In Good Company

In about ten days, Lydia and I will celebrate Dave being in Heaven for eight years. I say “celebrate” but that does not mean we don’t miss him every day. I’m simply trying to keep an eternal perspective because that’s the only way to keep moving forward.

I mentioned this previously, but I continue to see God working all around me, especially in terms of grief and loss. I am alright with that.

For instance, at work, I once talked with a Veteran who lost her twin sister. She thanked me for acknowledging her grief, and we had a wonderful conversation. I’ve learned sometimes I have to reach someone’s heart before I can address the “work” that needs attention in their head (i.e. their mindset or habits).

Then, recently, I talked with a Veteran who has been in my care for about a year and a half. He has been through all sorts of health issues including cancer and multiple falls.

I called this man to check in with him, nutritionally, but I also wanted to offer my condolences. His wife of fifty years had suddenly died. She had been such a support for him, and now she is gone. I knew it would be a tough conversation, but he reminded me about the book, A Grief Observed, by CS Lewis. Suffice it to say we had a God connection.

It was a good conversation, and I briefly explained that I was a widow. Professionally, I don’t share my story often, but it made sense in the moment. I was simply following my heart, grateful that he knows the Lord, too. That made all the difference.

My very next patient was a Veteran whose sister recently died after a brief illness. I thought that was ironic, dealing with grief twice in the same day. For this man, I did not share my story because it wasn’t necessary. I was able to encourage him just by listening.

After that, I met with still yet another Veteran. I was supposed to educate him about one illness, but then he mentioned he is receiving treatment for colon cancer. (He actually was wearing his chemo pouch, just like Dave had to do.) He mentioned one of Dave’s doctors, and his chemo regimen was the same, too. I almost couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

To my surprise, this Veteran has been dealing with his cancer for a few years and has almost zero side effects. He does not feel overly weak and still has good appetite. He is still able to be active remodeling old buildings! That made me so happy. I did not explain my background, but inwardly, I was celebrating and thanking God for giving this man good quality time with his family.

I don’t know why God has me talk with all these people (besides for work reasons), but I am grateful He can use my pain to relate to and serve others. No matter who we talk with each day, we can look for similarities and ways to connect.

Perhaps we discuss something funny, or perhaps it’s something sad. Either way, chances are God can use it to bring comfort. Each of us has pain that only He can heal. Once we understand that, we will see that we’re in good company.

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God, thanks for Your redemption and for using me to bless others. Thanks that my story can bring comfort and healing to others. You don’t waste my pain or my tears. All glory and honor to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Do you see God at work in you story? Will you let Him use you to bless others and bring healing?

Tasks: Next time you sense an opportunity where God can work, don’t resist. Just pray and trust that it’s His timing. Your job is simply to be obedient, not worry about the outcome. Let Jesus bring the SUPER to your natural abilities!

Tenderhearted

As we go through April, I have been reminded that the 8th anniversary of Dave’s death is drawing near. May 15th will be here before we know it! Overall, I am doing well.

But, I’ve noticed a few issues steering me toward elements of grief. First, I’ve seen a few memories pop up on my phone or online. One was a video of a four-month-old Lydia “talking” to me. This was a few weeks before Dave’s sudden cancer diagnosis, so it is quite poignant. Sweet little Lydia babbling away, while none of us realized what was coming.

Second, I’ve received several prayers for health concerns. It may be entire families dealing with COVID (parents and children), or others receiving heartbreaking news or diagnoses. Some of these issues are acute and some are chronic.

One family, who I’ve known (loosely) for many years, is not dealing with cancer but other long-term health issues, which came on suddenly after a recent accident. The doctors are hopeful, but they have a long road ahead of them.

Online, the family shares the realities of their hardships, but they also shares songs and words of hope. It reminds me of when Dave was so sick and it felt like I was trying to run the race of faith for both of us. It was exhausting, but feeling everyone’s love made all the difference. Thanks for your prayers!

I do not see these memories and issues as mere coincidences. They aren’t just popping up though it feels that way at times. Instead, I sense God drawing me close and leading me to stay sensitive to His Holy Spirit. I’m grateful for these gentle reminders.

