Tag: hope

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Prayer, Wisdom

Resolute

What a difference a week can make. The news about Ukraine is heartwrenching and horrible. The citizens are experiencing so much devastation and loss, but they are rallying. I am praying for wisdom, discernment, courage, peace, and protection there.

I am grateful for the unprecedented unity shown so far in Europe and pray it makes a difference in the outcome. I am also praying for our American role in all of this. We don’t know the best way forward, nor what the future holds… but God does.

We are collectively holding our breath to see what happens next, yet this present conflict is not a surprise to our Heavenly Father. It surely breaks His heart, but He is still in control. Nothing catches Almighty God off guard, and nothing can separate us from His unfailing love!

Sunflower, Yellow, Flower, Pollen, Petals, Bloom

As we start the season of Lent today, I am reminded of the sacrifice(s) Jesus made for us, and the sacrifice we are called to make, too. Are you ‘giving up’ anything for Lent? I am grateful to have the privilege of time to think about my many options, as I am sitting still, safe and warm, not fleeing for my life.

Being a Christian is a daily commitment and a call to war, at least in the spiritual sense. It’s not about “fire insurance,” comfort, or even finding significance, though in America, sometimes we forget. Nonetheless, we must not run away in difficult times but remain resolute in our faith. That doesn’t mean we don’t struggle, but we rely on God’s strength and power.

Thus, we don’t have to be afraid when the world is in chaos. We should expect tumultuous times, though not pursue them. But, ultimately, everything we do should be centered on Jesus Christ. That includes prayer, giving generously, and seeking the good of others. Yes, we bring the light of Jesus into the darkness of the world.

In areas where there is darkness vs. light conflict, people tend to come to Jesus en masse. Time and again, traumatic experiences and persecution make people crave “more” than what is in front of them. People become desperate, even when following Jesus puts them at greater risk. Do you and I chase after Jesus like that?

In countries where the Gospel (good news!) is forbidden, these followers share Bibles and meet in secret. They bravely choose Jesus. It’s rather convicting to consider that sometimes, I am running out the door on a prayer.

I’m sure you can relate, but the point is we need to be prepared for trials and tribulations because they are coming. We can’t afford to ‘just get by’ when it comes to prayer or other spiritual matters… we need to be in our Bibles and on our knees before God.

Maybe your personal time and comfort is something to sacrifice, for Lent, to start.

You know, we do not fight as the world does; we level up in prayer. Therefore, our hope is not in anything this world has to offer. Jesus is our Rock, our Savior, and our Defender, a strong tower in times of need.  Our Hope and our Victory are in Him alone.

The One who calls us to be holy and humble, righteous and faithful, just and peace-loving is also the One who calls us to stand firm and fight evil, to be strong and not give in to fear. Holy Spirit, empower us.

Ephesians 6:10-13, NIV says, “Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world, and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.”

Psalm 27:13 says, “Though an army may encamp against me, My heart shall not fear;
Though war may rise against me, In this I will be confident...”

Friends, this world is going to burn someday, but our Hope is unwavering… resolute.

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Jesus, Prince of Peace, we need You! Come quickly, Lord! Lead us and guide us. Give us wisdom to know what to do and the courage to do it. Refine us during this time as we bring Your light to the darkness of this world. Help us stand firm and walk in Victory. In Your Name, Amen

Question: Are you prayed up and prepared to stand firm during your next trial?

Task: Set aside time every day for prayer and Bible study. Be willing to do the difficult thing. Get up early, first things first. Turn off music, media, and anything else that threatens to take your focus. This is vital.

Posted on in Gratitude, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Wisdom, Worship

Glory to God in the Highest

Luke 2:14 says, “Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom His favor rests.” This is part of the Angels’ song and message to the shepherds when Baby Jesus was born. Lydia and I read that verse this week for Advent.

Then, on Monday, the winter solstice, we got to see the ‘great conjunction’ of Saturn and Jupiter. Apparently, this is the closest they have appeared in hundreds of years. We did not have a telescope but relied on my pair of binoculars, which I keep in the car.

I did not take any pictures, but it was really special just to take it in. I’m just glad we didn’t miss it. The weather was clear and I didn’t forget!

At home, Lydia and I ate dinner and discussed what we saw. A little while later, we happened to read that verse in Luke, and it took on new meaning for us.

Glory to God in the highest heaven: I explained how when we are on an airplane we are within Earth’s atmosphere,  far, but not too far away.

