Tag: Peace

Posted on in Being Gracious, Food and Nutrition, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom

The Battle Belongs to the Lord

The last two days, work has been a little hectic. Not bad, just busy.

I already had a full schedule without much time in between patients. And then, I had some unexpected phone calls to return. Phone calls are normal, but these were a little more involved and time-consuming.

I ‘inherited’ a complex patient with many medical problems. I was assigned to take over after they made unfounded complaints about a very qualified coworker. Simply put, the patient’s family did not get the answers they wanted, and sadly, his prognosis is difficult to accept.

This patient requires a feeding tube, but it’s unusual due to how the tube was placed and medical complications (not related to his VA care). To start, the patient has cancer and is undergoing multiple treatments. But the bad news just keeps piling up.

In many ways,  it reminds me of Dave’s own cancer battle… and my emotional reactions. Unfortunately, this patient has even more medical issues, if you can imagine that.

Free Doctor Doctor'S Office photo and picture

So, while I am empathetic towards the patient, he has a lot of needs. I have years of experience to draw upon, but each situation is different. I have fought to get them what they need, but more than once, the family has put me on the spot. While I encourage advocacy for loved ones, I consistently do my best to provide the highest level of care.

In the past, with other patients, I occasionally have been yelled at when trying to get to the bottom of certain challenges. For instance, I won’t order something if it puts the patient at more risk. I wait until I have adequate justification, but patients sometimes argue and make their own decisions anyway (which is their right). While it doesn’t happen often, this week, I felt circumstances were going in that direction.

Even though the patient’s family had been friendly on the phone, they went to other sources to try and get what I wasn’t quite ready to provide. I was still gathering information and needed them to work with me, not against me. Nonetheless, it made me feel like they thought I wasn’t doing my job.

And reflecting on my own journey, I remembered my fight is not against other people (Ephesians 6:12). Still, I dreaded calling the patient again. 

Then yesterday morning, I was in my car getting ready to walk inside to my office. I was stalling by listening to the radio in my car. One of my favorite songs, “Battle Belongs,” by Phil Wickham, came on. (Sample lyrics below)

When all I see is the battle, You see my victory
When all I see is the mountain, You see a mountain moved
And as I walk through the shadow, Your love surrounds me
There’s nothing to fear now for I am safe with You
So when I fight, I’ll fight on my knees
With my hands lifted high
Oh God, the battle belongs to You
And every fear I lay at Your feet
I’ll sing through the night
Oh God, the battle belongs to You
And if You are for me, who can be against me? Yeah
For Jesus, there’s nothing impossible for You
When all I see are the ashes, You see the beauty
Thank You God
When all I see is a cross, God, You see the empty tomb
So when I fight, I’ll fight on my knees
With my hands lifted high
Oh God, the battle belongs to You
And every fear I lay at Your feet
I’ll sing through the night
Oh God, the battle belongs to You
Almighty fortress, You go before us
Nothing can stand against the power of our God
You shine in the shadow, You win every battle
Nothing can stand against the power of our God
Nurse placed adapter in equipment probe of enteral nutrition, palliative care in hospital, conceptual image, composition hotizontal Nurse placed adapter in equipment probe of enteral nutrition, palliative care in hospital, conceptual image, composition hotizontal enteral nutrition stock pictures, royalty-free photos & images

Singing along, I was gently reminded that not only is God for me, He is also for my patient and his family. Not only is He for us as people, but He is also 100% against cancer. God will always aim for a win-win, and only He has the power to do it time and again!

Yes, I remembered this battle belongs to the Lord. So, I decided to let God fight for me, knowing He is also fighting for my patient. I had a good brainstorming session with two of my coworkers, including the specialist on the case before me. I was still nervous to call, but when I did, a creative temporary solution had already been provided. They were going to try that, and I’ll check back with them later this week. 

It’s still a very tough trial, and short of a miracle, this patient will continue to decline. But, while it’s my job to care for him nutritionally, I also feel responsible to pray for his comfort, healing, and well-being. Similarly, I can respond with grace and compassion, since I know what it feels like when the tables are turned.

Ultimately, Jesus is our living hope. There is no need to fear. We can trust Him in all things because He has already won the war, and our Victory is in Him!

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God, You are so good. Thanks for taking good care of all my patients and me. Thanks for fighting our battles, Lord. Help us rely on You and share Your love with others. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you ever been in a similar situation, where you are doing your best and people misjudge your effort (or you feel like they are)? How did you handle it?

