Finding Grace #47

I love the concept of giving God a shout out for what He has done.

We don’t do that nearly enough!

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as “God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense.” Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot. I find grace overflowing in God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

This was a full but good week! Thankfully, the ‘extra’ activities were fun. 🙂 I found myself trying to figure out certain decisions this week. I’m taking it easy today, because I am exhausted from all the processing of options. God reminded me that His timing is perfect… some of the decisions are just not ready to be made yet. And, I want to praise God instead of worry about the unknowns. He always takes such good care of us!

Our extra activities this week included getting together with several friends. I’m thankful for friends who listen and pray with me. I’m thankful we can encourage each other despite life’s uncertainties. I’m thankful for wise counsel and laughter!

We’ve had warmer temperatures this week, in the mid-thirties. We still have a fair amount of snow, but most of the ice has melted off my driveway now. Lydia enjoyed helping me clear it all away with her shovel! And, it is nice to see the grass where small sections of snow have melted! Praise God for the changing of seasons!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Finding Grace #46

I love the concept of giving God a shout out for what He has done.

We don’t do that nearly enough!

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as “God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense.” Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot. I find grace overflowing in God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

This week felt like a blur! Lydia and I had a full week, with our normal activities, but also had some extra events too. This week, I needed some wise counsel before making some decisions. I had the sense these decisions would dictate other important choices and events this year. (Don’t you love all the unknowns in Life’s adventures?!) Praise God, everything went well! Thank You, Lord for wisdom, peace, and clarity as I make decisions and plans!

By Friday night, I was mentally drained from a week of meetings, deciding, and planning. I was exhausted as I drove to a women’s event at church. But since I invited a friend, I knew I needed to go. I’m so glad I did, because I was refreshed as I sang praises to God with so many wonderful ladies. I was encouraged as I listened to three ladies share their stories of God’s faithfulness. I was energized by connecting with old and new friends. It was just what I needed. What grace!

This week I’m extra thankful for Lydia. Everyday, she has used her manners before I reminded her. She has done well entertaining herself without prompting. We’ve had less whining and more cheerfulness. And like her Daddy, she is a great little organizer. Thank You, Jesus! As I decluttered two bathroom drawers, Lydia tossed old items and sorted like-items. I’m proud that she came up with several good ideas on her own!

Today, Lydia and I Skyped with family in Illinois. They were gathered for a belated Christmas party. We didn’t make it home, but are thankful for technology so we could check in! As I hung up, I thought to myself, “I have the best family! Thanks, Lord!”

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Hope and Healing for the Holidays

What a difference a year can make!

This year, my holiday preparations started back in September! One Sunday, I went up front for prayer during the church service. I asked the volunteer couple to pray with me; I was a little nervous about the upcoming holidays.

I needed peace and reassurance, because the entire last quarter of 2015—October through December—was pretty rough grief-wise. So I was praying for a non-repeat.

I’m so glad I asked for prayer.

Praise God, we’ve had by far the best holiday season yet. We’ve had many special moments with family and friends over the years, but this entire season has been good.

It’s not just what we have done—but also what we haven’t done—that’s different. We’ve hosted visitors, attended holiday events, and enjoyed new traditions, sure.

One thing we did not do: Send Christmas cards.

I felt I would have been running short on time to crank out cards to our many loved ones. And because our season has gone well, I decided to be still and take it all in.

Sure, the picture below is unedited (with other peoples’ heads in the way). 🙂 But, I have more peace and joy as-is. Honoring Jesus by not being so stressed feels way better.

Also, this season, Lydia and I reached a happy milestone! We decided to put up the ‘big’ six-foot Christmas tree for the first time in at least five years.

For the last several years, it was just too much physically and emotionally to handle decorating the tree on my own. It brought me more tears than joy. Yet this year feels vastly different—I am grateful for God’s gracious healing!

Last week, my neighbor helped me bring up the tree out of the dusty closet, so Lydia and I could decorate it. Now that she is old enough to understand more, it is so fun to see her excitement! Lydia is delighted with all things Christmas.

For me, this holiday season feels like a gift. It’s like I am seeing things in full color! To be honest, for the first time in years, I am truly excited to celebrate the wonder of Jesus’ birth!!

I am already looking forward to Christmas, without even knowing my exact plans!

