Category: Life is Short

Posted on in Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Procrastination

Because He Is Faithful

The last few weeks have been quite full around here … I’m sure you can relate!

I’ve had some awe-inspiring “I-can’t-believe-I-get-do-this” moments and some “not-so-fast-try-again” moments. I’ve had some late nights and a couple early ‘zombie’ mornings, as well. You too?!

These days, I am trying to focus on sleeping more each night and resting more often. But at times, I can still feel overwhelmed! In those moments, it can be difficult to figure out which task needs to be done first. They ALL seem urgent and important!

post-its-all-over

My to-do list often grows faster than I can check tasks off! “To-do or not to-do” quickly becomes the question. I’m sure you’ve been there too!

However, recently, God reminded me He knows the limitations of my day and time. He knows I can’t possibly finish everything at once. He is not the one pressuring me to complete each task…therefore, maybe I am creating my own stress!

As a result, I’ve started to look at things differently…like maybe each task on my should-do list is simply a heavenly heads-up. God already knows I can’t do it all—a lesson I am continually relearning—but He wants me to be in the loop about what is coming.

He is an awesome planner after all!  I keep focusing on working with Jesus, rather than having to accomplish everything on my own. What grace!

So I will continue to pray and prepare wisely throughout the week, but will not worry when things don’t get done. I will work hard, yet stop to take breaks and enjoy life.

I feel better already!

hebrews-10_23

Of course, none of us know what each day will hold—no matter how much we try to schedule it. But I am glad to leave it all in the hands of Jesus.

Because He is faithful, I don’t have to depend on my own understanding. I know He will show me the right path to follow (Proverbs 3:5-6).

Because He is a faithful Provider, I don’t have to worry about making ends meet. I can go to bed at night and rest well, knowing He is watching over me and working on all that concerns me (Psalm 127:2).

When I feel weak, wanting to give up or give in, He gives me the strength to persevere. And because He is faithful, I can do all things He has called me to do, though not necessarily everything I think I should do (Philippians 4:13)!

path-in-the-woods

Yes, because He is faithful, I can be content despite my circumstances (Philippians 4:11). In the midst of trials, I know He will come through for me.

When I don’t measure up, even then, He won’t let me down. When I stumble, I know He is faithful to forgive. His mercies are new every morning and His grace is sufficient (2 Corinthians 12:9)!

Because He is faithful, I know Jesus will keep His promises (Psalm 145:13). Life is tough, but He will not leave me to fend for myself. So I will let Him lead me and sustain me. He knows exactly what I need!

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Jesus, thanks for the daily reminders of Your love and grace. I put my hope and trust in You, for You are faithful. Lord, help me keep the right perspective that I get to do life with You, and don’t have to do it alone. In Your Name, Amen.

Questions: Is there anything you are trying to handle on your own? Can you take it to Jesus and leave it with Him?

Task: Write down a list of all the ways God has been faithful to you.

 

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Worship

A Note to My 29 Year-Old Self

This week I am celebrating! Not only is it my birthday week, it’s also the one year mark of making my blog public. Can you believe it?! I feel it is still a work in progress, but I am so grateful for you all. Thanks for sticking with me! 🙂

birthday candles

Dave often celebrated my birthday week. That’s because one year, he forgot the exact date and decided to give me gifts every day! He was pretty smooth like that.

These days, celebrating my birthday, like many other things, is different without him.

Typically, I’ll eat lunch with a friend, talk with lots of friends and family, and get a massage. This year, I am also taking Lydia to a local (minor league) baseball game. She’s been asking to go all summer, and the fireworks at the end might be a special perk!

Around my birthday, I like to look back on the last year and set some goals for the next. For whatever reason, this week I also considered all that has happened since moving to Fargo six years ago this month. It’s bittersweet.

Grace mug_Eph 2-8

I have noticed many major life events have occurred since my 29th birthday. In short:

I was twenty-nine when Lydia was born. While Dave and I were thrilled to be parents, the sleeplessness threw us for a loop! Five months later, we were just starting to sleep well when Dave was diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer. After 364 days of fighting cancer with Dave, I became a widow and single mom at the age of thirty.

Hence, the last few years have been a continual adjustment (and readjustment). So much has changed. But far be it from me to complain!

chocolate cupcake

Have you ever wished you could tell your former self how something works out? Hindsight brings clarity! I can’t explain it all in a simple blog post, but God has been so good to us.