Next, we have the higher levels of our atmosphere, where the International Space Station orbits. Then, there are stars and planets in our solar system, followed by other galaxies, quasars, black holes, and who knows what else.

Humans have been looking toward the skies for millennia, wondering what is ‘out there.’ Thankfully, technology has helped fill in some of of the gaps.

In fact, the Hubble Telescope, one of the most famous space telescopes, recently turned thirty years old. It was launched in 1990, and I have enjoyed the many images over the years. In college, I even had many of them posted on my bedroom walls.

I love how Psalm 19:1-6, says, “The heavens declare the glory of God;
    the skies proclaim the work of his hands.
2 Day after day they pour forth speech;
    night after night they reveal knowledge.
3 They have no speech, they use no words;
    no sound is heard from them.
4 Yet their voice goes out into all the earth,
    their words to the ends of the world.
    In the heavens God has pitched a tent for the sun.“

Taking Luke 2:14 (above) into account, “the highest heaven” seems sooo far away. Yet, God is not unapproachable or unavailable. He is right here with us. Emmanuel.

This week, as we celebrate Jesus’ birth, maybe you just aren’t “feeling” it. Yes, it’s been a tough year. But, that’s exactly why Jesus came. To bring comfort and peace and restore joy. Therefore, we can focus not just on presents, but on His presence. Keep looking up!

Jesus came through perhaps a gazillion light years (way more than we can comprehend) to save us from sin and set us free from death. What a savior!

Yes, the God of the Universe humbly volunteered to rescue His people and bring us back into relationship with Himself. As high as the Heavens are above the earth, so great is God’s love for us (Psalm 103:11). No one loves us like He does!

Clearly, Jesus didn’t just go the extra mile. He stepped across time and space to show us just how much He loves us! Thank You, Jesus, and Happy Birthday!

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God, we glorify You and magnify Your name! May we bring You honor and understand Your great love for us so we can share it with others. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Questions: Did you get to see the planetary phenomenon this week? If so, what did you think?!

Tasks: Check out the Hubble Telescope site. Look through some of the classic images and give God praise. Remember: He loves us even more than all of those celestial bodies combined!

Posted on in Books and Movies I Like, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Kindness, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Wisdom

God’s Kindness, A Calling Card

Recently, I was talking with a lady who was widowed about a year ago. Understandably, she has been missing her late husband quite a bit, especially as we head into the holiday season. As a result, she has been reading books and articles about the afterlife.

It may be comforting to read about what our loved ones are experiencing in Heaven (if they go there), but she mentioned some ideas that made me a little wary. Humans who die do not become guardian angels, for instance!

I did my best to answer her questions about my own grief journey. Then, I guided her to the Truth…that is, I pointed her back to Jesus!!

Later, my friend said, “God’s judgment doesn’t seem as bad as one would expect,” based on her reading of other people’s near death experiences. I didn’t ask what she was referencing, but still, I felt the need to gently clarify a few things for her.

First, God’s judgment and wrath is very serious. He doesn’t play favorites, punishing some sinners but not others. We see this over and over in the Bible. 

In the Old Testament, God banished Adam and Eve from the Garden of Eden. Then, we read about the Flood, and later, King David losing a child as a result of adultery. We also see Judah being exiled to Assyria and Israel being exiled to Babylon after generations of debauchery. And, these were God’s chosen people!

In the New Testament, new Christians (Ananias and Sapphira) were struck dead for lying to the Holy Spirit. There are other cases of pending judgment in the book of Revelation.

Second, God’s judgment is not unjust or without warning. He sent His Word through many prophets over many years, and later, Jesus Christ Himself! He warns us about the consequences of our choices. He asks us to confess our sins and turn from evil, choosing Life over Death. Then, He repeatedly gives us opportunities to repent and make things right. 

Apparently, we are slow learners, but I’m thankful He is so patient with us!

Nonetheless, there are consequences for our actions. For better or worse, we reap what we sow. Indeed, the Bible says we will be held accountable for our words and our actions.

Third, God’s mercy, grace, and forgiveness are bountiful. If we know Jesus and have accepted His FREE GIFT of salvation, we don’t have to be afraid of death or judgment. I am guessing this is what my friend meant to say.

Romans 2 is all about God’s law and judgment, but Romans 2:4 says that God’s kindness leads us to repentance. I love that! We see His generosity all around us, and His kindness is like a calling card. Oh, how God wants us to know Him and be with Him! 