Tasks: Remember that fear and dread are not from God. Put your trust in Jesus, and watch Him fight your battles.

 

Posted on in Being Gracious, Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Kindness, Miscellaneous

Finding Grace #385

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Free Sunflower Yellow photo and picture

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was a busy but good week! Each night, I stayed up fairly late but still didn’t accomplish everything I needed to. I was chasing my tail, but it all worked out alright.

Work went well and kept me on my toes. We had an employee appreciation event and that included lunch, plinko, other games, and axe throwing! It was a modified version (for safety and liability) but was so fun!

My evenings were quite busy, too! On Monday, I ran errands and did paperwork after work. I finished my blog on Tuesday night and also mowed, pulled weeds, and caught up with my neighbors. Wednesday was volleyball and youth group for Lydia and grocery shopping for me. On Thursday, I helped Lydia with a few little projects. On Friday, among other things, I completed Lydia’s school registration and paid some bills. Whew!

This morning, I was on-call for work and had to go in for four consults! It wasn’t so bad, but I did stay about three hours. I was glad to be able to serve these patients this morning.

Lydia went to a Minnesota lake with a friend’s family for the weekend. She sent me a couple of messages about all the fun she’s having. I told her I am watching movies and eating ice cream. So, a win-win, right?! 😉

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom

Shine Bright

Yesterday was an interesting day at work! It started off fairly busy without much downtime. My morning flew by with charting and three hour-long patients. Then, two people canceled in the afternoon, giving me time to eat lunch and catch up on more charting before my final afternoon patient.

That’s all pretty standard. But then the power went out in my office and the one next door, where two of my coworkers sit. It was a utility failure! We could not get anything done in the pitch black… so we decided to take a quick walk outside and enjoy the bright sun. We decided to make the best of it!

By the time we came back, everything was up and running again. I thought I lost two of my notes, which were in progress, but thankfully, the computer saved them. I was glad I didn’t have to redo all my work!

An hour or so later, one of the managers walked by, warning us to save our work just in case. There was another (planned) power outage. Sure enough, a few minutes later, my screens went black again. I went to warm up my coffee, and by the time I returned, everything was back to normal.

I’m glad this didn’t happen when my patient was there. We had full power when she walked in a few minutes later!

Later, as I drank my coffee and charted on notes, I thought about ways to handle the unexpected things that pop up, such as challenges, failures, or inconveniences. God doesn’t expect us just to sit alone in the dark with a negative attitude. He wants to shine through us!

There are many ways to destress, such as talking with friends, taking a walk, making a warm drink, taking a nap, or journaling. Instead of being upset about all that’s wrong, we can be thankful for what’s going right.

But most of all, I am grateful for God’s presence and understanding. It’s good to pause and reconnect with God because He always meets us where we are! He graciously provides for all our needs.  

Regardless of the day’s adventures, we always have the opportunity to shine bright for Jesus!

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God, thanks for all the ways You help us! Thanks for helping us make the best of daily stresses. May we shine bright and bring honor to You! In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How has God shown up for you this week? Can you see His grace and provision?

Task: Reframe your next unexpected problem and see it through God’s lens.

 

Posted on in Books and Movies I Like, Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Miscellaneous

Finding Grace #384

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Free Willow-Leaved Pear Pear photo and picture

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was a good, quiet week! Lydia was at camp Monday through Friday, so I worked and then had my evenings free. It was the most we’ve ever been apart, but I think we both managed well. Thankfully, I have spent time cultivating solitude and am comfortable on my own! In fact, it was a nice treat. 🙂

A couple of days after work, I ran errands and meandered home. I visited a new bookstore, went to the kitchen store at the mall, checked out a local foodie market, and ate some ice cream. I was going to work on some projects (chores) around the house, but I decided they could wait. Instead, I just enjoyed losing track of time!

On Tuesday, I went to see ‘Sound of Freedom’ in the theater. It was an outstanding production, and I encourage you to go support it. You can read my movie review here.

Work went well, and I had some fun patients and encouraging talks with my coworkers. One day, we had a fast and furious storm and we dashed to our cars in the torrential downpour. Hilarious! In addition, I received some compliments and also a little recognition for my work with a Veteran. It felt good to be celebrated!

On Friday, Lydia came home! She had a blast and I enjoyed hearing all about her adventures. She felt really close to the Lord, which was an answer to prayer. We ate some homemade lasagna and watched a movie while cuddling. It’s great to have her back!