Someday I’ll have all the words… but not today. So for now, with much gratitude, here’s a note I wrote to my 29 year-old self!

Hello, dear Self,

I know you cannot comprehend all that the next few years entail. You can’t possibly fathom the pain and struggles that lie ahead. But God does—and He’s got this.

You don’t realize this now, but fear has been a constant presence lurking in the back of your mind. It limits your decisions at times.

Yet God knows this—and He’s going to free you from all your fears. What’s more, as He destroys old mindsets, you will learn to walk in Victory. The whole process will certainly be scary, but He will lead you through. Trust Him!

Sometimes, this journey will make you question everything you believe about God. But He is big enough to handle your doubts and fears, your anger and resentment.

He’s got this.

There will be moments you can barely breathe. You won’t know how you’re going to make it. When you think you cannot take anymore, you’re right. But take it to Jesus. He is your hope and firm anchor. Let Him carry the burden for you. He cares for you deeply and knows exactly what you need.

When you feel like giving up or running away, stand firm. The battle belongs to the Lord. He is your shield, your protector, and your defense. He’s got you covered!

When everything falls apart, you will see God holding together what remains. He is your rock and your salvation! Everything that really matters is secure in Him.

Yes, dear Self, life gets rough up ahead. It can feel quite heavy at times. But don’t worry. God’s got this! In fact, there is much good along the way.

New goals and dreams, new purposes and plans. Long-awaited answers to prayer.

God will use these experiences to show you just how much He loves you. He will prove His love and power are stronger than any difficult thing you will (ever) face.

 And yes, He’s absolutely got this!

It won’t be easy, but in time, you will see the pattern of grace. From this side of it all, it actually IS amazing. When the dust settles, you will be grateful. And despite all odds, you will still wake up with wonder at this life you get to live. What a gift!

What felt like defeat, was really training grounds for a new path. Where there was doubt, trust will deepen. In place of despair, hope will rise. In the midst of pain, you will find peace and beauty. You will flourish!

Praise God—He’s got this!

So do not be afraid, dear Self. You are always loved, never alone. God will not falter. His mercies are new every morning, and His grace is more than enough.

Keep your head held high, because the best is yet to come. God is working all this for good, even when you don’t see how. It will be beyond your wildest imagination!

Seek God’s grace and goodness each day. Rejoice in the Lord’s unfailing love and faithfulness! Most of all, hold on tight to Jesus.

Cling to Him for He is your strength and your life.

And you know what? He’s got this!!

XOXO,

Your 30-something Self

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Gracious God, thank You for bringing me through with Victory. I celebrate your loving kindness—You are so good to me! Bless this next year and help me live for you! In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you ever written yourself a note like this? What words of wisdom would you write?

Posted on in Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Procrastination, Travel

5 Benefits of Taking a Break

I don’t know about you, but I cannot believe how fast the summer is going! It’s probably been the best summer yet, since Dave went to heaven three years ago. Lydia and I are doing well, praise God!

sunflower

With August just around the corner, our month is already filling up. Lydia has a little camp to attend with a friend; we have a visitor coming for a few days; and we have a host of other fun activities.

However, I’ve been somewhat relaxed most of July, having spent 2+ weeks traveling. So, I purposely postponed a few tasks and projects in favor of keeping things simple. I’m not really procrastinating, just focusing on different things for a change. It feels good!

Clearly, God has done a good work in me! In years past, I would have stressed about it. Now, instead of worrying, I’ve just decided to go with it! That’s grace! (And a lot more fun!)

I’ll get back to my normal routine in the coming days.

Meanwhile, here are five benefits of taking a break (or road trip, whatever). 😉

Psalm 29_11

More Rest: This may seem obvious, but we all need rest physically. On my last trip, I slept for 8 hours five days in a row. That’s the longest 8-hour streak I have had in…years! Also, my exercise routine is usually different when I travel. But even if I stay home on a rest day, my activity patterns are still laid-back.

More Relaxation: For me, this is mental. My best thinking and problem-solving comes when I am relaxed. Enjoying a different mental pace frees me up to think about other important things. My body may be hiking, canoeing or swimming, but my mind is on its own adventure! I love when my imagination kicks in and I can explore creative solutions. In fact, it’s a necessity to have a little time (traveling or not) each week to just chill and think clearly.