Instead of rushing through the season from one event to the next, I’ve taken time to pause and enjoy each moment. We hung a new wreath outside and bought new bright red, Christmas decorations for inside. We’ve played games, made treats and watched holiday movies. It’s been fun!

Dear friend, I pray you are also having a wonderful season of celebration. I hope you are able to feel the joy of Christmas. But, I also know how you feel if this feels like the worst season yet. Last year was unexpectedly difficult for me. So, I’ve been there!

Maybe this year you need to simplify your decorations or buy something new. Or, quite possibly, you might just skip decorating altogether. I understand!

It might be less stressful to stay home for Christmas or maybe you will feel better by traveling to visit loved ones. I’ve done both!

Yes, each season has its own unique challenges. Remember to treat yourself well.

Ask for help, when needed, and adjust your expectations.

If you want to read my holiday posts from last year, click here for the start of my December 2015 posts. I hope you are encouraged!!

You may feel like each day is a battle, when everyone else is laughing and carrying on. You might have to fight just to put on a smile. I get it.

I also know the best thing you can do…. Whether you are facing fear, loneliness, discouragement, or immense sadness, bring it to Jesus.

If you feel like you have nothing to bring to Him for Christmas, bring whatever you have. Your honesty is precious to Him! He can handle it and use it to heal your heart.

Jesus loves you deeply, and He will never leave you alone.

You don’t have to have your life perfect…Just come!

Someday, Life will be good again. It will get better! But, it’s going to take some time to heal. Let our dear Savior King touch your spirit with his grace and love.

Linger in Jesus’ presence. Even if that is all you can do today, that’s okay. The rest will come. Take it one day, one hour, or one minute at a time. Don’t forget to breathe. Conserve your energy, and reserve your best for Jesus.

In the midst of your struggle, God is there. His plan for you is GOOD. Remain close to Him and you will find peace and grace in your time of need.

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Father God, thanks for Your gracious healing. Thanks for making all things new. When our hearts are burdened with grief, pain, or discouragement, remind us to turn to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: Do you have any special holiday traditions? Who, or what, are you missing this season? How can I pray for you?

Tasks: Find someone you trust and ask for prayer. Find a quiet spot and just be still before the Lord. Let Jesus fill your heart with peace.

Here in This Moment

Often, when I write these posts, I have a million things on my mind. Right now, I also have a never-ending list of tasks, such as going through mail, reading a mountain of books, and putting away the dishes. Most of the time, I get started…and then get interrupted.

For example, I might process half the mail, read half a book, and/or unload half the dishwasher…and then I’ll remember I still have the other half of the laundry to finish!

But don’t worry! I will get back to these tasks soon enough…

For now, however, I am enjoying this moment.

psalm-46_10

Currently, it’s so quiet I can hear a clock ticking in the bathroom down the hall. In my home and in my heart, I can feel God’s presence. I’m grateful for His peace.

While I have many things I could do, I am simply sitting still…taking it all in. Everything else can wait. I’m grateful for God’s grace.

As I look all around, I see many blessings. There are blessings in the form of mail from friends and family, and books inviting me to go on a journey. There are dishes from a delicious meal. I see boxes that held Lydia’s birthday gifts. I see bills reminding me of warm water, clean clothes, and electricity. I’m grateful for God’s provision.

Like most people, I have several ongoing decisions to make. Most are routine responsibilities, like monthly budgets, meal planning, and managing our schedule. Sometimes there are bigger decisions, too, that require more prayer. But I won’t worry. Here in this moment, Jesus leads me to Victory! I am grateful for His wisdom and direction.

pillow-and-chair

As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. Her sister, Mary, sat at the Lord’s feet, listening to what he taught. But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, ‘Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.’”

“But the Lord said to her, ‘My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her’” (Luke 10:38-42, NLT).

Yes, instead of thinking of all that needs to be done, I’m going to stay in THIS moment.

I am not procrastinating. Before long, the ‘busy-ness’ will begin again. Something or someone (Lydia) will beckon me. But, for now, this moment is the best place to be!

colorful-mug-with-tea

As I rest, I relinquish any unreasonable expectations for the day. God knows just what I need to accomplish and He is more than able to help me!

As I relax, I release heavy burdens and place them at Jesus’ feet. I realize I don’t have to do ‘everything’ on my own. There is freedom in His love and mercy!