Today, we had a relaxing morning and then went to a street fair with some friends. We enjoyed walking and chatting, checking out local products, and eating Greek ‘street food.’ We saw a ton of dogs and enjoyed people-watching, too! The weather was perfect as well!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Fruit, Gratitude, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting

Finding Grace #383

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was a fun week with lots of awesome highlights!

On Monday, I went to work and had a busy day, in that only three of our team were there! Most of my coworkers had approved time off, and one person was sick. We usually don’t try to cut it short like that, but thankfully, we were able to get all the work done.

We celebrated Independence Day on Tuesday. Lydia and I went to see the new Indiana Jones matinee (really good!) and then hung out with several families in our neighborhood that evening. I also invited our African friends over for fireworks and explained our American customs. We had fun catching up over watermelon and s’mores. Moreover, it was hilarious when the youngest kept shoving marshmallows into her mouth, even when her mom was ‘yelling’ at her to stop. 🙂 They clearly don’t eat many sweets, and I love that good parenting translates across cultures!

This week, at work, I spent a couple of days tracking down specialty devices for a patient with tube feeding. I went downstairs to the pharmacy to look through their supplies and spent time with my boss looking online. We found two good solutions, and the patient was very happy. I hope it eases their challenging situation a little.

Yesterday, I had an older patient who was malnourished with several long-term conditions. But, he was fun to talk with and eager to learn! His 90+-year-old parents are in good health, recently driving an hour to pick him up from the hospital! And, his mom still occasionally sends food home with him because she knows he’s not eating enough. (He did a subtle eye roll but clearly adores her.) 🙂 It was heartwarming and funny at the same time. A mother’s love never ends!

Today, we did little things around the house. We started by eating fruit pizza with my morning coffee on the deck. It was perfect, and I enjoyed listening to the melody of my windchimes blend in with the birdsong. Later, Lydia packed for church camp, and I got in a good workout. Thanks, Lord, for these summer days!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom, Worship

Sounds of Freedom

When you think about the sounds of freedom, what comes to mind? Gunshots? Bombs? Running? Soldiers yelling orders? Crying? The Star Spangled Banner? Fireworks?

All of those do represent the long fight for freedom. Where would we be without those brave souls who fought and died for those of us several generations down the road? I am glad they aren’t a part of the typical daily American life, but they do still occur around the world. I am grateful for those who continue to fight for freedom and justice.

Free Usa Flag photo and picture

Here are some sounds I associate with freedom.

The weather. That is, being able to hear just the wind or the rain clearly without focusing our attention on survival. I love hearing my windchimes make up their own songs.

To me, freedom sounds like birds chirping. They would not feel so inclined to sing if danger was imminent. Other nature sounds include leaves and grass rustling, crickets chirping, and frogs singing.

Peace around the house, heard in the mundane sounds of the refrigerator, dishwasher, or laundry machine. Being able to enjoy conveniences like indoor plumbing and electricity! Having peace and quiet is a privilege.

“Thank you.” Gratitude for our independence. Thankful for our military and soldiers’ sacrifices. Being a good friend and neighbor. Standing up for injustice. Accepting help, not giving in to fear. Receiving God’s provision and protection.

Laughter. Is there any better sound than the laughter of a child? Lately, Lydia’s joy has been contagious. Her sense of humor is spot on, and I am grateful for these lighthearted moments. So many kids around the world are not always able to be so carefree.

Explaining our American traditions to those who are experiencing them for the first time. I invited our African neighbors to join us for last night’s fireworks. We sat in the driveway eating watermelon and smores. It was fun to see their faces light up in wonder!

Worship. I’m grateful for the right and ability to go to church, praise God at home, and talk about all He is doing in my life… openly and in public, knowing that some believers have to meet secretly and at the cost of their lives. May I never take that for granted!

As I think about freedom, I think of Jesus’ ultimate gift and sacrifice for us. In Him, we have every right and freedom. Freedom from fear, freedom from sin, freedom from tyranny, freedom from eternal death. May we walk wisely and with gratitude.

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God, thank you for the gift of freedom and the ability to enjoy it. May we never forget the great cost of freedom. As we celebrate American independence, help us remember that we are dependent upon You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What does freedom mean to you, and how does your life reflect those values? Do you have any special 4th of July traditions?

Tasks: Consider what sounds you associate with freedom. Make sure to pause and thank God for them! And, remember to bring Jesus along with you as you celebrate.

