get ahead for the week. I ran some errands, did some housework, and finished an audiobook. It was a good day to be productive!

Wednesday was Halloween. After work, Lydia and I had JBQ at church, so it was our first year of not passing out candy to our neighbors. Even though I don’t love Halloween, I did miss seeing all of our neighbors! Thankfully, Lydia still got some candy and played games with her friends at church. It was a good day overall.

On Thursday, I received a large package in the mail. The box was from my mom and was filled with goodies. She sent me some treats, jewelry, foodie gifts, and some little foxes (house decor). It was such a fun surprise!

I had allotted time on Thursday and Friday to work on a project, but ended up having a few meetings with people instead. As a result,I had a few cool opportunities presented to me. Now I’m praying about each new thing because I want to make sure they are ā€˜God opportunities.’ I’m thankful for how He directs our steps.

Tonight, we turn back our clocks one hour! (Don’t forget!) I’m looking forward to the extra hour of sleep… unless I get distracted and just stay up later instead! šŸ˜‰

Where did you find God’s grace?

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Finding Grace #137

I love giving God a shout out for what He has done. We don’t do that nearly enough!

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

This week went well and was full of God’s grace. On Monday, I ran some errands and went to the eye doctor. It was a beautiful day, and I wanted to get ahead for the rest of the busy week. Lydia and I also went to my writers group, which meets once a month.

On Tuesday, we went to parent-teacher conferences after school. I’m grateful Lydia is doing so well. She was happy to show me around her room and give me a little tour of her school! We also donated some snacks, games, and puzzles to share with her class. I’m glad to be able to encourage Lydia and her friends to learn all they can.

On Wednesday evening we went to church for JBQ. It was fun to see how much progress my little group has made. It’s so important for them to get God’s word down in their hearts, and I am grateful to be a part of that process.

On Thursday and Friday, Lydia was off from school. First, we did housework and prepared for friends to come over. To my great surprise, without being asked, Lydia started cleaning the kitchen cabinets with a little toothbrush! Then, I surprised Lydia by taking her to get her ears pierced. She was so excited because she has been requesting this for a while. It’s fun to see her growing up!

Today, we had a relaxing day at home and enjoyed the beautiful weather!

Where did you find God’s grace?

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Lighten Up!

Yesterday morning, like many mornings, I woke up groggy. It’s dark when I get up, and I am still ā€˜baby-stepping’ my morning routine! Also, I am slowly realizing I just need to go to sleep earlier… hence the baby steps.

Usually, within a few minutes, I can shake it off and go about my day. But yesterday, I didn’t feel the best and didn’t get up as early as I had planned. Soon, groggy turned into cranky.

First, I got shampoo in my eyes while showering. After that, I spent a while thinking about the long day ahead and things I can’t control. One negative thought led to another and then I started thinking about other random issues, like shoveling snow this coming winter! I even argued with Lydia about tying her shoes. It started off as one of those days…

I stayed in my funk for almost 2 hours…even with coffee. Then, I berated myself for feeling that way! Which was not helpful, of course. Thankfully, I realized that and was able to do something about it.

As I finished getting ready for my day, I listened to some of the affirmations I mentioned previously. Many of them are actually Bible verses I recorded in my own voice. I usually choose to listen in random order, and yesterday, those verses were exactly what I needed to ā€˜lighten up.’

As I refocused my mind on who God says I am, I felt my burdens lift. I began smiling and was able to go about my day more cheerfully. Whew!

A few takeaways:

Each day, there are many things we can’t control. Circumstances can change rapidly. Sometimes, we find ourselves on a downward spiral. That may not be our fault—bad things happen. Still, it is my choice to remain there.

Circumstances may not improve immediately, but life has a way of working out. It’s usually better than we think. So, I can halt any negativity knowing eventually I will find an upward trend. I can go searching for something good!

I can’t predict what will happen, but I can choose my attitude. I can expect the best.

Finally, applying God’s word to my situation is like turning on the lights in the early morning darkness. It helps me see more clearly.

Ā ā€œAnd God said, ā€˜Let there be light,’ and there was light.ā€ –Genesis 1:3.

Jesus is both the Living Word and the Light of the World. He makes the darkness flee!

There are several references to light in the Bible. Check out a few of them here:

Isaiah 9:2; Psalm 27:1; 2 Corinthians 4:6; and 1 John 1:5

We can bring the Light of Jesus to everyone we meet. If we let Him, Jesus can shine brightly through our brokenness. He will draw people to Himself, as we lighten up and enjoy life. And when we serve others by being thoughtful, kind and generous, we don’t have time to think of all our problems!

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Heavenly Father, in You there is no darkness at all! Thanks for bringing Truth and clarity to our lives. Thanks for forgiving us and carrying our burdens. May we walk in the light as You are in the light. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: When you need to ā€˜lighten up,’ what do you do? Do you notice it right away or does it take a while to discern your mood?