It’s like when someone goes out of their way to bless you, help you, or meet a huge need. You are so thankful, you can’t help but live differently. You may ‘pay it forward’ or return the favor, or just become really close to the person because you appreciate what they did for you.

So it is with God’s kindness. He overwhelms us with His goodness, and we can’t help but bask in His love! We can never repay Him, but we can live differently as a result.

Only God’s love (through Jesus) can bring the true change we need. When we know how much He loves us, our lives will start to change. In gratitude, we can acknowledge the good things in our lives and give Him full credit! Let’s come to Jesus and receive His peace and joy today!

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God, You are so gracious and good to me. Thanks for all You do! Help me not take Your kindness for granted. I want to make choices that honor You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you accepted God’s free gift of salvation? How has God been kind to you? How has His kindness changed how you think and act (i.e. repent)?

Tasks: If you are curious to learn more, check out the book, Heaven, by Randy Alcorn. (There are still some things we just won’t know until we get there, but the author gives a comprehensive explanation and breaks down key points based on Scripture.)

**If you don’t know if you will end up in Heaven after you die, make that decision today!**

Posted on in Gratitude, Journey of Grace, Miscellaneous, Prayer, Worship

A Time for Healing

Sometimes God brings things full circle when we least expect it…

To start, the last gift I ever received from Dave was a gift certificate for Mother’s Day to a local massage place. I had been having a lot of neck and shoulder pain, and massage generally seemed to help. Plus, it was nice to be pampered!

Back in 2013, when I finally used the gift certificate, I burst into tears as soon as the massage therapist started. She stopped and asked me if I was okay. I explained that my husband had recently died and this massage was reminding me of him. She was very understanding and spoke comforting words to me.

Honestly, I have had noticeable back, shoulder, and neck pain for many years, noticable even in college around the time Dave and I met (in 2000). This is probably related to walking to campus every day with too many heavy books in my backpack! Perhaps, I did not focus on proper posture or prioritize self-care amid other daily life stresses… I just accepted the pain as normal for so many years.

While my pain may not be as bad as someone else’s pain, it has hindered my choice to be as active as I would like. I have gone “easy” when exercising, in order to not make the pain worse. The pain has been building over time, and I haven’t wanted to push myself.

Flash forward through many massages, yoga, chiropractic care, a new mattress, several new pillows, and various contraptions to “help” my pain in the 7.5 years since Dave died… I have spent a fair amount of money trying to find the missing link in becoming well again!

Well, I recently found ‘one more thing’ that promised to build shoulder strength. It seemed fairly simple and only takes a few minutes. By focusing on several muscles, it helps cover any other weak or torn areas. The tool is called ROTATOReliever (not an affiliate), and I figured the money-back guarantee was worth me trying it.

To my great relief, my pain has been nearly eliminated!

I can now sit up fully straight with no issues, other than if I sleep funny or start to slouch or am at my computer for a long time. I have been amazed to have long periods of no pain at all. I’m pinching myself, and wondering if it will last. I am also doing more exercises and challenging myself more.

I am still being careful, to some degree because I don’t want to blow my success! I will certainly keep up with these new habits to maintain being pain-free, but at this point, I am calling it a win. I have been praying for healing all these years!

Then, to bring it back around, this week, I was off from work on Monday. I decided to use up what remained of another massage gift certificate (from my birthday). My massage therapist is moving to a new location, so I wanted to use it up before she leaves.

I did not expect things to come full circle, but this time, she was the emotional one. She said she was nervous to open her own business, and I did my best to encourage her. I really appreciate this massage therapist’s approach to body work, and I will likely follow her to her new practice.

But, throughout the massage, I kept bracing myself for the usual pain. I kept waiting for the first twinge, but then I noticed something. I had no pain at all! This was a first for me, and it caught me by surprise and made me praise God! What a breakthrough to have little to no pain! Not only that, but I was also able to encourage someone who comforted me when I really needed it before.

Sometimes, God brings immediate, miraculous healing. But, most often, healing takes time. Changing our habits takes effort, as there are many layers to growth! Success is not just from one tool, but from many positive changes all adding up. And still at other times, He takes us to Heaven for a more complete healing. No matter how he does it, He is faithful.

Whatever season you find yourself in, remember to trust God. He is with you and for you; He will make all things right in His time. Nothing surprises God, and nothing is impossible for Him. Perhaps He wants to use you (and your joy or pain) to bless someone else. Either way, He’s got your covered with His grace!

