Category: Wisdom

Posted on in Books and Movies I Like, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom, Worship

A Shield Around Me

Welcome to November! I can hardly believe we are two months from 2017!

This week I have been feeling a little under-the-weather. I’m not sure if it is allergies, or not getting enough sleep, or planting 50 flower bulbs on Sunday for next spring. The tulips and irises should be beautiful if they come up, but the digging and planting left me sore!

It probably doesn’t help that I’ve been staying up late watching the Cubs in the World Series. Wow, it’s been a historic run on several levels! But, it certainly has been a little stressful at times! 🙂 Go Cubbies!

candy

Halloween was fun, but I have mixed feelings about this holiday, and am usually glad when it’s over. I don’t like the scary nature of it, and hate seeing ugly creatures everywhere. But I do enjoy when the kids dress up. And, it’s always fun to see neighbors and greet people!

Candy or not, we should do that more often!

Indeed, I was extra proud of Lydia on Monday night. She dressed up as a fairy this year, and we trick-or-treated with neighbors on our block. Lydia was eager to pass out candy at home, as well. In fact, she was so generous that she worried we’d run out. My little problem solver, she added her own stash of candy… and nearly gave it all away! I had her keep some of her favorites (pictured above), but was glad to see her giving heart!

This week, we’ve had a few more back-to-back early mornings and late nights. All good things, but it does add up. Thankfully, each morning is a new start!

“Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life” (Psalm 143:8).

I’m also aware of the fact that the holidays are fast approaching. Last year this season was pretty rough for me (emotionally). I think there were a unique set of reasons it was difficult, and I am hoping this year is better. Thanks for your prayers!

wooden-heart-with-cross

I love what Isaiah 26:3 says, “You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.” I think of this verse often. When I am tired or stressed, or not feeling well physically, my thoughts and emotions can quickly become off-kilter.

So, with all the above, I have been drawing closer to the Lord. When I need a little boost, the best thing I can do is come to Him. His grace is sweet and His love has no bounds!

Lately, I have been taking mini-breaks from whatever I am doing, just to sit and be with Jesus. In these moments, when I am prone to doubt or discouragement, I need extra doses of His love. I might just sit and soak up His word. Or, I might pray, write, cry, or sing.

But one thing is clear: I need to reconnect with the Lord! Jesus comforts and encourages me. He restores and protects my wayward heart. He leads me and gives me peace.

psalm-3_3

I have found The Secret Power of Speaking God’s Word, by Joyce Meyer, to be helpful. This little book has scriptures organized by about fifty topics. There are many categories, like anxiety, worry, stress, or determination, etc.

A book like that makes scripture verses easy to find and meditate upon.

“Wait on the Lord;
Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart;
Wait, I say, on the Lord!”

–Psalm 27:14

The sooner I come to Jesus, the faster I am able to refocus and regroup. He is the only thing that does not change in this unpredictable world.

He is my Anchor, my Shield and my Strong Defender! Praise the Lord!

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Lord Jesus, thanks for all You do for me. Please help me rest in Your love and grace. Remind me to come You for refreshment, and seek You first. In Your Name, Amen

Question:  What is your go-to response to stress?

Task: At the very first sign of distress, stop and seek Jesus!

Posted on in Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Procrastination, Wisdom

The Art of Waiting Well

On most Sundays after church, Lydia and I eat lunch and discuss what we learned or did that morning. This week was no different, except, Lydia couldn’t quite recall what Bible story she learned in her class that day.

“Hmmm…let me think…” she said. “Well, there were two girls and a boy.”

That really didn’t ring a bell for me! So I asked Lydia to explain more.

She said, “Um, one girl lived really far away. And, she decided to go home. Then, the other girl told her, ‘Well, I won’t leave you here.”

Lydia continued, “And she told the first girl, ‘So how about I just go with you?!’”

field

I laughed with realization, and half-guessed, “Oh, are you talking about Ruth and Naomi?!”

“Yeah… I think so…” Lydia went on, “And then there was a boy too…” She couldn’t remember anymore details about him!

I loved Lydia’s little paraphrase and the details she focused on. I gave her a quick overview of Naomi, Ruth, Boaz, and Baby Obed. Then, with motherly emphasis, I told her,

“Think about how much Ruth would have missed if she had given up!”

Instantly, I also sensed a lesson for me too.

