I overheard some really joyful news this week about a not-so-close-friend. I really like her, but, I am not sure I will reach out. We haven’t seen each other in a couple of years, and I don’t know how she would respond. I assume if she wanted me to know, it would be clear. I’m sure she will make an official announcement when she’s ready.
We have never been ‘super’ close; we just had a few good times together. For now, I will pray for her and cheer her on behind the scenes. And, if I get the chance, I will tell her how happy I am for her.
Do you have friends like that? Or maybe the term really should be acquaintances. š
Indeed, many people are in my not-too-close category. It’s not that we don’t connect; people consistently tell me I am friendly and approachable. I am compassionate and good at listening. When asked for help, I always provide a basic plan to follow. But, then the problem is solved, and they tend to move on.
So, I don’t know if it is me or them, or both! It certainly could just be a bunch of random circumstances not worth mulling over. Yet, here we are. š
When it comes to relationships, we’ve all heard something to the effect that if they talk about other people with you, they will talk about you with other people. But, I avoid gossip because so many people trust me to keep their confidence and I take that seriously.
I’m also fairly low-key. No drama here… but that also makes me one of the last to know!
Similarly, I use caution (wisdom!) when opening up to people. I’m fairly good at reading people and know not to misplace my trust. (#boundaries) I am okay with having a few solid friends who ‘get me’ rather than many loose acquaintances. It is important to know who’s in your corner.
Randomly, I think, “Hmm, maybe I’m just not that memorable, or maybe I just don’t have anything exciting to offer.” Case in point: I am great at remembering names and personal details, but I often have to reintroduce myself to people… multiple times, which gets old. Thankfully, Jesus never forgets me – He knows me better than I do!
I suppose most of these thoughts reflect my introverted personality. I am quiet and appreciate solitude, but I’m not really shy. I shine in asking good questions, but people don’t often reciprocate. I’ve been told I’m ‘blendable’ and can relate to a wide variety of people and interests. While that may mean I get lost in a crowd, maybe I’m the gel that helps keep everything cohesive. I appreciate that about myself!
Building community can be an art. Though, I only have so much extra time and energy, and we are all going in different directions with various obligations. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it may preclude vulnerability.
To clarify, having a lot of friends and acquaintances is a huge blessing. I have needed help from at least four friends this summer (Lydia, yardwork, questions, etc.). Yet, while my friends (and family) are sometimes unavailable, Jesus is always there for me.
Despite my occasional self-doubt, I understand it’s not ‘all about me.’ I am an Ambassador for Christ, so I am happy to share anything personal to help someone grow closer to Jesus for Eternity. It could be embarrassing, but as long as it is useful, I don’t mind! If that brings awkward conversations, so be it!
Ultimately, our contact list, Facebook likes, birthday shoutouts, or blog followers can only get us so far. They have a place, yes, but they don’t measure our true worth. Afterall, we don’t have to be popular, but we do need to live purposefully.
So, let’s draw closer to Jesus every day. He always welcomes us in and is eager to chat, no matter how much time may have passed!
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God, thanks for Your Friendship! You never let me go! Help me be a good friend, and help me keep drawing closer to You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen
Questions: Did you know there are more than seventy varieties of forget-me-nots? How do you invest in your friendships?
Task: Make a list of your best qualities and how they apply to friendship. When it feels like people have abandoned you, pull out the list and pray about your next steps. (Don’t sell yourself short. Not all relationships are intended to last forever, and that’s okay!)