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God, thanks for Your healing touch! Thanks for not only restoring my heart and body, but also for letting me encourage others. Help me extend Your grace to others so they may experience Your goodness, too. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What life season do you find yourself in? Are you content or not? Do you have more joy or more pain? Are there any changes you can make? How can you turn the situation over to God?

Tasks: Read Ecclesiastes Chapter 3. Time does not heal all wounds, but God can and does. Trust Him!

Posted on in Being Gracious, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Parenting, Perseverance, Personality, Wisdom, Words

Love Moved First

I love how God always prompts us to move out of our comfort zone. He often guides us by placing several “markers” around us. For me, this most noticeable when sermons, songs, conversations, and circumstances all line up.

Being a mom also has a way of bringing up certain topics! It is important for me to set a good example for Lydia, so I can coach her through her own issues.

God’s timing and Lydia’s questions about friendship got me thinking!

Good relationships take time to cultivate. Friendships are an investment.

Over time, I’ve learned to take responsibility to preserve my friendships if I value them.

Then again, not every relationship needs to be salvaged. This can be especially difficult when feelings have been hurt and the other person doesn’t seem to care. Sometimes growth means growing apart instead of closer together. And that’s okay.

We live. We learn. We move on.

However, as long as it is up to me (Romans 12:18), I need to do everything God is asking me to do when things go wrong. I can forgive, even if the other person does not apologize.

Besides, forgiveness is not really about the other person. It sets me free and makes me right with God. Then, I can move forward with peace. Thank You, Jesus.

The true test of a good friend is that they point me to Jesus and bring out my best traits. They pray for me, call me out, and lift me higher. I do the same for them. 

We won’t always agree, but we will allow for each other’s differences. We will give each other the benefit of the doubt (instead of presuming the worst).

There will be both give and take in a healthy relationship. If it is a good fit, it will stand under pressure. But, I may need to prayerfully reconsider how close someone is (or should be) if it is always a one-sided relationship.

Thankfully, I can follow Jesus’ example. He did the right thing, even when it cost Him greatly. He made the first step while we were still unaware of the problem (Romans 5:8).

I can also take the first steps of obedience, even if what happened isn’t my fault or my problem. I can extend grace, even when it feels unfair. Grace, by definition, is undeserved. 

If I want to be like Jesus and live for Him, I have to be willing to go the extra mile and turn the other cheek. Ultimately, it’s not about me, but what God is doing through me.

Similarly, I don’t have to let someone’s stubbornness harden my heart, too. I don’t have to accept their behavior or abandon my convictions, but I can always be gracious.

In fact, the person may never change… but I can keep praying for them anyway.

Reaching out may mean calling or sending a card to let someone know I care. It could mean inviting them over to hang out, but that may not always be possible. In some cases, the best thing I can do is give the person space. Often, time and distance bring clarity.

Of course, each decision requires a certain measure of prayer and wisdom. Indeed, it can be challenging to be supportive yet not get sucked into someone else’s drama! A true friend will show up and be willing to have difficult conversations.

As long as I set solid boundaries, I am able to let God direct my path, knowing He will bring the right people in my life. And while it is sad when people choose to leave, I can continue being kind and trust God will be good to them as well. He loves us all so much!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for Your unconditional love. Help me love people like You do, with hope, grace, and perseverance. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Is there a relationship in your life that needs a little extra TLC? How is God leading you? Is there something specific you should do to reach out?

Tasks: Listen to the song, “Love Moved First,” by Casting Crowns.

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Journey of Grace, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Wisdom

There’s Always a Catch!

Have you ever noticed how when one thing starts going right, something else seems to go wrong? For example, when the washing machine finally gets fixed, the drier needs repaired or the laundry detergent runs out. Or, you finally remember a coupon at the grocery store but find out it has expired.

Why is there always a catch?

You may leave for work extra early but still get stuck in traffic. Or, you get your oil changed but then your breaks start squeaking. Or, you waited to go sledding until the wind finally dies down but then the bitter cold settles in.

Why can’t we get a break?

At this time of year, for some people, life can seem to close in as we are reminded of all we are missing or all that has been lost. Perhaps you’ve lost a job or relationship. Perhaps life has just turned out differently than expected.

Years ago, I discovered an interesting Bible verse in my own grief. Deuteronomy 33:27 says, “The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.” At first, it seems like an odd verse. Underneath are the everlasting arms…say what?