Less Stress: Cue the release of emotional burdens! We don’t need to carry the weight of our emotional stress. Yet, sometimes we fail to recognize the load on our shoulders. By taking time away, we can leave behind overwhelm, fear, worry, anger, etc. Sometimes, a little distance is all we need to realize we need to make different choices or move on. Stepping away for a little break may bring temporary relief or permanent changes.

Clear Perspective: When we take a break, we can also gain spiritual clarity. We can see the bigger picture, instead of focusing on our present circumstances. During a vacation from our problems, we can see what is really important. Perhaps God wants to provide direction or show us something new. He longs to answer our prayers, but we risk missing Him altogether when we don’t take time to listen. When we slow down, we can hear His Voice in the peace and quiet.

Increased Growth: In addition to new ideas and perspectives, taking time to explore can lead to growth in skills, knowledge, and even relationships. Find what inspires you to live a full life. Make memories with those you love, and meet new friends. Seek new challenges and put away your should-do list.

fishing and rest

I made a confession last week. Here’s another: Often, I don’t realize how much I need a break until I am actually taking one! It is becoming clear to me that I cannot afford to neglect breaks. When I regularly schedule rest, my overall outlook improves.

Psalm 23:2 says, “He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters, He refreshes my soul.” Yes, it may be challenging to take time away. But it is so important! Life is short…let God have your worries and take a break! 

Or, as I wrote earlier this year, take the trip you have been putting off.

If you are feeling tired and worn out…relax! Consider options for a daily break, a weekly escape, a monthly getaway, and/or a yearly retreat. Even if you stay home, explore your local surroundings. Try new foods, new parks, new entertainment. Be creative!

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Father God, thank You for blessing us with rest. Thank You for restoring us in the peace and quiet. Help us seek Your grace and Your pace each day. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: Have you taken any trips lately? How can you build more rest and relaxation into your life?

Posted on in Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Travel

A Road Trip to Lake Superior

Over 4th of July weekend, Lydia and I went on another road trip! We drove through several small Minnesota towns along Highway 210. We went through Duluth and on to Bayfield, Wisconsin, via Route 13.

Bayfield was once a booming town on a prominent shipping route. Today, it’s a small town along the Lake Superior South Shore, gateway to the Apostle Islands National Lakeshore.

Lake Superior

We drove the six or seven hours from Fargo to meet my parents and two other couples from their sailing club (in Illinois). The eight of us had a fun adventure together!

I was looking forward to seeing my parents and crossing some items off my “travel bucket list.” I have wanted to see the Minnesota countryside, including some of the “10,000 lakes” and Duluth. I have also wanted to explore Lake Superior for quite some time.

But guess what? We almost didn’t go!  It was a lot of work to prepare for the trip. I had to pack for two, reschedule a commitment, plan for our return, etc. I have a couple other big plans (and projects) for the summer, so I wondered if taking time away was a good idea. Still, I was excited for the opportunity, and I am so glad we went!

Lake Superior at night

Lydia is an awesome little traveler, and we had a special time away with my mom and dad. Usually when we travel to Illinois, there are other people or plans vying for our attention. We stayed together in a cute bed-and-breakfast and had perfect weather for the entire trip.

What a blessing!

Our new friends were very eager to show us around. Excellent hosts, they generously took us all on their sailboat, speed boat, and dinghy to explore several of the Apostle Islands.

The first night (Friday) we went out to see the stars. We used the ‘Sky View’ app to learn about the constellations! Lydia loved going fast on the boat ride!

Devil's IslandCove at Devil's Island

Saturday included a dinghy ride to see an old shipwreck. The water was so clear! We also motored out to Raspberry Island to see a light house. We toured the buildings, and it was compelling to think about the history and importance of lighthouses. Such brave men (and their families) gave up everything to ensure the safety of sailors and other travelers.

Sunday was spent on an all day trip to one of the farthest islands. On Devil’s Island, we saw another lighthouse and natural sandstone caves eroded by years of wind and water. The colors were beautiful and I took pictures of the caves, water, and ships passing by.

