Category: Perseverance

Posted on in Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Worship

You Are Not Alone

This morning, it looks like a winter wonderland in North Dakota! It is quite pretty and peaceful. The wind has not picked up yet, so it looks like we are in a snow globe. A truly glorious gift!

I wonder just how much snow will accumulate, though it appears several inches have already fallen. Schools are closed, but there is online/virtual school. Many parents will be navigating that with their work schedules. I am grateful for an understanding boss!

I will clear some of my snow, but my snow service is doing the bulk of it!

Yesterday morning, I was on my way to work, and it had already started to snow. The roads were already a little slick, but I was thankful it wasn’t worse.

I am a good driver but don’t always like driving in the snow. Nonetheless, I know God has me covered with his grace. As soon as I got in the car, I heard the song “I Am Not Alone” by Kari Jobe. It is a beautiful song and just what I needed.

The song also reminded me of all God has done for me and eased my anxiety in the moment. He has done such an excellent job of taking care of us, especially in the years I have been a widow and single mom. Thank You, Lord.

God reminded me that He was with me on my morning commute, and I remembered He was with me on the evening drive home (by that time, the roads were worse). I took it slow and focused on the roads and God’s presence. Praise God, Jesus is our Emmanuel.

Free illustrations of Snow globe

Last night, I noticed some kids were playing in the snow and building the biggest snowman I have ever seen! So fun! The snow was perfectly wet for packing together. Maybe Lydia and I can make our own snowman today!

You know, we don’t have to fabricate or conjure up a savior, and we don’t have to solve our problems on our own. We are not alone because Jesus is our Emmanuel…He’s no snowflake! He didn’t just float to Earth and look pretty; He dared to be born in a filthy stable and then die on our behalf.

Whatever problems you are facing today, remember: YOU ARE NOT ALONE. God is right there with you, so don’t isolate yourself. Acknowledge His presence and accept His help! Be open-minded so you don’t miss what God is doing. Sometimes that looks like Christmas cookies and a smile, but at other times, it looks like a stranger’s snow shovel!

Snow or not, I hope you stay warm and safe today. Maybe drink some hot cocoa!

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God, thanks for Jesus, our Emmanuel! Thanks for being everything we need and reminding us of Your love and grace. Help us make wise decisions as we rely on You. Help us look out for others. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: When was the last time you built a snowman… or sand castle, for those of you down South? What is your favorite winter activity?

Tasks: Listen to this song and accept all the peace, joy, comfort, and help coming your way!

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Prayer, Wisdom, Worship

Empty and Filled

This life is full of contradictions and competing scenarios. We don’t think about them all too often, but lately, I have noticed more of them.

Here are a few to get us started: You can be invited somewhere yet feel both excited and nervous to go. It’s okay if you want to attend and stay home simultaneously. You can have low energy and feel wiped out due to a big event, yet feel fulfilled. We may feel one way when we are rested and another when we need to rest!

In the Bible, the Beatitudes also show some contradictions. Jesus turned things upside down! And, as Paul wrote in Philippians 1:21, “To live is Christ, to die is gain.” A win-win!

Sometimes, contradictions are a matter of perspective. What causes one person to feel “empty” may cause another to feel “full” and vice versa. We can be empty or full or anywhere in between.

Free photos of Cup

On Sunday night, Lydia told me she was “dreading” going to school. That was a strong statement, so I asked why and she said, “Because tomorrow is Monday.” After a little more digging, she was actually looking forward to seeing her friends. Whew!

A lot of it was just Lydia’s attitude, and she was sleepy… which tends to morph into other emotions. Before it went too far, I used it as a learning opportunity! I reminded her that there are about fifty-two Mondays in a year, so if she doesn’t get ahold of herself, she could face the same dilemma every week. And weeks become months, which become years.

