Category: Being Gracious

Posted on in Being Gracious, Miscellaneous

Chocolate ‘Kissy’ Things

Recently my daughter, Lydia, and I had conversation that went like this:

“I like those chocolate kissy things,” said Lydia, walking into the office. “But I don’t know what they are called.”

“Do you mean Hershey’s kisses?” I asked, smiling.

“Yes,” said Lydia. “But, you have to kiss them before you eat them.”

chocolate cherry

We weren’t eating chocolate, but clearly she takes after me! Ok, kiss the chocolate before devouring it…Then, on a whim, I asked, “How do you show someone you love them?”

With no prompting, and only a few questions for clarity, Lydia thought about it for a moment and said:

Be kind when you talk to them.

Give them a gift (such as a toy or sticker).

Give them a hug (but be gentle).

You could help them do a puzzle.

Go visit them (on an airplane or in the car).

Lydia’s responses were simple, but somewhat unexpected. It may be a little kid’s perspective, but I think my sweet girl is spot on. In fact, right away, she nailed every one of the five love languages Gary Chapman writes about.

These include words of affirmation, receiving gifts, acts of service, physical touch, and quality time. It’s helpful to know the love language of those around us because someone can totally miss—or misunderstand—the treasure you think you’re offering. Knowing someone’s primary love language may even help resolve conflicts.

(Clearly, that is not meant to manipulate a person or situation!)

box of chocolates

Like the best of chocolates, our gifts are meant to be shared. Every day, we have the opportunity to demonstrate God’s love—to be His kiss to the world. Sometimes, as adults, we make it too complicated. Or, we forget about the ‘love part’ and just ‘devour’ people!

Here are five easy ways to love on others:

  • Use your words to encourage people or bring comfort, like a glass of lemonade.
  • Give a gift. It doesn’t have to be expensive. Share a book or buy a cup of coffee!
  • Show appropriate affection based on the level of friendship.
  • Help someone complete a project or meet a deadline.
  • Spend time doing an activity with someone. Take turns choosing the activity.

There are many ways to show people you love them. Often, it starts with a willing heart to serve. Show up and meet a need. Give to others out of your abundance or out of your ‘personal stash.’ (This is not limited to chocolate…) It might cost your time, effort, or money; but it all counts if done with a loving attitude.

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails” (1 Corinthians 13:4-8).

Popular at weddings, these verses (above) make a great check point for daily life too.

Am I being patient? Was that kind? Was I bragging?

How is my attitude? Am I giving the benefit of the doubt? (and so on)

gift

According to 1 John 4, God is love (v8) and now we love each other because He loved us first (v19). Jesus Christ is God’s special gift to demonstrate just how much we are loved. And, He gives us many additional blessings too. But, a gift is useless if left unopened…
Let’s share God’s gifts with others!

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Father God, thank You for Your unconditional love. Help us understand and receive all You have given us. And, help us share Your love with others too. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you unwrapped God’s gift(s)—His special kiss to you? Do you know your love language(s)?

Posted on in Being Gracious, Miscellaneous, Wisdom

Little Drummer Girl

At home, Lydia likes to bang on her own makeshift drum—an old Garrett’s popcorn tin from when she was little. The popcorn is long gone, but it has provided hours of headaches entertainment in our house over the years. Ahh, my little drummer girl!

“I wonder what the little drummer boy’s name was.” –Lydia’s Christmas carol commentary

In the song, The Little Drummer Boy, the (fictitious) little boy has nothing in comparison to other gifts brought. Yet, he gave what he could…a simple song. In some ways, we are all like the poor little drummer boy.

God is the Giver of all good things (James 1:17). He has given us the best gift in His Son, Jesus. Nothing we can bring will ever match His glorious sacrifice. All that we are or ever will be already belongs to Him, because it came from Him. So we can only give a portion back to God out of what He already gave.

The value of what we bring comes in the form of gratefulness—humbly accepting all He has done for us. As any loving parent, aunt, or uncle understands, it brings God great joy when we praise, honor, and adore His precious Son, Jesus.

What can we offer Him in return? In Luke 10:27, Jesus said that we should love the Lord with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. This might include your time, effort, or money (1 Chronicles 21:22-25). God loves a cheerful giver, and out of His own abundance He ensures we always have plenty (see 2 Corinthians 9:7-8).

You may not feel like you have much to contribute, but like the little drummer boy (whatever his name), we each have a gift to bring… And when you lay all of it before the King, He takes it and makes something good.

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The great news is that because of Jesus, we don’t have to stay “stuck” in our circumstances or grief (or any emotion). We can rejoice that God continues to work all things out for our good and His glory (Romans 8:28). Praise God!

In our brokenness, we become a vessel He uses to bless others.

Because we are all so unique, this will look differently for each of us. For me, this recently has meant bringing my grief to the Lord and then being available to talk with others in their pain. Helping others has been healing in and of itself!