On Sunday evening, we experienced the Big Top Chautauqua (think old tent revivals). The Chautauqua has been around for 30+ years. Its concerts bring many famous acts, but also showcase local talent. We attended a show called ‘Riding the Wind,’ a musical history of the Bayfield/Apostle Islands area. Lydia clapped along with everyone else. But when asked what her favorite part was, she enthusiastically said, “The hot dog!”

Sandstone Caves at Devil's IslandOn the Dinghy Lydia asleep on the boat

Monday was the 4th of July, and truthfully, the best Independence Day celebration I’ve had in years! With just me and Lydia, the holiday has not been all that exciting. This year, we all boated over to Madeline Island for a parade. Lydia received a beach ball, small root beer float, ice cream sandwich, and some candy. Pretty good for her first parade! She was a little timid at rushing into the street for candy (two things I generally don’t encourage!). But she got the hang of it and had fun!

Monday afternoon, my dad and I joined a blindfolded dinghy race! Dad wore the blindfold while rowing and I was his skipper. We raced around a buoy and back to shore, where I talked Dad through a mini obstacle course. We came in third, but had so much fun!

In Northern latitudes, it seems fireworks start around 10:30 pm, just as it starts getting dark (at the peak of summer). In the past, keeping Lydia up hasn’t seemed worth it. This year, however, Lydia enjoyed her first ‘real’ fireworks show. We sat on the dock and watched a couple different shows with several other sailors!

4th of July 2016

I wonder if the fireworks could be seen in Canada?!

Originally, I planned to drive home Tuesday. But, everyone kept asking, “Do you really have to leave?” Now, if I have learned anything these last few years, it’s that life is short. Sometimes, it may upend our plans. Sometimes, it may be costly or inconvenient. But there are limited chances to spend time with loved ones. We will never regret those moments in the future. Also, an open invitation from new friends doesn’t come often.

I realized that as much fun and adventure as we received, we also brought the same to our hosts. When I thought about all we would’ve missed if we hadn’t made the trip, the choice was clear: We really didn’t have to leave Tuesday. So, we stayed for another great day…and enjoyed a few more adventures!

Deep colors

 We all walked knee-deep in the Sisikiwit River, and Lydia loved the hands-on learning! We found two types of wild ferns, wild roses, and a hummingbird nest. We played in waterfalls and saw many types of beautiful trees. After enjoying a steak dinner on the way back, we saw the most gorgeous sunset heading down across the lake. A front was coming in and the wind picked up. But, we all got some great pictures!

Front coming in

It was a memorable trip, one I hope to repeat. If we had stayed home…the easy choice…we would have missed so much. And, I earned a new perspective on what’s really important!

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God, thanks for a great adventure! Thanks for the grace and freedom You bring into our lives. Help me to have the flexibility to make changes when needed and live the life You have for me. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: Have you been on a road trip lately? Where did you go? Did you learn anything new on your adventure?

Posted on in Finding Grace Weekly Recap, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting

Finding Grace #12

I love the concept of giving God a shout out for what He has done.

We don’t do that nearly enough!

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as “God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense.” Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot. I find grace overflowing in God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