My circumstances are vastly different, but I understand how difficult it might have been for these two ladies to consistently make good decisions, move forward, and trust God. I’m sure it felt like the odds were stacked against them.

Generally speaking, Lydia and I do well most days. But there are days and seasons when we struggle. The pressure to quit tends to go through cycles, and my determination can wane.

Mostly, these are normal challenges we all face…one way or another.

checkmate

Of course, it’s often easier to procrastinate or abandon a time-consuming project, than stick with it and see it through. It’s hard to hold onto dreams or goals that take a lot of effort…when it takes forever to see results.

I have found most ‘God-projects’ take awhile, though…and are worth it.

It’s also easier as a parent to give in to your child’s demands, rather than stick with the appropriate discipline. It’s another long-term commitment!

But the constant pressure of these challenges can quickly wear me down.

We may have unique struggles, but all of us can feel discouraged and defeated at times.

Some days I go ‘on my merry way’ and everything just works out just fine. But on tough days, it can be tempting to run away (ignore the problems altogether) or run ahead of God (try to fix the problems on my own).

Still, there is a hidden blessing when challenges come.

Yes, that’s when I most remember I need God’s help. In fact, I can be thankful for those times, too, because they help me draw near to Him! When I want to run and hide, let me run to Jesus!

As we come to Him in our weakness, He infuses us with His strength.

The Lord might move in my situation…or He might move me. But I need to let Him make the decision…not me! As I stand firm and wait for Him to act, He prepares me for greater things:

Victory!

As I cling to Jesus, He refines my character and makes me more like Him. The Lord is faithful. Whatever happens, He will work it out for my good and His glory!

patience-is-the-art-of-waiting-well-2

There’s waiting, and then there’s waiting well. While I wait, I can:

Pray for wisdom, grace, and perseverance.

Seek God’s input first. Then ask for outside help, if needed.

Focus…and refocus…on Jesus. He’s the ultimate goal!

Commit my steps to Him. Trust Him for perfect timing.

Remember: I can do difficult things!

Have a good attitude, and make lemonade!

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Jesus, thanks for Your grace and strength. Instead of running away or running ahead, help me to run directly to You, Lord. Help me not miss all the good things You have planned for me! Help me persevere. In Your Name, Amen.

Questions: What difficult circumstance(s) are you facing now, that make you want to give up? How can you wait well, with patience and perseverance?

Tasks: Write down your dream or goal. Then, consider what is at stake if you give up. Memorize Philippians 4:13, or another favorite Bible verse.

Posted on in Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Wisdom

Like A Canvas

A few days ago, I took a social media quiz to determine my so-called ‘life quote’. I’m sure you’ve seen similar ‘tests’ regarding personality traits, how good of a friend you are, etc. I generally avoid them, but got sucked into this one nonetheless. 🙂

This is what my results showed:

“Your life is like a canvas: every morning it is up to you to decide if you like to keep on painting the same old picture or create a new one.”

wildflower-fresco

While I don’t think this quote is the ultimate reflection of who I am, it stood out for several reasons. First, I hadn’t seen this quote before, so it made me stop and think.

Second, I have been pleasantly surprised at how much of a mood lifter the recent changes to my home have been. I have seen the value in changing my surroundings, which has prompted me to be open to change in other areas of my life.

Third, the idea of keeping the status quo or creating a new opportunity reminded me of a fun mom’s night out with friends two years ago. A local artist hosted a painting night, with a predetermined picture as the goal.

There were two options and I since I am not super crafty, I decided to go with the easier choice. The end result was supposed to be a silhouette of two song birds on a branch or wire. The little birds looked very cozy against an azure background.

I thought it was so cute, similar to this cheery picture I recently bought for my home.

happy-birds-on-a-wire

At the beginning of our painting session, my friends and I were given the same size canvas and amount of paint, and the same directions and materials. It seemed fairly easy, and the artist gave us pointers as needed.

All was going well until…

I added too much white paint to the blue! I started spreading it around but that only made it worse. Of course I kept smearing the white paint, trying to blend it in…

As you can tell in the picture (below), my results looked nothing like the original plan! I tried to make the birds and the branches. But, it turned into a big mess. Soon, I took a step back and considered my options.