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Kindness, Miscellaneous

Finding Grace #382

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was an interesting week! It seemed longer since I had a regular work week of five days instead of only working a couple days each of the last two weeks! 😉 I felt productive and was happy to help my coworkers. We shared some fun laughs and learned a lot while performing one of our annual competencies!

Lydia and I did some more weeding and caught up with our neighbors. One night, we helped some young kids find books at our little free library (on the edge of our property). It was fun to meet them and watch them interact with the books!

Yesterday, I went to a funeral service at the Fargo National Cemetary after work. I wanted to support my widowed friend and also saw some other people from church. I have been to several funerals with military honors, but never one at a national cemetery. It was so cool to see how this Veteran was honored. I am thankful for his service, and it fills me with gratitude ahead of the 4th of July next week.

This week, Lydia joined me during my exercise routine. I let her use some lighter weights and she followed along with my personalized program. It was fun to see her write down her accomplishments. Today, she told me she already feels stronger!

Today, I made a few food items, did laundry and some other chores, worked out, and then mostly relaxed! We did some reading and then watched a couple of shows together. It felt good to have a slower pace after a busy week!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Pivot, Prayer, Wisdom, Worship

On Summer Bucket Lists

Summer is always an exciting time of year. Typically, there are a lot of fun activities, people to see, and places to go. Summer weather sure makes it easier to get around. Small errands are quick and don’t take extra effort! Indeed, it is great not to have to bundle up in layers just to go outside! 

Sometimes, it’s difficult to figure out what to do and what to skip. We are more likely to try new things in summer because it feel more free. The daytime hours last longer, but if I am not careful, I could sign up for too much and miss all the wonderful surprises of the season.

It is wise to pray and ask for wisdom before we make our plans.

Free Sunflower Flower photo and picture

For my summer bucket list, I would like to take at least one little hike with Lydia and at least one early morning bike ride with her (before traffic gets crazy). I want to keep working on my yard and sit around a campfire with friends. I want to read some books and listen to my windchimes while sitting on the deck. Add a cup of coffee for the perfect Saturday morning… It’s good to find time to be still!

Lydia’s list is fairly short. She would like to go swimming and hang out with her friends.  She’s also excited to play volleyball and go to camp. Pretty simple.

Last night, I was reminded of a memory from ten years ago when I questioned God’s faithfulness. I angrily accused God of not doing His part to bring the spring. Yes, it had been a really long winter watching Dave decline… But then, in His own way and time, the Holy Spirit whispered to my heart, “I always bring the spring, and I bring the summer, too.”

Immediately, I understood that He had a good plan for me regardless of what happened. (And things certainly got worse!) But, over the years, I have found myself thinking about the summer metaphor, and just as I was writing this post, it hit me.

Maybe this is it.

Free Sunset Sun photo and picture

Lydia and I are not just having a great summer, we are in a place where we are thriving. We have found a good rhythm and are growing every day. We aren’t letting little setbacks become major. We are seeking God’s grace and finding it along the way. We are grateful.

That doesn’t mean everything is perfect. But, it is good. Summer is about a third over, but we don’t know how long the metaphorical summer will last. So, I better make the best of every season and trust God.

You might be going through something rough right now, and it’s hard to see the way forward, let alone think of a bucket list. I understand.

Draw near to God; lay your burdens at the feet of His throne. Rest in Him.

If you let Him, He will carry you to a good spot where you will thrive. He is faithful.

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God, thanks for the gift of summer. You have good plans for us, always. Help us make the most of our time in this beautiful season. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: Do you have a summer bucket list? What are your top three items on the list?

Task: Make a list of all the things you would like to do. Road trips, concerts, camping, fishing, etc. Map out your summer because it will go fast!

 

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Travel

Finding Grace #381

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was a very relaxing week filled with family on vacation! On Sunday, Fathers Day, we hung out with my dad and mom plus Dave’s family at the beach in Florida. It was a perfect day.

Then, on Monday, I tried surfing for the first time. I’m really proud of myself and felt strong and confident. Sometimes, we need to push out of our comfort zone and try something new. I am so glad I did, and I can’t wait to go again!

We flew back later Tuesday and spent the next day resting. Both of us weren’t feeling well, so I am glad I took Wednesday off from work ahead of time. Lydia did manage to go to volleyball practice, but then she skipped youth group and was in bed by 7:30 p.m.

On Thursday, I went to work a little late to make sure Lydia was okay. I wasn’t quite 100% either, but I pulled through. I knew I had a busy day covering for someone else who had been on vacation, too. Lydia just rested all day, which is the best thing she could have done.