I shared with her some ‘opposites’ I have been pondering lately about feeling empty or full. Some examples could include feeling hungry or satisfied; yearning for something or finally getting it; feeling tired or well-rested; disliking the weather, or being content with it. In each case, the point is that we can be grateful and invite Jesus to fill us and sustain us!

Lydia quickly understood what I meant and started to apply it. Her attitude improved almost immediately, and she soon drifted off to sleep. The next morning, she came into the bathroom to brush her teeth. “Mom, I woke up feeling a little empty, you know?”

I nodded and asked if Lydia was feeling better after eating breakfast. She agreed and said she had asked God to help her. I was so proud of her! She ended up having a good Monday after all, though I am sure we will continue to refine this point!

In this Advent season, I, too, have been feeling a little empty at times. I may be a little sad and missing Dave, but I am also thinking of friends who are suffering or missing loved ones. I am so grateful for the full hope we have in Jesus!

We need to be careful not to fill the void with anything else but Jesus. Though it is quite easy to… eat, watch a show, play on your phone, call a friend, etc. Only Jesus will do.

When I feel empty, I can ask Jesus to fill me. When I am full, I can praise God for His blessing. When I want or need something, I can ask the Lord to help; when I have no lack, I can praise Him for his provision.

When I am sick or in pain, He is my healer. When I am well, I can praise Him for making me whole. When I am weak, then I am strong. Jesus is my all in all.

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God, thanks for Your love, grace, and provision! Thanks for filling me when I am empty and letting me perceive Your grace when I am full. Keep reminding me You are near. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you ever noticed feeling empty or full? In those cases, what is your go-to response? Do you try to fill the space yourself, or do you turn to Jesus?

Tasks: Regardless of your circumstances or feelings, invite Jesus in. He is our hope and healer, so watch Him move on your behalf. Also, read Ephesians 1, and notice the very last line!

Posted on in Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Personality, Wisdom, Worship

Glitchy

I hope you are having a great week! My week is going well so far, though not quite how I expected. Let’s say it’s been a little glitchy!

Last night, someone came to work on my internet while I was trying to write this post. I intentionally kept it short so all my effort didn’t get wiped out!

If you recall, my internet needed work earlier this year, yet there was one part that couldn’t be fixed. The outside line couldn’t be accessed due to snow. I had forgotten about it for the most part, but I recently noticed it was glitchy while on Zoom or streaming movies. The internet was out for several minutes last weekend, so I called and booked the appointment for Tuesday night.

They worked on the glitches and gave me a few tips to improve it! I might need to buy a wifi extender, but I will have to figure out what I need first. It’s always fun to learn!

Free photos of Laptop

Another thing that hasn’t been working well is… my gut! Without oversharing, I will leave it at this: I decided to go to work about an hour late on Tuesday and also ended up leaving about an hour early due to discomfort (and also a non-COVID scratchy throat and cough). I am grateful for an understanding, boss!

It surprised me because last weekend, I felt terrific gut-wise. Low stress, good food, plenty of sleep, and exercise…. really the best conditions possible for gut health! But, Sunday night and Monday night, I didn’t sleep well, primarily due to my throat and gut. No big deal, in the long run, just a little glitch.

Even when I don’t feel good, I usually push myself to work anyway. So, this week, I am proud of prioritizing my health (coming in late and leaving early). Perhaps it was easier since my patient load wasn’t as busy, and nothing needed to be rearranged!

With gentle movement, medication, and time, I think I am on the mend now.

Free illustrations of Network

As I left work early yesterday, I heard a song by the band, We the Kingdom, called “Miracle Power.” It’s remarkable on its own, but the part that always gets me is this:

“I may not know what a day may bring, but I know who brings the day.”

Isn’t that on point?!

Whatever glitches your day or week holds, God has you covered. You can rest in His grace and sleep well, knowing He will carry the burdens for you. You don’t need to worry.

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God, thanks for working through all our ups and downs… turning them all around for Your glory and our good. Thanks for being with us all the way. Help us rest in Your grace and praise You through all our glitches. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you had any glitches in your week? How is God working through them?