I could keep going and hope the old plan worked out—or I could go another direction entirely. The second option—the obvious choice—was a much better fit for my skill level…

above-the-chaos

Ok, clearly I’m not meant to be a painter! Stop laughing and let me explain!

I decided the white against the dark blue looked a little like a thunderstorm clouds. Or, possibly, a turbulent ocean… I couldn’t quite decide. 😉

Either way, I felt it represented a sense of turmoil.

In the end, I painted tiny v-shaped birds at the top of the clouds (or waves?!) to signify rising above the chaos. I wrote ‘Isaiah 40:31’ in the corner, and decided that was the best I could do! Whew!

isaiah-40_31

As I think about that experience and the ‘life quote’ above, there are a few parallels.

Sometimes our life ‘canvas’ looks good. The brush strokes match up just as we envisioned. Occasionally, smudges or spills can make a big mess—and we feel like we have to start over. But, often, those creations turn out to be the most interesting.

Perhaps we just have to reframe the failure or make it into a new picture!

You might have to take a second look to see the hidden beauty and potential amidst all the smudges. You might not understand all that has happened in your life or how it could possibly turn out well.

Rest assured. You might not see God’s hand in it all. But, trust me—He’s there! He cares deeply about you and is the Master of second chances. It might not look perfect, but God can make our lives into a beautiful masterpiece as we rise above the chaos.

lydia-artwork

The key is letting Him show us what to keep (the old) and what to change (make new). Thank God, the final result is more dependent on Him leading us than our artistic talent!

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God, thanks for seeing the beauty within us and for developing it in our lives. Thanks for second chances and new direction. Please continue making us—and remaking us—like You.  In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: When it comes to being artistic, do you prefer painting, drawing, photography, music, writing, food, or something else? Did you ever have a project that required a do-over…or a complete overhaul?

Task: Make something creative today!

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Journey of Grace, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Wisdom, Worship

Turning Trials into Triumph

Happy September! We had a great first day of preschool on Tuesday! Of course, Lydia did awesome. I kept it together (mostly) and tried to enjoy the change of pace as well!

First Day of Preschool 2016

Though, on Monday, Lydia played with several friends in the neighborhood. One last hurrah! Thankfully, Lydia was out of earshot when a little girl asked me:

“Where’s her father?”

Surprised at the question, I explained that he had been sick and is now in heaven. The little girl nodded her head with genuine concern and said, “Oh… that happened to my dog, too!” And then she went back to playing with the other kids.

What a perceptive little girl! She must’ve known all the other dads were at work. While I didn’t expect her question, I was glad she had the courage to ask. Her cute little response made me smile!

Then, on Monday night, Lydia and I talked about preschool as we ate dinner. I told Lydia how proud of her Dave would be. I also reminded her of what she could say if someone asks about him. It doesn’t happen often, but I want her to be comfortable and prepared.

After we laid out Lydia’s new outfit, a sparkly green dress, I painted her nails to match. Then, we read The Night Before Preschool and said our prayers. Lydia was asleep in no time. She was ready…

crayons

ME, on the other hand? …Let’s just say I needed some time with Jesus!

There wasn’t anything really ‘wrong.’ I was excited for Lydia!

But emotions welled up as I reflected on how far we’ve come—and my conversation with our new little friend. The actual words hadn’t bothered me; it was an honest question. But I was upset that we had to have the conversation. A subtle difference, sure!

I could’ve wallowed there for quite some time. Ahem. But I didn’t. I took it to Jesus, because I know He loves me so much. And praise God, He helped me turn it around!

I gave Him my sadness and concerns. I chose to praise the Lord with thankfulness instead. Then, slowly my heart grew glad as He reminded me that He will go with Lydia.

And, yes, He’s got this!

Psalm 145_13

Now I’m taking a *wild* guess here, but I bet you are facing some changes or challenges of your own. Maybe it’s a really good transition you have been praying about, like a new job or school. Or, perhaps there are heavy burdens on your heart—things you didn’t see coming. An unexpected circumstance popped up and you don’t know what to do. Maybe you have been dealing with the same difficulties for awhile with no relief in sight.

Don’t worry. God’s got this!

At the beginning of the school year, teachers often conduct a basic review to assess what  students have already learned. It can also be helpful for us to review all the trials God has brought us through. When we see our circumstances in the light of His goodness, we can see He has a plan. And, we can trust Him more going forward.