In addition to memories and prayer requests, I have been reading my NLT Chronological Bible and am learning some new things! Also, I am watching the Chosen television series. I downloaded the app and usually watch it on my tablet.

This series is powerful and it helps me see the Bible come alive. I love the character development, and it’s a great way to draw close to God’s Truth. From portraying the generosity of Jesus’ Mother to Matthew’s history and behaviors, which set him at odds with the other Disciples, the show has a lot of plausibility.

While there is no substitute for Scripture, I like to look up the Bible passages that are seen in each episode. Still, I really appreciate the creativity. It opens my imagination and helps me see God at work in my life, too.

There are some very moving moments, and I find myself thinking about the show for days. I even get a little choked up when I consider that millions of people all over the world are also watching… and learning… more of Who Jesus Is.

Those who know me best will tell you I tend to get teary-eyed when the Holy Spirit gets ahold of my heart. Sometimes it is a little embarrassing to cry easily, but I am calling it a win for being tenderhearted!

I don’t normally describe myself as such, and I used to try to be more stoic (in order to appear strong, perhaps?). Keep it together, Natalie! 😉 Yet, pain and the heartbreak of grief brings a new level of emotional acuity.

So, I don’t apologize for my feelings anymore. We don’t live by our emotions, but they can help us see Jesus more clearly…. and the needs around us.

If anything, I hope other people are encouraged to be themselves and sit with their feelings. Stay tenderhearted before the Lord and see what He will do in your life and through you to bless others.

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God, I praise You for using all my circumstances to make me more like Jesus. You are so good. Help me trust You and keep my heart pliable before You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Do you describe yourself as more stoic or tenderhearted? (I can be both, depending on the situation!) How can I be praying for you today?

Tasks: Listen to the song, “Jesus I Believe,” by Big Daddy Weave. Instead of running from pain, let it turn your heart to Jesus. He loves you so much!!

Unsolicited Gratitude

“Thanks, Mom!” Lydia yelled down the hall, recently.

“For what?!” I replied back. I couldn’t think of anything I had done for her in the previous moments leading up to this.

“For just being a great mom!” She came over and gave me a big hug.

There are plenty of times as a parent when I prompt Lydia to say thanks. But, in this instance it made my day to receive such unsolicited gratitude.

Lately, Lydia has been extra loving and kind. I have seen her grown in character, and I have given her some extra responsibilities and freedom at home. She has responded well and risen to the occasion. 

She also surprised me when she freely offered a Reese’s peanut butter egg (someone gave her two). As you can imagine, these days, we’re having a lot of fun laughing and spending time together. I’m grateful for my girl!

My inherent pride in Lydia reminds me of how God must feel about us when we praise Him out of the blue, or when we thank Him out of an abundance of gratitude.

He loves us as His dearly loved children. After all, if we have accepted Jesus’ loving sacrifice and forgiveness for our sins, we are joint heirs with Him!

As we grow in Godly character, we are given extra responsibilities and freedom.

I’m sure it makes Him so proud as we rise to the occasion!

Sometimes we can make life and our relationship with God complicated. But, at other times it seems so simple. He draws near to us as we draw near to Him, and in His presence if fullness of joy!

We bless God when we shout our thanks and sing His praises. It’s kind of like a bunch of flowers in full bloom. The aroma is as powerful as the flowers are pretty. What grace!

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God, thanks for Your great love and kindness! Thank You for your many blessings. May I rest in this new level of understanding Your love. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: How do you see God’s love through the people in your life?

Tasks: As you go about your day, spontaneously sing praises to God and shout out thanks for all He has done for you. As soon as you think of something praiseworthy, go for it! This could be in the shower, in your car, on the stairs, in an elevator, while taking a walk…

Finding Grace #262

You may have seen the acronym GRACE as God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense. Grace is also God’s unmerited favor, or God doing for us what we cannot.

I find grace overflowing with God’s love, joy, peace, blessings, mercy, power, provision, protection, and wisdom. Thank You, Jesus!

Where did I find God’s love and favor—His abundant grace—this week?

This was an awesome week!! On Sunday, we Zoomed with family. It’s been so fun to check in every week! It has become one of my favorite things to do every week!