Task: Listen to this song and praise God through your glitches today!

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Personality, Pivot, Prayer, Wisdom

Cozy and Thankful

Here in the Great North, wintry weather has come! It makes me just want to stay home and watch movies while drinking something warm. 🙂 Cozy!

Actually, this is the best winter weather in that we haven’t had much blowing or accumulation yet. We can still see around the street corners, and it’s all really beautiful!

Since I fell on the ice at home over the weekend, I called my chiropractor on Monday to see if I could get in for an adjustment. Her husband, also a chiropractor, answered the phone and explained she also fell and hurt herself even worse. I hit my head and elbow, but it seems she broke her elbow in two places! I decided could just wait until later in December to see if she is starting to see patients again. If you think of her, pray for Dr. Jenny.

Interestingly, one of my coworkers and a few of my patients also have fallen on the ice, too. We’ve all had similar ‘war wounds.’ Altogether, this has made me feel even more careful than usual… I’m ‘walking like a penguin’ just in case.

Free photos of Mirror

The evening drive after work has also been a little nerve-wracking. I am a good driver, but don’t necessarily enjoy driving… and I was feeling a little time-crunched at work. Yesterday, I started off slow, and it took about eleven extra minutes to get across town since a lot of other drivers were also being cautious. Probably wise!

I was praying and turned off the radio so I could focus. Then, I just started thanking God for keeping me safe and for helping us all to drive well. I also told Him how pretty the snow was and how I was thankful there was no wind. I was very grateful for my reliable Subaru with all-wheel-drive. While I missed seeing the sun, I was glad it wasn’t ‘blinding’ me while driving. There’s always something to be thankful for!

Talking with God calmed me down! Now sometimes, I do complain, but yesterday, I was getting rid of other distractions in order to pay attention. It made a huge difference in my attitude and my driving!

Instead of being stressed when I picked up Lydia, I was calm. I’m sure she appreciated that too! I stopped to get some gas, and then we were home-free. Thanks, Lord!

With a new perspective, I was able to enjoy dinner with Lydia, write my blog post, exercise, and catch up on Season 2 of The Chosen before watching the first two episodes of Season 3 this coming weekend in the theater! It’s good to be cozy and thankful! 😉

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God, thanks for your grace and protection. Help me be wise and listen; help me know when to be bold and when to be cautious. My confidence is in You alone. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What is your favorite part about winter weather? What are you thankful for?

Task: Please pray for my chiropractor, and also tell God what you are thankful for!

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance

Finding Grace #347

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Free photos of Deer

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This week was low-key at first but then picked up at the end.

Lydia was still sick on Sunday and stayed home on Monday. We used the day to rest, and I made sure she ate. Thankfully, she felt better (enough) Tuesday, and we went back to work and school! I am grateful for some awesome coworkers who could cover all my duties!

Work was busy as usual, but I did my best as usual. I had some fun patients and some good conversations with professionals in other fields. My dietitian coworkers and I had fun dressing up for an early Halloween party on Friday. We did a group costume where one person made a pool table costume to wear, and almost everyone else was the colored balls! I happened to be the cue stick. We all had a good laugh! 

My friend with the new baby came over for Chinese food and a movie. It is so fun to see how much the baby has grown over the last eight weeks. It reminds me of how Lydia was once so little… she really enjoys holding the baby, too. 

Today, Lydia had a playdate with a friend. They went to a dance class and had fun! I cleaned the bathtub and paid some bills in peace. 😉 Later, we bought some Halloween candy for trick-or-treat and ran a couple of errands. It was a beautiful day to get outside!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Gratitude, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Worship

Perfectly Loved

Do you have a favorite song right now? Currently, I love “Perfectly Loved“ by Rachael Lampa (featuring TobyMac).

I recognized her name but couldn’t recall where I might have heard of her. After a quick online search, I realized I have her first CD from years ago! This is a new song, however.