The Lord excels at turning trials into triumph!

(To be clear, I don’t look at how far I have brought myself, for that is not worth much.)

It’s the Lord who has carried me all these years. He is my Shepherd!

When I don’t know what to do, He is my Wonderful Counselor and Prince of Peace.

His Presence is always with me, and He will never leave me to fend for myself.

When I am afraid, He is Protector, my Shield, my Refuge, and my Defense.

He loves me with an everlasting love. (Which is A LOT!!)

I know God has good plans—filled with hope—for my future.

He always keeps His promises; He is faithful to complete every good work He starts.

Yes, it’s safe to say Lydia’s in good hands this year. Besides having wonderful, caring teachers, God’s got her covered. Of course He does…He loves her even more than I do!

And if you let Him, God will take good care of you too!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for all the ways You care for us. Help us make the most of these new opportunities. Help us grow in grace. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: What changes or challenges are you facing? Do you believe God can handle it?

Posted on in Miscellaneous, Parenting, Wisdom

Growing Pains and Preschool Perspectives

As we quickly move through August, I am keenly aware of the changes coming in just a few short weeks. While my work schedule has been flexible these last few years, soon we will have to live with a little more structure each day.

Yes, Lydia is going to preschool!

This will be the biggest change we’ve had in quite awhile. We are both excited for the transition, but undoubtedly, there will be a learning curve.

Lydia needed only a few items on her school list, but I made a big deal about purchasing them. “Mom, I can’t believe you let me pick out this purple binder! Thank you so much!”

I’m excited to see how she learns, grows, and changes this fall.

Ironically, I’ve been both frustrated and so very proud of Lydia within the last week…sometimes in the same afternoon!

Redhawks game

On Monday, we went to her much anticipated dentist appointment. Lydia had SO been looking forward to it for weeks, and has been diligently brushing and trying to floss her teeth so the dentist is proud of her. Pretty adorable.

This, however, was in direct contrast to a few nights before when I sent her straight to bed with no snack. Sobbing, she told me that she didn’t get to brush her teeth…

“But mom, I don’t want to get any CALORIES!!”

Of course, she meant CAVITIES, but I stifled a laugh and let her brush her teeth anyway. 🙂

The dentist appointment went well, and I was pleased with her behavior. She picked out a new toothbrush, new toothpaste, a toy, a sticker… and more floss. Of course!

I thought we’d go to a couple of stores to return some items. Lydia did alright until she saw the cinnamon rolls at the mall. Within a few minutes she had a meltdown and fell asleep in the car. I thought she might be getting sick… Nope. Just cranky!

Or maybe it is ‘growing pains’…

Lydia might going through another growth spurt. She seems extra hungry, cranky and tired lately. In fact, I was surprised to discover this week she has already grown three inches since her birthday last fall!

dentist_Aug 2016

Yes, my little girl is growing up. I’m proud of her for being brave while trying new things. I’m pleased when she requests green peas and devours eggplant lasagna. I’m thrilled when she says ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ without being reminded.

But I am also cognizant of how difficult growing up can be. Because she is tall for her age, she looks older. So often, people expect her to act a certain way. Generally, she behaves well, but she does have the occasional preschool meltdown. She’s normal!

I love Lydia’s observant nature, her willingness to help, and her joyous laughter. She loves playing with her friends outside. However, Lydia is fairly social and doesn’t always remember that each family has different rules or goals…and bedtimes. (Nor does she realize why I want her to keep practicing riding her bike without training wheels!)

It's hard being a mom when you have kids.

Lydia thinks that being a mom equates to being an adult. So often she will say, “When I am a mom, I will get to…” versus saying “When I grow up, I will…”

Perhaps that’s because she’s aware of ‘mom privileges’ like staying up later…using the phone and computer…and getting the last bite of dessert! (ahem)

One day, I was trying to get Lydia ready and myself too. We were running late and I was hurrying the process. Perceptively, she blurted out, “It’s HARD being a mom when you have kids!” I laughed and it lightened my load at the time.

Even in the difficult moments, I am so grateful for Lydia.

In many ways, she helped pull me forward after Dave died. I guess I didn’t have much choice. Being so little, she still needed me to do everything for her!

Now she is getting older and is capable of doing most of those things on her own.