full rainbow

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

    • On Monday, I went to an all-day women’s conference in Fargo. I wasn’t thrilled about sitting down for almost 10 hours, yet we had several breaks throughout the day, and this year was the best yet! Each speaker was so good; I enjoyed every minute. I even met a Registered Dietitian I have followed for years. So that was really cool! I’m so thankful for a 10-hour drop-in daycare and that Lydia is fairly flexible and enthusiastic in these situations. “Lydia, you will get to eat breakfast and lunch there…but I will pick you up before supper time.”  I packed her bag full of fun, healthy foods and she was set. “Oh, YES! I’m so excited!”
  • On Tuesday, I mowed the lawn. Not super exciting, but the forecast predicted rain all week and I wanted to stay on top of it. Then, I decided to water the grass because it was extra crispy. I haven’t watered the grass in three years, but since it is so early in the season, I needed to do something about it! Lydia played with the neighbors the entire time. We didn’t go to bed until after 9pm that night. It was so beautiful and sunny. We thoroughly enjoyed our time outside!
  • On Wednesday, I woke up sore from moving the water hose around the yard…only to see it raining. (I actually love a good rain storm and even saw a rainbow later!) Lydia had been hoping for rain all week so she could use her new Hello Kitty umbrella! So, we headed outside to walk around in the rain for a few minutes. Then, we stayed outside so Lydia could enjoy the experience. 🙂 Hey, life is short! She rode her bike in the rain, jumped in a large puddle, and picked clover “flowers.” We also played catch with a tennis ball. It was great to see her delight in such simple joys.
  • Friday afternoon’s weather brought a thunderstorm and a couple ‘little’ tornadoes in a neighboring town! Later, we spent the evening with my friend, Amy, and her family. Amy recently graduated from college and I am so proud of her. We were introduced by mutual friends, after our husbands died of cancer. We’ve been encouraged by each other over the last couple of years, as we have shared our stories. Amy has three young school-aged children and has worked so hard these last few years to provide for her family by pursuing (and finishing) her degree. College is difficult enough, but I cannot imagine doing it with kids. Like me, Amy has also relied on God to get her through. What a testament of His grace in her life… empowering Amy to do the impossible!
  • Today, Lydia and I had a special day together. We went to the Fargo zoo, had a picnic lunch at the park, had a tea party, painted her nails at home and few other activities. Our week was jammed with many fun and interesting activities, but these are the highlights. I am continually amazed to see how diverse our experiences have been each week. God is writing a wonderful story, and I am so thankful for His grace as I see it unfold day by day.

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Where did YOU see or experience God’s grace this week?

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perfectionism, Wisdom

Before and After

According to Donald Miller, every great story has at least six to eight “story turns” or “life turns.” Generally, the plot is built around story turns. These are pivotal moments in the story because once a character goes through that ‘door,’ they can never turn back. These moments change the character and life will never be the same again.

Story turns can be good, like getting married, having a baby, or landing a dream job. (The positive stress that comes with those is called eustress.) Somehow though, moments of distress seem to be the most memorable. Is that because we tend to focus on the negativity, or because they actually have the most potential to bring change?

time for change

I don’t always appreciate change. I like my comfort zone! Often, change isn’t comfortable, but it is good and necessary long-term. Change makes life interesting!

Two of my biggest story turns felt like a one-two punch: Dave’s cancer diagnosis followed by his death 364 days later. I had to learn to walk a new path. Things feel better (most days), but that’s largely because God has carried us as we have adjusted to our new normal. It still feels crazy sometimes, but God keeps reminding me to rest.

Dave and I learned so much when he was sick. But after Dave died, God brought me to a whole new level of grace. Grace for myself. I simply could not keep up with everything on my should-do list. So, I had to relax my standards…and then relax them again.

I knew if I was going to get through the grief process, I was going to need God’s help. Grief is a process. Change is a process. It hasn’t been easy, but in His strength, I’ve been able to accomplish what He has for me to do (Philippians 4:13). Jesus said He would never leave me, and I have chosen to trust Him to show me the way. I’ve relied on His power, and He has given me His peace (John 14:27).

Colossians 3_15

As a Registered Dietitian and Nutritionist, I often see “before and after” client photos or food journals. It is gratifying to see the differences after even a few changes are made. Many of them are difficult to implement, but carry life-changing potential.

So, here are some of my “before and after” snapshots (figuratively speaking):

Before, I tried to plan my way to a perfect outcome (or life). Now, I keep planning in perspective. My new motto in many areas is, “Close enough is good enough.” (It doesn’t apply to everything, but it’s a really good ‘get out of jail free’ card most days!)

Before, fear was closely linked to my perfectionist tendency to plan for all contingencies. I often had a nagging feeling that something could go wrong. Now, I praise God fear is no longer a stronghold in my life. I have learned to let things go… In fact, I rarely have any fear at all. And when I do, I catch it right away and deal with it.

Before, I worried about decisions, trying to figure out all the details in advance. I still believe planning is wise, but I don’t over-plan due to fear and worry. Now, I wait to make a decision until I have peace about it. Of course, that doesn’t mean I know all the information beforehand. But, I’m okay with that now. I don’t have to have ALL the answers to walk by FAITH. I know God will come through for me, so I wait for His peace.

May 15th 2016_Three years

Before, I would do everything I could to avoid confrontation. (I was also more of a people-pleaser!) I respectfully address and resolve conflict much quicker now, not letting simple issues drag on. Perhaps I have a shorter fuse now. One thing I do know is that Life is too short to get worked up about petty issues!

