Finding Grace #22

I love the concept of giving God a shout out for what He has done.

We don’t do that nearly enough!

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as “God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense.” Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot. I find grace overflowing in God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

flowers in the woods

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

  • This was a really fun week. Lydia had Busy Beaver camp all week (at the Y). She went with a friend and had so much fun learning about science. As a result, my work schedule was altered in order to pick up the girls. It seems God had it all planned out though, because I had some unexpected free time on two of those days I normally work. I had a great meeting with a friend and was able to finish off an important project as a result.

  • Later in the week, my mother-in-law came to visit. We went window shopping, enjoyed several new restaurants, and went to a new little zoo outside of Detroit Lakes, MN. We took Lydia to a park to enjoy the fabulous weather and took a family friend to dinner. We had a great time with her!
  • My mother-in-law is so helpful with Lydia and she often has good ideas. I will need to re-stain my deck in a few weeks, but I had forgotten how the process worked. It can be challenging to make house decisions on my own, when previously Dave was so knowledgeable. This time, my mother-in law helped me sort through the plethora of options at the store. Thankfully, I remembered the original colors! A few years ago, some men from church volunteered to help me stain the deck, organize the garage, and lay down mulch. By God’s grace, the fact that I can do it myself this year is a testament to just how far I have come!
  • I have been making some upgrades to my home lately. For the most part, I have simply been switching furniture around and hanging pictures. But, in a few cases, I have sold items and bought replacements. So, this week, my mother-in-law also helped me pick out a cute little bistro table for my deck. Since Lydia and I don’t need a large table with tons of chairs, I wanted something a little smaller. I already found the one I wanted, but couldn’t decide which color on my own! 🙂
  • The entire bistro table and two chairs came in one box. The directions were written in spotty English and it took at least 30 minutes to understand how to put it all together. Enter God’s grace! It would have been very frustrating to do it all on my own, but my mother-in-law was very helpful! She held chair legs in place and together we figured it all out!
  • Finally, this week, my mother-in-law suggested Lydia learn to ride sans training wheels. With her at our house, there was more motivation! Next year, Lydia will probably be too big for her current bike, and this one is closer to the ground should she fall. Considering my mother-in-law helped Dave (Lydia’s Daddy) so many years ago, I am sure she took special delight in helping Lydia!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Where did YOU see or experience God’s grace this week?

Finding Grace #12

I love the concept of giving God a shout out for what He has done.

We don’t do that nearly enough!

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as “God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense.” Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot. I find grace overflowing in God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

full rainbow

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

    • On Monday, I went to an all-day women’s conference in Fargo. I wasn’t thrilled about sitting down for almost 10 hours, yet we had several breaks throughout the day, and this year was the best yet! Each speaker was so good; I enjoyed every minute. I even met a Registered Dietitian I have followed for years. So that was really cool! I’m so thankful for a 10-hour drop-in daycare and that Lydia is fairly flexible and enthusiastic in these situations. “Lydia, you will get to eat breakfast and lunch there…but I will pick you up before supper time.”  I packed her bag full of fun, healthy foods and she was set. “Oh, YES! I’m so excited!”
  • On Tuesday, I mowed the lawn. Not super exciting, but the forecast predicted rain all week and I wanted to stay on top of it. Then, I decided to water the grass because it was extra crispy. I haven’t watered the grass in three years, but since it is so early in the season, I needed to do something about it! Lydia played with the neighbors the entire time. We didn’t go to bed until after 9pm that night. It was so beautiful and sunny. We thoroughly enjoyed our time outside!
  • On Wednesday, I woke up sore from moving the water hose around the yard…only to see it raining. (I actually love a good rain storm and even saw a rainbow later!) Lydia had been hoping for rain all week so she could use her new Hello Kitty umbrella! So, we headed outside to walk around in the rain for a few minutes. Then, we stayed outside so Lydia could enjoy the experience. 🙂 Hey, life is short! She rode her bike in the rain, jumped in a large puddle, and picked clover “flowers.” We also played catch with a tennis ball. It was great to see her delight in such simple joys.
  • Friday afternoon’s weather brought a thunderstorm and a couple ‘little’ tornadoes in a neighboring town! Later, we spent the evening with my friend, Amy, and her family. Amy recently graduated from college and I am so proud of her. We were introduced by mutual friends, after our husbands died of cancer. We’ve been encouraged by each other over the last couple of years, as we have shared our stories. Amy has three young school-aged children and has worked so hard these last few years to provide for her family by pursuing (and finishing) her degree. College is difficult enough, but I cannot imagine doing it with kids. Like me, Amy has also relied on God to get her through. What a testament of His grace in her life… empowering Amy to do the impossible!
  • Today, Lydia and I had a special day together. We went to the Fargo zoo, had a picnic lunch at the park, had a tea party, painted her nails at home and few other activities. Our week was jammed with many fun and interesting activities, but these are the highlights. I am continually amazed to see how diverse our experiences have been each week. God is writing a wonderful story, and I am so thankful for His grace as I see it unfold day by day.