As I relish the calm, I am restored. Jesus renews my energy. He refreshes me with His everlasting strength. His grace is sufficient!

As I refocus my attention and readjust my thoughts, I reconnect with my Heavenly Father who loves me dearly. His Truth is what I need!

Sometimes we all need a quiet moment (or two) to catch our breath. Even when chaos and noise surrounds us, God is always with us morning, noon, or night. So wherever you find yourself today, you can breathe in God’s grace in each moment!

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Father God, in this moment, I turn to You. Draw me close, Lord, and let me feel Your warm embrace. Give me strength as I go about my day. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: How long has it been since you were still in the presence of God?

Tasks: Take a short break and reconnect with God! Enjoy solitude if possible…or pray, journal, listen to soft music, or take a walk if you need. If you have difficulty being still, review and reflect on God’s names and attributes.

A Shield Around Me

Welcome to November! I can hardly believe we are two months from 2017!

This week I have been feeling a little under-the-weather. I’m not sure if it is allergies, or not getting enough sleep, or planting 50 flower bulbs on Sunday for next spring. The tulips and irises should be beautiful if they come up, but the digging and planting left me sore!

It probably doesn’t help that I’ve been staying up late watching the Cubs in the World Series. Wow, it’s been a historic run on several levels! But, it certainly has been a little stressful at times! 🙂 Go Cubbies!

candy

Halloween was fun, but I have mixed feelings about this holiday, and am usually glad when it’s over. I don’t like the scary nature of it, and hate seeing ugly creatures everywhere. But I do enjoy when the kids dress up. And, it’s always fun to see neighbors and greet people!

Candy or not, we should do that more often!

Indeed, I was extra proud of Lydia on Monday night. She dressed up as a fairy this year, and we trick-or-treated with neighbors on our block. Lydia was eager to pass out candy at home, as well. In fact, she was so generous that she worried we’d run out. My little problem solver, she added her own stash of candy… and nearly gave it all away! I had her keep some of her favorites (pictured above), but was glad to see her giving heart!

This week, we’ve had a few more back-to-back early mornings and late nights. All good things, but it does add up. Thankfully, each morning is a new start!

Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life” (Psalm 143:8).

I’m also aware of the fact that the holidays are fast approaching. Last year this season was pretty rough for me (emotionally). I think there were a unique set of reasons it was difficult, and I am hoping this year is better. Thanks for your prayers!

wooden-heart-with-cross

I love what Isaiah 26:3 says, “You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.” I think of this verse often. When I am tired or stressed, or not feeling well physically, my thoughts and emotions can quickly become off-kilter.

So, with all the above, I have been drawing closer to the Lord. When I need a little boost, the best thing I can do is come to Him. His grace is sweet and His love has no bounds!

Lately, I have been taking mini-breaks from whatever I am doing, just to sit and be with Jesus. In these moments, when I am prone to doubt or discouragement, I need extra doses of His love. I might just sit and soak up His word. Or, I might pray, write, cry, or sing.

But one thing is clear: I need to reconnect with the Lord! Jesus comforts and encourages me. He restores and protects my wayward heart. He leads me and gives me peace.

psalm-3_3

I have found The Secret Power of Speaking God’s Word, by Joyce Meyer, to be helpful. This little book has scriptures organized by about fifty topics. There are many categories, like anxiety, worry, stress, or determination, etc.

A book like that makes scripture verses easy to find and meditate upon.

“Wait on the Lord;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the Lord!”

–Psalm 27:14

The sooner I come to Jesus, the faster I am able to refocus and regroup. He is the only thing that does not change in this unpredictable world.

He is my Anchor, my Shield and my Strong Defender! Praise the Lord!

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Lord Jesus, thanks for all You do for me. Please help me rest in Your love and grace. Remind me to come You for refreshment, and seek You first. In Your Name, Amen

Question:  What is your go-to response to stress?

Task: At the very first sign of distress, stop and seek Jesus!

Waiting and the World Series

It’s been really fun watching the Chicago Cubs make it to the World Series. I can feel the excitement in the air! (Though last night’s game was a little disappointing.)