For someone else, it may be caroling at a nursing home, visiting a prisoner, or feeding the hungry. Maybe babysitting, writing an encouraging note, or giving a hug is more your style. Be generous. It all counts! They’re all gifts to the One who receives it. (see Matthew 25:35-40).

“And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him” (Colossians 3:17).

Each of our gifts, talents and struggles will be different. But, we ALL honor the King when we bring our very best to Him.

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Father God, Thank You for Jesus and all the wonderful things you have given us. We can’t out give You, God. You are so generous to provide good things for us. Help us bring our very best to you. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions to consider: What are your gifts? How might they honor God and help someone else?

Posted on in Being Gracious, Miscellaneous

Grace and Gratitude: More Than Enough

During the first two years we lived in Fargo, Dave and I were members of a community-supported agriculture (CSA) program. Our CSA delivered seasonal vegetables from spring until fall. We also attended a few “harvest events” where we picked our own veggies—pumpkins, gourds, melons, corn, green beans, onions, potatoes, tomatoes, beets, cabbages, carrots, and more. At times, we could barely shut the car doors!

We ate or froze as much as we could, but still we had so much left. I hate to be wasteful, especially with such nutritious foods. So, we gave away all the surplus. We dropped off bags loaded with ears of sweet corn to our neighbors. Anyone who dropped by to visit left with us saying, “Here, take a bucket of potatoes! Do you like cantaloupe? Please, take two!”

CSA Veggies 2011

I love the parallel between the bounty we experienced and the plenitude in our lives. God blesses us so we can be a blessing to others (see Genesis 12:2). It’s as if each blessing we receive has seeds to share. We cannot contain nor keep them all for ourselves! With gratitude, we can extend God’s love to others.

As we cultivate thankfulness, our lives overflow with joy. As we acknowledge God’s grace and love in our lives, He doesn’t give just a little joy…He gives an abundance! God gives us blessings because of His loving kindness to us. Every good gift is from Him (see James 1:17).

I love these song lyrics by Walt Harrah:

“Think about His love
Think about His goodness
Think about His grace that’s brought us through
For as high as the heavens above
So great is the measure of our Father’s love
Great is the measure of our Father’s love”

As you recall the blessings in your life, write them down. Praise God as you reflect on what He has done for you in the past. Be thankful for the present and look forward to the future. We certainly have a lot to be thankful for.

Giving thanks goes beyond material things. Money cannot buy love, happiness, or gratefulness. Our relationships are the greatest blessings from God. Being together and celebrating His goodness in our lives is more important than the stuff we have.

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At Thanksgiving, we visit loved ones and listen to heartwarming stories. We eat delicious food and take part in family traditions. Growing up, my family often had a few extra place settings around the table for friends with nowhere to go for the holiday.

Since college and now in Fargo, I too, have spent many Thanksgiving celebrations with families other than my own. Friends have invited me to their celebrations because of the distance and timing of school or work responsibilities. I’m grateful for the generosity of all those friends, who in many ways have become like family to me.

Hopefully, you’ll see loved ones this week. If not, don’t be discouraged. Instead, take heart. Choose joy. Turn worries into prayers. In every situation, give thanks (see 1 Thess. 5:16-18). God is a good Father and loving Provider. Rest assured there’s a place for you around His table! He longs to fill your life with goodness!

“Let us come before His presence with a song of thanksgiving;
Let us shout joyfully to Him with songs” (Psalm 95:2).

Father God, thank You for the beautiful world You have made. Thank You for providing good gifts to us! Thank You for the love of family and friends. Help us seek Your sweet and refreshing grace. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

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Questions: What is your favorite Thanksgiving memory? What are your greatest blessings? How can you be a blessing to others?

 

Posted on in Being Gracious, Miscellaneous, Wisdom, Words

Telephone Lines and Grace Connections

Do you remember the game, Telephone? I whisper a message to someone who tells it to the next person. And on it goes until the last person repeats the message. Generally, what happens is the message gets all mixed-up and comes out funny. Or rude!

Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone in 1876. Telephones then became instrumental in connecting people via technology innovation. Do you think Mr. Bell envisioned all of our communication and technological advancements since then?

I wonder if we have really made all that much progress…

You see, our communication can still be shaky. I’ll speak only for myself—I don’t always say the right thing. I can lose my temper and say things I regret. Then I catch myself, apologize, and do better. But that’s no excuse for my poor behavior.

Ephesians 4:29 says, “ Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen” (my emphasis added).

Can you hear me now?

Telephone lines

People are like telephone poles, and grace is sent between the poles. Standing alone—not connected—they’re useless. Telephone poles need to be linked together, one after another, until the message gets transmitted.

What is the message we need to share? Good News! Pass it on!

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16).