The tune hits those emotional notes, and the message is spot-on. Every time I hear it on the radio, it speaks to my heart. Here are some of the song lyrics:

“Ooh, even when you were runnin’
Even when you were hidin’
Never been a moment that you were not perfectly loved
Whеn you barely believеd it
When your eyes couldn’t see it
Every single moment, you’ve always been perfectly loved”

Free photos of Heart

Later, the lyrics mention being “perfectly human, made from the dust” which just makes me so grateful for all that God has done in me and through me.

The song is a good reminder that God knows our flaws, faults, and failings, yet He loves us anyway. God knows our shortcomings and meets us right where we are. He invites us to join Him in His work, but He knows our limitations and covers them with his grace.

God knows our weaknesses, yet He empowers us with His strength. He never gives up on us, even we give up on ourselves. He is always cheering us on!

“God loves us the way we are, but too much to leave us that way.” –Leighton Ford

I don’t know about you, but I find all of this very encouraging. Whatever we are going through, God already knows. He’s right here with us, extending me grace and also mercy when needed. He stretches us and prompts us to grow, but He doesn’t leave all the work up to us. Thank You, Lord!!

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God, thanks for loving us no matter what. Thanks for walking with us and carrying us when needed. Also, thanks for the gift of music; may our lives be a sweet symphony to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What is your favorite song currently on the radio? Do you prefer to sing in the car or in the shower?!

Task: Listen to “Perfectly Loved” and let it marinate in your heart and mind!

Posted on in Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance

A Few Loose Screws

Lately, I have done a lot of hands-on work around the house. I have moved benches and deck furniture, and I put up the Christmas lights as I prepare for winter. I have taken a few trips to the recycling station, too.

In addition, I have taken apart several things to sell. These include a table and four chairs, two ottomans, and a weight bench. I was making room for other priorities. Most of the items were fairly easy, but it was challenging to tear the table apart. It hadn’t been moved in twelve years, so the screws were in tight.

And, I have put together some things, too. These include a dolly and two pieces of exercise equipment (upgrades for my personal gym!). The dolly was actually the toughest thing of all because the metal just would not cooperate and the directions were a little confusing! I did manage to get a couple of bruises, but nothing to worry about.

All in all, I followed all the directions, and thankfully, I haven’t had many parts left over!

Free photos of Stainless steel screw

As I was piecing together one item, the directions mentioned how if certain screws weren’t in just right, it could cause an accident, or even death. They were tiny screws!

I made sure to double-check all the nuts, bolts, and screws. Just to be sure. I wouldn’t want to put my weight on something and have it fall apart.

In fact, I was incredulous that my safety could depend on the smallest component. A few loose screws could be quite a problem!

Then, I got to thinking… God holds all things together through Jesus and the power of His Word; no screws needed! Not just my life or yours, but the entire world. He is more than capable!

Whether it is a lot of steps or just a few, God always knows just what needs to be done. He wrote the directions, or guide, to Life! We can trust Him to hold the full weight of whatever we are going through. He will protect us but also catch us if we happen to fall. He’s got us covered!

Ultimately, God loves us even when we have ‘a few screws loose.’ 😉 We fall short, but He accepts us as we are. He can take all of our mess and make something strong, beautiful, and purposeful!

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God, thanks for covering us with Your wisdom, strength, grace, and love. You never let us down! Help us trust You every step of the way. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Do you enjoy hands-on tasks, like putting together items around the house or refinishing furniture? What are your favorite tools?

Task: Next time you buy something with a lot of pieces to assemble, reflect on how God organizes the pieces of your life, too. You are a perfectly designed masterpiece (Ephesians 2:10)!

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom, Worship

Finding Grace #343

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Free photos of Oak

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?!

This was a really good week! I enjoyed talking with family, including my parents who live in Florida. Hurricane Ian brought wind and rain, but they were protected. The hurricane was not a direct hit for them. There is much to be grateful for, and my prayers are with those who were affected.