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Where did YOU see or experience God’s grace this week?

Sharing Our Stories

Thanks so much for your prayers and encouragement around the three year anniversary of Dave’s death! My mom and aunt visited for a few days to celebrate Dave and comfort me.

I kept their visit as a surprise from Lydia, but the joke was on me. My sister also came…to surprise ME! We had a wonderful visit: shopping, eating yummy food, and sharing stories.

I love how each of our lives interconnect. I’m thankful we encourage and support each other through the ups and downs of Life. I also love a good cup of coffee. 🙂

I don’t need anything fancy! I’ll drink coffee at home with milk, most days. Even better, I enjoy coffee with a friend, sharing stories and experiences, learning from each other.

coffee

What’s more, I love how each of us can impact those around us with the stories of our personal lives. Never underestimate the power or significance of your story.

Whether you enjoy coffee or not, don’t be afraid to share your story with those around you. Even total strangers can benefit!

The night before my visitors arrived, my mom had an interesting conversation with the cashier at a certain store. She was picking up some snacks and a little trinket for Lydia.

“Oh you must be going on a trip!” said the cashier, an older woman.

My mom mentioned the reason for her trip, and told the cashier a little of my story. The lady grew quiet, and said, “My daughter is a younger widow, too. She doesn’t have small children now, but she is having a difficult time.” (Her husband died in a sudden accident.)

My mom is compassionate and understanding in these types of moments. Through the course of their conversation, Mom shared about my blog, and that God has taken such good care of us. We are not angry with God, and keep moving forward.

This prompted the cashier to say, “I don’t really know how to get ahold of God.” So, Mom explained the basic gospel message to her. They chatted a little more. Then, the lady wrote a few things down, and squeezed my mom’s hand as she left.

2 Corinthians 1_3-4

Isn’t God good?! He meets us right where we are, and longs to comfort us. After all, our personal life stories are just a small part of the greater one He is writing.

We overcome by the blood of the Lamb (Jesus!) and the word of our testimony (see Revelation 12:11). As we share our stories, we are healed. But it doesn’t stop there. It is not all about us. Our redemptive stories also bring God glory and bless others. Knowing this makes my pain more bearable!

We have the ability to affirm and speak God’s truth to one another! Once we have worked through our own mess, we become His messengers to others. When infused with His grace and wisdom, our words bring His power to set people free.

Please note: I am not suggesting to “spill your guts” or share other people’s secrets (gossip). If you need help processing your pain, please consider professional input.

latte with heart

“You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives” (Genesis 50:20).

Did you catch that? What was meant for evil—to hurt or stop us—God is working for good. Our pain does not go wasted. God collects each and every tear we cry. If we let Him, God will redeem our experiences and help someone else grow closer to Him, too.

Yes, grief and other emotions are normal. But we cannot stay there. Instead of dwelling on the loss, the anger, the negativity… Take it to Jesus. His love never fails. Let Him walk you through to Victory, and then share what He has done in your life with others.

At the end of you life, the only thing that will matter is your relationship with Jesus Christ, followed by how you treated other people. We can’t take our stuff with us!

Ultimately, the coffee won’t matter, but our stories will.

So speak up. Tell your story. See God heal your heart and touch the lives of others. Our stories (and lessons learned) can change lives—even to the point of eternity.

Isn’t that worth it?

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God of all comfort, thank You for healing our hearts. Give us courage to share the deep parts of our lives with others. Give us wisdom and grace as we encourage and learn from each other. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: If you like coffee, how do you like it best? What part of your personal story (testimony) could be shared to encourage or comfort someone else?

 

The 12-Hour Turnaround

It is amazing what rejuvenation can come from a get-away. Lydia and I spent almost a week in Illinois, while we visited family and a few friends. It was just the ‘reset’ I needed.

Usually, we drive there and back in two days, stopping overnight each time. This adds a couple extra days to our trip—which is fun, but not always feasible. So, this time, we drove for twelve hours all in one day to Illinois and then the same road trip back to Fargo.