On Monday, I dropped of my tax documents to my accountant. I have various things to keep track of, and it’s good to have help! As a single mom, it’s one less thing for me to have to do. It’s always nice to get a refund, but this year, it was split. I owe some and get some back! No matter what I am so grateful for God’s provision!

I had many friendly patients this week. It’s so fun to talk with Veterans who are eager to learn about nutrition. It’s more than that though. It’s good to make the ‘human connection,’ and that was a highlight of my week!

We got a little snow this week, after it was mostly melted away. This snow won’t stick around for long, but it triggered my snow removal service to come. I was very happy about that, as I got to sleep until my normal alarm went off.

On Wednesday, I called Fitbit customer service for help. I happened to talk to someone who was working from home… in Jamaica! We had a good conversation while he answered my questions. Turns out, Lydia’s device is out of warranty, but he gave us a 35% off coupon so we could order a new one! She was so grateful and excited!

Today has been beautiful, with warmer weather and little wind. Lydia went to a friend’s house to play, while I visited with a couple friends, ran errands, and tackled some chores around the house. When Lydia returned, we took a walk to other ‘little free libraries’ and delivered some books we were done with. I also updated some of the books in ours!

Don’t forget to turn your clocks forward one hour tonight!

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These are only a few examples, but God’s grace never runs out!

There’s grace in every situation—we just need to look for it. God promises if we seek Him, we will find Him (see Jeremiah 29:13)!

Mind the Gap

Many years ago, my sister and I joined several other high school students on a two-week adventure to Europe. We flew across the Pond to visit England, France, Italy, and Switzerland. It was a wonderful trip, and we made many memories together!

As we visited London, we took the subway system (a.k.a. the Underground, or Tube). We got a kick out of the various signs, in particular one that said “Mind the Gap.” This referred to the space between the railcars and the platform. Of course, one could be killed if they fell down there.

Then, this week, a pastor at church reminded us there’s never a time in our lives when we have it all figured out. Even when most things are going well, there’s still random things that may pop up.

There’s going to be a gap between our reality and what we desire. It can be frustrating at times, but if all of our problems were so easily solved, we wouldn’t need Jesus!

So, what do we do about it all? First, we stay close to Jesus. Then, we mind the gap!

When riding the Tube, or any other subway or train, we can make sure we are ready first. We can:

Be prepared. Plan ahead for various possibilities or issues we might face. We can’t prevent all problems, but we aren’t without options! For a trip, I’d bring various articles. Purse. (Check.) Passport (Check.) Proper currency. (Check.) Snacks. (Check.) In life, this might be a savings account or not taking on excessive debt.

Make sure your stuff doesn’t weigh you down or trip you up! If you forget something, you can always get it when you arrive at your destination. Life is like that, too. Take what you need and leave the rest. Don’t overthink it!

Be aware of your surroundings and circumstances. Notice the atmosphere and read each situation correctly. Then, adapt or change as needed. Flexibility is key!

Wait your turn. Don’t rush ahead and leave anyone or anything behind! You will get where you need to go. God’s timing is perfect.

Be willing to stand and let someone else sit. Kindness matters.

Stay focused. Pay attention to each stop and don’t miss yours! Even small distractions could sidetrack us, if we’re not careful. Put down your phone and talk with a stranger, once in a while!

Live joyfully, looking forward to adventures. Focus on what is going well, instead of shortcomings. With a good attitude, we can make the best of uncertain circumstances.

Ultimately, only Jesus can fill the gaps in our lives. With His help, we can do all He made us to do. We can trust Him and join Him for the ride of our lives!

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Lord, thanks for filling in the gaps in our lives with You. Forgive us when we try to fill those gaps with other things. May we not forget You are more than enough for us! In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you ever been to England? Have you been on the London Underground system? What is your favorite touristy spot to visit?

Tasks: Life is more about the journey than the destination. For fun, consider how life is like a public transit system!

Lessons in Miscommunication

On Monday night, Lydia and I started a movie that was based on Malta, an island in the Mediterranean. She had never heard of this before, so I had her look it up online. We found the flag and other pertinent details about the country.