I’ve learned so much about God’s love for me by watching Lydia process life. I regularly pray for wisdom in raising her. I also pray for her precious little heart.

As she continues to grow, so do I. And sometimes, I have growing pains too! But praise God, I don’t have to do this parenting thing without His help.

“He will feed his flock like a shepherd. He will carry the lambs in his arms, holding them close to his heart. He will gently lead the mother sheep with their young” (Isaiah 40:11, NLT).

Over time, we have learned to communicate our frustrations and talk through our difficult moments. It is a blessing when Lydia acknowledges her bad attitude, asks for forgiveness, and prays for God’s help to do better. Clearly, I have had to do the same!

It IS hard being a parent. Especially when kids are involved! 😉 But it can be really good too. And even in the tough times, there is much to be grateful for.

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God, thanks for Your grace and patience! Please continue to lead us along the right path. Give me wisdom as I raise this dear child you have given me! In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: What are some lessons you have learned from being a parent (or aunt/uncle)? Do you pray for your children?

Posted on in Miscellaneous, Travel, Wisdom

Tires, Target, and Thankfulness

Last week was an expensive week in the car repair department. Before you think I am complaining, let me explain why I am so grateful!

On our most recent road trip back to Fargo, a warning light came on during a thunderstorm. It said my tire pressure was low, but I did not have a flat tire. We were still over two hours from home. I checked all my tires each time we stopped; they looked fine.

I’ve had plenty of flats on other cars over the years, and am pretty good at changing tires! Thanks, Dad! But changing tires far from home and with a child is different.

pile of tires

After we returned home from our trip, I noticed a nail in the rear driver-side tire. Great. This was the third time in less than one year that I have run over a nail. But by God’s grace, I’ve never had a flat tire on this car! Soon, I had made an appointment to fix my tire.

Back in May, I was getting an oil change and was told that I would need new tires by this fall. I was surprised because I didn’t think they would wear down that quickly. We’ve taken several road trips over the last few years, but I didn’t expect to need new tires so soon. But yes, apparently putting over 35,000 miles on your car will do that!

That day I received a quote for new tires, but thought I would wait. It was a lot of money!

Before this most recent appointment, however, I reviewed the quote for new tires. As I researched tire options, I realized the cost was average for tires and the labor seemed very fair. Still not convinced that I really needed new tires, I did the penny trick. This is where you see how much of Lincoln’s head is seen, which translates to how much tread is left. Guess what. ALL of Lincoln’s head was showing!

Yep, I had not noticed it before, but my tire tread was almost bare!

Psalm 25_4

While I certainly needed to get the one tire fixed, I knew I’d probably be back in a couple months anyway. I asked several questions and asked about all the options. In the end, I decided to buy four new tires and avoid the time crunch later.

I wasn’t planning this expenditure for July, but value my time and the safety of my family. And, even though it was a good chunk of money, I was grateful Dave had always set aside money for car repairs. So, it was already in the budget!

I discovered Target was only about a block away, so Lydia and I walked there. I needed to buy a small gift for a friend that day. I was glad to take care of that while we waited because it saved me ‘daycare time’ later on.

Then, we walked back to the shop, thankful for the exercise. My car was almost done. It was getting an alignment, which I learned was very needed. Two tires were pulling off-kilter, but I had grown used to it. I didn’t realize how far off it had been!

After the technician explained to me all they had done, I was grateful to get it fixed! As I drove off, I felt like I had a new car. It drove so smoothly and quietly!

wheel on car

You likely have had different challenges lately! But we can all appreciate God’s protection and wisdom to make good decisions. We can have peace when making decisions knowing He covers us with His grace.

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Heavenly Father, thanks for taking such good care of me! Thanks for showing me the right path to take. Give me wisdom for life’s decisions. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Question: Have you had an unexpected expense that turned out to be a blessing?

Posted on in Miscellaneous, Wisdom

Growing Strong Roots

Over the last two weeks, I have been diligently watering my three new maple trees! They are beautiful and I want to give them a good start on building a solid root system.

new maple

While the trees should grow tall and straight long-term, right now they look a little off-kilter. It has been fairly windy and lately, they are getting blown in every direction! Each tree has lost small areas of branches and leaves, due to the wind breaking them.

Over time, the weathering process will make them resilient. Though, it’s been a harsh recovery process after being transplanted! Every day, as I faithfully water and monitor them, I pray that God will protect the trees and make them strong.