But when my late husband, Dave, died, I gained more understanding. Emotionally, it felt like the floor literally fell out from underneath my feet. My life was changed in an instant. But soon, that same verse brought me great comfort as I envisioned God catching me and drawing me near.

For those in the midst of intense grief, it can feel like you are falling with no place to land. It can be difficult to know which way is up. It might even feel like things will never get better. I get it. I’ve been there, too.

But, God caught me… and I know He will catch you too!

Maybe the Christmas season has you feeling down. Yet, that’s why Jesus came. He came not to simply bring light to the darkness, but to BE the light that extinguishes it.

Jesus came not to just fix what was broken but to give us a new purpose. He came not just to rescue us, but to give us a new life in Him. He is our living Hope.

During the holidays, it’s easy to get caught up in the excitement or stuck in our emotions. In both cases, we risk missing Jesus altogether. Thankfully, with God, there’s always a catch!

Jesus is our Rescuer.

When life gets chaotic, free-fall into God’s open arms. He’s waiting for you, so cling to Him. Whatever you are going through today, whether it is exciting or exhausting, invite Jesus in. He’s got you surrounded in grace and peace.

Let Him catch you and comfort you. His love never fails!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for sending Jesus, Our Rescuer. Thanks for catching us and holding us close. Please keep us focused on You instead of our circumstances. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Are there any Bible verses that you have found odd only to understand later on in a more personal way? If so, share in the comments!

Task: Listen to the song, “Power of Your Love,” sung by Darlene Zschech. Make it your heart’s cry and draw close to Jesus.

 

Posted on in Being Gracious, Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Personality, Prayer, Wisdom

Insult and Injury

Have you ever felt like just when something got good, it all went bad?

Have you ever felt like just when God started moving, Satan came to steal it all away?

Our enemy wants nothing more to do than to get us off God’s path. He stirs up trouble using fear and uncertainty to make us second-guess what is going on. He lies to us and does anything he can to derail us. In the chaos, he steals, kills, and destroys. 

But don’t throw away what is good, all you have worked for and what remains. There is so much at stake, far beyond what we can see. If we don’t seek God’s Truth and perspective, we risk losing it all. Yet nothing is impossible with God. There is always hope!

He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it (Philippians 1:6).

Just about everything in life has the potential to turn sour. A job, a relationship, a home, a vehicle, your health, your plans, or your finances… It’s even worse when these things are all connected. It can feel like the enemy is winning.

Clearly, having healthy boundaries and making wise decisions is important. We have to take responsibility for our choices. We have ‘free will’ to make decisions, but we are not free from the consequences. Occasionally, the circumstances are out of our hands.

For many of us, the temptation is to live by our emotions—to worry about what went wrong or to blame someone else. We want the pain to go away, so we tend to either run away or retaliate. Don’t give in.

In some cases, we choose to move on and hope something better comes along. Yet avoidance can be confusing and depressing if we don’t deal with the problem in healthy ways. It can fester and often becomes worse.

When someone doesn’t meet our expectations, we take offense and want to get even. When we don’t get what we wanted or thought we needed or deserved, we understandably grow mad. Yet, we can choose to offer the grace of forgiveness.

Dear Friend, I don’t know what happened, but I know it hurts. Whatever went wrong, I wish I could take away your pain. I know it may feel unfair, but please don’t give up. Forgiveness is just as important for you as it is for the other person (or people). You can never grow past this if you do not release it and learn from it.

Life is full of challenges. When we get passed over for a promotion, we focus on our failures. When we take a financial hit, we try to figure out how to make ends meet. When our health is affected, we wish things were different. The more we think about the injustices, the more power they have over us. Still, we can choose to think differently.

Many times, we did everything right. What happened as a result is not our fault. But even if we do have legitimate reasons to be upset, we weren’t meant to live under the duress of insult and injury. We were made for freedom!

Our emotions are volatile. There are days when our feelings can change every five minutes! Take some space if needed, but don’t rush a decision. Wait it out.

Imagine what could happen if you stay still and don’t overreact. Your situation might be different than expected, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be turned around for good. Especially if God is in it.

Perhaps you’re going through something that is testing everything you thought was sure. The pain and sorrow are more than you can bear. It’s going to take a lot of patience and effort, but you are not in this alone—bring it to Jesus and let Him handle it. He sees the big picture; our victory is in Him alone!