The Cubs franchise certainly knows a lot about hard work… and waiting. But while the roster has changed over the years, the discipline and desire have only grown stronger. It is thrilling to think that their ‘breakthrough’ could be at hand!

cubs-stretch

This week, I saw an interesting connection with my personal life. Lately, the Lord has me revisiting the waiting process too! It seems God is both challenging me and encouraging me, because I keep finding ‘well-timed’ books, articles, or podcasts about waiting on Him.

For example:

Wait and See by Wendy Pope

Waiting on God by Wayne Stiles

If God can help the Chicago Cubs make it to the World Series, I know sooner or later, MY breakthrough will come too, if I don’t give up!

I’ll admit though—it would be much ‘easier’ to just jump ahead in several areas of my life right now. Instead of toiling each day, why not just skip to the reward?

Because waiting serves a purpose.

wrigley-field

(PC: Olivia Paul)

First, the outcome wouldn’t be as sweet if it was always so easy to obtain what we desire. On the plus side, most of us will never have to wait 108 years for a breakthrough! 😉

Second, waiting proves that the best things are worth the effort. Think of all the practice the Cubs have put in, both as a team and individually!

Third, waiting builds character so we can keep what we have worked for. We grow spiritual fruit, too. Negative attitudes, hidden motives, and bad habits are uncovered, which could otherwise hinder us from moving forward into what God has for us.

Galatians 6:9 says, “And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart.” Waiting on God is not ‘doing nothing.’ It is taking active steps in the right direction, but pacing ourselves according to His timing.

Think of it as training camp!

baseballs

But waiting itself can feel quite challenging, because we want to move on to bigger, better, and often, more exciting things. Maybe you are stuck in the outfield currently, but don’t overlook what God is doing—He is equipping you for greatness.

“Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way” (James 1:2-4, MSG).

In our fast-paced society, waiting longer than we think we should have to can feel unjust. Why me?! If we wait long enough, we tend to doubt ourselves and our abilities. But it’s not about us—or the outcome. In the end, what we learn about God and ourselves is most important.

When we are stretched to our limit, we find God’s grace and supply know no bounds. As we refocus on His ability to see us through, we remember Jesus’ faithfulness. His timing is perfect timing and His plans for us are good!

Waiting can leave us feeling weak and worn out. But in Jesus, we already have ultimate Victory. So, we can enjoy life while we rely on His everlasting strength!

ephesians-3_20

Waiting can make us question the validity of our dreams—or even our calling. But, we can trust Jesus to develop us and lead us through each trial. He is trustworthy. And, we can leave the results to Him, because He is able to do abundantly more than all we ask or imagine (see Ephesians 3:20)!

I don’t know what you are struggling with today—or waiting for. Perhaps you need healing, provision, or a promotion. Jesus hears your prayers and cares about every little detail of your life. Ask Him to help you maximize your waiting period so you are fully prepared to step in to all He has planned for you!

It is coming!!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for always working on my behalf. Thanks for all you teach me while I am waiting. Help me remember that Your plan for me is good—and the best things take time. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions:  Are you relying on God in your waiting period? What might you learn in the process?

Tasks: Write down all the benefits of waiting in your current phase of life. Review it when you are tempted to rush ahead of God’s timing!

Turning Trials into Triumph

Happy September! We had a great first day of preschool on Tuesday! Of course, Lydia did awesome. I kept it together (mostly) and tried to enjoy the change of pace as well!

First Day of Preschool 2016

Though, on Monday, Lydia played with several friends in the neighborhood. One last hurrah! Thankfully, Lydia was out of earshot when a little girl asked me:

Where’s her father?

Surprised at the question, I explained that he had been sick and is now in heaven. The little girl nodded her head with genuine concern and said, “Oh… that happened to my dog, too!” And then she went back to playing with the other kids.

What a perceptive little girl! She must’ve known all the other dads were at work. While I didn’t expect her question, I was glad she had the courage to ask. Her cute little response made me smile!

Then, on Monday night, Lydia and I talked about preschool as we ate dinner. I told Lydia how proud of her Dave would be. I also reminded her of what she could say if someone asks about him. It doesn’t happen often, but I want her to be comfortable and prepared.

After we laid out Lydia’s new outfit, a sparkly green dress, I painted her nails to match. Then, we read The Night Before Preschool and said our prayers. Lydia was asleep in no time. She was ready

crayons

ME, on the other hand?Let’s just say I needed some time with Jesus!