From time to time, we can all feel wind-blown by life circumstances. Maybe it’s been it is a stressful week, month, or year. Maybe the current political drama or latest tragedy in the news has you worried or frightened. Maybe a storm is coming that is out of your control.

maple tree 2

Distress. Discouragement. Discontent.

It can be tempting to give up hope when these trials come. “This isn’t fair. This isn’t what I expected!” Challenges are inevitable. Life isn’t always easy or comfortable. While we cannot control the wind (or outside circumstances), we are not left helpless!

Usually, what we see above ground does not provide a complete picture. Often, we don’t know how well we are growing until gale-force winds come. Then, we find out how strong our roots really are!

Jeremiah 17_7-8

So how do we respond when fierce winds blow?

At times, I can focus on the wind (circumstances) or my own reaction (tossing to and fro). But complaining does no good. When I notice my insecurity rising, I take it as a reminder to quickly switch my attention off my problems and back to the Lord.

Jesus is well-versed in calming the wind! Peace! Be still!

Or, maybe you feel abandoned or neglected, never having solid roots to begin with. Well, Jesus is referred to as the Root of Jesse (Isaiah 11:10). He knows how to grow strong roots!

tree drawing

Whatever we are struggling with, we cannot defeat it on our own. But we can rest with confidence in the Lord’s ability to provide exactly what we need in His timing. He is trustworthy and makes us secure.

When the wind starts to howl, stand firm. If God is for us, who can be against us?

We can thrive even in tumultuous moments. Go deep with God. Seek Him. Learn from His word, the Bible. Ask Him to show you what to do. He’ll help you develop those roots!

big tree roots

“So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness” (Colossians 2:6-7).

Rooted. Built up. Strengthened. Overflowing with thankfulness.

Winds will change and bring new trials. New seasons also bring new opportunities. But God remains the same. Stay close to Him and He will see you through with grace!

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God, thank You for the hope and peace we have in You. Help us draw near to You in the midst of uncertainty. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What do you do when the winds of change pick up? Do you have a strong support system? (God, friends, family, etc.?)

Posted on in Books and Movies I Like, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Personality, Wisdom

Tater Tots and Training Wheels

Lately, Lydia has been taking beginner swimming lessons. She already feels over-confident, yet doesn’t realize the safety belt keeps her afloat! “See, I know how to swim!” Her sense of independence has carried over to other areas, too.

Perhaps it’s part of growing up…but the last few weeks have been tough on me as a parent! On several occasions, I’ve needed an extra-large dose of God’s grace to stand firm with discipline. More than once, I’ve lost my patience and needed a parenting pep-talk!

1 Corinthians 15_58

There have been genuine—but mislead—moments of helping me with household tasks. Lydia was proud of herself but spilled water everywhere. I’m glad she’s learning…but each time she ‘helps,’ it requires a time-consuming clean-up!

There have been full-blown meltdowns too. We’ve had personality ‘power plays’ and other issues. However normal, I could do without the whining and tears!

So, I have reinforced the importance of listening and first-time obedience. We’ve talked about boundaries and respect, forgiveness and grace. It’s an hourly process at times.

I know ALL parents go through these challenges. Most kids do similar things…indeed it’s a little funny, hearing my mom’s familiar voice coming out of my own mouth:

“I love you too much to let you act that way!”

Still, we’ve had some really good moments too. I’ve given and received extra attention, hugs, and “I love you’s.” When I point out what is going well, Lydia beams.

Yes, I am thankful for my smart, healthy, spunky, and beautiful girl. I’m keenly aware some people would give anything to have children…but for some reason cannot.

Let me not take this child or this season for granted.

Old Droid X2 Phone (end Feb 2014) 631

Father’s Day is coming up. In the past, I’ve had Lydia send notes or pictures to her grandpas and uncles. Now she’s old enough to realize that her Daddy is not here to celebrate. But, we are not alone. We have a great support system, near and far.

Also, God has been with us the entire time. He loves Lydia even more than I do. What’s more, He promises to be a father to Lydia (Psalm 68:5). True to His Word, He’s graciously placed many wonderful men in our lives. Besides grandpas and uncles, we also have great friends and neighbors who influence Lydia for good.