All week long, I was behind on charting at work. I tried not to be too stressed, however. Several of my coworkers helped out, as I kept getting patients which took time away from getting caught up. One day, they took four of my easier patients, and then I got three more since I am in the walk-in clinic. It was a little funny, and I am glad to be part of such a great team of ladies!

I happily noticed our new little neighbor girl was wearing Lydia’s old winter coat! The mornings certainly felt chilly in the 50s and 60s, but of course, it will only get colder! I was honored when the mom called me simply to check on me. She hadn’t made it to the bus stop because of the chilly weather, but she wanted to make sure I was doing well and having a good week. That little surprise made my day!

My medical test went well, and I received excellent news that everything is normal. I had a follow-up on Friday, and my provider said I didn’t need to come back! She made a couple of recommendations to ease my gut symptoms, and I will be implementing those. All in all, it is a huge relief knowing that I don’t have to make big changes. Praise God!

This week, I did some hands-on projects. I bought and put together a dolly/cart and used it to move and assemble some gym equipment. I had asked someone for help, but they weren’t available when I was. It will be a couple of weeks until they are free, and I decided not to wait any longer. The equipment was fairly heavy going down the stairs, which ironically made me feel strong and accomplished just moving it! I prayed for God to help me, and He did! I am proud of myself for doing the hard work and getting it done!

As I drove around town this week, I noticed some of the beautiful fall colors starting to pop! It’s such a pretty time of year! I mowed yesterday, but only did the long parts. Some of the grass didn’t really need it! Lydia was also glad she didn’t have to help after all! 😉

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Food and Nutrition, Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom, Worship

Sweet Relief

This week, I had a simple medical test/procedure. It was fairly straightforward and, as such, almost not worth mentioning. But, I wanted to share a little of my experience in case it benefits someone else… 

In short, I have had mild gut issues over many years. I had similar issues as a kid, in college, and before/after Dave died from colon cancer. I don’t know if my symptoms are related to internalizing stress or my Hashimoto’s thyroid disease, an autoimmune disease I have had for twenty-five years.

Indeed, I mentioned my concerns to my doctor after Dave’s funeral, but then talked myself out of further testing when she offered it. I was really emotional at the time and didn’t want deal with it. I don’t recommend that avoidant approach, however!

Earlier this year, I got my back in better shape and realized my gut could also use some help. I had gotten so used to the discomfort that I just assumed it was normal.

To clarify, my symptoms are somewhat normal… no overt signs of disease. But, some people are just more sensitive than others, and I tend to have gut discomfort when others don’t (even when we eat the same foods). The gut is known as the ‘second brain,’ so when it is not functioning correctly, it can impact quite a lot of other things!

Free photos of Manzana

Well, this year, I again spoke up at my annual physical in May. This time, I requested a referral to gastroenterology. I appreciated that both of the providers listened to my concerns, though I was still a little nervous.

In June, we decided to do some more testing, which occurred this week. The prep was less than glamorous, but the results were “pretty darn good” to quote the doctor running the test! 🙂

Leading up to the test, I kept my focus on Jesus and took on His peace, which is freely given. He is the Source of my life and strength, so it is always wise to trust Him.

On the day of the test, everyone was extremely friendly and helpful. They were so kind and knowledgeable that it put my mind at ease. I was able to relax and go with the flow. It was a much different feeling than when I waited for Dave’s test results all those years ago.

When the doctor introduced herself, she agreed it was good to get tested since autoimmune diseases can often run together. I briefly mentioned my concerns, especially since Dave had zero symptoms at his colon cancer diagnosis. (Mine was a test to rule out a wide variety of potential illnesses!) She was so compassionate, and I was glad I chose her to do the test!