By faith, do what you can to make things right and leave the rest with Jesus. He knows all about unfairness and can help you work through it. He provides for you, loves you dearly, and always has your best in mind. Forever faithful, He will make a way where there seems to be no way. Trust Him!

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Heavenly Father, thanks for Your constant love and grace. Help us to make wise decisions in the midst of trials. Give us peace and help us trust You more. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What if all you’ve been going through will be used to strengthen you and even help someone else? Would that change your perspective and help you endure it? Would that change how you are dealing with it?

Tasks: When trials come, we want to take matters in our own hands, but don’t do anything you’ll regret. Life is short; don’t spend your days in anger or bitterness. Find a trusted friend and/or seek wise counsel. Take it to Jesus and let Him fight for you. God’s got this!

Posted on in Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance, Prayer, Wisdom

Regarding Lazarus

Last year I began scribing the Gospel of John with several friends. A handful of people have finished but I’m about halfway through. I recently completed John Chapter 11 word-for-word.

I stayed in Chapter 11 through the holidays. You could say I “sat” with Lazarus for about two weeks because I could relate…

Lazarus and his two sisters, Mary and Martha, were close friends of Jesus. They lived in Bethany, about two miles outside Jerusalem. Somehow, I had previously missed that small detail—Bethany was nearby.

Jesus received word that Lazarus was sick, but surprisingly He didn’t go there right away. In fact, He postponed his arrival for two days. By then, Lazarus was dead.

Now I don’t know about you, but a two-mile walk would take me around thirty minutes or less. It might take me longer if I stopped to chat or run another errand. But I could easily make it in an hour.

So why did Jesus delay? He could have easily just spoken from a distance and Lazarus would have been healed. Jesus did not procrastinate but stayed where He was on purpose. He knew the Father’s plan and He knew the final outcome.

To gain some insight, I re-read the story several times.

At one point it hit me: I could understand how Martha and Mary must’ve felt when they questioned Jesus. Perhaps they felt some sense of betrayal, anger, or abandonment… He was only 2 miles away. I’m sure they felt desperation and the pain of unbearable grief. IF ONLY Jesus had shown up, when they thought He should, things would’ve been different.

My paraphrase: “Lord, if you had been here, this would never have happened!!” We so easily question God with our limited understanding, but His ways are not our ways.

When Dave was sick, there were so many times when it felt like God wasn’t listening or wasn’t working on our behalf. Often, we prayed about a test or symptom only to have the opposite happen. It was very frustrating!

I know God never leaves us nor forsakes us, and He certainly did not betray me. But my feelings sometimes got the best of me…

Yet, because Jesus stayed put and didn’t rush, He was then able to explain that He is the Resurrection and the Life. He was able to do one final miracle, which pointed to His own death and resurrection. He was able to increase His followers’ faith. He was able to bring His Father glory. He was able to give us hope 2000+ years later as well.

A short while later, in John 12, Jesus once again hangs out with his friends, Mary, Martha, and the resurrected Lazarus. I bet they all rehashed what they had been through together.

I wonder what Lazarus thought about all of this. I’m sure he and his sisters were grateful to be able to understand God’s love for them in a more personal way.

Time for a quick disclaimer: Our Heavenly Father wants what is good for us and is eager that we should be whole and healthy. And while I do believe we should seek God’s healing, healing should not be our primary goal (in and of itself).

Healing is certainly wonderful, but it’s not the end-all be-all. (Hey, Lazarus died twice!)

To be clear, sickness is not from God, and it is important to take care of our bodies in whatever way we can. For example, healthy food, exercise, adequate sleep, stress reduction, medicine, prayer, and counseling are all good. Absolutely!

For some people, healing happens in an instant, but for others, it takes time. Unfortunately, when healing doesn’t come on our terms or in our timing, some people are lead to believe they don’t have enough faith. They can even feel ashamed of being unwell.

Proverbs 17:22 says, “A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.”

Judging someone else’s faith or experience is unfair and unkind... not to mention inaccurate. Let’s be careful not add to someone’s suffering or burden them with ‘if only’ scenarios. Instead, let’s offer grace and support.

Some of the godliest and most faith-filled people I know live with chronic pain or health issues. I admire them and learn so much from them! They’re tough!

Anyway, no matter what happens, whether God heals us on our terms or not, our sole focus should be on Jesus. How can He use us for His glory?