If a telephone pole or line goes down, the connection is lost. So it is with the message of God’s grace. Our words have potential to disconnect the very people God wants to reach. Or, we can speak with loving grace—connect others to Jesus!

No, I’m not going to make you eat soap, nor will I provide a list of “appropriate” words. Instead, let us simply extend a line of grace and carry the loving message of Jesus Christ!

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Grace can come in many forms and kind deeds, but our words carry special weight (see Proverbs 18:21). We’ve probably all had something negative said to us or about us. That hurts, and the impact can be devastating. Often, those in close proximity can do the worse damage. Yet, the effect doesn’t remain localized. It influences the whole pathway.

The words we speak to ourselves are just as important as words spoken to each other.

Have you experienced the power of an encouraging word when you needed it the most? I’ve had several moments in the last few years where the path was unclear. It has been difficult at times to see progress or know if I need to make changes.

Over time, I’ve had the opportunity to share my story with new people at church. I also invite them to a class I facilitate, which helps volunteers get involved. Once, during a prolonged period of uncertainty, someone introduced me like this:

“This is Natalie. She does a great job in her role, and we are so thankful for her.”

It was not fancy or elaborate, but I was encouraged to know I was making a difference! Before that, I wasn’t even aware of the effect of my effort.

Even six months later, I remembered those empowering words. In fact, my whole outlook changed as I suddenly had more clarity in my vision and purpose.

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“Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.”   Proverbs 16:24

Let nothing interrupt the flow of grace in your life.

 Do not miss an opportunity to be an ENCOURAGER to someone else. Look for the inherent value in others. Use your words to speak Life with a well-timed word!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Miscellaneous, Wisdom

Would You Like Some Brownie Points?

In some ways, grace sounds a lot like simple etiquette. And while I have absolutely no plans and no desire to become the next Dear Abby…

TherearenoBrownie

Here are some easy ways to earn ‘Brownie points’ with me:

1. Be gracious. If you are rude or inconsiderate, I will still try to be kind when we are together, because of Jesus and in His Name. 🙂 (But, it is much more pleasant when your words and actions are seasoned with grace.)

2. Be honest. Generally, honesty and integrity should be first. But, if you aren’t gracious, it’s hard to connect with you…even if there’s something difficult I need to hear. (If the truth is spoken with a loving attitude, I’ll understand you have my best interest at heart.)

3. Keep your word. Let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ Follow through on what you say you will do. If you can’t do something, that’s alright, no problem! (Just don’t sign up for it…No wishy-washy or empty promises, please!)

4. Be reliable and show up on time. Okay, those may be two separate things. (But they go hand-in-hand in my book.)

5. Pick up the phone when necessary… or just because. So many messages get mixed up via text and email. An encouraging word is always welcome! (I also appreciate a quick, “I received your message, thanks!” but I will let that one slide…ahem.)

6. Don’t read (more) into every single word or action. Let’s give each other the benefit of the doubt. Most people would never intend to hurt someone else’s feelings. Accidents happen. People make mistakes. Be quick to forgive. (As Joyce Meyer says, “Just because you are given offense, doesn’t mean you have to take it.”)

7. Smile! As my Grandpa Y. always said, “It doesn’t cost anymore to smile.” He was a very smart and well-respected man! (So, you’ll be smart if you take this advice and smile!)

8. Buy or send me chocolate. Brownies are only one suggestion! I like dark chocolate best, and my address is____________. (And yes, they do send cookies in the mail!)

Okay, okay, the last one may have been a little joke! As a Registered Dietitian and foodie, I still believe in and promote a healthy balance.

I don’t need piles of chocolate all at one time. But if someone could make a sign-up sheet, that would be great! 😉

These are general guidelines with no one particularly in mind. And this is not an exhaustive list. But seriously. A little grace goes a long way! Thanks in advance!

“Do to others as you would like them to do to you” (Luke 6:31).

Questions: What is on your list? How can I earn ‘Brownie points’ with you?! 🙂

Posted on in Being Gracious, Miscellaneous, Wisdom

Peace, Peace, Peace!

I was out shopping recently and saw this wooden sign (below). I kept coming back to it.

I love little song birds, as well. So, I bought it and counted it as a win-win!

Colossians 3:15 came to mind when I saw it. “And let the peace of God rule in your hearts…”

This bird cracks me up, tweeting “peace,peace,peace,…” 😀 The birds have been up around 5 am or so lately. I can just imagine them tweeting this all day!

Peace Peace Peace

The Amplified version mentions “peace as an umpire” and I am imagining a little bird tweeting incessantly in my ear…. “peace,peace,peace,PEACE,don’t forget about PEACE,peace is vital,peace,peace..”

Sometimes things are hectic in our environment, sometimes internally. But, how we react is up to us. Jesus is our peace, so this is a good reminder of peace with God, ourselves, and others.

 Do whatever it takes to live at peace!!