Before, I was always busy but didn’t feel like I made much progress in any area. After Dave died, God streamlined my focus. So now, I am doing less random activity, but having much more impact in areas that are important to me. I have felt much more fruitful and productive these last few years.

How about you? What are your biggest “before and after” moments?

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God, You are good! Thank You for writing our stories with Your love and grace. Thanks for being with us on the journey. Draw us near to You, in Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: As you look back on significant “life turns,” can you see how God shown His faithfulness to you? How has your life been changed as a result?

Posted on in Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Worship

It Is Well

In a few days, it will be three years since my late husband died of colon cancer. As such, I’ve been reflecting on our journey these last few years. Lydia and I think and talk about Dave often. And, I consider all the ways God helped us and came through for us.

I’ve also been thinking about how we honored Dave’s life at his funeral. Dave had no preferences, leaving the details up to me. My mom helped me choose the flowers, and I asked my dad to speak during the service. I picked out the songs.

Dave obit pic

I chose “Give Me Jesus,” because at the end of his life, Dave was still sure of his faith. Shortly before he died, when asked if there was anything he needed, Dave’s response was: “I just want Jesus.”

The other two songs were classic hymns: “Victory in Jesus” and a personal favorite, “It Is Well with My Soul.” They felt like anthems proclaiming God’s goodness and faithfulness.

Somehow, in the midst of my grief, I looked past my pain to believe God still had a good plan for me and Lydia…though I could not see or understand what that was.

These songs inspire me to praise and trust God…when things go well and when they don’t. First day. Last day. Best day. Worst day. He is constant. Just…give…me…Jesus.

Psalm 28_7

Lately, I’ve been singing a newer version of “It Is Well,” a powerful song from Bethel Music. Lydia was too little three years ago to know we sang the original (classic) version at her Daddy’s funeral. Nonetheless, it has been moving to hear her belt out some of the lyrics!

I am simply amazed at how far God has brought us. He is still with us, showing us the path ahead. He has never left me alone to fend for myself. God has held me close, a strong and steady anchor in the storms of life. I’m so thankful for His help!

That first year without Dave was a struggle, though each year has had its own challenges. At one point, I wrote down a set of personal statements, which felt like drawing a line in the sand.

I posted little notes all over the house, and declared them out loud, often several times a day. They helped me refocus on the Lord in my deepest grief. I still review them often!

It is well

Today, I am sharing them with you. I hope they help you, too, in your tough moments. God’s promises fill us with hope. Therefore, I linked a few Bible verses after each sentence if you would like to read and ponder them.

I trust You, Jesus.

Psalm 28:7, Proverbs 3:5, Isaiah 26:4, Nahum 1:7

Lord, I need You.

Psalm 9:18, Psalm 40:17, Psalm 72:12

I will wait for You.

Psalm 27:14, Psalm 33:20, Micah 7:7

You’ve never failed before!

Exodus 14:14, Joshua 21:45, Luke 1:37

I receive Your peace and provision.

Numbers 6:24-26, Job 10:12, Psalm 29:11, Isaiah 26:3

stormy sea

Do you feel defeated today? Perhaps life looks anything but well. I’ve been there. Yet, as my dad so poignantly said at his beloved son-in-law’s funeral:

“You don’t have to have all the answers to walk by faith.”

You may be experiencing peace and quiet today, or tossing to and fro. Either way, take it to Jesus. Cling to Him in both the calm and the chaos. He is the King!

As you trust in God’s love for you, stand firm on His promises. He will bring You through with Victory. And, I pray that you, too, will soon be able to say: “It is well with me.”

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God, thank You for your loyal and unwavering love. You are so good. As we speak Your truth over our circumstances, may we rest in Your grace and peace. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: When facing life’s uncertainties, do you turn to God first…or last? How can I pray for you today?

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous

Because He Is Good

With the flip of the calendar, here we are in May! I love spring in general, but it is a little bittersweet as we near the third year mark of my late husband’s death. Over the last couple weeks, I have been praying about this upcoming anniversary.

Once again, the Lord has come through for me in ways only He can. I had coffee with a friend who reaffirmed me on a day I was feeling down. I also ran into several friends at church, and each time, God used them to lift me up with encouragement. In all these instances, I didn’t mention I was sad. But it was reassuring to see how God met my need. He is so good to me!