Just remember: God can use us in whatever condition we are... dead or alive!! 🙂

Jesus wept when He saw Lazarus’ tomb. It brought Jesus great sadness, and He told His disciples He was glad for their sake that He was not there when Lazarus died. But if He had “only” healed Lazarus, we ALL would have missed so much.

Lazarus was dead four days before being resurrected, which proves nothing is impossible for Jesus! If you need healing or another form of help, Jesus is able and willing! Trust Him!

Dave and I prayed for healing, yes. And though it came differently than expected, God was (and has been) ever-faithful. Dave received FULL healing when he went to Heaven. Thankfully, God has been healing my heart as well.

I am grateful that Jesus isn’t bound by my timeline (what I think He should do and when). I don’t have all the answers, but I do know God excels at bringing dead things to life. He resurrects and restores!

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Heavenly Father, You are so faithful. Thanks taking such good care of us. Help us trust You when we do not understand. In You, We have Victory! In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: What is your ‘Lazarus?’ What do you need God to resurrect or restore?

Tasks: Listen to “Still Rolling Stones,” by Lauren Daigle. Check out the Journibles here!

Posted on in Books and Movies I Like, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Perseverance

Book Review: When Breath Becomes Air

This week I finished a book that has been in my queue for quite some time. The book, When Breath Becomes Air, was published in 2016, but in all honesty, I wasn’t ready for it back then.

Several friends recommended the book, but I didn’t know if I could handle the intensity at the time. I didn’t want to get sucked into another cycle of grief!

Now, however, I am in a much different place. I decided to listen to the audio version, but I do have a copy of the physical book as well. I highly recommend this book!

The book was written by Paul Kalanithi, a neurosurgeon diagnosed with lung cancer in 2013 at the age of 36. He died in March 2015 just before his 38th birthday, and this book tracks his journey from physician to patient.

The story is quite compelling on its own, but even more so because of our own experience with cancer. I was struck by the similarities between this story and ours.

Mr. Kalanithi was on the verge of reaching his career goals—yet was sidetracked with sickness. Like my late husband, Dave, he did his best at work—regardless of how he felt physically. Both men loved their jobs!

The book also discusses how terminal illness can make a marriage and other relationships stronger. That happened to us too. Mr. Kalanithi sought to secure a good future for his wife, Lucy, and infant daughter, who was born while he was sick. He was always thinking about them.

As his death grew nearer, time seemed to slow down for the author. All of his accolades and accomplishments did not matter. He just wanted to soak up time with his wife, little daughter, and other loved ones.

Mr. Kalanithi was particularly close to his family, and I appreciated the fact that they were so supportive. I, too, am grateful for all the support we have received from family and friends!

For much of the book, it was as if I was hearing Dave tell his side of the story. I found it comforting to perhaps understand a little more about how Dave might’ve felt.

The book was different enough from my experiences that I didn’t have a hard time listening. Yet, the last few chapters were quite compelling because the author’s thoughts, feelings, and physical limitations paralleled what I went through with Dave.

Despite the heartbreak, it was reassuring to hear the same types of questions we dealt with regarding chemo, palliative care, and end of life decisions.

I was encouraged to hear Mr. Kalanithi talk about his faith and hope. He knew the risks and statistics about lung cancer but was never hopeless. He wanted to live his life to the fullest and sought purpose and meaning each day.

Both Mr. Kalanithi and Dave were in their mid-thirties when they were diagnosed and died. Mr. Kalanithi had lung cancer and Dave had colon cancer, but both are not as common in younger people. (Though, that may be changing now.)

Both men had young daughters too little to remember their fathers. Cady Kalanthi was 8 months old when her daddy died; Lydia was 17 months old when Dave died. I’m thankful for the legacies these men left behind.

Neither the author nor my late husband spent much time feeling sorry for themselves. They didn’t complain, but were brave and set an example for others!

If you haven’t already read this book, please consider it! It was helpful to remember that my story is not all that unique. Instead of focusing on all I have lost, I can cherish what I do have: Lydia and precious memories.

Praise God, I also have hope and a good future ahead of me (Jeremiah 29:11)! Yes, Life has turned out differently than expected, but Jesus has been so faithful all these years.

He is so good to us!

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Dear God, thanks for taking such good care of me. Thanks for Your protection and provision through life’s ups and downs. Thank You for your grace! I trust You for a good future. In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you read any good books lately? Do prefer physical books or audiobooks or ebooks?