Free photos of Fruit

I still have those mild symptoms – and a follow-up for potential next steps – but ALL my results came back clear! I don’t have celiac disease, Crohn’s disease, an ulcer, micro-colitis, diverticulosis, H Pylori, cancer, or anything else. Whew, I am so relieved!! It is still possible to get a generic diagnosis (like IBS or a food intolerance), but I can’t self-diagnose those things. Thankfully, we ruled out all the major red flags!

My hunch has been that it just will come down to paying more attention to my food choices and how they affect me. I already do this to some degree; as a Registered Dietitian, it’s right up my alley. Fiber and water are key! But, even though I eat well and enjoy most foods, my gut may think differently.  😉

Other good strategies will include ongoing stress management to lower chronic inflammation; continuing my exercise routine, so my gut runs well; and getting adequate sleep to restore my system each night. This is easier said than done, but I am committed to doing the work it takes to feel good consistently.

Professionally, I always tell my patients: “You are your best advocate, and you know your body best.” Today, I am thankful I was brave, despite my earlier fear. I am glad I advocated for myself, and I am grateful for the good results. We only get one body, and we have the privilege of caring for it, as a Temple.

All in all, I wanted to praise God and to share a little— but not too much– with you about my health journey (a.k.a. my Forty-Year Tune-Up)! Also, I want to give a shout-out to the three women doctors and their staff who have helped me.

Thank you for reading and celebrating with me!

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God, You are so gracious and merciful!! Thanks for protecting me and giving me peace of mind. May I continue to make healthy choices that honor You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What part of this post resonated with you? Do you need to advocate for yourself or someone else?

Tasks: Listen to “The Healing“ by Blanca and Dante Bowe. Sing out your praises to God! He is Jehovah-Rapha, the God Who Heals.

Posted on in Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Pivot, Wisdom

Like A Mother Hen

On our recent Montana trip, we saw a grouse family on our long hike up Sentinel Mountain. These birds, also called partridges, were along the trail and then fanned out when we came along. There were about seven birds, and most of them must’ve been babies.

The mother called them to her as we passed by. It was cool to watch as they flocked back to her. She stood in one place and let them come to her, but I imagine she would’ve gone berserk if we had come closer!

These birds reminded me of the partridges we have at my house. For some reason, lately, they have been all over my yard! It makes me smile and laugh when I see them all waddle across the street into my yard. Occasionally, I have seen them by my free little library… maybe they like to read?!

Anyway, it is fun to watch the birds, even though they all run or fly away when I come around the corner. So funny! Soon the weather will change, and I wonder where they will end up.

Now, I could make this post about mothers or mothering… such as how ‘mothers know best’ or ‘mom is always there for you.’ But, for today, I want to keep the focus on Jesus.

In Luke 13:34, NLT, Jesus said, “Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing.”

Jesus was filled with sorrow because His people would rather kill Him instead of turn to Him. He knew the disaster that was coming their way years later when the temple and much of the city were destroyed. He wanted to protect them, and He was saddened at their resistance.

Jesus said all that about Jerusalem and the Jewish people, but His words are a good reminder for us, too. When chaos comes, who do we run to? What is our gut reaction?

 It’s easy to turn to friends or turn on the television, but only Jesus saves.

We can find temporary comfort in the things of this world, but only Jesus brings peace that lasts. When you don’t know what to do, ask Jesus.

Better yet, seek Him first! Find where He is and join Him. Then, you for sure will be on the right path! His grace covers you, and He will make a way for you.

God sees you and knows you…even better than your mother. 😉 He understands exactly what you need even before you figure it out! 

Run to Him. Lean on Him. Let Him protect you and lead you. He is faithful.

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God, thanks for drawing us near and holding us close. May we not turn away from you, but run to You instead. May all we do glorify You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Do you like to birdwatch? Do you have a favorite bird? Do you find yourself running to God in hard times, or do you try to solve your own problems?

Tasks: Grab a bird identification book and put a pair of binoculars in your car, so you are ready when you see some cool birds! Remember, draw near to God and He will draw near to you!