1361914238347

Dave was thirty-four when he died, which is far too young. He was diagnosed after an emergency surgery in May 2012. He died 364 days later. It was a wild and chaotic year, but God was ever-faithful.

This spring, I am a little sad, yes.

But mostly, I am still so proud of Dave after all these years. I admire how he handled his cancer with grace and courage. I’m grateful he did not give up.

Some people may think that God let me down because Dave died. Yet, I do not feel that way. In fact, I saw God do so much more than we could ever dream. He answered big, audacious prayers and small, silent ones. It was an awful situation, no doubt. But, God was so kind and generous.

Already Stage IV, Dave’s prognosis wasn’t great at the start, but God gave us those 364 days anyway. Some people get longer, but we relished every moment we had together. I’m thankful Dave didn’t have to suffer any longer than that because it got to be pretty intense those final weeks…

Psalm 46_1

What’s more, I’m so grateful for all God taught us that year. Dave had a servant’s heart like no other, but realized he couldn’t out-give God. He learned to rest in Jesus’ sacrifice because we can’t earn God’s grace.

For me, perhaps the lessons felt much more dramatic. Emotional roller coaster is an understatement. Our cancer journey brought out some of my worst traits. And trust me, I could be a bear at times! But, God’s grace and mercy were more than enough even then.

God provided wonderful friends who helped us, often with little advanced notice. He provided extra comfort for the worst days and gave us many joys along the way. As Dave himself said, it was a “phenomenal year.”

God used these extreme circumstances to prove that He is bigger than my fears. Every. Single. One. That alone was one of the biggest breakthroughs in my life.

He set me free indeed! What grace!

Can you believe these last three years have been some of the most fruitful years of my life? It’s not been easy, though God is redeeming my pain. He has rebuilt my life from the ashes. And because He is good, I am still standing!1 Corinthians 15_57I don’t know what you are dealing with today. Maybe everything is peachy keen. But, likely it’s not. If you are struggling with something, take it to Jesus. Let Him be your refuge and strength, your righteousness and your defense—He understands exactly what you need.

You simply cannot figure out every detail and outcome of your life. Believe me, I know! But if you place your trust in Jesus alone, He will lead you through it all. Let Him be your peace. He will bring you to Victory!

God loves you and is for you! Yes, life is hard. It doesn’t always turn out like we want. But God can handle everything that concerns you. And ultimately, if your hope is in Him, you will not be disappointed!

I know that full well.

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God, great is Your faithfulness! Thank You for being a trustworthy refuge. When we are afraid, may we place our hope in You. We overcome and have Victory, in Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How has God come through for you lately? How can I pray for you?

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Procrastination

After the Leap

Did you do anything special to celebrate Leap Day this week?

For me, it was mostly like a regular day. Nonetheless, I thoroughly enjoyed watching Lydia in her gymnastics class. There were moments when I laughed wholeheartedly at the kids’ antics. They were trying so hard!

Their attempts at cartwheels, crab walks, and the balance beam had me rolling. These cute tumblers practiced somersaults and log rolls. They jumped on a trampoline, chased each other, and crawled through tunnels. The kids had such joy!

There was plenty of leaping, jumping and even some marching. When the kids fell, they got back up. When they failed, they started over. Occasionally, they asked the teacher for help. Other times, they skipped over a station if they didn’t know what to do. Interestingly, none of the kiddos were concerned if they landed correctly or not.

They were carefree and having fun!

trampoline

As you know, February 29th only comes every four years. That’s 1461 days. Yet, it goes by quickly. When I consider that four years ago, I had an infant and today, I have a preschooler…WOW!!

I also think about all that has happened in those four years, including a baby, parenthood, cancer, widowhood, grief, hard work, writing, serving, and lifelong friends.

Perhaps the last four years have turned out differently than you expected. Likely, you faced some disappointments too. Yet, most things turned out way better than I could have ever imagined. I am grateful and forever amazed to see God’s hand in it all.