There wasn’t anything really ‘wrong.’ I was excited for Lydia!

But emotions welled up as I reflected on how far we’ve come—and my conversation with our new little friend. The actual words hadn’t bothered me; it was an honest question. But I was upset that we had to have the conversation. A subtle difference, sure!

I couldve wallowed there for quite some time. Ahem. But I didn’t. I took it to Jesus, because I know He loves me so much. And praise God, He helped me turn it around!

I gave Him my sadness and concerns. I chose to praise the Lord with thankfulness instead. Then, slowly my heart grew glad as He reminded me that He will go with Lydia.

And, yes, He’s got this!

Psalm 145_13

Now I’m taking a *wild* guess here, but I bet you are facing some changes or challenges of your own. Maybe it’s a really good transition you have been praying about, like a new job or school. Or, perhaps there are heavy burdens on your heart—things you didn’t see coming. An unexpected circumstance popped up and you don’t know what to do. Maybe you have been dealing with the same difficulties for awhile with no relief in sight.

Don’t worry. God’s got this!

At the beginning of the school year, teachers often conduct a basic review to assess what  students have already learned. It can also be helpful for us to review all the trials God has brought us through. When we see our circumstances in the light of His goodness, we can see He has a plan. And, we can trust Him more going forward.

The Lord excels at turning trials into triumph!

(To be clear, I don’t look at how far I have brought myself, for that is not worth much.)

It’s the Lord who has carried me all these years. He is my Shepherd!

When I don’t know what to do, He is my Wonderful Counselor and Prince of Peace.

His Presence is always with me, and He will never leave me to fend for myself.

When I am afraid, He is Protector, my Shield, my Refuge, and my Defense.

He loves me with an everlasting love. (Which is A LOT!!)

I know God has good plans—filled with hope—for my future.

He always keeps His promises; He is faithful to complete every good work He starts.

Yes, it’s safe to say Lydia’s in good hands this year. Besides having wonderful, caring teachers, God’s got her covered. Of course He does…He loves her even more than I do!

And if you let Him, God will take good care of you too!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for all the ways You care for us. Help us make the most of these new opportunities. Help us grow in grace. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: What changes or challenges are you facing? Do you believe God can handle it?

A Note to My 29 Year-Old Self

This week I am celebrating! Not only is it my birthday week, it’s also the one year mark of making my blog public. Can you believe it?! I feel it is still a work in progress, but I am so grateful for you all. Thanks for sticking with me! 🙂

birthday candles

Dave often celebrated my birthday week. That’s because one year, he forgot the exact date and decided to give me gifts every day! He was pretty smooth like that.

These days, celebrating my birthday, like many other things, is different without him.

Typically, I’ll eat lunch with a friend, talk with lots of friends and family, and get a massage. This year, I am also taking Lydia to a local (minor league) baseball game. She’s been asking to go all summer, and the fireworks at the end might be a special perk!

Around my birthday, I like to look back on the last year and set some goals for the next. For whatever reason, this week I also considered all that has happened since moving to Fargo six years ago this month. It’s bittersweet.

Grace mug_Eph 2-8

I have noticed many major life events have occurred since my 29th birthday. In short:

I was twenty-nine when Lydia was born. While Dave and I were thrilled to be parents, the sleeplessness threw us for a loop! Five months later, we were just starting to sleep well when Dave was diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer. After 364 days of fighting cancer with Dave, I became a widow and single mom at the age of thirty.

Hence, the last few years have been a continual adjustment (and readjustment). So much has changed. But far be it from me to complain!

chocolate cupcake

Have you ever wished you could tell your former self how something works out? Hindsight brings clarity! I can’t explain it all in a simple blog post, but God has been so good to us.

Someday I’ll have all the words… but not today. So for now, with much gratitude, here’s a note I wrote to my 29 year-old self!

Hello, dear Self,

I know you cannot comprehend all that the next few years entail. You can’t possibly fathom the pain and struggles that lie ahead. But God does—and He’s got this.

You don’t realize this now, but fear has been a constant presence lurking in the back of your mind. It limits your decisions at times.

Yet God knows this—and He’s going to free you from all your fears. What’s more, as He destroys old mindsets, you will learn to walk in Victory. The whole process will certainly be scary, but He will lead you through. Trust Him!