I also told her that’s where (the Apostle) Paul was shipwrecked on his way to be tried in Rome. He was bitten by a poisonous snake, and the natives were surprised when he was unharmed. Paul was invited to winter there, and he healed several people and discussed Jesus with those in charge. (See Acts 27-28)

So, last night, we went to the store and bought blueberries, among other items. At home, Lydia noticed they were from Chile and asked where that is.

L: Is that near Italy?

N: No, Chile is in South America. Italy is in the Mediterranean… Oh, let’s finish that movie tonight, if we can.

L: Ok, sure! Was Paul born in Italy?

N: No, he was born in Tarsus (modern day Turkey?). He was a Roman citizen, but he was also Jewish, from the tribe of Benjamin. He ended up in Jerusalem and persecuted those who first believed in Jesus. But, then he had a lifechanging encounter with Jesus! 🤓

L: Oh, so does that mean Aunt Livi is Jewish?

N: 🤔 … ??  Oh! I thought you meant the Apostle Paul because we were talking about the Mediterranean! But, you were talking about Uncle Paul. No, his family is Italian, but he was born in the US. And, no, he’s not Jewish and neither is Aunt Livi!

L, cracking up: Mom!! Oh my gosh!

Ah, lessons in communication… or is that miscommunication?! 😆

Perhaps I went a little overkill with Lydia. But, I try to take advantage of all the opportunities I can! Plus, I sincerely thought we were on the same page!

Lydia and I laughed so much at how one thing lead to another. Though, I wonder how many times we make assumptions about someone means. This example is funny, but sometimes, there is more at stake!

This was a good reminder for me to make sure to pay attention to what Lydia is saying and what she actually wants to know. I don’t need to overexplain, and I don’t want to be insensitive to her needs. It pays to pause and listen!

If anything, we can take a cue from the Apostle Paul. We can speak up and speak clearly, pointing people back to Jesus. While I may not always do it perfectly, I am grateful He already knows what’s on my heart and mind. May we use our words to bring glory to God, trusting He will give us the right words when we need them.

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God, thanks for always communicating Your love for us clearly. Thanks for making Your love personal to each of us. Thanks for listening and leading us every day. May we listen and understand Your heart so we can translate that to others. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: Do you have a funny story of miscommunication?

Tasks: Tell me your favorite (funny) story of miscommunication… bonus points if it is with a kid! Remember to pause periodically to make sure you are communicating correctly.

 

Led By Peace

This week, I was reminded about the importance of good communication. Basically, this comes down to saying what you mean, and meaning what you say.

Recently, I called someone to check in after receiving a strange text message. How I read the text was not at all how it was intended!

I hoped it was just a misunderstanding, and I was willing to let it go. But, through prayer, I felt the Lord calling me to be brave and do the ‘difficult thing,’ that is not take the easy way out. I am so glad I did!

Yes, I could have just made assumptions and avoided the conversation. But, I took initiative to reach out and clear the air. I accepted what was said about me because that was somewhat true, yet I was concerned about the implications. I simply wanted clarification, not necessarily an apology. 

The relationship is important to me, so I want to preserve it. I am willing to give the benefit of the doubt, but it’s also good to make sure we are on the same page.

Often, we are willing to put up with relationship drama because we want to avoid conflict. I used to be like that more, but I have learned to address things before they fester.

How many times to we let these minor issues become major barriers in our relationships? Or worse, how often do we stay offended and let ourselves be distracted from what’s really important? Do we hinder ourselves from accomplishing greater things because of petty issues?

True peace isn’t the absence of conflict; it’s knowing Jesus is with us in the midst of it all. Additionally, it’s following His plan to resolve our issues, not trying to bring our own resolution. Instead of jumping to conclusions, peace means we rest in God and let Him take care of us!

At the end of the day, it takes courage to speak up and resolve issues before they escalate to conflicts. It takes maturity to believe the best about someone when you are hurt. That doesn’t mean you need to be a doormat or allow drama. Know the difference!

Really, there is no single right answer for each of our problems. Each of us may come to different conclusions based on our personalities or other factors. That’s okay!

But either way, we need God’s wisdom to know when to let things go and when to speak up. As long as we are in tune with what He is doing in our lives, we will know the right path to take. He will lead us, and we can follow the path of peace.