Tasks: Listen to the song, ā€œTrembleā€ by Mosaic. Jesus makes the darkness tremble!

Ā 

All In

Ā Lately, I have been seeing two words or concepts which keep popping up in daily life: sacrifice and investment. So, I started thinking about the relationship between the two.

Sacrifice implies a loss or even a disadvantage. Investments require a temporary cost now to gain something better later. With investments, there may even be interest!

Now, I usually don’t prefer to do things half-way. I’m either all in or all out. In certain situations, I realize compromise is important. But to me, if anything is worth doing, it’s worth doing well.

Interestingly, it seems most worthwhile goals take a fair amount of time, effort, and/or money. So perhaps you can’t really have a quality investment without some level of sacrifice. Hmmm…

At times, even small things can feel like big sacrifices. Eating well, exercising, and getting adequate rest are examples. But, these are also investments in our health. When that mental switch occurs between sacrifice and investment, my attitude instantly improves! The challenges don’t seem so difficult. The momentary struggle is worth it!

Similarly, in late September, my local school district voted on a referendum for new schools, upgrades to security, and more. For me, it was a no-brainer. Our school district is growing rapidly and needs to make some adjustments.

I’m thankful the referendum passed, but I understand that some people feel differently. It may be a large sacrifice for them. Or, perhaps they have different priorities than me. That’s okay!

My additional annual cost will be somewhere around the cost of a nice pair of shoes. Now, for me, that’s not a big deal. Ultimately, it is an investment in my community and my child.

In a few short years, Lydia will be in a school that is currently overcrowded. The referendum money will help alleviate that issue. It’s worth it…so I’m all in.

A strong marriage also requires a lot of hard work. My neighbors recently celebrated their tenth wedding anniversary. Ten years ago, they planted an apple tree, and this year, they were finally able to harvest enough fruit to make it worthwhile!

They spent a lot of time this past weekend making pies, applesauce, dehydrated apples, etc. Lydia and I even received some delicious homemade ā€œanniversary apple crispā€ from their bounty. Their original investment has overflowed to bless us too!

Similarly, parenting is one investment that requires many sacrifices. I’m already starting to see some great things in Lydia. But overall, it will take another 10-20 (30?!) years to see the full impact of all I invest in her. Lord, help me do my best!

I want to be wise with my resources and be a good steward. Still, Lydia is worth every bit of my time, effort/energy, and money. That’s the nature of parenting.

In the same way, spiritual disciplines are also important. Spending time with Jesus is an investment with eternal rewards! That said, we are as close to Him as we want to be.

The more we pray and get to know Jesus, the greater confidence we have that He loves us and is for us. And, the more time we spend reading and memorizing Scripture, the more it flourishes in our hearts.

When we go through tough seasons, we can sacrifice our self-pity and lay down our fear, choosing to praise the Lord despite our troubles. Through worship, we can experience more joy, peace, grace, and blessing.

Jesus paid the ultimate sacrifice with His life on the Cross. Then, He gave us the Holy Spirit as a guarantee for what is to come—and to help us live a life full of Victory!

Jesus’ commitment to us shows us just how valuable we are to Him. He gave up everything to rescue us and to prove His love for us. He’s all in!

We can never out-give God—our sacrifices will never measure up—but we can be grateful for all He has done for us! His investment in us continues to grow! Praise God!

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Heavenly Father, thank You for Jesus! You are so faithful, going above and beyond to rescue us and bless us. May we show our gratitude and bless others, too…seeing relationships as investments, not just sacrifices. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What kinds of sacrifices and investments are you making in your day-to-day life? Is Jesus part of that process?

Task: Listen to ā€œAll Inā€ by Matthew West.

Finding Grace #134

I love giving God a shout out for what He has done. We don’t do that nearly enough!

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

This was an awesome week, full God’s grace. On Monday, I video-chatted with a good friend. She called me from Sweden, and we had a good time catching up. I also was grateful for the rainy weather, because it forced me to do some indoor work. I accomplished a lot that day! šŸ™‚

On Tuesday, our local school district was voting on a referendum to build a third high school, improve security at the schools, and more. I voted before work and was happy to find out Tuesday night that the referendum passed. I am thankful for the right to vote, and I always think of the women before me who fought for that right. šŸ™‚

On Wednesday, it was work and JBQ as usual. Lydia did well memorizing her answers for the week. Then, a couple we met in Fargo, who now lives in Colorado, came to stay with us for a couple of days. They have a little boy, and it was an honor to have them visit us. It’s always fun to catch up with old friends, especially those who knew my late-husband, Dave!