Now we have taken this route numerous times in nearly six years. And we have done the long all-day trek several times too. But this time was different.

sunrise from car

On this road trip, I needed a major turnaround. Yes, an attitude readjustment!

It could’ve been related to not sleeping well the night before. Perhaps it was the sense of leaving family and comfort behind. Maybe there were other factors too—like postponing breakfast—but I was in a funky mood at the beginning of the trip!

It was still dark as we started out. After a little while, Lydia fell back asleep. As I listened to her soft snoring, I started to reflect upon all we were driving back toward (in Fargo). There’s nothing like a little distance to give you some perspective!

Before, on the way to Illinois, we were driving toward family. But, as we drove back to Fargo, there was a void. I also realized as the third-year mark of Dave’s death approaches, we have been making these trips without him longer than with him.

I continued thinking about lessons learned, how many things have changed. Lydia has grown so much! Also, at least eight families—much of our support system—have moved away for various reasons. Though, God has been faithful to provide new friends and a wonderful drop-in daycare!

Other aspects of our lives are fairly steady. I’ve taken huge leaps forward, yet I feel there is still so much to do. Sometimes it is overwhelming. Though we love calling Fargo home—and have no plans to move—it has not been without challenges.

As we made our way North, I turned on the radio. I have a SiriusXM subscription which is awesome for traveling. I don’t use it often in Fargo, but on Monday, I was thankful for the encouraging words on The Message (Channel 63).

With God-focused songs, like Trust in You by Lauren Daigle, I knew I needed to give all my fears and frustrations to God. When I fear, I forget God’s faithfulness. But, the truth is, the Lord has been so, so good to me. He is kind, generous, and trustworthy. I don’t have to worry, because the He is in charge of all the details.

two arrows

As the hours rolled by, Lydia and I sang and talked. As I feasted on God’s grace and truth, a weight lifted. The closer we got to Fargo, the more light-hearted I became. Soon I was confident, hopeful, and trusting God again. What a relief knowing I don’t walk this path alone!

God continually gives me opportunities to trust Him at a deeper level. Oddly enough, I found new motivation to make some changes I previously resisted. My resistance is not on purpose, but I can be stubborn!

Being stuck in my car, I was open-minded to make changes regarding my daily routine. It’s funny how sitting in the car all day makes me want to switch up my exercise plan! 😉 Now, I have a renewed vision for Fargo and am excited to see all the Lord has in store!

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up” (Galatians 6:9).

Following God is not always comfortable or easy. But, it is so worth it. God is for me not against me. He gently redirects me when I get off track. I can trust Him because He loves me so much!

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Father God, thanks for Your unrelenting grace and love. Thanks for never giving up on me. Lord, I need You—I cannot make it on my own. Help me trust You more and more. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: What are your favorite music tunes for the car? Has God ever changed your heart during a road trip?

With Appreciation (A Police Tribute)

On Monday morning, I drove with Lydia past an arena no more than three minutes from our house. We go this route nearly every day, but this time, something was unusual at the stop light. Hundreds of police vehicles lined up to honor the first North Dakota police officer killed on duty in 134 years.

Two weeks ago, an officer was wounded during a standoff with a domestic violence suspect. He was 33 years old and had previously served as a combat medic in two deployments. The suspect also died that night.

As our traffic light turned green, we talked about what was happening. “Do you see all those police cars, Lydia? They’re honoring a police officer killed on the job recently.” Being little, she couldn’t understand the impact on our normally quiet community.

But, I teared up with thankfulness and sadness at the sight. It was amazing to see such solidarity in honoring a hero’s life. Thousands of police officers came from several states and Canada. Though, I also grieved because of the tragedy and loss.

blue-light-2

I am so glad for the care shown to the officer’s widow and family. And, I am equally grateful for the acknowledgement of two widows and families suffering.

I pray for strength and peace for both families as they process how the community rallied around them. I pray the public love and support will bring great comfort and healing to these new widows in the coming days.

These tragedies are unifying for several reasons, including the shared loss we feel.

I identify with the officer because of his age. While I did not know him, we could have been classmates. Also, he was married with children; I can relate. I don’t live in the same area as the standoff, but many of my friends do. These days, it just hits home.

Police, firemen, paramedics, EMTs, those in the military, etc. make huge personal sacrifices on a regular basis. Many of these brave men and women start off as volunteers!

Our personal safety is something we often take for granted. But ‘first responders’ are in danger whenever they go to work. They also typically see us at our worst; as such, I’m sure they don’t get thanked enough.