Tasks: Check out this book! Let me know what you think!

Posted on in Fear/Don't Fake Brave, Journey of Grace, Life is Short, Miscellaneous, Worship

A Note to My 29 Year-Old Self

This week I am celebrating! Not only is it my birthday week, it’s also the one year mark of making my blog public. Can you believe it?! I feel it is still a work in progress, but I am so grateful for you all. Thanks for sticking with me! 🙂

birthday candles

Dave often celebrated my birthday week. That’s because one year, he forgot the exact date and decided to give me gifts every day! He was pretty smooth like that.

These days, celebrating my birthday, like many other things, is different without him.

Typically, I’ll eat lunch with a friend, talk with lots of friends and family, and get a massage. This year, I am also taking Lydia to a local (minor league) baseball game. She’s been asking to go all summer, and the fireworks at the end might be a special perk!

Around my birthday, I like to look back on the last year and set some goals for the next. For whatever reason, this week I also considered all that has happened since moving to Fargo six years ago this month. It’s bittersweet.

Grace mug_Eph 2-8

I have noticed many major life events have occurred since my 29th birthday. In short:

I was twenty-nine when Lydia was born. While Dave and I were thrilled to be parents, the sleeplessness threw us for a loop! Five months later, we were just starting to sleep well when Dave was diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer. After 364 days of fighting cancer with Dave, I became a widow and single mom at the age of thirty.

Hence, the last few years have been a continual adjustment (and readjustment). So much has changed. But far be it from me to complain!

chocolate cupcake

Have you ever wished you could tell your former self how something works out? Hindsight brings clarity! I can’t explain it all in a simple blog post, but God has been so good to us.

Someday I’ll have all the words… but not today. So for now, with much gratitude, here’s a note I wrote to my 29 year-old self!

Hello, dear Self,

I know you cannot comprehend all that the next few years entail. You can’t possibly fathom the pain and struggles that lie ahead. But God does—and He’s got this.

You don’t realize this now, but fear has been a constant presence lurking in the back of your mind. It limits your decisions at times.

Yet God knows this—and He’s going to free you from all your fears. What’s more, as He destroys old mindsets, you will learn to walk in Victory. The whole process will certainly be scary, but He will lead you through. Trust Him!

Sometimes, this journey will make you question everything you believe about God. But He is big enough to handle your doubts and fears, your anger and resentment.

He’s got this.

There will be moments you can barely breathe. You won’t know how you’re going to make it. When you think you cannot take anymore, you’re right. But take it to Jesus. He is your hope and firm anchor. Let Him carry the burden for you. He cares for you deeply and knows exactly what you need.

When you feel like giving up or running away, stand firm. The battle belongs to the Lord. He is your shield, your protector, and your defense. He’s got you covered!

When everything falls apart, you will see God holding together what remains. He is your rock and your salvation! Everything that really matters is secure in Him.

Yes, dear Self, life gets rough up ahead. It can feel quite heavy at times. But don’t worry. God’s got this! In fact, there is much good along the way.

New goals and dreams, new purposes and plans. Long-awaited answers to prayer.

God will use these experiences to show you just how much He loves you. He will prove His love and power are stronger than any difficult thing you will (ever) face.

 And yes, He’s absolutely got this!

It won’t be easy, but in time, you will see the pattern of grace. From this side of it all, it actually IS amazing. When the dust settles, you will be grateful. And despite all odds, you will still wake up with wonder at this life you get to live. What a gift!

What felt like defeat, was really training grounds for a new path. Where there was doubt, trust will deepen. In place of despair, hope will rise. In the midst of pain, you will find peace and beauty. You will flourish!

Praise God—He’s got this!

So do not be afraid, dear Self. You are always loved, never alone. God will not falter. His mercies are new every morning, and His grace is more than enough.

Keep your head held high, because the best is yet to come. God is working all this for good, even when you don’t see how. It will be beyond your wildest imagination!

Seek God’s grace and goodness each day. Rejoice in the Lord’s unfailing love and faithfulness! Most of all, hold on tight to Jesus.

Cling to Him for He is your strength and your life.

And you know what? He’s got this!!

XOXO,

Your 30-something Self

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Gracious God, thank You for bringing me through with Victory. I celebrate your loving kindness—You are so good to me! Bless this next year and help me live for you! In Jesus’ Name, Amen

Questions: Have you ever written yourself a note like this? What words of wisdom would you write?