Sometimes, this journey will make you question everything you believe about God. But He is big enough to handle your doubts and fears, your anger and resentment.

He’s got this.

There will be moments you can barely breathe. You won’t know how you’re going to make it. When you think you cannot take anymore, you’re right. But take it to Jesus. He is your hope and firm anchor. Let Him carry the burden for you. He cares for you deeply and knows exactly what you need.

When you feel like giving up or running away, stand firm. The battle belongs to the Lord. He is your shield, your protector, and your defense. He’s got you covered!

When everything falls apart, you will see God holding together what remains. He is your rock and your salvation! Everything that really matters is secure in Him.

Yes, dear Self, life gets rough up ahead. It can feel quite heavy at times. But don’t worry. God’s got this! In fact, there is much good along the way.

New goals and dreams, new purposes and plans. Long-awaited answers to prayer.

God will use these experiences to show you just how much He loves you. He will prove His love and power are stronger than any difficult thing you will (ever) face.

 And yes, He’s absolutely got this!

It won’t be easy, but in time, you will see the pattern of grace. From this side of it all, it actually IS amazing. When the dust settles, you will be grateful. And despite all odds, you will still wake up with wonder at this life you get to live. What a gift!

What felt like defeat, was really training grounds for a new path. Where there was doubt, trust will deepen. In place of despair, hope will rise. In the midst of pain, you will find peace and beauty. You will flourish!

Praise God—He’s got this!

So do not be afraid, dear Self. You are always loved, never alone. God will not falter. His mercies are new every morning, and His grace is more than enough.

Keep your head held high, because the best is yet to come. God is working all this for good, even when you don’t see how. It will be beyond your wildest imagination!

Seek God’s grace and goodness each day. Rejoice in the Lord’s unfailing love and faithfulness! Most of all, hold on tight to Jesus.

Cling to Him for He is your strength and your life.

And you know what? He’s got this!!

XOXO,

Your 30-something Self

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Gracious God, thank You for bringing me through with Victory. I celebrate your loving kindness—You are so good to me! Bless this next year and help me live for you! In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you ever written yourself a note like this? What words of wisdom would you write?

It Is Well

In a few days, it will be three years since my late husband died of colon cancer. As such, I’ve been reflecting on our journey these last few years. Lydia and I think and talk about Dave often. And, I consider all the ways God helped us and came through for us.

I’ve also been thinking about how we honored Dave’s life at his funeral. Dave had no preferences, leaving the details up to me. My mom helped me choose the flowers, and I asked my dad to speak during the service. I picked out the songs.

Dave obit pic

I chose “Give Me Jesus,” because at the end of his life, Dave was still sure of his faith. Shortly before he died, when asked if there was anything he needed, Dave’s response was: I just want Jesus.

The other two songs were classic hymns: “Victory in Jesus” and a personal favorite, “It Is Well with My Soul.” They felt like anthems proclaiming God’s goodness and faithfulness.

Somehow, in the midst of my grief, I looked past my pain to believe God still had a good plan for me and Lydia…though I could not see or understand what that was.

These songs inspire me to praise and trust God…when things go well and when they don’t. First day. Last day. Best day. Worst day. He is constant. Just…give…me…Jesus.

Psalm 28_7

Lately, I’ve been singing a newer version of “It Is Well,” a powerful song from Bethel Music. Lydia was too little three years ago to know we sang the original (classic) version at her Daddy’s funeral. Nonetheless, it has been moving to hear her belt out some of the lyrics!

I am simply amazed at how far God has brought us. He is still with us, showing us the path ahead. He has never left me alone to fend for myself. God has held me close, a strong and steady anchor in the storms of life. I’m so thankful for His help!

That first year without Dave was a struggle, though each year has had its own challenges. At one point, I wrote down a set of personal statements, which felt like drawing a line in the sand.

I posted little notes all over the house, and declared them out loud, often several times a day. They helped me refocus on the Lord in my deepest grief. I still review them often!

It is well

Today, I am sharing them with you. I hope they help you, too, in your tough moments. God’s promises fill us with hope. Therefore, I linked a few Bible verses after each sentence if you would like to read and ponder them.

I trust You, Jesus.

Psalm 28:7, Proverbs 3:5, Isaiah 26:4, Nahum 1:7

Lord, I need You.

Psalm 9:18, Psalm 40:17, Psalm 72:12

I will wait for You.