I appreciate the men who have stomped in mud puddles, played ball, and taught Lydia new things. A few brave guys have let her paint their nails! They have read to Lydia, given her piggy back rides, and made pictures with sidewalk chalk.

I’m amused at the difference between how men and women handle kids. My “mom-friends” are amazing, but surely, I can learn a few tricks from the men!

painting toenails

Last weekend, I tried to feed Lydia dinner before going outside. She, however, was eager to play with one of the neighbor girls… “I’m not hungry, Mom.” Soon, I got a text from the little girl’s dad: “Can Lydia have some deer sausage?” He was grilling out for his family that evening. In addition to two helpings of sausage, Lydia enjoyed tater tots and a popsicle! 😀

A few days before, we visited other friends, who live across the street. Their little boy was learning to ride his bike without training wheels. He did really well, with some coaching from his dad! I have no idea how I am going to teach Lydia to do this… But after talking with my neighbors, I’m sure this dad would gladly help Lydia learn how to ride her bike too.

Tater tots and training wheels? Yes, please!

bike with training wheels

Clearly, I’m not an expert on parenting. 🙂 Thus, I need the help of those around me and the insight of those ahead of me. There is no such thing as a perfect parent. But I can be present, persistent, and praying for wisdom.

I’m always looking for good resources. Recently, I’ve been using, Praying the Scriptures for Your Children, by Jodie Berndt and Personality Plus for Parents, by Florence Littauer. Great books! Also, I found this podcast helpful!

Parenting is certainly a challenging job, but God will help us accomplish it. When difficulties come, let’s stand firm and work enthusiastically, knowing that nothing we do for the Lord is useless (1 Corinthians 15:58)!

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Heavenly Father, thank You for this precious child You’ve given me. Thanks for providing encouragement and reinforcements on this parenting journey. Please give me Your wisdom and grace every day. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: What are your favorite parenting resources? For those of you with older/grown kids…Do you have any nuggets of wisdom or funny stories to share?!

Posted on in Food and Nutrition, Fruit, Miscellaneous, Wisdom, Words

Gardens: Growing in Grace

Do you have a garden? I was considering the pros and cons of a garden this year. Though, after buying trees last week, routine car maintenance, and a few other expenses coming up, I decided to re-evaluate next spring. I could probably still do a small container garden, but the planting season is nearly over now.

But if I had a garden, I would plant leafy greens (such as kale, spinach, or lettuce), peppers, onions, and green beans, for sure! I could also grow zucchini and use it in my spiralizer. I love fresh garden tomatoes, but I haven’t had the best of luck in recent years!

tomatoes

There are many different kinds of gardens (vegetables, fruits, herbs, flowers). Besides several flower gardens, my parents re-purposed some old tractor tires to make a raised garden for tomatoes. They also have large pots of basil, rosemary, and oregano. Like a colorful oasis, it always feels like a retreat to go back and visit!

Perhaps it’s good for me to wait a year and see what size garden is practical to maintain! In the past, I had a CSA membership… and I always enjoy visiting our local farmers’ markets. Last year, the grass in my yard needed help. This year, I’ll focus on my new trees. Maybe I just enjoy playing in the dirt, but I love how gardening connects us back to the earth!

grapes

From Eden to Gethsemane, it seems God has a special way with gardens.

He plants us in just the right “soil” environment so that we can grow. For each of us, those circumstances are different. You may be going through an exciting time of growth, or a personal trial to refine you. Whether in a lush garden or a desolate desert, stay rooted in the Lord. Don’t give up hope! Drink in the water of His Word. He is faithful.

Jesus promises if we abide in Him, we will bear much fruit. Having fruitful lives is inevitable—if we remain close to Jesus (see John 15:1-17). We cannot bear fruit on our own.

Pruning isn’t fun, but take heart. It’s a good indicator that God is indeed working! In the process, the dead is removed and new life begins. Let Him do the work He needs to do in your life. He is the Master Gardener.

Galatians 5_22-23 with peaches

As evident in the verses above, the Holy Spirit plants seeds in our lives. Though if you look again, GRACE is not listed as a fruit of the Holy Spirit. Why is that?

Could it be grace is like His warm sunshine? Like sunshine, His grace is always present. Even when we cannot see it or understand it. Spiritual fruit grows in the midst of God’s grace. Growth is not easy, but is always for our good. So, rest in Him with quiet trust.