By Friday, we were both healthy again. Lydia said the best part of her day was that she felt well. I stayed later at work to finish up some patient care and came home to do a few little tasks.

This week, I tore down a barnswallow nest earlier in the week (after confirming there were no eggs). They had already made a big mess, and I didn’t want them sitting right on my front door. I set out a little plastic owl figure on the step and haven’t seen them since. I hope they find another place to roost, though. They sure are pretty!

Today, we mostly relaxed! Usually, we jump right back into our routine, so it’s been nice to have a slower pace. It rained on and off all day, thus we enjoyed reading and having some quiet time together. I need to mow, but the grass is wet. I’ll take it as a confirmation just to rest!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Travel

Family Time in Florida

This past week, Lydia and I enjoyed a great vacation in Florida! We visited my parents in Jacksonville for a couple of days and then stayed in condos with Dave’s family in St. Augustine Beach.

We were in Florida from Wednesday through Tuesday. Originally, we planned it around the Juneteenth holiday, and later I realized it was also Father’s Day weekend. What a blessing!

We stayed at a nice hotel in Jax with an amazing view. We also tried some local restaurants with my parents. On Thursday, my dad and I took a walk along the St. Johns River. We walked under five of the city’s seven bridges in about seventy-five minutes. I even found public exercise equipment outside under a bridge with cow murals… kettlebells, medicine balls, battle ropes, weights, etc. I had to try them all out!

Then, we hung out at the hotel during a big storm. Before it rolled in, we visited the nineteenth-floor skydeck, which boasted a rooftop pool and exercise room. Later, we enjoyed watching the dark clouds, torrential rain, and lightning strikes from our tenth-floor room. I’m glad we were safe, and I can only imagine how it looks during a hurricane!!

On Friday, we drove to our condos. We see Dave’s mom often but have not seen his brother, Kevin, much lately. We also saw Dave’s sister, Brooke, her husband, Dale, and their family for the first time in nine years. We’d wanted to see them sooner, but they live in a different part of the state than my parents. So we typically can’t see everyone on one trip. Plus, the pandemic didn’t help!

I had so much fun getting to know my four nephews and two nieces again! The kids were as sweet and easygoing as ever. Lydia was really excited to get to know her cousins since she was only two-and-a-half when we last saw them. We periodically video chat, but it’s not the same. Within minutes we set up a family group chat for texting pictures, jokes, and pertinent information. Technology at its finest!

We were right on the beach, so there was easy access for our daily jaunts to the ocean. We swam, made resorts for little fish, played spike ball, and also played with a giant beach ball. We also played card games, played BeanBoozled (the jelly bean game!), and told jokes.

One morning we had homemade lemon-blueberry scones and watched a slideshow of memories as we celebrated my mother-in-law’s recent June birthday. We reminisced about Dave a little, too.

Then, my parents joined us at the beach on Father’s Day. They are well-versed in Florida life now and fit right in. Actually, our families have always mixed well, so in some ways, it was just like old times. Dale and Dad caught up, and my nephews chimed in about the waves, current, and weather conditions.

On Juneteenth, I got to try surfing the Atlantic! One of the girls and Dale gave me some tips on land. Then, Brooke guided me on the water. We paddled out together and had a good conversation in between the waves. She was full of encouragement, mentioning she started two years ago when she was forty, so I am a perfect age to try something new!

We had a blast, and I stayed out for an hour and a half. I was able to catch a few waves body boarding and on my knees. I tried to stand but fell off, as expected. But I’m proud of how I did and even got compliments on my strength and perseverance!

Yesterday, we packed up for our two flights back to Fargo. We were able to spend a few wonderful hours with my mom again before heading to the airport. (Dad was at work.)

Our flights (four total) were uneventful, an answer to prayer. Our entire trip went well, despite some seasonal rain. Thankfully, we made the best of it, and in most cases, the weather shifted very quickly for the better.

In short, this trip felt like a celebration but also a renewal of family relationships. It was just the reset and salve I needed. I look forward to reaching out to everyone with a little more regularity and hopefully seeing them a little more often!

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God, thanks so much for blessing our trip and keeping us safe. Thanks for the gift of family. Help us continue to grow together in grace and love. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What’s your favorite family vacation? What makes it stand out to you?

Task: Reach out to family (and even friends) regularly. Try once a week or at least a couple of times a month! Make sure to tell others how much you love them!