I’m leading a Bible study on Thursday evenings, and we’ve had great conversations. The topic is on fear, and it’s interesting to see how each of us relates. We talkedĀ forĀ quite a while after the book portion was done. I was so touched when one person said, ā€œYou know it’s a good groupĀ when you’re still visiting an hour after it was supposed to be over!ā€œ

This week, the weather was chilly. Autumn is definitely here! I hope to mow one more time, and have a few other outdoor jobs to complete before it gets much colder. Still, I enjoy this time of year and am thankful for a variety of seasons! One more reason to choose joy ahead of time!

Where did you find God’s grace?

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Choose Joy

I have previously written about a choice we have to make between fear and faith. Choosing faith is about consistently trusting Jesus and not giving in to fear. If it were easy, everyone would do it! šŸ™‚

Another choice we can make is between joy and misery. I don’t always remember that I have a choice in how I feel…but I do have a choice. I can’t control the outcome or situation, but I can control how I react…

So lately, I have been being more proactive—planning ahead of time what my ā€˜reaction’ will be in a given situation. I think about my day in terms of all the choices and activities I face.

I choose between getting up early or sleeping in. I also choose my attitude each morning when getting myself and Lydia ready for the day. I consider all the people I will see and influence through conversations. I even think about what I’m going to have for lunch or dinner, and the fact that I need to go to the store at some point.

Not all of these will go as I imagine, and that’s to be expected. Quite often, life seems upside down. There will be some surprises!

But instead of making my emotions the center, I focus my heart on Jesus. This helps me not attach my faith to the outcome…but to Jesus alone.

He is the one who determines my steps.

Ultimately, my ā€˜success’ is not measured by the world’s standards. It comes down to if I am obedient to God, to follow His instructions. And that takes work…effort.

As such, I aim to go to sleep at a certain time. I tell Lydia how much I love her. I choose to pray for my patients before I get to work. I do my best with what I have.

Yet, there is one more way I can prepare myself for success: I can choose joy ahead of time. Or, at the very least I can choose not to be miserable, by having a good attitude and not complaining!! There is joy in serving the Lord!

Happiness is linked to whether our environment is pleasing to us. Happiness, while certainly good, is based on emotions. It is subject to change based on what happens.

Cue the emotional roller coaster…when times get tough!

Joy is more internal, not dependent on outward circumstances, which can change quite rapidly. Joy is a fruit of the Spirit and is from God. It’s not optimism or positivity, as nice as those are. Joy comes when God fortifies us with His strength.

Joy shines most brightly in the midst of trials. Choosing joy comes with trusting God and stepping forward in faith. Joy is invaluable. It’s not always easy, but choosing faith, joy, and Jesus is always worth it!

Neither faith nor joy is easy all the time. If they were, we wouldn’t struggle—and we wouldn’t need Jesus. There will be tough days ahead…guaranteed.

But by God’s grace, we have made it through every other tough day so far. And praise God, we can keep moving forward in joy and faith…even if we don’t feel like it!

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God, thank You for being with us in each trial. Thanks for leading us and preparing the way. Help us not get stuck in our emotions, but move forward with wisdom, courage, faith, joy, and grace. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Do you consider yourself ā€˜joyful’? Why or why not?

Tasks: Listen to ā€œJoyā€ by For King and Country. Make sure you turn it up and dance!

Finding Grace #133

I love giving God a shout out for what He has done. We don’t do that nearly enough!

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

This was a good week, full of fun events. On Sunday, a pastor I know from Illinois visited; he knows my parents too. He gave me a shout out from the pulpit. It was fun to connect with him after the service. It’s a small world!

On Tuesday, I left work late and missed picking up Lydia from the bus. I texted my neighbor, Melissa, who was able to take Lydia home. When I arrived a few minutes later, she asked if Lydia could stay and play. During that time, I was able to complete a few chores and my Wednesday blog post. Then, she fed us both dinner and dessert! I’m grateful for Melissa’s generosity and God’s provision! Thank you! šŸ™‚

Lydia worked really hard, read and studied all her JBQ questions. She was able to answer all the questions correctly and moved on to the next booklet. I enjoyed leading her group and am impressed by how many kids are memorizing God’s word. What a blessing!

I had my ā€œFacing Fear, Finding Faithā€ Bible study on Thursday. I’m really grateful for the opportunity to lead the group. Going through this with others helps me, too. I’m glad we don’t have to be afraid!

Today, Lydia and I went with our friend, Sara, to a local ā€˜junk market’ at the fairgrounds, which as you may guess has antiques, upcycled items, jewelry, specialty foods, as well as new house decor. All afternoon, we had so much fun perusing the market! It’s a fun tradition! I bought a few fun magnets for my refrigerator and a couple of pictures.

We’ve had beautiful weather this week, but, it is starting to get cooler. I’ve noticed fewer Monarch butterflies day-by-day…and the Canada geese also are starting to head south. The trees are also starting to change colors. The autumn is a short season, but it is so lovely! šŸ™‚

Where did you find God’s grace?

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!