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Father God, thanks for all You do for me. Thanks for helping me walk Your path of peace and for giving me strong relationships. May I be a good friend to others. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Are you one who avoids difficult conversations or runs into them head-on? How do people generally respond to your approach? Is it effective or can you tweak it a bit?

Tasks: Take some time and evaluate the significant relationships in your life. This may include friends, family, neighbors, and coworkers. Be willing to make changes, if needed, including having difficult conversations you may have been putting off.

What You Make of It

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right.” Henry Ford is given credit for this quote, and he was known for his ingenuity with cars and assembly lines. I’m sure he knew what he was talking about!

In my opinion, this quote isn’t just for accomplishing tasks or becoming successful. It also applies to our attitudes. Life is often what you make of it!

In America, the Land of Opportunity, this is especially true.

Whether you like it or not, today is Inauguration Day! Regardless of how you think or feel, it is a part of our American democracy and process. History is being made, and that is worth celebrating!

Over the next four years, we are in for something different. Good or bad, time will tell how it all shakes out. But, we can be sure God already knows. And, we know that He loves each person, whether they are leaving the White House or coming into it.

While the American political administration is changing hands today, God never changes. In fact, our American ideals (such as freedom, justice, and independence) originate with Jesus. His perfect plan still stands.

In the meantime, we have work to do. In fact, it will take all of us working together.

I’d love to say the next four years will be easy, but I’ve been around long enough to know that’s likely not true. We may not like all that happens or agree with choices made.

You may be thrilled or unenthused about the change in administrations. But, how you spend the next four years is up to you. You have a choice to make between GRRR or GRACE.

Your attitude will largely determine how you experience the next four years. Regardless of who you voted for, it’s your make or break moment. The outcome is up to you!

I am walking into this with hope and humility.

I am praying, and I am doing my part. I will respect the authority of our government, and I will trust that God will use all of this for good.

I will not expect things to change overnight, but I will be patient and keep praising God.

I will not stir up strife, but I will be a peacemaker and spread joy. I will show grace to those who think (or vote) differently than I do. Ultimately, I represent Christ.

In short, I will keep on keeping on! I will continue living well and making wise choices. I will continue looking out for those in need. I will do my best to bring change and have difficult conversations. I will remain open-minded and find the good!

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Father in Heaven, we need Your help and guidance. Lord, have mercy on our nation and protect us. Draw us close to You and heal our hearts. May we follow after You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Do you plan to watch the US Inauguration? Do you know anyone in the National Guard who is there today?

Task: How you approach each day is so important. Regardless of whether you are happy or upset today, consider flipping the switch. Choose the joy that comes from trusting God!

GRRR or GRACE?!

How are you doing this week? There is a lot of heavy stuff going on.

With all the drama and anger and angst in recent days (amid real, practical concerns), I can’t help but think we might be missing the point. Are we playing into the Enemy’s hand, helping him reach his goal of distracting everyone from what’s really important?

May we be wise as serpents and innocent as doves (Matthew 10:16).

We are called to stand for justice and freedom, among other things. But we need to do it the right way, with love, respect, kindness, mercy, grace, and “salt.” If we’re not careful, we will only be a resounding gong and drag the Name of Jesus through the mud.

Now, I am not telling you to be silent if God Himself is telling you to speak up. But we are still only messengers, instruments of grace. Our goal should be to bring people to Jesus and let Him sort it all out.

Also, I am not telling you to disengage or ignore what is going on. The Spirit of Antichrist is on the move. But this is nothing new. It has been foretold for thousands of years. Yes, current events play into it, but this is only the beginning of the end.

It will get worse, and I am simply asking you to be wise. Each of us was born into the modern era for such a time as this. Ask God what His purpose and plan is for YOU.

You don’t have to think like me or do what I do. I am just asking you to truly look at all sides of each issue and understand what is at stake. Be willing to have difficult conversations, without losing control of your emotions. Don’t be cocky or insincere.

Boldness looks different for each of us, but compassion is always in style. Instead of telling someone how they should react, ask, “What is God telling you…?”

Perhaps that will be the most productive conversation you have today!