Psalm 27:14, Psalm 33:20, Micah 7:7

You’ve never failed before!

Exodus 14:14, Joshua 21:45, Luke 1:37

I receive Your peace and provision.

Numbers 6:24-26Job 10:12, Psalm 29:11, Isaiah 26:3

stormy sea

Do you feel defeated today? Perhaps life looks anything but well. I’ve been there. Yet, as my dad so poignantly said at his beloved son-in-law’s funeral:

You don’t have to have all the answers to walk by faith.”

You may be experiencing peace and quiet today, or tossing to and fro. Either way, take it to Jesus. Cling to Him in both the calm and the chaos. He is the King!

As you trust in God’s love for you, stand firm on His promises. He will bring You through with Victory. And, I pray that you, too, will soon be able to say: “It is well with me.”

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God, thank You for your loyal and unwavering love. You are so good. As we speak Your truth over our circumstances, may we rest in Your grace and peace. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: When facing life’s uncertainties, do you turn to God first…or last? How can I pray for you today?

The 12-Hour Turnaround

It is amazing what rejuvenation can come from a get-away. Lydia and I spent almost a week in Illinois, while we visited family and a few friends. It was just the ‘reset’ I needed.

Usually, we drive there and back in two days, stopping overnight each time. This adds a couple extra days to our trip—which is fun, but not always feasible. So, this time, we drove for twelve hours all in one day to Illinois and then the same road trip back to Fargo.

Now we have taken this route numerous times in nearly six years. And we have done the long all-day trek several times too. But this time was different.

sunrise from car

On this road trip, I needed a major turnaround. Yes, an attitude readjustment!

It could’ve been related to not sleeping well the night before. Perhaps it was the sense of leaving family and comfort behind. Maybe there were other factors too—like postponing breakfast—but I was in a funky mood at the beginning of the trip!

It was still dark as we started out. After a little while, Lydia fell back asleep. As I listened to her soft snoring, I started to reflect upon all we were driving back toward (in Fargo). There’s nothing like a little distance to give you some perspective!

Before, on the way to Illinois, we were driving toward family. But, as we drove back to Fargo, there was a void. I also realized as the third-year mark of Dave’s death approaches, we have been making these trips without him longer than with him.

I continued thinking about lessons learned, how many things have changed. Lydia has grown so much! Also, at least eight families—much of our support system—have moved away for various reasons. Though, God has been faithful to provide new friends and a wonderful drop-in daycare!

Other aspects of our lives are fairly steady. I’ve taken huge leaps forward, yet I feel there is still so much to do. Sometimes it is overwhelming. Though we love calling Fargo home—and have no plans to move—it has not been without challenges.

As we made our way North, I turned on the radio. I have a SiriusXM subscription which is awesome for traveling. I don’t use it often in Fargo, but on Monday, I was thankful for the encouraging words on The Message (Channel 63).

With God-focused songs, like Trust in You by Lauren Daigle, I knew I needed to give all my fears and frustrations to God. When I fear, I forget God’s faithfulness. But, the truth is, the Lord has been so, so good to me. He is kind, generous, and trustworthy. I don’t have to worry, because the He is in charge of all the details.

two arrows

As the hours rolled by, Lydia and I sang and talked. As I feasted on God’s grace and truth, a weight lifted. The closer we got to Fargo, the more light-hearted I became. Soon I was confident, hopeful, and trusting God again. What a relief knowing I don’t walk this path alone!

God continually gives me opportunities to trust Him at a deeper level. Oddly enough, I found new motivation to make some changes I previously resisted. My resistance is not on purpose, but I can be stubborn!

Being stuck in my car, I was open-minded to make changes regarding my daily routine. It’s funny how sitting in the car all day makes me want to switch up my exercise plan! 😉 Now, I have a renewed vision for Fargo and am excited to see all the Lord has in store!

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up” (Galatians 6:9).

Following God is not always comfortable or easy. But, it is so worth it. God is for me not against me. He gently redirects me when I get off track. I can trust Him because He loves me so much!

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Father God, thanks for Your unrelenting grace and love. Thanks for never giving up on me. Lord, I need You—I cannot make it on my own. Help me trust You more and more. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: What are your favorite music tunes for the car? Has God ever changed your heart during a road trip?