It’s curious that there are a few days between Leap Day and March 4th (Forth)… What happens between leaping and marching forward? To me, that middle ground represents that transition time spent adjusting… changing… waiting… and overcoming doubt. It’s like the struggle before the victory. After the leap, it’s necessary to steady your feet before you can take any ground.

leap

Maybe you leaped into a new venture recently and aren’t sure what to do next. It probably looked exciting at first, but are you facing uncertainty now? Maybe you didn’t land where you anticipated or you’ve lost your footing.

Remember: It’s okay to pause and ask the Teacher for direction or clarity. God is eager to help us when we ask! Take some time and regroup, sure. Refocus and get some perspective.

Find your balance, yes. But don’t wait too long and don’t let fear stop you. “For God did not give us a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind” (1 Timothy 1:7).

Taking things day by day can make time seem slow—and it can be difficult to see progress. But don’t be discouraged or lose hope. By faith, trust that God’s plan for you is good. Get excited about what He is doing and have fun! There’s great joy in His presence!

jumping off table

“The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him” (Psalm 28:7).

Whatever happens in the next 1461 days, don’t worry about the outcome or end results! Let the Lord set your pace. Soon you’ll look back with amazement at how far you’ve come. And yes, God will work it for good if you trust Him (see Romans 8:28).

So keep your head up and keep marching!

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God, You know all of our days before any of them ever occur. Thank You for being with us on each step of our journey. Helps us keep moving forward. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What would you like to see happen during these next four years? What steps are you taking to move forward?

Posted on in Life is Short, Miscellaneous

With Appreciation (A Police Tribute)

On Monday morning, I drove with Lydia past an arena no more than three minutes from our house. We go this route nearly every day, but this time, something was unusual at the stop light. Hundreds of police vehicles lined up to honor the first North Dakota police officer killed on duty in 134 years.

Two weeks ago, an officer was wounded during a standoff with a domestic violence suspect. He was 33 years old and had previously served as a combat medic in two deployments. The suspect also died that night.

As our traffic light turned green, we talked about what was happening. “Do you see all those police cars, Lydia? They’re honoring a police officer killed on the job recently.” Being little, she couldn’t understand the impact on our normally quiet community.

But, I teared up with thankfulness and sadness at the sight. It was amazing to see such solidarity in honoring a hero’s life. Thousands of police officers came from several states and Canada. Though, I also grieved because of the tragedy and loss.

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I am so glad for the care shown to the officer’s widow and family. And, I am equally grateful for the acknowledgement of two widows and families suffering.

I pray for strength and peace for both families as they process how the community rallied around them. I pray the public love and support will bring great comfort and healing to these new widows in the coming days.

These tragedies are unifying for several reasons, including the shared loss we feel.

I identify with the officer because of his age. While I did not know him, we could have been classmates. Also, he was married with children; I can relate. I don’t live in the same area as the standoff, but many of my friends do. These days, it just hits home.

Police, firemen, paramedics, EMTs, those in the military, etc. make huge personal sacrifices on a regular basis. Many of these brave men and women start off as volunteers!

Our personal safety is something we often take for granted. But ‘first responders’ are in danger whenever they go to work. They also typically see us at our worst; as such, I’m sure they don’t get thanked enough.

I do not have a police officer in my extended family, but I have close friends who do. I have not personally experienced domestic violence, nor will I pretend to know how that feels. Yet, there are many emotional parallels in times of grief.

While my journey into widowhood has been different, it does help to know you’re not alone. I’m thankful people are pulling together for mutual support and encouragement.

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As we returned home later Monday afternoon, our normal exit off the highway was blocked. Instead, the police were in a 21-mile procession through Fargo and Moorhead, Minnesota. Once again, I pointed them out to Lydia. It felt like history in the making.

We took the next exit and backtracked home. We reached our intersection again and the police vehicles were still passing through. So, we parked at a grocery store to watch across the street. Lots of other people had the same idea.

Several times over the years I’ve been teary-eyed in my car—usually the result of a song on the radio. It doesn’t happen as often these days…but Monday, I was in good company!

These people put their lives at risk for ours. They seek to protect us and I appreciate all they do for us. It is wonderful to see everyone pay respect to someone who deserves it. Thank you for your service, Officer Moszer. Rest in peace.

“Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends” (John 15:13).

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God, thank You for the brave men and women who are called to protect us. Please bless them as they serve. And please provide special comfort and peace to these families and this community. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: Who are the heroes in your life? Have you thanked them lately?