I do not have a police officer in my extended family, but I have close friends who do. I have not personally experienced domestic violence, nor will I pretend to know how that feels. Yet, there are many emotional parallels in times of grief.

While my journey into widowhood has been different, it does help to know you’re not alone. I’m thankful people are pulling together for mutual support and encouragement.

candlelight

As we returned home later Monday afternoon, our normal exit off the highway was blocked. Instead, the police were in a 21-mile procession through Fargo and Moorhead, Minnesota. Once again, I pointed them out to Lydia. It felt like history in the making.

We took the next exit and backtracked home. We reached our intersection again and the police vehicles were still passing through. So, we parked at a grocery store to watch across the street. Lots of other people had the same idea.

Several times over the years I’ve been teary-eyed in my car—usually the result of a song on the radio. It doesn’t happen as often these days…but Monday, I was in good company!

These people put their lives at risk for ours. They seek to protect us and I appreciate all they do for us. It is wonderful to see everyone pay respect to someone who deserves it. Thank you for your service, Officer Moszer. Rest in peace.

“Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13).

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God, thank You for the brave men and women who are called to protect us. Please bless them as they serve. And please provide special comfort and peace to these families and this community. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: Who are the heroes in your life? Have you thanked them lately?

Oh, Come! Let Us Adore Him!

Last Friday night, Lydia and I attended the Phillips, Craig & Dean (with Shaun Groves) concert at our church. As I mentioned in last week’s post about grief, I had debated whether to go or not. This was partially because of Lydia staying up late…and partially because of my grief. In the end, I decided to take her along for a fun experience. I hoped it might get me in the Christmas mood, because I wasn’t “feeling it”…

Well, the night was amazing. These “singing pastors” have been performing for 25 years. So, they sang some older songs and their most recent ones. Of course, they also sang Christmas carols, like ‘O Come All Ye Faithful.’ I was glad I didn’t miss it!

Lydia had fun—I’d say her first concert was a success! I laughed when she asked, “Why isn’t Craig singing?” (I think it was Phillips…) 🙂 I replied, “Because they each have their own part, and it’s not his turn!” My cup “overflowed” with joy, and thankfully, I grabbed some Kleenex before the concert!

I don’t make it to many concerts these days, but I felt like God personally invited me to this one. That evening I heard one word consistently: ADORE. The Lord reminded me of a key principle—worship is all about Him. Lord, don’t let me forget.

PCD_Dec 2015

And to think: I went to the concert to help myself get in the mood for Christmas—you know, to celebrate Jesus’ birth… (Wow! I admit writing that makes my rationale much more horrifying!) Now, grief is necessary and appropriate at times. Even so, I need to keep my eyes on Jesus—not myself or my situation.

Worship is not to help me feel better (though that may occur). It’s not about getting something, falling apart, or keeping it all together. It’s not about the lights, music or singing. It is about giving praise and adoration to the King of Kings…because He is worthy. It’s about being in the presence of Almighty God, my Savior, my Healer, my Comforter , my Redeemer, my Deliverer…the One who makes ALL things right and new.

“Not to us, Lord, not to us but to Your name be the glory, because of Your love and faithfulness” (Psalm 115:1). When we worship God, we give Him glory and magnify His Name. Jesus is the Name above all names (Philippians 2:10). When I recalled how magnificent He is, everything else faded away, unimportant.

I was reminded of the ‘smallness’ of my concerns because Jesus is greater. I am covered by the Prince of Peace. Praise God for His mercy and grace! It was an honor to be there in the presence of the King. He knew just what I needed.

PCD_Dec 2015 worship

“Come near to God and He will come near to you…” (James 4:8).

Christ Jesus the King invites us all to come. Come and behold the One “who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us” (Ephesians 3:20). Perhaps God is asking you to make some changes and switch your focus today. Oh COME! Let us adore Him together!

If you’ve never received an invitation like this, don’t miss it. God offers a new life and a new perspective through His Son, Jesus. Will you accept His personal invitation? Oh come! He is eagerly waiting for you.

If you’re uncertain about God, rest assured. He loves you so much! I can be that friend who introduces you to Him! Leave a comment below, or connect with me on Facebook. I’d love to help you know my Friend, Jesus!

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God, You are slow to anger and rich in love. You are kind and full of compassion; thanks for Your mercy. You have the power to heal and the grace to forgive. There is no one like You, God! You reign forever and ever! King of Glory, receive our full adoration! All glory be unto Your Name! Thank You, Jesus. Amen.