Soooo… Are we living with a spirit of GRRR (yes, just like it sounds), or are we living by God’s GRACE?! As you can probably imagine, GRRR is based on our physical and emotional reactions, our preferences. GRACE as you may recall, is God’s Riches At Christ’s Expense.

A spirit of GRRR is just that. Walking around grumbling and complaining, not really adding anything of value but detracting from the main issues. Getting stuck on petty arguments (having to be right) and getting upset when things turn for the worse. Feeling stress and anxiety for things that are outside your control.

A spirit of GRACE means relying on God to get you through. Trusting that He is with you and for you. Acknowledging His presence and provision. Praising Him, God even when things get tough. Keeping your focus on Jesus, not all the noise. Knowing you don’t have to have all the answers because He is all you really need.

Jesus is the source of all grace and truth. We were bought at a price. We are dead to our own desires and alive in Christ. His agenda is what matters, not ours. That is, loving people sacrificially and drawing them to Himself.

Before you click share on that hot-topic article, THINK through these questions:

Are we making the most of our time, becoming like Jesus?

Are we extending the benefit of the doubt toward those who disagree?

Are we accepting responsibility for being the change we want to see?

Our Sovereign Father cares for us. He has not abandoned His children or left us to fend for ourselves. He will enable us to endure. Let’s show His lovingkindness to a hurting world.

Life is short. Live it well.

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God, thanks for Your love and grace. Lord, have mercy on our nation. We need You! May we live to bring glory to You. May we spread your joy and peace. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What about today’s post spoke to you? Are you living with GRRR or GRACE?

Tasks: Next time you read something that sets you off, ask yourself why. Notice your emotional response and what it does to you physically. Take 15 deep breaths and see if your heart rate goes down again. Pray before responding, if you respond at all.

A Path Forward

While last year, 2020, was a bust for many reasons, it was not all bad. For some people it was their worst year in recent memory, but that does not mean nothing good happened.

Each person deserves to feel and grieve however works best for them. The important thing is to actually deal with those emotions in healthy ways. If you’ve lost a loved one or a job or an important opportunity or event, it’s 100% normal to be sad or upset.

But, don’t toss aside what remains.

Whatever happens, God is holding you. Draw closer to Him, so He can help you get through it. Where there seems to be no way, He will make a path for you.

I did not make any resolutions for the new year. There are so many potential opportunities to make changes, but it seems most people try to do too much all at once and then quit. Instead, I have found making small, sustainable decisions can lead to long-term habits and success. Being consistent helps!

This year, I am reading through the Chronological NLT Bible again with friends. I really enjoy the materials from Aaron at biay.org, but this year, I am adding another resource, too. A journal and videos from Read thru the Word by Word Up Ministries.

Reading the Bible is a daily habit worth cultivating. In His wisdom, God’s Word has something new for us each time we read it. There’s always something to learn! The Bible was not meant for us to keep it on the shelf!

This week, I was reminded we don’t read the Bible just to learn nice lessons or learn about self-improvement. We read to learn Who God is and understand His character. This helps us understand His love and goodness.

When we know the heart of God, we can accept that His ways are higher than ours. We don’t have to get bent out of shape when our circumstances change, or are about to change. Trust in the Lord!

Each journey around the sun carries new opportunities. We only have so much time on this Earth, but each day is a new chance to cling to the Lord and all of His promises.

What are you bringing into this new day, or new year?

You could take fear, anxiety, and worry. You could also pack in some anger, bitterness, and resentment. Those are a little heavy, but somewhat understandable.

Or, you could bring faith, joy, peace, and gratitude with you! These are a much lighter load, and by God’s grace, they will give you the boost you need to keep moving forward.

The stakes are higher than ever, but we can trust God is in control. Let Him show you how to make lemonade on His terms. He’s got this.

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God, thanks for bringing us through many trials and troubles. You are so faithful and good! Help us trust You for greater things. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Question: Do your goals, plans, and dreams fill you with faith, joy, peace, and gratitude? Or, are you stuck because of fear, anxiety, worry, anger, bitterness, or resentment? What are you going to do with this knowledge?

Tasks: As you are setting up goals for the year, remember to run your plans by God first! Trust Him to take care of you regardless of ever-changing circumstances.