By yielding to the Holy Spirit’s process and receiving God’s grace, we are changed from the inside out!

vegetables

If you think about it, we also plant seeds in the lives of those around us. As we work together, we help each other grow and cultivate good fruit. What a blessing!

 If we are growing in grace, people around us should notice. “I can see the joy on your face!” or “I appreciated your patience with me.” or “That was so kind of you to help me.”

Life is difficult at times—but God’s grace empowers us to live victoriously. Let’s offer His support to one another. And, hold on tight for some “miracle growth!”

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Father God, thanks for Your grace that brings growth in our lives. Holy Spirit, work in us with Your power that we may bear fruit. Help us when the growth process is challenging. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: What are your favorite items to plant? Do you see increasing amounts of spiritual fruit in your life (Galatians 5:22-23)?

Let me know in the comments below!

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Wisdom

Before and After

According to Donald Miller, every great story has at least six to eight “story turns” or “life turns.” Generally, the plot is built around story turns. These are pivotal moments in the story because once a character goes through that ‘door,’ they can never turn back. These moments change the character and life will never be the same again.

Story turns can be good, like getting married, having a baby, or landing a dream job. (The positive stress that comes with those is called eustress.) Somehow though, moments of distress seem to be the most memorable. Is that because we tend to focus on the negativity, or because they actually have the most potential to bring change?

time for change

I don’t always appreciate change. I like my comfort zone! Often, change isn’t comfortable, but it is good and necessary long-term. Change makes life interesting!

Two of my biggest story turns felt like a one-two punch: Dave’s cancer diagnosis followed by his death 364 days later. I had to learn to walk a new path. Things feel better (most days), but that’s largely because God has carried us as we have adjusted to our new normal. It still feels crazy sometimes, but God keeps reminding me to rest.

Dave and I learned so much when he was sick. But after Dave died, God brought me to a whole new level of grace. Grace for myself. I simply could not keep up with everything on my should-do list. So, I had to relax my standards…and then relax them again.

I knew if I was going to get through the grief process, I was going to need God’s help. Grief is a process. Change is a process. It hasn’t been easy, but in His strength, I’ve been able to accomplish what He has for me to do (Philippians 4:13). Jesus said He would never leave me, and I have chosen to trust Him to show me the way. I’ve relied on His power, and He has given me His peace (John 14:27).

Colossians 3_15

As a Registered Dietitian and Nutritionist, I often see “before and after” client photos or food journals. It is gratifying to see the differences after even a few changes are made. Many of them are difficult to implement, but carry life-changing potential.

So, here are some of my “before and after” snapshots (figuratively speaking):

Before, I tried to plan my way to a perfect outcome (or life). Now, I keep planning in perspective. My new motto in many areas is, “Close enough is good enough.” (It doesn’t apply to everything, but it’s a really good ‘get out of jail free’ card most days!)

Before, fear was closely linked to my perfectionist tendency to plan for all contingencies. I often had a nagging feeling that something could go wrong. Now, I praise God fear is no longer a stronghold in my life. I have learned to let things go… In fact, I rarely have any fear at all. And when I do, I catch it right away and deal with it.

Before, I worried about decisions, trying to figure out all the details in advance. I still believe planning is wise, but I don’t over-plan due to fear and worry. Now, I wait to make a decision until I have peace about it. Of course, that doesn’t mean I know all the information beforehand. But, I’m okay with that now. I don’t have to have ALL the answers to walk by FAITH. I know God will come through for me, so I wait for His peace.

May 15th 2016_Three years

Before, I would do everything I could to avoid confrontation. (I was also more of a people-pleaser!) I respectfully address and resolve conflict much quicker now, not letting simple issues drag on. Perhaps I have a shorter fuse now. One thing I do know is that Life is too short to get worked up about petty issues!

Before, I was always busy but didn’t feel like I made much progress in any area. After Dave died, God streamlined my focus. So now, I am doing less random activity, but having much more impact in areas that are important to me. I have felt much more fruitful and productive these last few years.

How about you? What are your biggest “before and after” moments?

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God, You are good! Thank You for writing our stories with Your love and grace. Thanks for being with us on the journey. Draw us near to You, in Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: As you look back on significant “life turns,” can you see how God shown His faithfulness to you? How has your life been changed as a result?