Peaches, Sno-Cones, and Unexpected Grace

Peaches are loaded with nutrients, like potassium, and Vitamins A and C. They are also a good source of fiber. And sno-cones? Ummm…Not so much! They are comprised of sugary syrup, and other not-so-great ingredients…

Now, I am not going to bash sno-cones, but as a dietitian I certainly don’t promote or recommend them. In fact, no real nutritional comparison can be made! So, why link them together with peaches? Because of grace.

 Peaches in a Basket

Peaches remind me of the grace that comes with hospitality. My neighbor, Melissa, lives across the street. She recently brought us some amazing, “juice-dripping-down-your-face” fresh peaches. Melissa had some extras, and didn’t want to waste them. So, she graciously shared them with us. It was totally unexpected, but so appreciated!

I could have made something out of the peaches, though we ended up eating them in all their fuzzy glory. They didn’t last long enough! Yum!

We’ve had great “neighbor-friends” over the years. To start, we’ve shared meals and good stories. Neighbors have helped with yard work and snow removal from time to time. Some have hung pictures or changed light bulbs around the house. They’ve watered my plants; checked the front door for packages; and kept an eye on the house when we travel. A few have even watched Lydia for me in a pinch.

I am so thankful for the help!

Sno-Cone

A few days after the peaches, Lydia and I came across a local park event. It was an outdoor craft fair with many family-friendly events. We enjoyed a horse and carriage ride, music in the park, and perusing the booths. And yes, Lydia had her first sno-cone.

Lydia was excited to be at the park, as it was a last minute decision after our original plans fell through. It was an impromptu event for us, but I realized something. Many of the best times we have are the unplanned, in-the-moment ones.

Part of the definition of grace is that it is undeserved. There is an element of surprise as well—like an unexpected bonus that yields something good that would have otherwise been missed. Grace is in the simple things we so often overlook.

Back to the sno-cone. Lydia didn’t do anything special to deserve it. I was savoring God’s goodness, and enjoying the unexpectedly beautiful and unhurried day. Buying the sno-cone was merely an extension of that.

(For the record, Lydia really wanted to slurp up the leftover liquid (not juice!) at the bottom of the sno-cone cup. But, I declined since she was wearing a white shirt, and I knew would make a mess… And of course, she didn’t need it anyway!) 🙂

Thank You, God, for unexpected grace. Thanks for wonderful neighbors and friends, delicious peaches, and even sno-cones to remind me of the beauty and joy You provide. Help me slow down and notice. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

From Ordinary to Extraordinary

I had a very ordinary life until five years ago, when we moved to Fargo. I come from a close-knit family, and had a great childhood. I grew up in the Midwest. My parents taught me the value of hard work, being on time, and helping others. We went to church regularly, and I count knowing Jesus since I was little as a great blessing.

Dave and I were excited to start a new life in Fargo, though it was difficult leaving our family. Still, we felt like we were on an adventure. It was fun that first year, 2010, experiencing all our new community had to offer.

Becoming parents in late 2011, was a huge adjustment. Being so far from family was a challenge as we entered into the sleepless nights of parenthood. But, soon we adjusted, and Lydia started sleeping through the night.

We had about two weeks of everyone getting adequate sleep, and then Dave got sick. That pushed everything in to high-gear, like never before. I would get up regularly at 4am, just to get a head start on all that needed done each day. At only 5 months old, Lydia needed me for…well…EVERYTHING. Household management, bill paying, and dog duties fell to me. Even Dave needed physical support, in addition to emotional support and encouragement. I also worked two part-time jobs at the time.

Until Dave got his cancer diagnosis, our lives were pretty normal. When our lives were turned upside down, we did the only thing we knew to do. We clung to God for help and survival. And that is where Life became extraordinary…

cross

In terms of faith and trusting God, that is when the rubber met the road. Everything we had built our lives on was tested and tried. It was a physical battle, for sure. But, we saw beyond that to the spiritual implications as well.

Would we turn to God, or turn away from Him? Would He come through for us?

I soon discovered I had several deeply rooted fears. Looking back, I let fear keep me from living my life freely. But, through the cancer journey, God showed me how to tackle each one. I am so thankful.

While cancer was one of the worst things that ever happened to us, we came to see it differently. Even though Dave died, God sustained me every step of the way. When I was prone to doubt, I found hope. When I was prone to fear, I found courage. When my worst fears came true, God was with me and for me.

As the Apostle Paul writes, in 2 Corinthians 12:9: “But he said to me, ’My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” By God’s grace, I am still standing in His strength.